jbonesy

[jbonesy]

Music of 2018

Top 10 Albums (No Particular Order)

Death Grips - Year of the Snitch

Even though it’s had some time to settle, I’m still not 100% sure where to place this album in Death Grips’s discography. Regardless, Death Grips continues to reinvent themselves more and more with every continuous album, and continues moreso to be more unpredictable than ever. The departure from their earlier hip hop sound and more toward experimental punk and rock suits them better than ever. While I’m a bit shaky on the predictability of the sound of some songs (Flies & Streaky notably), the songs of which do fall flat, I absolutely love the direction the majority of the album trends toward - songs like Death Grips is Online, Black Paint, and Dilemma perfectly embody the direction I’d hoped they’d go into after The Powers That B. Meanwhile, songs like The Fear and Little Richard continue to be as odd as ever - in the best way possible. My one complaint is that I’d wished they’d have departed a bit more from the predictable hip hop songs I’d mentioned above, but overall, the rest of the album is so great it’s hard to complain. 

Car Seat Headrest - Twin Fantasy (Rerecording/Remaster)

Car Seat Headrest’s original Twin Fantasy is a kind of cult classic bandcamp album which garnered a lot of notoriety, so the 2018 reissue garnering just as much should be a surprise to no one. While it’s true that the original rough quality added to the charm and in the re-recording process certain elements of the original don’t have the same effect, the strengths of the album shine through regardless. What can I say about this album that hasn’t already been said? This is the best indie rock album about depressed gay furries on tumblr I’ve ever heard.

Teyana Taylor - K.T.S.E

The Kanye Wyoming sessions were definitely a spectacle at the time, and because of all the chaos surrounding the releases, and the incredible amount of hype that was generated during the time, KTSE was unfairly overshadowed by a lot of the other albums that came out at the end - and it being the last to release, further mucked by delays and technical problems, didn’t help its case. Listening to the album in full though, it’s pretty sad this was the case, but in my opinion it’s the best album to come out of the Wyoming sessions. It’s an amazing call back to Kanye’s ability to still sample soul, and some of the instrumentals took me right back to the early 2000s, like a time machine. Teyana Taylor might not be the strongest voice in R&B or the most well known, but her performance alongside these instrumentals is definitely something to be lauded. In addition, Gonna Love Me is one of my favorite songs of 2018.

IDLES - Joy as an Act of Resistance.

While I have to admit I’m not as hot on some of the social critiques this album delivers in its music, its done in a way that I can definitely appreciate it. That said, the music on this stuff itself is some of the best punk I’ve heard in forever - maybe this decade. There’s some points of contention in the bluntly direct, sometimes annoying lyrics , but overall, a lot of the politics can probably be seen as a callback to the roots of punk with a modern spin. That said, the instrumentation and vocal performances on this thing are great. As a punk fan at heart I have to say this if there’s one punk or rock album you listen to this year, it should probably be this one. It’s amazing.

Parquet Courts - Wide Awaaaaake!

Continuing on from the last entry above, Parquet Courts smashed it earlier in the year with this post-punk revival album. While post-punk may continue to be influential to a lot of artists, I admittedly haven’t heard a lot of straight up post-punk revivalism, especially not as enjoyable as this, in a long time. While the themes of the album are honestly pretty similar to the above album as well, this is probably the closest you’re gonna get to a Talking Heads or Joy Division album in 2018 - and damn is it good.

Hermit and the Recluse (Ka & Animoss) - Orpheus vs. the Sirens

Two darlings of the real hip hop underground link up for one of the best hip hop albums of the year - and probably the best written. Ka continues to push for his well deserved title of one of the best lyricists to ever enter the genre - which is near insane given his very underground status. A lot of the instrumentals on this thing perfectly suit Ka’s style - lots of looping, eclectic beats, with a hint of eeriness or vintage shine. There’s some soul-like samples mixed in as well for good measure, something I’d never complain about on a hip hop album. Ka’s writing is arguably some of the best in his career as well - which given his portfolio up until this point, is really saying something. His densely layered, metaphor and thematically driven calls to mythology and poetically-inspired style of rapping are the perfect complement to the instrumentals over this album.

J.I.D - DiCaprio 2

J.I.D is one of my favorite newcomers in hip hop, and definitely one of the acts in the genre I’m hopeful for the future - not that this is an uncommon opinion. At this point, he’s got cosigns in coming from every direction - enough that people are already calling him overrated - and he hasn’t even really gotten started yet. The Never Story was an interesting debut album when it came out last year - a case study in an eclectic hip hop album that manages to encapsulate much of the modern trends in the genre while also incorporating some fantastic rapping and some oddly enchanting music choices. DiCaprio 2 - in J.I.D’s own words - is not his magnum opus, or his GKMC - an album comparison common in those already comparing him to a young Kendrick Lamar (despite JID being almost 30, surprisingly). However, despite that, this is a fantastic album regardless; the rapping is some of the best of any newcomer to the genre. There’s punchlines and flows that make callbacks to Lil Wayne, and technical skill to match many currently lauded acts. It’s a great mix of technicality, fun, and skill. While not every song is perfect - Tiiied and Westbrook were a bit underwhelming in my opinion - when this album reaches highs, it reaches REALLY high. Songs like Off Da Zoinkys, Skrawberries, and Despacito Too to name a few are hints that J.I.D isn’t going anywhere anytime soon, and I’m certainly excited for his future.

MGMT - Little Dark Age

A lot of what I’ve heard from MGMT has been hit or miss for me, but their synth heavy album from earlier in the year is one of those times where when they hit with me, they really seem to hit heavy. The psychedelic vibes on this album are pretty entrancing, and while I can see the vocals as being love or hate, personally I’m a great fan of them on most of the songs. There’s a few low points where they feel a bit robotic - perhaps on purpose - but outside of those few grating moments, the album’s highs are too high for me to ignore otherwise. Mark it up as a win for psychedelic pop.

Pusha T - Daytona

As I said earlier, Kanye’s Wyoming sessions were one of the biggest music spectacles this year, especially for those in the hip hop genre. Combined with the massive hype circling Pusha T’s supposed release of King Push - an album up there with Detox and Doomstarks in probably never coming out - most hip hop fans were posted up for hours each night in anticipation of what would actually release (and what wouldn’t). While I can’t say I enjoyed this as much as KTSE, it’s still a great album regardless. The instrumentals are gritty and tight - there’s no room for mistakes, and there’s rarely any lows. Pusha raps as great as always, minus some slip ups with some poor or awkward lines. Overall, it’s a great album, but it’s short nature and lack of experimentation or boundary pushing leave a bit to be desired. Kanye’s fantastic production shines more than Pusha does at times - which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it never feels like Push really leaves his comfort zone; especially after hearing songs in the past like Lunch Money, it makes me wish he did. Regardless, I can’t really thrash this album; it’s a perfectly compressed hip hop album, and one of the best of the year.  

Blood Orange - Negro Swan

Devonte Hynes, better known as Blood Orange, is one of those musicians I’m suprised we don’t hear more about. I have to admit - his voice can be a bit grating at times - but overall, it’s one of those albums whose highs far overshadow subjective lows like that. The instrumentation is varied and lush; overall, Hyne’s production is some of the best its ever been. There’s a nice dip in pop, r&b, hip hop, funk, and other genres throughout the album. While I may have said his voice can be grating at times, I will say when it works - it works. Songs like Charcoal Baby are great examples of his voice working in tandem beautifully with his instrumentals. There’s some great vocal performances on this, and again, I think there’s some amazing production. It’s also more impressive when you realize Hynes alone produced the vast majority of this album, along with singing on basically all the songs. Other complaints? I do wish he brought back Despot because Clipped On from Cupid Deluxe. is an amazing song.

Honorable Mentions / Albums I Found Interesting but not Amazing

Lil Peep - Come Over When You’re Sober Pt. 2

COWYS2 isn’t a perfect album. None of Lil Peep’s albums are perfect - his music has largely remained controversial; it seems to piss off both rock and hip hop fans.There’s a lot of complaints I’ve seen about this album - “it’s overproduced” seems to be the biggest one. Is it? Maybe. But man, this album appeals to my love of emo music like no album has in a long time. His writing might not the best, and the instrumentals might be a bit weak at times, but overall, as a posthumous album, you can only complain so much. It’s not perfect, but neither have any of his other albums been. For what it is - a mix of hip hop and early 2000s pop punk and emo - it’s great as it is. Runaway is one of my favorite songs of the year.

Lil Peep - Goth Angel Sinner EP (Unofficial Leak)

I was debating if I should include this at all since it’s technically unofficial, but given I included COWYS, I figured it was worth it. Peep’s death was an untimely shock, and while his music might not have always been the best, I think his interesting blend of music and notably recognizable voice was something he’ll be remembered for regardless. He was growing in his sound, moving away from hip hop and more into that musical sphere of punk and emo - and GAS is a sad hint at what could have been. It’s some of his best music by a wide margin, and it’s profoundly depressing that we’ll never see him at his true potential. RIP Peep.

Kids See Ghosts - Kids See Ghosts

One of the hipster darling albums of the year, I wasn’t as impressed as everyone else. It’s not bad by any means, but I didn’t think it was amazing. There are some great points the album - the production is pretty good throughout, and Cudi and Kanye both deliver some great performances, but overall, I feel like it fell a bit short. The 7 song length didn’t help either; unlike Daytona, it doesn’t feel as tight, and sometimes it sounds more muddy than anything. Cudi’s vocals can be a bit lazy at times as well, and some of the insistent repetition on the songs doesn’t work well in an album so incredibly short to begin with. All that said, it’s a good album - I don’t want to disparage it too much. It has some of Kanye’s best rapping in ages (regardless of whether he wrote it), and it’s a fun listen. Kids See Ghosts and Cudi Montage are my favorite songs. 

Earl Sweatshirt - Some Rap Songs

Some Rap Songs is an album I’ve gone back and forth on quite a lot, which is impressive considering it’s barely been out as of writing this. It’s a short album, so I’ve managed to listen a few times, but even so, I’m torn on a lot of it. Earl’s writing is good, and some of the production is eclectic and interesting, but there are times the album dips in severe quality. Regardless of if it was intentional, the muddy (if not straight poor) mixing, lofi recording quality, and lack of variation are some of the few complaints I have on the album. It feels incredibly lazy at times - whether on purpose or not is a different question - but whether it “works” isn’t. There are some songs I do really like - I think Peanut and The Mint are some of the more interesting cuts, but songs like Nowhere2Go among others feel unimpressive, if not falling flat completely. If anything else, it’s an interesting listen, and especially emotional for those already fans of Earl.

Frank Ocean - ENDLESS (2018 Remaster/Reissue)

Frank Ocean is one of those artists who deserves the vast majority of his widespread acclaim. While his less than ideal music release schedule and mysterious public persona (or lack thereof) certainly play into that, his music really is what takes the trophy at the end of the day. When Endless originally released, Blonde definitely overshadowed it (and for good reason), but on its own, Endless still shines bright. The 2018 reissue adds a few new points to the album as well, which overall manage to improve it to a great degree. I was considering placing it in my top 10, but it felt unfair considering this album didn’t “really” come out in 2018, and the changes aren’t big enough to warrant considering it a new album. Still though, it deserved a mention.

Kero Kero Bonito - Time ‘n’ Place

I’m still a bit disappointed at KKB’s artistic choice to change their image and focus - it feels a bit cheap and insulting to some of their audience - but I can’t really disparage their music. While their artistic and musical growth seems more artificial and inorganic than anything, at the end of the day, it’s still growth. On its own, Time ‘n’ Place is a good album. It’s a good mix of their own brand of fun, experimentation, and genre hopping. While the pop fans they courted with their debut might still be disappointed, I did enjoy the album quite a lot, even if the aesthetic felt a bit annoying and - again - artificial. Taken on its own in isolation though, again, it’s a good album.

Anderson .Paak - Oxnard

There’s not a ton I can really say about Oxnard. It’s a good album. There’s a few points in which it falls flat, but even then, it’s not really bad. Okay, maybe except for the last song, which feels completely out of place. It’s no Malibu, no Yes Lawd!, and no Venice, but it’s a good album. Paak’s talent shines through no matter what. Dr. Dre’s influence really does shine through on this album though - it’s very reminiscent of some of Compton to me. I can see hardcore fans of Malibu or Yes Lawd not really liking this album, but the exploration of hip hop and funk more than r&b and soul really do suit Paak during a lot of this album. I say this as a massive fan of Malibu as well - it was one of my favorite albums of the year it came out. He’s branching out and experimenting, and it’s not a bad thing - especially when you look at his entire musical history. It’s worth checking out.

Leon Bridges - Good Thing

I haven’t seen his album talked about, like, basically anywhere. I’m surprised, because it’s a really good neo-soul album. It feels a bit repetitive at times, but the quality is consistent throughout. It’s an enjoyable listen if anything else. It’s not experimental, it’s not super varied, but it’s a tightly strung together, quality listen. The instrumentation is rich and catchy, the Leon’s vocals are great, and overall, much of the album is what I’d expect a neo-soul singer who isn’t D’Angelo in 2018. That said, there are a few weak points in the album where it’s a little week - and trends a bit more towards pop disappointingly, but the pure soul parts of the album are where Leon really shines the best.

Playboi Carti - Die Lit

Carti really can’t write music if his life depended on it, but he doesn’t need to. This thing, as a mainstream trap album, is weird. The instrumentals are odd, definitely not the type of thing you’d expect to hear on this type of album for the most part. They’re reminiscent of cloud rap at times, and at other times so incredibly minimal you can’t help but praise Carti for making the song still get stuck in your head. Overall, the instrumentals are entrancing, hazy, sometimes even bordering on possibly experimental. There’s a unique usage of samples that’s just instantly entrancing on a lot of these songs. That said, there’s still a lot of pop sensibilities, and these songs kind of water down the album a bit by departing from these aforementioned traits. It’s also just incredibly long at 19 songs; while this may work for some albums, for the type of music Carti is making, it kind of suffers from its length. Carti’s performances are the point of contention with most people. His writing is, again, basically nonexistent. Still, he manages to somehow steal the show over the production on a lot of this album. Whether it’s just his excessive usage of adlib ridden, partially lazy flows, or half-sung, half-slurred delivery, he just manages to carry a charisma that’s hard to ignore - even when he is saying literally nothing. It’s catchy, and in this type of music, that’s what matters. For hip hop fans especially, it’s an interesting listen. 

Biggest Disappointments & Least Favorite/Worst Albums (No Particular Order)

Kanye West - Ye

I’m a massive kanye fan, and I recognize that a lot of his more recent work can be panned a bit before growing into place. Yeezus and TLOP were two albums which were more growers than straight out the pan classics or similar. Ye, however, is no TLOP or Yeezus. It’s disappointing because a lot of good music came out of the Wyoming sessions, but for as much of a spectacle as it was, its centerpiece really fell flat. There’s some good songs on it - I really do like No Mistakes for example. Overall though? It’s length does it no favors, and at the end of the day, most of the album is incredibly medicore - which is exemplified even further by the fact that it’s Kanye producing it. Certain songs like Violet Crimes, which were at least meaningful, completely lose their meaning once you realize Kanye didn’t even write them, or given his recent associations with certain people, even mean the words written for them. It’s a mess, but not the good type of mess like TLOP. It’s just a mess.

Nas - Nasir

It’s a throw up between this and Ye for what’s the worse album out of the Wyoming sessions. I mean, in the very least, at least Kanye brought his efforts to this record. The production is honestly not bad, and at times, pretty unique. Cops Shot the Kid is a pretty good song, albeit a little bit annoying because of the repetition. The real problem with this album? Nas. For someone with such a reputation for being a legendary rapper - I mean, he wrote Illmatic - what the hell is this? It sounds like he put this together on the taxi on the way to the livestream release party (which unsurprisingly, didn’t even work). Even beyond, the uh, downright insane anti-vax and 5%-er conspiracy shit on the first song, the writing’s just straight up lazy, and Nas sounds like he couldn’t care less. It’s hard to believe a Nas and Kanye collaboration turned out this awful, but here we are.

Denzel Curry - Taboo/Ta13oo

I know people are going to kill me for putting this on the list, but I have to be completely honest. I really like Denzel Curry, and I’ve been cheering for him since before he even made Ultimate. I’ve known him since he was on Raider Klan and working with LUM on Twistin’. I really like him and his music, which is why I’m so disappointed by this album. It’s not as bad as a lot of the other stuff in this list, but it’s not really that good either. Coming off of his last few projects, it feels like a massive step down, and a failure to utilize his best skills while, for the most of the project, capitalizing instead on most of his weaknesses.I won’t say it’s a bad album, but it falls short of expectations. His lyricism is incredibly weak, and when doing a supposed concept album, that’s pretty important. His rapping - and conveying the concept - is subpar at best. He has some good tracks on this, but not enough that it overpowers the vast amount of mediocrity on it. Denzel isn’t a super impressive singer, and he overdoes it a bit with considering this one of his strengths. There’s a lot of boring songs that say very little but masquerade as being deeper than they actually are. There are lots of instrumental choices that destroy the replayability of otherwise good songs too - for example, the high pitched background noise and odd gargling/scratching on Sirens. Overall? It’s not as bad as other albums on this list, but I’m incredibly disappointed with it. Probably the most overrated album of 2018.

Gorillaz - The Now Now

Not sure what to say about this other than it’s about 40 minutes of mediocre, forgettable electropop and synth funk. It’s uh, better than Humanz at least I guess. 

Princess Nokia - A Girl Cried Red

Oh my god, Princess Nokia, why? I love your music, and you were one of my favorite artists to be recently receiving more acclaim - definitely one of the best upcoming women in hip hop too. But this is...awful. I mean, I get it. It’s a fun side-step project that calls back to her roots as a goth kid, something that’d been prevalent in her music. I like emo a lot myself, as I’ve said earlier, but this is just straight up bad. I hope she had fun making it, because I didn’t have any fun listening to it. It takes the absolute worst parts of Lil Peep’s music and exaggerates it; the emo-inspired instrumentals are cheap and unimpressive, and her singing is...awful. It’s like, parody level of bad. Incredibly unpleasant and grating to listen to, and her lyrics are parody level as well, which I assume is at least purposeful. Might honestly be in the running for not just one the most disappointing albums, but one of the worst in general this year.

J. Cole - KOD

J. Cole is a skilled rapper and producer who’s really overrated in social media and music spheres. While I’m glad it’s gotten a bit better, I have to say, the album he put out altogether this year is pretty unimpressive. I’m happy he’s trying a bit better to be accessible, but it’s just not a great attempt at what it could be. His rapping is still pretty good, and I’m glad he’s trying to reach out and make a bit more “accessible” music, but I think a lot his attempts at things on this album fall flat. The production is subdued and forgettable, which can be alright, but combined with his repeated use of repetitive, uninteresting hooks and little progression in each song, it’s just an overall forgettable album. It’s sad, because he touches on some important topics on the album, but it’s just not that well done - and not nearly as profound as J Cole himself seems to think it is. It’s also a step down from 4 Your Eyez Only, which was already quite polarizing. He took the worst parts of that album and carried them to this, while not having the rest of the elements of the album be strong enough to really carry it. Props to J. Cole for his amazing run of features this year though.

A$AP Rocky - TESTING

Testing sounds like what someone who’s never listened to anything experimental would think experimental sounds like. It’s the type of hollow artsy album whose sole artistic merit is constantly reminding you how artsy it thinks it is. There are some decent tracks on here, it’s not awful or anything, but god, it’s just so mediocre. Nothing on here is really memorable; tracks come and go, and features seem incredibly tacked on at times, such as FKA twigs on Fukk Sleep. Rock has flow, but he’s just such a mediocre rapper still. It’s a bit of a mess, and again, not the good type. There are a few good tracks, and a few catchy moments, but with the wait and rollout leading up to this, I can say none of the hype was worth it.

6ix9ine - Dummy Boy

One of most controversial figures in modern music abandons the style he embraced along his come up to further embrace watered down pop music. There are a lot of features, and some of them are good, and some of them aren’t. It’s a compilation of singles made to chart, and any listener can tell on one listen. Sometimes it’s fun, and sometimes it’s downright awful. Did I really expect anything else? Well, I liked a lot of his pre-fame music to be honest, back when he was still signed to FCK THM and repping Scumgang. Stuff like Yokai for example. Unfortunately, this album just isn’t good at all. Formulaic, drab, and watered down pop rap with little identity or variation; and when it does vary - see the latin trap songs - it’s beyond horrible. Sad!

JPEGMAFIA - Veteran

Not gonna say this is the worst album in the world or a necessarily bad album or anything, but it doesn’t deserve the hype. It’s experimental, sure, and impressive at times, sure, but it’s one of those albums which people say they love to appear a certain way more than they actually will ever listen to it. I know peggy couldn’t give a shit what I or anyone else has to say about his music or his messages, and all the more power to him; even though I disagree, I respect it .That all said, I appreciate experimentation, and some songs are okay, but I’m never listening to this again.

Travis Scott - Astroworld

Rodeo-era Travis Scott is never coming back, and that’s a hard thing to deal with. The album has some highs - Stop Trying to Be God is great for example - but its lows are quite low. Again, it’s not a bad album by any means, but when Rodeo is in your discography...meh. It feels like album release schedule is a Fibonacci sequence, because this album is a collage of his last two - Rodeo and Birds In The Trap Sing McKnight. There’s some impressive directing and musical choices on this, but a lot of that super hollow pop sensibility and pop musical direction of the latter shines through as well. Artists grow, and as Travis has gotten bigger, he’s trying his best to keep his entire audience satisfied. With hits like Sicko Mode doing so well, he’s accomplished that. I can’t really sit here and disparage him in full for doing that, but I also can’t lie and say this album wasn’t a little disappointing knowing what highs he could reach if he wanted to.

Yung Lean - Poison Ivy

I love Yung Lean and will defend him and his music no matter what, but this isn’t one of his better ventures. Coming off of Stranger, Lean showed immense growth and experimentation in one of his best and most personal albums yet. He had a few singles in between that and this which were alright, a bit more reminiscent of Draingang and Bladee’s work. When I saw the album cover for this, I assumed it would be in the direction of his punk band, Dod Mark, maybe with a mix of elements from Stranger. Unfortunately, Poison Ivy falls flat on that. It feels like a massive step back for Lean stylistically, especially given he just released one of his best albums prior. The production is pretty great though on its own, just not really in greater context. It’s more of a Draingang-styled album, which is a niche I’m not a massive fan of comparatively. I’ll still be looking forward to his next album though.

Lil Wayne - Tha Carter V

This isn’t a bad album, and before anyone says anything, I’m not a hater of Lil Wayne. In fact, I think there’s an argument for him being one of the best rappers to exist in the genre. That said, the album’s massive wait and hype just wasn’t worth it. People really didn’t know what to expect, and the massive saga that lead up to this couldn’t possibly have met expectations. The music is from an older era, and on a lot of it, you can really tell. Wayne’s rapping is pretty fantastic, and his punchlines and verses are on point as usual. He isn’t really the problem as much as the rest of the album is; dated production, hooks, and features are just a few of the problems I found on the album. It’s a bit sad that this came and went with such an air of general mediocrity around it, because after the saga and the all the shit Wayne went through, he deserved better. Again though, there’s no way this could have met expectations, so in a vacuum - it’s a good album. If this has released when it was originally supposed to years ago, it’d probably be amazing. It’s just in the current musical climate, it feels out of place and dated.

[jbonesy]

Internet-Induced Schizophrenia

In the future, everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes

Andy Warhol

Just a bit over 100 years ago, the rapid birth of the root of modern technology would take place - a second big bang, one that would be a clash of fire and hot steel rather than of stars. And now in our modern era, we sit back in dark rooms at the dead of night, focused on the flowers that have bloomed from this iron seed. With every petal that further grows upon this flower, we invest a part of ourselves, a scattered array of fleeting moments and emotions. Every time we create a new account, or a new post, we imprint ourselves for a sudden second, a second that we can only hope to grasp again, but a second that everyone will see; and as each imprint becomes a petal of this flower, the stem weakens with time, and we begin to lose track of ourselves, wilting away slowly from the seed that was once planted beneath us.  We don’t know why we do it, why we feel so invested in this appeal - in this materialistic nihilism of the present. But we continue each day, splitting ourselves further and further, impressing ourselves among the others that stumble upon the trails we’ve left in the past, all which lead to different people throughout time. Perhaps one day they will find the only petal still connected to the root - and among the millions of personalities we’ve created - among those who have come and gone among us, perhaps those who have seen shadows of the now fallen leaves, maybe they as well will see how far we come in pursuit of ourselves.Perhaps they, from the outside, will see what is still supporting this wilting stem.

I was going to write something here beyond that pseudo-intellectual drivel above, which I had nothing better to do than write at 5 AM; some kind of post delving into the perceived flaws of humanity being exposed further and further by the inter-connectivity of the modern era. I’m certainly no traditionalist - that’s what my original post started with. I felt I needed it as a disclaimer; one to state that this post did not come from a bias or place of hatred, but rather from a deep place of frustration. In honesty, I don’t need to write here what I was originally thinking, because I know what I was going to write is already self evident. The sprawling death of empathy, and the spawn of tribal polarization - of narcissistic nihilism - across humanity, digging it’s place further with each passing day of a surreal era, in which each day irony creeps closer to replacing the pillars of reality. 

But then, you think, beyond that edgy ramble, that we as humans haven’t gone anywhere. That this is nothing new, and that it’d be a joke to say we live in times any darker now than the rest of history. It’s sad, that these bleak tenets have forever governed our society, at times even worse than what we see plastered on the news, on the bowels of social media, and on the billboards that loom over us. But no, instead of the simplicity of the past, we’re now hyper-aware, as if we have slipped past the border of divinity. We are taking in the pain, the joy, the melodrama - the unfiltered voices of millions of eras, of millions of other humans - each second we spend interconnected online, overloading ourselves as if we toowere God.

And with that, we have gone beyond a simple concoction of hedonism or nihilistic intent; we have reached a point where we are numb, only able to feel the anger of those who do not fit in with  what the humans of the past would only call a church. But nevertheless, we - myself included - remain hopeful, thinking that tomorrow things will change. That something will click. That something will change. Maybe, in fact, it will. Maybe among the millions of seconds we now experience each moment - the distorted flow of time that we’ve cultivated - we will find our savior. Maybe in another person, or maybe in their shadow - in a mask they’ve once worn, stained with the memories of the past as if they persist to this day.

As Vishnu claimed in the Bhagavad Gita, “Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds”; and so and have we all, all these centuries later. We have all become creators and destroyers of fleeting worlds, represented in pictures, emotions, and text of ephemeral seconds gone by. I’ve heard some say in the past, that on God’s best behavior, one shouldn’t even know he is there. And as Gods, we have all failed.

[jbonesy]

Andy Warhol & The Art of Inspiration

I’m not the type of person who likes to fluff answers, or present false depictions of thoughts on various things.That said, as someone who works primarily in the games industry, it would be huge lie if I was to say that I was truly inspired by anyone in the industry. I’ve been motivated by the industry perhaps - whether through a sense of vehement competition, or through sparse, glimmering sights at games themselves - but I’ve never truly been inspired by specific figures in the industry. Now, this certainly does not mean I don’t respect figures within the industry, it implies implies that my real inspirations lie elsewhere. 

When I was younger, I never truly wanted to be a game developer. As early as I can remember, I always dreamt of being an author; the majority of my time as a kid was spent writing, locked away in small adobes with pen and paper. Perhaps this was a biproduct of my upbringing - my family was always somewhat behind in technology until quite late relatively, and my only source of video games and the like was my older sister. I had a particular attraction to RPGs and story-based games, a trait that wore off on me from her. I did enjoy other games - classics like Zelda, for example, but my heart was always with RPGs such as Dragon Quest, Final Fantasy, and slightly more obscure ones like Lufia. When my family finally got a computer, I was intrigued, but I was less intrigued by the technology itself, and was more fascinated with what I could use it to produce. Now, I would eventually go down the route of obsession with technology as result of branching paths stemming from learning programming, but that was not until much later. I wanted to be an author until late in middle school, maybe even early high school. So what changed, exactly? Well, shifting mediums, mainly. I got involved in business from a young age, and my interest and talent in programming helped shift me from writing to making games, and from making games to doing business and making games. But even as I started making games, I had bigger dreams than what I found myself occupied with, or what I soon would find myself entranced in as a career.

I’m the type of person obsessed with creation and expression; not just in the typical sense, but in any possible medium. Would I consider myself an artist? Probably not, but I would certainly fit the label of “creator” to say the least. I’m the kind who would try to experiment with any medium, even after only being familiar with it for a day. I remember as a kid, making short films for the fun of it, or attempting to learn drawing, or even learning to knit and sew. Even if my reasons for doing so were, say, childish at the time because of my young age, whether it’s attempting to learn to produce music, or writing non-fiction articles, , that same sentiment of eager creation has always persisted with me. Throughout my life, I’ve been driven by the sentiment of creation, as well as the consistent stride of both competition, and perhaps even validation. I’ve found few idols, who have been again scarce and far between. However, an interesting trait is that none of my idols, or any of my inspirations, ever follow in suit of my actual focus artistically.

Andy Warhol was, and continues to be past his death, a polarizing figure in politics, media, and art. I’m not sure I’d agree with Warhol on everything if he were still alive, but I can’t help but be inspired by him, no matter how far apart we may be in medium and expression. Why?  Well, I see Warhol as a visionary in a way beyond which he is typically recognized. When I look at Warhol, I don’t see him as the creative visionary who pushed forward pop art, nor do I see him as the divisive figure who was near killed by Valerie Solanas; rather, I see Warhol as someone who mastered the art of inspiration. Warhol’s admirable qualities for me are not his creative genius, nor his ability to think outside the box, nor his politics or social statements - it is instead the span of his influence in medium. From Warhol’s Factory in New York City, stemmed more than just a legion of boundary pushing visual artists. From within the walls of The Factory, The Velvet Underground got its start through The Velvet Underground & Nico, and thus influenced proto-punk and punk for years to come, and thus from his influence spawned Devo & David Bowie. In these same walls of his studio, film would forever be changed by his ventures in filmography - including the taboo-pushing Blue Movie, which would be the first erotic film to be widely recieved in the US. Print Media, Visual Arts, Filmography, Music, Social Taboos - Warhol’s Factory became an arthouse dream, and furthermore became a collective which I can’t help but admire. Warhol put it best himself in The Philosophy of Andy Warhol from A to B and Back Again; the intersection of art and business - something he appropriately called “Business Art”. And yes, I would agree business is an art, but so is inspiration. The idea of being able to branch into what you feel like, and willing to experiment in whatever you feel so inclined to. 

I am not an expert in all creative fields, let alone a few, or maybe let alone even one. However, I feel if there is someone I want to emulate more than anyone else, it would be Warhol. I have dreams beyond what I occupy myself with; fashion, music, film, and wiriting are all fields I’d like to venture into in the future. I’d love to create my own modern iteration of the Factory, a place where the intersection of dense business is seen with individual, free expression. Some say that you can never be a master of more than one art, or you can never truly find merit or success by splitting your time among talents, but I disagree. I feel that those who say this only say so to mask their own failures, or to cover their own vapidity and lack of inspiration. It is not something which is inherent to all people - it is something that is best described, like Warhol said, as an art in itself.

[jbonesy]

Vapidity and Life

This blog post has been a long time coming, mainly because I’ve been having issues formulating my thoughts in some way that won’t come off as either pretentious or straight up offensive. This is more of a vent, something I’ve been wanting to get off my mind. Maybe I’m speaking to myself more than I am others. But I want to post it anyway, because I want others to think about it themselves.

I read this pseudo-motivational macro at one point, which quoted The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, which is basically just that, some compilation of dumb macros and whatever other artsy bullshit.It said this:

sonder - the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own—populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness

At first this sounds fascinating, it’s a thought that lingers in the back of your head for a long time after you get the realization. You think about how crazy that is. That everyone is as complex as you. That everyone has these vivid lives with a spectrum of their own ambitions and ideas. It’s a colorful realization. But then, you know, you think about it for awhile  — and then you realize, oh shit, that isn’t true. Now, I’m not saying this because I’m a believer of solipsism or some similar philosophy. No, rather, I’m simply saying this - beliefs aside - as an observation of the world around me, and of course, for good reason. As George Carlin once said,  “Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.” This a funny way to usually appropriate some political belief and misquote to intelligence or motivation or whatever other way of making yourself feel like you’re better the population that breaks their back on the stresses of life and the misfortune of being born in the wrong place and time, to the wrong class and family, to the wrong father or mother, or in the wrong town. You see, at first it’s easy to simply think of this phrase as some kind of statement about how dumb middle america is, or how dumb old people are, or how stupid that drug addict down the block from you is. But that’s not what it’s about. Maybe it was in the context of his stand-up routine, but not in the context I’m presenting. No, rather, I’m co-opting to speak on the vapidity, the boring trap that most people’s lives fall into. It doesn’t matter how intelligent you are, or how rich you are, or whatever other falsely qualifying factor you want to use to sum up the dividends of your life. Those are excuses. The average person does what, make a few friends, get a 9 to 5, see their friends on the weekend, and work until they die so their kids can come visit them on weekend and pretend that they want to be there? No, let’s be honest here with ourselves. The average person does not live a vivid life. Someone in a small town in Montana or upstate New York likely does not a story worthwhile to write a book about, or a blog post, or whatever other bullshit we use to validate our own existence. The little details about you in your childhood and old age do not set you apart. So what, you went on a few adventures as a kid? What did you do to ever think about that, to really sit down and reflect on the world around you? This isn’t some “wake up, sheeple” bullshit. That’s not what I’m saying. I’m saying how often did you ever break from the trance that life puts you in - the trench that we crawl up every time we wake up from sleep to put on the mask that tells us that we’re really excited to start the day. Are you? Do you really want to go to work, go home, go food shopping, go to you family, do whatever? Do you? The answer is probably no. You don’t to do this everyday. For years. For decades. For how long? Until you die? Are you okay with that? Do you want to work that job? Do you want to get old and look back on the last fifty years and realize that your day - your life, your only life - was simply a collection of the same actions, over and over, telling yourself that the life you lived was actually as vivid as the next person who did the exact same thing? So what, you had a few experiences? You had a divorce? You had family issues? That doesn’t make your life anymore vivid than the next person over. So did they. So did their parents. Maybe there was a short idyll period - maybe they did enjoy their lives. What did that enjoyment amount to? 2 years out of the 100 that you maybe are lucky enough to live? What did you accomplish? What were your ambitions? Did you want to own a business? Did you want to have a family? Did you want to write a book? Why did you stop? Why didn’t you? Why you didn’t you take those ambitions up a level? How hard are you willing to work for those ambitions? Do you think you deserve to be rewarded for striving from them? What makes you different from the next person over? Who wants the same thing? What makes you better than your neighbor, who is working to turn their startup into a billion dollar business? Do you think your life is as vivid as theirs? 

It’s funny, how we strive to differentiate ourselves. You can, maybe, on an individual, materialistic or outward level, but if you populate your conversations solely with what you did over the weekend, who your worked with, what your job is, you are not talking. You are spitting back what you’re observing around you. You are not better than your phone, than Siri or Alexa, which can do the same thing. You can reflect more than that. Tell people how much you hate your job. Tell them how you don’t want to go and see your family. Or maybe how much you do - how much you love them. Tell them your reflections, not your observations, but really - don’t lie; don’t think you need to wear some type of mask. Don’t think that you want to be an average person, or have an average life. You don’t. You don’t want to be “happy”, you don’t want to be “content”. No. You want something to make life worth living. Not something which forces you to work that 9 to 5 job, 5, 6, 7 days a week until you die and regret every. single. second. Reflect on what that means. Carve your own lane in life. Aside from whatever other bullshit you have surrounded yourself with. 

Make no mistake. There are people who live far more fascinating lives than you ever will. There are people with millions of dollars who do nothing more than parade themselves around until they die, falling into the same trap that we’re taught that you need money to get out of. You do not need to follow that path. The complacency of life is the greatest pitfall you will ever fall into. Rich, poor, religious, whatever. Do not fall into that trap. Do not be that vapid robot who lies to themselves until they regret their entire life at their last breath. 

You are not different from anyone else unless you make yourself.

[jbonesy]

XXXTentacion and a peek into the Cult Effect in Hip Hop

It’s certainly interesting - at least in some sense - to see people go through infinite sets of mental gymnastics to try and justify the actions of their idols, elevating them to far reaching idealistic pedestals where they can do no wrong. It’s an easily observable element of human psychology, perhaps tying in with the seemingly instinctual desire contained in many people to never admit that there’s a small, small chance that their opinion on something could be incorrect. Sure, it may be funny from a distance, but it’s absolutely beyond frustrating to put up with when it’s actually in your proximity. When two parties face each other and both are thoroughly convinced being incorrect makes them inferior, how can one party ever let up their ideas? Even when people get backed into a corner, it really can be quite fascinating  to see how they try and continue, either by what topics they try and switch to or with what fallacies they pull out to try and desperately justify their stance on an issue. Funny enough however, while certainly related in the same sense, I’m not even specifically talking about politics here. While I’d agree with anyone that hyperpartisanship is a major issue in the political climate - especially at the moment - I’m actually talking about a common occurrence in the hip hop community.

If you aren’t familiar with XXXTentacion, he’s currently quite the polarizing figure in Hip Hop. I won’t judge his music - at least not here - but if anything else, it’s very unique, combining lofi punk elements with traditional hip hop. He’s gathered something akin to a cult following, a brigade of dedicated listeners that one might compare to a displaced metal fan - popular anime avatars, names filled with symbols reminiscent of early 2000s myspace pages, and a passion for throwing threats at those who dare to criticize him. I don’t think the community he’s created around him - much like other rappers, who are essentially expected to be walking cults of personality at this point - it’s just all part of his aesthetic. XXX is an anomaly; with his wide range of music encompassing everything from depressed crooning to borderline screamo to his half blonde dreadlocks appearance,he’s already carved out a niche for himself. Perhaps in the modern underground hip hop landscape - where emo and punk are merging in aesthetic and partially in sounds, and acts like $uicideboy$ and Lil Peep are expanding the passionate fanbases brought in by influential underground acts from Raider Klan fame, XXX isn’t even that far removed or unique. But never say that - or even imply that - in front of many of his fans. Disregarding that for a second, it’s important to take his origin into account here; a large part of what’s helped XXX rise to fame, besides mainstream fringe breakouts like Look at Me, is just how much controversy he’s managed to accrue in such a short amount of time. And yet whenever controversy occurs - whether it be beating up a gay guy in prison for allegedly “looking at him funny when he told him not to” to being accused (unconfirmed) of beating his girlfriend to spending time in jail for armed robbery, resisting arrest, and other crimes - there will always, always be people who come to his defense to justify his actions. 

r/hiphopheads, a large hip hop community on reddit, thrives on lots of these types of discussions. Whenever a headline is posted about a rapper, whether popular or underground, I always love regardless to go into the comments and see what people have to say. As expected, most peoples’ views on the situation are based off the rapper themselves and not off the action done. I’m very much into hip hop, probably unhealthily so, but if there’s one thing I’ve personally learned is that there’s many, many times where you just have to separate the artist from the art. Anthony Fantano, a popular music critic, brought this up a long time ago in a video entitled  “Can Bad People Make Good Music?”, and the point is more relevant than ever - it’s almost akin to asking “Can a bad politician pass good legislation?”. A lot of people would say no, because overlap in belief is seen as sacrilegious to many. And you know what? This more or less applies to music as well. As I mentioned with XXX, many peoples’ opinions of him are solely derived from their view of him. It works two ways; people who dislike him as a person view his music differently, and people who like music view him as a person differently. Now, this is a bit of a generalization of course, but obviously it isn’t completely all encompassing. Going into threads about him beating his ex-girlfriend, you’ll see comments which indicate that perhaps she did something to him which provoked his actions. Now, this isn’t an excuse - at all - but I’ll hand it to them that, fair enough, this is more or less somewhat better of a response to an alleged act than some of the other comments which literally state that she objectively deserved it. You can say that this is unfair because the incident was alleged, but what about his other actions? Grand theft, burglary, armed robbery? Fans will use the same logic to justify his actions. 

Of course this isn’t limited to just XXX. A recent controversy of Young Thug allegedly hitting a female rapper spawned an argument in which many people were saying it wasn’t an issue. While there are certainly cultural implications of this - especially due to the imbued imagery that tends to surround women in hip hop - Young Thug, much like XXX, is often by fans dedicated to justifying his antics. He’s no stranger to controversy, and it definitely shows in his image as a rapper. But even beyond these two rappers, how many hip hop fans have you seen wearing clothing that says or slinging around phrases on social media like “#FREE(RAPPER)”. Whether it be Kodak, Gucci, XXX, or whoever else, fans are more confident in their idol than they are in their actual actions. While there’s certainly an argument that sure, the trial was unfair, or the imprisonment or punishment was the result of some systematic oppression or unfair judgement, is this always the case? Well, just like everyone else, it depends who you talk to. I don’t think many people would argue that their idol is necessarily above the law, but rather than they were unfairly treated. This curved logic allows for many fans to bend the narrative surrounding their idol to something more acceptable. How many people want to walk around proudly saying they’re a dedicated fan of a murderer for example? I don’t know many people who are proud to say they’re Big Lurch fans. It’s uncomfortable to do, and it relates back to the idea of separating an artist from their art. It’s hard to do, so it’s better for people to create an idealized image of their artist to spread. The issue is, the people who they argue with don’t see things the same way they do - the arguing ends up being one-sided, and leads into what can be described as desperate attempts to justify otherwise unacceptable actions. There’s cultural factors to all of this for sure, and certain backgrounds will certainly make you more disposed to viewing strings of actions in certain ways, But when do those actions cross the line from disposition to desperation? When do cultural differences in media get overshadowed by image-furthering marketers and relentless hypebeasts? I think really it ends up, just like everything else, in the eye of the beholder.