jedi-mattdecker-blog

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Sleeping At Last // I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)

[jedi-mattdecker-blog]

How to Say Said via WriteWorld

How to Say Said

NOTE: We are updating this page (slowly but surely) to include definitions for each word on this list. We will also be dividing the words into different categories for ease of use on a separate page in the near future. Thank you for your patience.

A

abjured: formally reject or disavow a formerly held belief, usually under pressure.

accused: charge (someone) with an offense or crime.

acknowledged: accept or admit the existence or truth of; express or display gratitude for or appreciation of.

added: say as a further remark; contribute (an enhancing quality).

addressed: speak to (a person or an assembly), typically in a formal way; name someone in a specified way when talking or writing; say or write remarks or a protest to (someone).

admitted: confess to be true or to be the case, typically with reluctance; acknowledge.

admonished: warn or reprimand someone firmly; advise or urge (someone) earnestly.

advised: inform (somebody) of something; to counsel, recommend, or suggest.

advocated: publicly recommend or support; preach, speak, plead, or argue in favor of.

affirmed: state as a fact; assert strongly and publicly; declare one’s support for; uphold or defend; to declare or affirm solemnly and formally as true.

agreed: have the same opinion about something; concur; consent to do something that has been suggested by another person.

alleged: report or maintain; Claim or assert that someone has done something illegal or wrong, typically without proof that this is the case.

allowed: admit the truth of; concede.

alluded: suggest or call attention to indirectly; hint at; mention without discussing at length.

amended: correct a previous statement; to set right.

announced: make a public and typically formal declaration about a fact, occurrence, or intention.

answered: say or write something to deal with or as a reaction to someone or something.

apologized: express regret for something that one has done wrong.

appealed: make a serious or urgent request, typically to the public; challenge; request for a change in a decision.

appeased: pacify or placate (someone) by acceding to their demands.

approved: officially agree to or accept as satisfactory.

argued: give reasons or cite evidence in support of an idea, action, or theory, typically with the aim of persuading others to share one’s view; exchange or express diverging or opposite views, typically in a heated or angry way.

articulated: expressed; put into words; speak aloud.

ascribed: attribute something to (a cause); regard one thing as connected to another.

asked: say something in order to obtain an answer or some information.

assented: to agree or express agreement.

asserted: state a fact or belief confidently and forcefully.

asseverated: state categorically; to declare earnestly, seriously, or positively; to affirm.

assumed: take to be the case or to be true; accept without verification or proof; to express a belief of thought which is falsely adopted.

assured: tell someone something positively or confidently to dispel any doubts they may have.

attacked: criticize or oppose fiercely and publicly.

attested: declare that something exists or is the case.

averted: to turn aside or away; dismiss an action or comment in favor of one’s own beliefs; avoid.

avouched: affirm or assert; avowal: a statement asserting the existence or the truth of something.

B

babbled: talk rapidly and continuously in a foolish, excited, or incomprehensible way; utter something rapidly and incoherently; reveal something secret or confidential by talking impulsively or carelessly

baited: deliberately annoy or taunt

bantered: talk or exchange remarks in a good-humored teasing way

bargained: negotiate the terms and conditions of a transaction

barked: make a sound, such as a cough or a laugh, resembling a bark

bawled: shout or call out noisily and unrestrainedly

began: start speaking by saying

begged: ask (someone) earnestly or humbly for something; ask formally for (permission to do something)

bellowed: shout something with a deep loud roar

bellyached: complain noisily or persistently

bemoaned: express discontent or sorrow over (something)

berated: scold or criticize (someone) angrily

beseeched: ask (someone) urgently and fervently to do something; implore; entreat

besought: ask (someone) urgently and fervently to do something; implore; entreat

bewailed: express great regret, disappointment, or bitterness over (something) by complaining about it to others

bitched: informal. express displeasure; grumble

blabbed: reveal secrets by indiscreet talk

bleated: speak or complain in a weak, querulous, or foolish way

blew up: lose one’s temper

blubbered: sob noisily and uncontrollably

blurted: say (something) suddenly and without careful consideration

blustered: talk in a loud, aggressive, or indignant way with little effect

boasted: talk with excessive pride and self-satisfaction about one’s achievements, possessions, or abilities

boomed: say in a loud, deep, resonant voice

bragged: say in a boastful manner

breathed: uttered without voice

broke in: to interrupt a conversation or discussion

C

cackled: make a harsh sound resembling such a cry when laughing

cajoled: persuade someone to do something by sustained coaxing or flattery

called: cry out to (someone) in order to summon them or attract their attention

caroled: sing or say (something) happily

carped: complain or find fault continually, typically about trivial matters

caterwauled: make a shrill howling or wailing noise

cautioned: say something as a warning; warn or advise again (doing something)

cavilled: make petty or unnecessary objections

challenged: take exception to; ask for identification; questioning a statement and demanding an explanation

chanted: say or shout repeatedly in a sing-song tone

charged: formally accuse

chastised: rebuke or reprimand severely

chatted: talk in a friendly and informal way

chattered: talk rapidly or incessantly about trivial matters

cheered: shout for joy or in praise or encouragement; praise or encourage with shout; give comfort or support to

chided: scold or rebuke

chipped in: interrupt with comments; interject

chirped: utter a short, sharp, high-pitched sound; say something in a lively and cheerful way

choked: inability to speak or trouble speaking because of strong emotion; hold back or suppress speech; speak with difficulty

chortled: laugh in a breathy, gleeful way; chuckle

chuckled: laugh quietly or inwardly

cited: mention as an example; quote as evidence for or justification of an argument or statement

claimed: state or assert that something is the case, typically without providing evidence or proof; assert that one has gained or achieved (something); formally request or demand

clamored: shout loudly and insistently; make a vehement protest or demand

clarified: make (a statement or situation) less confused and more clearly comprehensible

clucked: make such a sound with (one’s tongue) to express concern or disapproval; express fussy concern about

coaxed: persuade (someone) gradually or by flattery to do something; manipulate (something) carefully into a particular shape or position

comforted: soothe in grief; console

commanded: give an authoritative order

commented: express (an opinion or reaction)

communicated: share or exchange information, news, or ideas

complained: express dissatisfaction or annoyance about a state of affairs or an event

conceded: admit that something is true or valid after first denying or resisting it

concluded: say in conclusion; decide to do something

concurred: be of the same opinion; agree

confessed: admit or state that one has committed a crime or is at fault in some way

confided: tell someone about a secret or private matter while trusting them not to repeat it to others

confirmed: establish or strengthen as with new evidence or facts

confuted: prove (a person or an assertion) to be wrong; disapprove 

consented: give permission for something to happen; agree to do something

consoled: comfort (someone) at a time of grief or disappointment

contended: assert something as a position in an argument

contested: oppose (an action, decision, or theory) as mistaken or wrong

continued: carry on speaking after a pause or interruption

contradicted: deny the truth of (a statement), esp. by asserting the opposite

contravened: conflict with (a right, principle, etc.), esp. to its detriment; dispute

contributed: give one’s views in a discussion

cooed: make a soft murmuring sound; speak in a soft gentle voice, typically to express affection

coughed: say something in a harsh, abrupt way

counseled: give advice to (someone); recommend

countered: speak or act in opposition to; respond to hostile speech or action

cried: shout or scream, esp. to express one’s fear, pain, or grief; say something in an excited or anguished tone of voice

criticized: indicate the faults of (someone or something) in a disapproving way

croaked: make a characteristic deep hoarse sound when speaking or laughing

crooned: say in a soft, low voice

cross-examined: question (someone) aggressively or in great detail

crowed: say something in a tone of gloating satisfaction

cursed: used to express annoyance or irritation

cussed: curse: profane or obscene expression usually of surprise or anger

cut across: be contrary to ordinary procedure or limitations

cut in: chime in: break into a conversation

D

debated: argue about (a subject), esp. in a formal manner.

decided: come to a resolution in the mind as a result of consideration.

declared: say something in a solemn and emphatic manner.

declined: politely refuse (an invitation or offer).

decreed: order (something) by decree (legal authority).

defended: resist an attack (verbal, in this case) made on (someone or something).

delivered: state in a formal manner.

demanded: ask authoritatively or brusquely.

demurred: raise doubts or objections or show reluctance.

denied: refuse to give or grant (something requested or desired) to (someone); state that one refuses to admit the truth or existence of.

denounced: publicly declare to be wrong or evil.

deplored: feel or express strong disapproval of (something).

described: give an account in words of (someone or something), including all the relevant characteristics, qualities, or events.

determined: ascertain or establish exactly, typically as a result of research or calculation.

dictated: say or read aloud (words to be typed, written down, or recorded on tape).

directed: control the operations of; manage or govern.

disagreed: have or express a different opinion.

disclaimed: refuse to acknowledge; deny.

disclosed: make (secret or new information) known.

discussed: talk about (something) with another person or group of people.

dissented: hold or express opinions that are at variance with those previously, commonly, or officially expressed.

divulged: make known (private or sensitive information).

drawled: speak in a slow, lazy way with prolonged vowel sounds.

droned: make a continuous low humming sound; speak in monotone.

E

echoed: (of a sound) be repeated or reverberate after the original sound has stopped; repeat. 

elaborated: develop or present (a theory, policy, or system) in detail.

emphasized: give special importance or prominence to (something) in speaking or writing.

enjoined: instruct or urge (someone) to do something.

entreated: ask someone earnestly or anxiously to do something.

enumerated: mention (a number of things) one by one.

enunciated: say or pronounce clearly.

equivocated: use ambiguous language so as to conceal the truth or avoid committing oneself.

estimated: roughly calculate or judge the value, number, quantity, or extent of.

exaggerated: represent (something) as being larger, greater, better, or worse than it really is.

exclaimed: cry out suddenly, esp. in surprise, anger, or pain.

exhorted: strongly encourage or urge (someone) to do something.

expatiated: speak or write at length or in detail.

explained: make (an idea, situation, or problem) clear to someone by describing it in more detail or revealing relevant facts or ideas.

exploded: speak in a loud, violent burst of noise.

expostulated: express strong disapproval or disagreement.

expounded: present and explain (a theory or idea) systematically and in detail.

expressed: convey (a thought or feeling) in words or by gestures and conduct.

extolled: praise enthusiastically.

F

faltered: speak in a hesitant or unsteady voice

fibbed: tell such a lie

foreswore: agree to give up or do without (something); swear falsely; commit perjury

foretold: predict (the future or a future event)

fretted: be constantly or visibly worried or anxious

fumed: feel, show, or express great anger

fussed: complain; worry

G

gabbed: talk, typically at length, about trivial matters.

gabbled: talk rapidly and unintelligibly; utter meaningless sounds.

gagged: choke or retch.

gainsaid: deny or contradict (a fact or statement).

gasped: inhale suddenly with the mouth open, out of pain or astonishment (typically used for single words or very short phrases).

giggled: laugh lightly in a nervous, affected, or silly manner.

gossiped: engage in casual or unconstrained conversation or reports about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as being true.

granted: admit something is true (used to introduce a factor that is opposed to the main line of argument but is not regarded as so strong as to invalidate it).

greeted: give a polite word or sign of welcome or recognition to (someone) on meeting.

griped: express a complaint or grumble about something, esp. something trivial.

groaned: make a deep inarticulate sound in response to pain or despair; complain.

groused: complain pettily; grumble.

growled: (of an animal, esp. a dog) make a low guttural sound of hostility in the throat.

grumbled: complain or protest about something in a bad-tempered but typically muted way.

grunted: (of an animal, esp. a pig) make a low, short guttural sound (usually of assent or pain) (typically used for single words or very short phrases).

guaranteed: provide a formal assurance or promise, esp. that certain conditions shall be fulfilled relating to a product, service, or transaction.

guessed: estimate or suppose (something) without sufficient information to be sure of being correct.

guffawed: laugh in a loud or boisterous way.

gurgled: make a hollow bubbling sound; speak indistinctly or with difficulty owing to water.

gushed: speak or write with effusiveness or exaggerated enthusiasm.

H

haggled: dispute or bargain persistently, esp. over the cost of something.

harped: talk or write persistently and tediously on a particular topic.

hastened to add: quickly say as a further remark; contribute (an enhancing quality).

hastened to say: quickly utter words so as to convey information, an opinion, a feeling or intention, or an instruction.

hedged: limit or qualify (something) by conditions or exceptions.

hemmed: skirt around a topic; avoid answering directly

hemmed and hawed: be evasive; to say “ah” and “eh” when speaking—avoiding saying something meaningful.

hinted: suggest or indicate something indirectly or covertly.

hissed: make a sharp sibilant sound as of the letter s; speak while overannuciating the letter s.

hollered: (of a person) give a loud shout or cry.

hooted: (of an owl) utter a hoot; speak while overannuciating the letter o.

howled: a long, loud, doleful cry uttered by an animal such as a dog or wolf. 

huffed: blow out loudly; puff; speak in a fit of petty annoyance.

I

imitated: take or follow as a model; copy (someone’s or something’s behavior, sound, appearance, etc.)

imparted: make (information) known; communicate.

implied: suggested but not directly expressed; implicit.

implored: beg someone earnestly or desperately to do something

imported: (archaic) indicate or signify.

impugned: dispute the truth, validity, or honesty of (a statement or motive); call into question.

indicated: point out; show; suggest as a desirable or necessary course of action.

inferred: deduce or conclude (information) from evidence and reasoning rather than from explicit statements.

informed: give (someone) facts or information; tell.

inquired: ask for information from someone.

insinuated: suggest or hint (something bad or reprehensible) in an indirect and unpleasant way.

insisted: demand something forcefully, not accepting refusal.

instructed: direct or command someone to do something, esp. as an official order.

insulted: speak to or treat with disrespect or scornful abuse.

interjected: say (something) abruptly, esp. as an aside or interruption.

interpreted: explain the meaning of (information, words, or actions).

interrogated: ask questions of (someone, esp. a suspect or a prisoner) closely, aggressively, or formally.

interrupted: stop (a person) in the midst of doing or saying something, especially by an interjected remark.

intimated: imply or hint.

intoned: say or recite with little rise and fall of the pitch of the voice.

introduced: make (someone) known by name to another in person, esp. formally.

J

jabbered: talk rapidly and excitedly but with little sense

jeered: make rude and mocking remarks, typically in a loud voice

jested: speak or act in a joking manner

joked: poke fun at; talk humorously or flippantly

joshed: tease (someone) in a playful way

judged: form an opinion or conclusion about

L

lamented: vocally expressing grief or sorrow or resembling such expression

laughed: make the spontaneous sounds and movements of the face and body that are the instinctive expressions of lively amusement and sometimes also of contempt or derision

lectured: talk seriously or reprovingly to (someone)

lied: tell a lie or lies

lisped: speak with a lisp

listed: the act of making a list of items

M

made known: announce some information generally; to disclose a secret

maintained: give one’s support to; uphold

marveled: speak as though filled with wonder or astonishment

mentioned: refer to something briefly and without going into detail

mimicked: imitate (someone or their actions or words), typically in order to entertain or ridicule

moaned: lament; complain or grumble, typically about something trivial; make a long, low sound expressing physical or mental suffering or sexual pleasure

mocked: tease or laugh at in a scornful or contemptuous manner

mouthed: say (something dull or unoriginal), esp. in a pompous or affected way

mumbled: say something indistinctly and quietly, making it difficult for others to hear

murmured: say something in a low, soft, or indistinct voice; say something cautiously and discreetly

mused: say to oneself in a thoughtful manner

muttered: say something in a low or barely audible voice, esp. in dissatisfaction or irritation; speak privately or unofficially about someone or something; spread rumors

N

nagged: annoy or irritate (a person) with persistent fault-finding or continuous urging

narrated: give a spoken or written account of

nodded: lower and raise one’s head slightly and briefly, esp. in greeting, assent, or understanding, or to give someone a signal

noted: noticed

notified: inform (someone) of something, typically in a formal or official manner

O

objected: say something to express one’s disapproval of or disagreement with something

observed: make a remark or comment

offered: present or proffer (something) for (someone) to accept or reject as so desired; express readiness or the intention to do something for or on behalf of someone

opposed: eager to prevent or put an end to; disapproving of or disagreeing with

orated: make a speech, esp. pompously or at length

ordered: give an authoritative direction or instruction to do something; command

P

panted: 

peeped: 

perceived: 

persisted: 

persuaded: 

pestered: 

petitioned: 

piped up: 

pleaded: 

pledged: 

pointed out: 

pondered: 

posed:��

pouted: 

praised: 

prattled on: 

prayed: 

preached: 

predicted: 

pressed: 

prevaricated: 

pried: 

proceeded: 

proclaimed: 

prodded: 

profaned: 

professed: 

promised: 

prompted: 

pronounced: 

prophesied: 

proposed: 

protested: 

purred: 

Q

quacked: talk loudly and foolishly

quarreled: have an angry argument or disagreement

quavered: (of a person’s voice) shake or tremble in speaking, typically through nervousness or emotion

queried: ask a question about something, esp. in order to express one’s doubts about it or to check its validity or accuracy

questioned: ask questions of (someone), esp. in an official context

quibbled: argue or raise objections about a trivial matter

quipped: make a witty remark

quoted: repeat a passage from (a work or author) or statement by (someone)

R

raged: 

railed: 

rambled: 

ranted: 

rapped: 

rattled off: 

raved: 

read: 

reasoned: 

rebuffed: 

recalled: 

recanted: 

recited: 

reckoned: 

recommended: 

reconciled: 

recorded: 

recounted: 

recriminated: 

referred: 

refused: 

refuted: 

reiterated: 

related: 

remarked: 

remonstrated: 

reneged: 

renounced: 

repeated: 

repined: 

replied: 

reported: 

reputed: 

requested: 

responded: 

restated: 

retorted: 

retracted: 

roared: 

S

said: utter words so as to convey information, an opinion, a feeling or intention, or an instruction.

sang: 

scoffed: 

scolded: 

screamed: 

screeched: 

shouted: 

shrieked: 

sighed: 

slurred:  

snapped: 

snarled: 

sneered: 

snickered: 

sniggered: 

snipped: 

sniveled: 

sobbed: 

sounded: 

spat: 

spouted: 

sputtered: 

squawked: 

squeaked: 

stammered: 

stated: 

suggested: 

swore: 

T

taunted: provoke or challenge (someone) with insulting remarks

teased: make fun of or attempt to provoke (a person or animal) in a playful way; tempt

thanked: express gratitude to (someone), esp. by saying “Thank you”

thought aloud: speak one’s thoughts audibly

told: communicate information, facts, or news to someone in spoken or written words; order, instruct, or advise (someone) to do something

trumpeted: proclaim widely or loudly 

tutted: utter `tsk,’ `tut,’ or `tut-tut,’ as in disapproval

twanged: make or cause to make such a sound

twittered: talk in a light, high-pitched voice; talk rapidly and at length in an idle or trivial way

U

urged: try earnestly or persistently to persuade (someone) to do something

uttered: say (something) aloud

V

validated: make or declare legally valid

ventured: dare to do or say something that may be considered audacious (often used as a polite expression of hesitation or apology)

verbalized: express (ideas or feelings) in words, esp. by speaking out loud

verified: make sure or demonstrate that (something) is true, accurate, or justified

vocalized: utter (a sound or word); express with words

voiced: express (something) in words

vowed: solemnly promise to do a specified thing

W

wailed: give such a cry of pain, grief, or anger

warbled: sing in a trilling or quavering voice

warned: give someone forceful or cautionary advice about their actions or conduct; inform someone in advance of an impending or possible danger, problem, or other unpleasant situation

whimpered: say something in a low, feeble voice expressive of such emotions; make a series of low, feeble sounds expressive of fear, pain, or discontent

whined: give or make a long, high-pitched complaining cry or sound; complain in a feeble or petulant way

whispered: speak very softly using one’s breath without one’s vocal cords, esp. for the sake of privacy

whooped: give or make a whoop 

winked: close and open one eye quickly, typically to indicate that something is a joke or a secret or as a signal of affection or greeting

withdrew: take back or away (something bestowed, proposed, or used)

Y

yakked: talk at length about trivial or boring subjects

yammered: talk volubly

yapped: talk at length in an irritating manner

yawped: slang. to talk noisily and foolishly or complainingly

yelled: give a loud, sharp cry; shouted

yowled: make such a cry

[jedi-mattdecker-blog]

He couldn’t believe that she was standing before him. Maybe it was the nostalgia of the past or the regret of what could have been, but Cynthia had always been someone he had believed made him into a different person. Perhaps it was for the better, but he would never fully know and it was the reason that he had desired to have such a connection with her. Hell, when the two of them started talking he picked up a pen and paper and wrote her letters. For the first few months, he ended up writing her lengthy letters in how he wasn’t sad that they had stopped talking, but that they allowed their friendship to diminish. He never blamed himself and he never blamed Cynthia – it was just the way of the world.

After a while, keeping the letters was too much so he had started a journal for her. Matt had never been one for journals, or even trying to keep a connection towards someone who wasn’t around anymore. He had always been a man to let things go as they left because otherwise you were pining for a life that wouldn’t happen. With her it was different and it made him feel selfish for wanting to keep her to himself; she had opened his eyes towards a different kind of life (surely, it was one without coffee and tea instead, but he wouldn’t have mind that if it was with her) and he had wondered how things would have differed if they were at a different time, in a different setting. Maybe things would have been different and he wouldn’t have say that she was the one that got away.

A small chuckle escaped from his lips as the color pink brushed against her cheeks and he felt that even though he had been up for days, he was energized. Just standing next to her allowed that kind of energy to be evoked from him and he remembered what it was like to crave to be next to her. Sure, the two of them were never together in means of a romantic relationship, but he had spent a long time trying to forget her and he never quite did. Maybe that was the reason why things hadn’t worked out with Molly – because he was still attached the woman who smelled sweetly of the forest and was as warm as the cup of tea nestled into her hands. He missed her, surely he knew this.

“I don’t look too bad? I looked at myself in the mirror today and went, ‘Well, shit. You used to look like a stud but now you look like a tired stud.’” A grin danced upon his lips as he shrugged his shoulders a bit. It was always business that had made him travel, but he had also desired to see what around him because that’s what the younger version of him would have done. Matt would have ditched the meetings, or at least cut them short, and spend several days finding himself in the bustling city. Except he had grown up. Changed. “Oh, you know. I came here because I have a suit fetish and love seeing everyone hustle and bustle around with their phones stuck to their head.” He chuckled once again. “Meeting, people are trying to buy me. I’ve actually grown a lot – business wise – in the past year. Who would’ve thought, right?”

But I missed you too. He had just nodded slowly as his grin fading into a smaller, slightly sad, smile. Swallowing the knot that had formed in his throat, blue eyes flickered back towards Cynthia. “I would love nothing more than to walk with you, Cynthia. And no, I’m free for the night. Elysse is out and about being a tourist because I know she was excited to come here. I’m all yours.” Striding forward with her on his side, he couldn’t have asked for a better day. The first few months after the two had started talking, he had wondered what it would be like to be next to her again and this – this was glorious. Fantastic.

Simple.

“Catch me up on your life. Don’t leave a detail out – are you still working in a bookstore? How’s Brandy doing?” Pausing, he lets out a chuckle. “Do you ever look a duck and think ‘I wonder how Surrey is doing?’ He’s doing fine, by the way. Grown up a lot.”

Beside me, today / Matt and Cynthia

"That’s me," she said softly as she gave an awkward wave of the hands. Hearing her father’s name spoken out loud felt a bit weird. It was a joke between them; Cynthia could remember. However, having her father’s name mentioned was something she liked to avoid. A part of her even regretted ever having told him. This summer would mark the fourth year in which she hadn’t seen or spoken to her father, and hearing his name brought up feelings and emotions she’d rather not deal with. She hid them well, however, behind a gentle smile and a blush of the cheeks. "It’s good to see you," she said. She wondered where he’d been this past year. Many things had changed for her; she’d moved to Brooklyn and settled into a routine. She’d started working with a theatre company and became busy. She supposed he had become busy, too, otherwise they’d stayed in touch.

When he called her beautiful, her eyes went to the sea. She would never get used to being called beautiful and it always evoked a blush. She had someone that told her nearly every day, but Cynthia wasn’t one to flaunt her appearance. She preferred being known and appreciated for what she contributed on an intellectual level rather than her looks. At times it felt nice, admittedly. “Thanks,” she said finally. She wanted him to know that she was appreciative of his compliment, even though she didn’t quite know what to do with it. She hoped he remembered that she was naturally awkward. Cynthia had never focused on her appearance much. She liked to look pretty, but her own definition of pretty was different from everyone else’s. The redhead liked to wear the old fashioned clothes, the comfortable and used. She refused make up and she didn’t believe in hair brushes very much. She hated to do her nails and kept them short. She wasn’t the typical twenty first century girl. She was somewhat alternative. To be complimented on her own ways of beauty made her feel happy, despite the fact that she felt awkward about it. Coming from Matt, it meant a lot.

"You don’t look too bad," she said with a playful smile. He didn’t look bad at all. She saw the fatigue in his features. She recognized the shadows of exhaustion and the wrinkles around his eyes. She wondered what kept him up. Didn’t he have Elysse to make sure he was keeping the schedule? Wasn’t sleep a part of the schedule? She made a mental note to remind him to get some sleep tonight. She would make him promise. "What’s bringing you to New York? It can’t be the buzz or the sights, surely!" Cynthia remembered he was a traveler, but not like herself. He traveled for work. She traveled for the adventure. Those were two very different kinds of travel. He wore a suit. His hair was neatly put into place. Cynthia supposed he just came out of a meeting.

"It’s a little out of bounds," she laughed gently. "But I missed you too." It was not his fault that they had lost touch, nor was it hers. Somewhere between work and life the strings were cut and life happened. They didn’t owe it to each other to stay in touch. They were no longer connected by a location or a relationship. Memories, they were. Fond memories, but memories nonetheless. The feeling, however, remained the same. Hearing his voice took her back to the Chinese restaurant where they had had their first date. She hadn’t been on a date since. There was something between her and the French boy, but she wouldn’t think of it as dates just yet.

"Do you have plans?" Cynthia inquired "I mean, would you like to walk a bit?" Walking seemed a lot more comfortable than standing in one place. She could tell by the way he shoved his hands into his pockets that they weren’t in the most comfortable place but she hoped that’d change after a bit of warm-hearted conversations.

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Plot Bunny: 01, Party Girl Rock

In the first year of collage at UC Berkeley Matt has decided to let loose just as he did in his high school years. Being far away from home and pledging into a fraternity, he's bound to have a drunken hook up a couple of times. Girl comes in as one of the pledges from a sorority and one of the rules for them is to not hook up with anybody in his fraternity at this part. On the other hand, Matt's frat had decided that whomever can hook up with a girl from the Girl's sorority, they would skip the hazing and go into being a full fledged member. As such, the two of them find each other and find that they seem to have chemistry. Matty's goofy, loud, and obnoxious with a face that catches girls attentions. The two of them are already pretty drunk, but they're having an intense/deep conversation about something and they end up hooking up that night. 

Girl is begs Matt not to say anything and he agrees not to because he likes her. She leaves and that day it is announced to the frat that the only guy who successfully hooked up with the sorority was Matt and the word goes out (A frat brother saw him sneak into the room with Girl). 

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A heavy sigh rolled from his chest as the droning went on and on, his attention not thoroughly in the meeting. Often times this happened to him, especially during the busier times such as spring and summer where he spent most of his days travelling from England to Tokyo and then back to the States. ‘We know that you have invested in a few malls in Los Angeles and San Deigo…’ Nodding his head as if he were paying attention, he pressed his lips together and kept his eyes on the man whose mouth was moving. ‘We would like the opportunity for you create one here. We’ve acquired a few older housing units and the space…’

Matt’s mind wandered off towards home and his friends he had to say goodbye to – the woman he thought would stand beside him for all eternity. Molly Zaleski, he was sure of it, was the one who wouldn’t leave and yet she did. The distance, she said. The travelling, it’s too hard. It was something like that, was it not? It had only happened a month or two ago and he had forgotten about it all – partly because he had been so busy travelling and planning and partly because he didn’t want to know the pain anymore.

‘We understand that you have a few businesses here and we would like to extend you the offer of also becoming the CEO of the mall, Mister Decker.’ Light blue eyes flicked towards the man and away from his thoughts, his brow raising slightly as he leaned back into his chair. Eyes were settled upon him, the air thick with anticipation of what his next few words where that it was almost sickening. “I’ll think about it.” Attempting to stifle a laugh as a look of shocked faces bounced quickly on their faces, Matt waved his hands in the air.

“Surely you could not have thought that I would come to a decision today? I run a business, Mr. Norretlarn, and I understand that you do too. But you need me and I have a hell of a lot of companies out there that want me, too. To my understanding, you’re drowning. This is an act of desperation because I came to you several years ago when I first picked up my father’s company and you refused. I’ve expanded, Dave Decker is not only an architectural firm, but we pride ourselves to be a global business firm as well.”

Standing up, he pressed his suit down as his secretary stood up also. “I will be contacting you within three to five business days, if you have any more information you would like to provide me please contact Miss Rosario here. The phone number on my business card will take you directly to Miss Rosario’s cell phone. Thank you for your time, I’ll speak to you soon.”

Turning his body away from them, he made his way out of the small office and out towards Manhattan. A low groan left his lips as he turned towards Elysse, who was frantically looking for an item in her bag. “It’s fine, Elysse. Take the rest of the day off, we both need it. We’ve been in and out of meetings the past few weeks and hey – you’re in New York. Go sightseeing.” The girl raised a brow but didn’t question him, nodding her head and turning away from him.

“Me time,” he murmured as he walked towards the nearest park, his eyes closing together. It was uncanny how much he had fit in this city – the dark circles that he sported under his eyes, the briefcase in his hand and the well-pressed suit he wore. Hair slicked back because mornings were spent making sure there was coffee in his system rather than grooming – yet his face was clean cut without the shadow that most men wore. The hustle and bustle of the city wore him out and all he had wanted was some peace and quiet – and as such, he sat down on a bench overlooking the water and allowed himself to doze off.

Hearing the footsteps of someone approaching him, he let out a small yawn before opening his eyes towards her, Cynthia May, and his mouth stayed open as his brows raised. Shaking his head, he stood up and stared at her for a few moments, a look of confusion appearing on his face. “Cynthia May of Richard May!” A gleeful grin spread upon his lips as it almost always did when he was around her. She looked the same as he last saw her – a serene simplistic beauty with a warm smile that radiated through her body.

This small part of him wanted to reach out and touch her face to ask her ‘Are you real?’ but he fought the urge to do so. “Still so beautiful, I see. Excuse my wreck of a face, I haven’t slept in three days.” A light laugh escaped from his lips as blue eyes met hers, not wanting to let go. “You’re…” Pausing, he pulls his gaze away from her before turning towards the water and shoving his hands in his pocket. “Is it out of bounds for me to say that I’ve missed you?”

Beside me, today / Matt and Cynthia

There were days that Cynthia enjoyed thoroughly. These days usually started with an hour or two of yoga and then continued with practices equally relaxing. Some might assume that’s all there was to an artis’s life, but Cynthia begged to differ. These slow and relaxing days were rare in the professional life of Cynthia May. When she wasn’t working at the bookshop or taking her time to be in the outside in the nature, she was rushing from one rehearsal to the next. She’d be studiyng plays and monologues and read Shakespeare. Next week she’d participate in a Meisner workshop. The craft wanted to be polished. One step away from mediocrity at at time. One couldn’t forget the ground, however, and to stay firmly planted on the earth, Cynthia took her time to be out. Even on the most exhausting of days she’d take her time to walk the few blocks to the waterfront and watch the sun set over Staten Island. It was around six o’clock when she left the theatre. In the midst of rush-hour she felt a little bit lost. Between steel canyons and the noise of honking and breaking, she felt small. Once she reached Battery Park she allowed herself to relax. She could still hear the city behind her and see the smog that hovered above it. Here by the water she felt the breeze on her skin and the last bit of sun and decided to focus on it. By the time she crossed the bridge over to Brooklyn, the sun would be down. It was a daily routine that she’s grown very fond of.

Cynthia didn’t mind walking; she never had. She didn’t understand why anyone would take their car into the city, or even the taxi. Contributing to traffic jams and global warming was something she didn’t want to do anyway. She’d be faster walking, or taking the bike sometimes. Her hand touched the railing as she walked by the water. Below she could see the waves as they crashed against the concrete. She could hear them too. She observed the people that passed her. Cynthia thought of them as movies of daily life. They inspired her to write and to be better. It was a strange concept but it made sense to the redhead. Strangers were fascinating. They could be anything and anyone. She never saw the same stranger twice; she would never know if the boy with the glasses she’d seen three days ago was a superhero in disguise, or if the fabulously looking lady from yesterday was actually very sad. Cynthia was curious about these things.

The young woman found herself a sun-warmed bench. At times she would enjoy a little moment sitting still. Walking gave her a chance to turn off her mind and focus on everything that was around her. Sitting by the water gave her a chance to collect the thoughts and put them into perspective. Watching the sun over the horizon and knowing that she could drive a thousand miles west and not catch up with it made her feel humble. The feeling put a smile on her lips as she thought of the coming autumn. She would buy a bus ticket and go to the other end of the continent via Greyhound. She’d take the long route, stopping here and there to meet the most unlikely people in the most unlikely places. It was an adventure she was looking forward to. Life, Cynthia thought, could be beatiful. The stress of work and the busy city sometimes made her forget the simple beauty of it. Burdened by the problems of this society she often felt sad. Often she lost all faith in humanity. There was so much she wanted to change, so much she wanted the world to do differently. Sitting by the water allowed her to calm down. She needed to calm down and realize that right now, she was okay.

She was okay. The elderly next to her seemed to be okay. The child with the ice cream cone seemed more than okay. The business man seemed okay, and — “Matt?” She said his name to herself rather than him. She was too far for him to hear anyway and she took a moment to inspect her familiar old friend to make sure it was really him. It has been a year, since they’d last spoken but Cynthia never forgot a friend, especially not one like Matt has been. They’d been a little more than friends; not quite lovers but almost. And she’d not forget him even though they’ve grown apart over the year. She didn’t know how it happened, either. Cynthia supposed that life has gotten in between. She became busy with work and she thought so did he. She thought of him at times. When she saw a man in a suit she’d think of him, or when she watched a group of ducks by the water. They’ve not parted on bad terms, which made it easy for her to approach him. “Matthew Decker of Dave Decker, it really is you.” She was closer now, within hearing range. She smiled shyly and gave a wave, hoping that he’d not mind her invading his personal space like this.

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Public Announcement --

Hi! I'm Karen and Matty here was part of an amazing roleplay called iRoleplay for about two years, give or take. Sadly, the place is closed and now with summer on board I'd like to start roleplaying once again -- as such, from this point forward, Matthew Decker is going to be a 1x1 roleplay and everything below things was during his era in iRoleplay. Now, I don't know exactly how these things go, so I'm kind of winging it -- just let me know if you'd like to plot something with me (whether you were part of the old group or seem to have stumbled upon this, I'd love to plot!)! I'll be revamping this page around, as well as adding an account to matty's here that I guess serves as the "main" page (I'm not too sure, I'm still reading around the 1x1 roleplay rules. That being said if you have any tips/pointers, please let me know). 

xoxo gg

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R U ALIVE? I R ALIVE. Where has everyone flocked to????

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Merry Late X-Mas xoxo gg

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Sext @ Matthew

Jackson: I saw the video!!!

Jackson: JK grace loves me and idk?

Matthew: WHAT SHUT UP

Matthew: I hope you took a video of the video

Matthew: ... JK? JK???????? CRUEL

Matthew: She what?? Isn't that a good thing??? Grace loves you... that's something to celebrate?? What's wrong??

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Drive - The Cars

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Stay Still || Molly & Matt

Frustration was starting to crawl under his skin, and he was sure it was showing with the way he was carrying himself. Matt didn't want it to end up like this, it was his last intention but he knew he had to tell Molly about the night between Taryn and him - it slipped her mind when he first told her he wanted to be with her. And he did. Without the secrets. It was the reason he brought up the subject in the first place, telling her to that he needed to talk to her after waiting up (yet again) for her to come back from work. To be honest, he was exhausted because Elysse still wasn't at a hundred percent, so he was pretty much playing CEO by himself (at least with her, the load wasn't all on him).

"Look, Molls, just -..." Cutting himself off, he huffed out an aggravated sigh as he shook his head. His brows knit forward as he sat down himself down on the couch. "I know I should've told you about Taryn sooner, but I told you at first. And yeah, I know I screwed up because I didn't tell you again right away when we got together but... Molly, I missed you and I missed us... and this is getting difficult, but there is no way I'm going back to being 'just friends' with you, which is why I'm bringing it up. It was one night, we were drunk, it was her birthday. It meant nothing, really, it kinda just..." Biting down on his lip, he averted his eyes from her to stare at the ground. "I realized, waking up the next morning, that it should've been you and not her. And I-- I'm sorry.

"And I know, I need to stop saying that but..." Blowing out air from his mouth once again, he lulled his head backwards with his eyes closed, refusing to meet her gaze. Because she would give him that hurt look, because... well, honestly, right now, he didn't know how Molly was going to react to the news. Would that hurt be anger? Would she resent him? Want to break up with him? He could understand that, really, because it was basically him sleeping with her best friend, his ex-fiance, and then realizing that he fucked up, that he was with the wrong person. How can you justify that? He thought with his dick? Because it's true, but right now... he didn't want to lose this. He didn't want to lose her. "Molly, say something, please."

Her silence was roaring.

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Acceptance || Self-Para

"You don't get to tell me how I feel." With his jaw clenched and his lips pressed firmly together, his eyes averted hers as his head slowly moved to the side. Memories of raising her children and being with her husband, who was no longer here, filled every inch of space. Her house was much like a scrapbook of her children growing up - medals, school work, art pieces and pictures were scattered in a disarrayed manner, yet was somehow organized to the point where every room was pretty much a year with all the physical evidence of her children. To him, it was the reminder that he had grown up in a way that was often ignored by his parents - among the trinkets and pictures that graced the wall, there were hardly any of his - his brothers and sisters often make fun of him for it, but to this day it was a resentment he carried with him. Why'd he have to be the middle child? While everyone else was being smothered by his parents, he was left to play house with the Romans (and to this day, he still considered them family because they had seen him grow up - more so than his own parents, he thought).

"Matthew Edward Decker, you are being an unreasonable, stubborn, hard-headed child right now." The stern loudness in her voice was hardly heard by his ears, as he was often spared a scolding from his mother due to the fact that she was always busy with someone else. Whereas most people saw it as a good thing, growing up Matt hated the fact that no one cared enough to give him a proper chewing out. "I understand you don't like coming here, son, because I was apparently a bad mother, as you said... but don't you understand? I was raising so many of you, my hands were always full. I just - I don't know what to say to you. I don't love you any less than I did them, I love you just as much... I always have, and I always will." Taking in a deep breath, he shook his head quietly as her words bounced in his head.

For the longest time, he had always avoided this topic only because it made him look like an ungrateful child. Growing up, he had everything he could ever need - a roof over his head, food on his plate, lunches to take the school, school supplies, clothes (though most of the times, they were hand-me-downs by his brothers), and shoes on his feet. As an adult, he knew that he was thankful to his parents for providing him with that, but it didn't erase the fact that during his childhood, most of his time was with his second family - The Romans - and the two of them hardly even noticed. There is not forgetting how lonely he felt during Christmases where his mother gave him money because getting him a gift slipped her mind, or how he felt underappreciated because he had cleaned the bathroom and it went unnoticed, but when his brother did so he was praised and given a raise for his allowance. It's impossible for him to forget that and he had told his mother, repeatedly, that he loved her but he also resented her for his seemingly shitty and neglected childhood.

"Mom, stop, don't get angry. Can we just drop it? I told you I didn't want to talk about it," Matt said tiredly as his hands moved to rub his eyes. The whole subject was sore to him and every time his mother brought it up, he just wanted to get up and walk out of the house to spare her the guilt. He didn't want her to feel guilty, and he definitely didn't want her smothering him in an attempt to remedy the lost years. "I just want to move forward from the past," he admitted slowly as he moved towards the chair, sitting himself down. Taking in a breath, his eyes moved to meet hers and he then (again) realized it was so much like his own, that it was as if the Universe had copied her eyes and pasted it onto him. "I do love you, mom, I really do. I'm happy I grew up in this family and I didn't turn out half bad. I have a girlfriend, own dad's company, and... Well, yeah, it sucked when I was a kid but I'm okay now.

"Sure, I do hold a slight resentment towards you and dad, but I don't think I'll ever let it go, okay? It's always going to be there because it's not like you can Click a remote and rewind time to relive my childhood so that you could do it right. I came out alright, even with you forgetting my birthdays, and forgetting me on Christmas. It sucked when I was a kid, yeah, I think I even hated you at one point... but mom, you're alright, okay? I love you. I love dad, I miss him just as much as you do because... well, all I did in his lifetime was disappoint  him. And don't tell me I didn't, mom, you keep saying that but I did. I disappointed him because he knew I could be better and he knew that there was this worthy... man inside of me. And I love him for that, I love you for telling him I am, too.

"I ended up okay, mom. I mean, I'm still a pretty fucked up person but that's not your fault, that's my own because I belittled myself so much when I was in college and when Taryn left and... Well, it doesn't matter alright? The past is the past. What happened, happened and I know you feel bad, and I feel bad for making you feel bad... But mom, look at where I am now. Successfully running dad's company. When I was a kid, I didn't think that could happen, but it's happening. I'm happy right now, I have a girlfriend who I want to work out everything with... Like, I don't know mom, she's beautiful and funny and caring and a little crazy, but she's great. More than great and I don't know. Maybe my shitty childhood happened to lead to me to the point where I am now, and I can't thank you enough for that. I'll still... you know, wish I had a better one but I don't want to change who I am now. Molly is wonderful, I'm here all the time seeing you and it doesn't make up for the past, but it's building a better future. I love you, okay, mom? I love you, so stop feeling bad, and stop smothering me in an attempt to fix everything... Just, be my mom. Don't try too hard, you're overcompensating and... Mom just, just calm down. I love you."