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jarintrashb · 2 years

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FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN TODAY

— a really stupid lawyer

matt murdock x reader

cross posted on ao3 @selantris

if you had the choice, you would have thrown that brick at the back of matt’s head.

“I’m sorry — God, I am so sorry-”

”Do not even speak to me, Matthew,” you walked right past his ashamed and pleading figure, heading straight to the car where Foggy waited for the two of you outside of the apartment building.

“I’m so sorry! It was just a reflex,” Matt trailed right behind you, his words coming out jumbled due to their speed, “it was coming right for you!”

“And Peter, who if you forgot, has super spider reflexes would have caught it!” the irritation in your voice as you finally spoke to him properly since the unfortunate event occurred was enough to make him wince, “And “I’m a really good lawyer”?! Seriously?! You’re really fucking lucky I don’t grab that cane and stick it right up your-“

You stopped when you noticed the middle aged woman with a child by her side glaring at you from the crosswalk nearby at your vulgar language — and the fact that it was targeted towards a blind man.

“ He screwed up, didn’t he?” You had barely registered Foggy who had now stepped outside of the car, your facial expression the moment you exited the building had been enough to tell him what happened; a deep, displeased sigh escaped his lips as he approached you both.

Matt instantly grimaced at the thought of the incident.

“Understatement of the fucking year,” you deadpanned, still plagued and drowning in mortification, disappointment, and shock.

╚════.✾. ═╝

35 minutes earlier

“Foggy, Foggy, Foggy,” Matt’s phone blared, interrupting the discussion you, him, Peter, May, and Happy were having concerning the teen’s quite public and controversial current case.

“One moment,” Matt excused himself, remembering to grab his cane as your lectures before the two of you had arrived to Peter’s apartment about not being suspicious and actually acting blind ringing in his head. You gave him a small proud smile at his notion, happy that he was keeping up the act properly.

It wasn’t that he didn’t keep up the blind act well for most of his life. You knew that any normal person wouldn’t suspect a thing about him. But, you had from the moment you met him. You had noticed the way he would sometimes just drag the cane in his hand, with no real direction of it, how he would manage to dodge people and objects that even you missed, or the way it seemed as though he was the one directing you when you had a grip on his elbow, not the other way around.

And he had only become more sloppy ever since he revealed his identity to you. You had become another addition to those who knew his other part time job.

Given the fact that he spent most of his time with you, Foggy, and Karen, he no longer had to keep up his act; which this in return made him careless at not being so obvious in public and amongst others.

And unfortunately, just like you are keenly observant, so is Peter.

So you had made it very clear to Matt before the two had met for the first time today that he could not, under any circumstances, be an idiot today.

Although Matt and you have been married for over a year now, together for a little under four, he hadn’t had the chance to meet Peter yet.

You had been quite close with Peter ever since Tony had introduced him to you when you still worked for the Avenger’s legal team.

In a way, the two of you had a sibling-like bond.

So, you would think that someone that is that close to you would have met your husband by now and had been in attendance to your wedding ceremony.

But alas, the blip was to blame.

“Peter, don’t worry, everything’s going to be alright,” you put a hand on his shoulder when you noticed the anxious shaking of his leg and biting of his lower lip.

“Y-yeah — yeah, it will, I know,” he practically stumbled over his words, trying to convince himself that what he was saying was true.

Your gentle rubbing of his back with your palm had managed to calm him down for the moment as he turned his head and gave you a small smile at the act.

“So..” you started, your gaze landing on Matt whose back was facing you as he stood across the room, one hand holding his phone to his ear and the other gripping his cane as it rested on his hip, an action he did far too often, “What do you think of Matt?”

Peter let out a small chuckle under his breath at the nervousness in your tone as you asked the grave question, as if he was your father and you were asking approval of a boy.

With his best attempt at a deep, gruff voice, a fake stern expression on his face, Peter sat up straight, clearing his throat, “I do not approve of him and I demand you stop seeing him immediately, young lady.”

You gave him a light smack on the back of his head, the both of you erupting into quiet laughs at his horrendous imitation.

As both of your laughs died down, Peter’s expression softened, “In all realness, I think he’s amazing. The two of you look great together.”

“Really?” Your eyes met his, a smile landing on your face at his words.

“Really,” He repeated with a grin, “although, he is quite scary for a blind man.”

You could not help but laugh at the irony of his observation, in both humor but also a sheer amount of nervousness at how quick Peter was able to take note of such a thing, “How so?”

“I don’t know; he’s very intimidating. It feels like he’s staring deep into my soul.”

“That’s just the lawyer in him, Pete,” you jokingly reassured, holding back on making a blind joke at his statement, “Remember you thought the same of me when we first met too.”

“That’s true. You were quite scary.”

“Hey!” You smacked his head — again, “I was not scary. You think everyone who is older than you is scary.”

“Please, enough with the head hitting. I already get enough concussions on the regular,” He massaged the area you attacked seconds prior.

Suddenly as if a thought had planted itself in Peter’s mind, he turned to you, a bit amused and also curious, “Did you ever tell him about you and Mr. Rogers?”

“Shut up-”

“Great news,” Matt interrupted, perfectly on time, as he sat down next to you, a look of confusion on his face, eyebrows raised minimally, as he shot you a glance, seemingly about your conversation just now with Peter, The look lasted a second as he faced the general direction of the rest of you, Happy and May both intently waiting for him to continue as they tuned in, “I don’t believe any of the charges against you are going to stick.”

“Wait, seriously?!” Peter exclaimed in relief and shock, the same expressions mirrored on the rest of you at the announcement.

“I told you!” You gave a small shake of Peter’s shoulders in excitement, “Did Foggy finalize the paperwork?” You turned back to ask Matt who had his head tilted – the habitual gesture he did when he was trying to tune in his senses on something in particular.

He tuned back out at your question, “Yes, sweetheart. There’s only a few more things to wrap up, but we can do that back at the office.”

Your eyebrows furrowed at his action from a few moments prior, but his quick shake of his head and slight wave of his hand was enough to dismiss your concern.

“Oh my god, thank you guys so much. This is amazing!” Peter beamed in joy, finding it hard to believe how everything was suddenly working out in his favor.

“Thank you both; I don’t know what we would have done without you,” May softly spoke in contrast to her nephew’s yawps, putting her palm on your shoulder with a slight squeeze to show her gratitude.

You placed your hand over hers, “Of course, May.”

“You are welcome,” Matt replied with a genuine smile. He knew just how much both Parker’s meant to you and was glad that he had anything to do with helping them out, not just for their benefit, but also for the reasoning of how relieved and happy it made you.

You had been practically losing your mind ever since Peter’s identity was revealed — stressed, anxious, and worried all together for what this meant for the two of them. Knowing that he was able to somewhat assist in fixing this car wreck of an affair was enough payment for him.

But the happiness in the atmosphere was cut short when Matt turned to face Happy, his look turning serious, “However, Mr. Hogan…”

“Yes?” Happy replied, still glimmering with excitement over the recent disclosure.

“The feds are actively investigating the missing technology,” Matt began, “I uh, understand your loyalty to Mr. Stark and his legacy. But if you were involved–”

Happy’s smile dropped faster than Matt’s senses could even allow him to take notice of it, confusion and perplexity coating his voice, “If I was involved?”

“I advise securing a lawyer,” Matt finished.

“I need a lawyer because I’m – I’m under investigation,” Happy began panicking, pointing towards Peter who grimaced at his state, “I thought he was – you said that there were no charges. I could say, “Under advisement of council, I refuse to answer the question respectfully because I–”

You all stared at him as he became a distraught mess.

“-The answer could incriminate me – it’s the saying in Goodfellas.” Happy stammered in distress, his hands flying in all different directions, “What did they say in Goodfellas?”

“Happy, just take a second and hear what Matt has to say,” You interrupted his frenzy, putting your hands up in an attempt to stop his blabbering.

It managed to work as his mouth snapped shut, looking towards Matt as if he was his only hope now.

“You’re gonna need a really good lawyer,” Matt answered, the response doing nothing to calm Happy’s trembling nerves.

“Peter, you may have dodged your legal troubles, but things will get much worse,” Matt turned his head again to face the teen, “There is still the court of public opinion.”

In a matter of a split second, the loud crash of the window pierced through the room.

Your eyes slammed shut as an object hurtled right towards your face, Peter immediately jumping out of his seat and forward to catch whatever had flown in from outside.

There was a sudden moment of silence that seemed even louder than the breaking of the window as your eyes still remained shut, waiting for the impact of the object to hit you.

But, nothing happened.

You hesitantly opened your eyes to see none other than your idiotic, blind, moron of a husband gripping a large, red brick with newspaper wrapped around it in his hand, right in front of your face.

Not a single one of you made a comment.

Peter, who stood frozen in front of your sitting figure, May, who had ducked down slightly in an attempt to shield from the object, and Happy all looked at the lawyer in complete and utter shock and confusion.

But, you... – God, you looked like you had seen a ghost.

You closed your eyes again in complete denial of what just happened, hoping that you had just imagined that all and that Matt had not just done the single most stupid thing he could have possibly done today.

Unfortunately, your hope that this was just a nightmare was cut short by Peter’s voice, “How did you just do that?”

Matt made a pained expression, almost in disbelief at his own actions, “I’m a really good lawyer.”

You don’t think you had ever wanted to hit a blind man more than you did at that moment.

#best kept library 📚#matt murdock #daredevil

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