jessfantasyland

[jessfantasyland]

Panic attack 12/24/22- 12/25/22

So, I have panic attacks! My last one is finally wearing off! It started on Christmas Eve and has lasted 3 days, but I just keep moving because I have to. I just wish I knew what triggered them, maybe it’s stress or feeling worthless. I am leaning more toward stress?… I am currently moving from my old rv to my new rv that has more living space that a toy hauler. It’s wonderful! But I am having to go through thing from three years ago and people keep giving me a hard time about it. Like “why are you here when you should be working on the rv?” , trying to give me a hard time about it. But After awhile it gets to you and, if you are like me then you put to the aside and then one day you have a panic attack! Blah… is how I feel.

[jessfantasyland]

Halloween nails done by @beauty_by_celeste_ I love these nails 🧡🎃👻💀 #purpleandblack #slimegreen #slime #halloween #halloweennails #moonandstars #spiderwebs #evileye #snake #lovethem (at Emmalynn Salon, Inc) https://www.instagram.com/p/CjBYbh1O7pr/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[jessfantasyland]

My treat junkie in her fall collar! Loving the flower! Got it on Etsy her shop is Chic Pooch Boutique! #maltese #blackandorange #falldogcollar #treatjunkie #loveschicken #givesmethechicken #maltesedog #doglover (at Mims, Florida) https://www.instagram.com/p/Ci8gUa0rTHD/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[jessfantasyland]

Mental Illness

I don't know everything in the world. No one does but what I don't know if I am mad but frustrating is when someone thinks that person knows everything about mental health. I will tell you that I do not know everything about mental health but that a simple pill and therapy don't always work.

I use this site as an outlet most of the time for my own mental health. It helps to write it down and get it out. To help write it down where people may or may not read what is going through my head.

I just feel drained and worthless lately. I hate this feeling but when I smoke herb it helps, I just do not want to rely on it.

I will update yall later. Toddles.

[jessfantasyland]

Helpless

I feel so helpless. When someone gets your hopes up and then does not respond to your messages or phone calls. This is what happens when I try to sell in a dealership setting. I will never say who or what dealership. I just feel helpless and worthless. I knew I wouldn't have raised my hopes up. I knew better. Maybe it will turn out to be good. But I seriously doubt it but we shall see I am not getting my hopes up just to be disappointed.

[jessfantasyland]

Little of this and that

Today's thought of the day is should I start a Sourdough Starter. I really like Sourdough bread. So I believe it is a yes; however, this is going on with this decision. Which brand or sourdough starter should I go with then if I have the room in my fridge because I live in an RV fifth wheel. Almost forgot, did I mention that my husband and I are getting a new RV? It's a beautiful sapphire blue redwood. I will take pictures and show yall. I am in love with it. Can't wait to move into my new home.

[jessfantasyland]

Confident and strangely annoying people

I have a hunch, that today is going to be one of those days that you have those confident, arrogant, all about themselves people. The ones that spit out their phone number so fast that you have to ask them to repeat it a few times because they can't slow down enough to treat you like a human being. Then when you ask them to repeat the number, they give you this snarky look, like weren't you paying attention even if you were. I attempt to be positive and upbeat. It's not always possible. We will just have to see what today brings.

[jessfantasyland]

I am Good Enough

Sometimes, when you awaken to ponder that you are insignificant to the world, you just need to scream at the top of your lungs. I hate how my mind tricks me into thinking that people expect me to be perfect. But in reality, the people who love me want me to be who I am. Herbs help with depression and anxiety, but I don't fancy relying on anything or anyone. I promise I will post more positive things in the future just to let everyone knows. I am obsessed with Harry Potter, Disney, crafting, reading, crocheting, and much more. I am a little bit of a dweeb, my Husband would say. I am just me, sometimes I have good days, and some days I stay in bed and do not want to face the world.