jaesivq

[jaesivq]

“It felt like fireworks”

inspired by glee s2 ep 12 “silly love songs” (lmao I love this show but when I rewatched it and heard this line I felt so SAD FOR RACHEL HOLY SHIT)

no summary cause idrk know how to cram my whole point to interest you IM SORRY

WARNINGS ▸ mentions of cheating, yelling, toxic relationship, kissing, manipulation, emotional…just sad

GENRE ▸ toxic relationship

CHARACTER ▸ mingyu x reader, wonwoo joins in

MUSIC INSPO ▸ is there someone else by the weeknd, the other woman by lana del rey, reflections by the neighborhood, i love you so by the walters, and heather by conan gray

this is just a draft for the first part idek if I’ll finish it and make a part two yet!! so please let me know if you want another part!!

you never thought you’d be here right now. regretting your decision of transferring from YOUR dream school for the boy you thought would be worth it. I mean you would’ve said he was worth it a couple months ago. maybe your eyes are just opening or maybe you’re overthinking it.

everyone welcomed you with welcoming arms BUT HIM. I mean your own boyfriends face was betraying the words he said.

“Im so glad you’re here” as his smile dropped and he tried to fake up a new one

god you werent that stupid and naive, you could see right through it. his eyes didn’t have the sparkle he use to have even AFTER seeing you everyday. his smile didn’t even show the canines you adored to death. even the tone in his voice dripped with disappointment. It felt like it was storming when you seen him or at least his mood gave off that vibe.

obviously the first thoughts racing through your head were the worst I mean how could you not. college and the parties were a recipe for a bad disaster and mingyu of the all people would damn sure be getting attention.

you DIDNT want to believe it that your boyfriend of a year and just a few weeks wouldve given in to it but you couldn’t not. he never gave you a reason to question his loyalty but that was over the phone, through texts and through social media updates you seen but god it’s easy for people to fake it these days.

so now you’re here sitting with your best friend trying to piece this new act from mingyu.

“okay so let’s get this straight…you transferred, you got here, you surprised mingyu after not seeing him in person for 4 months and his smile dropped”

“yes kae that’s exactly what happened am I crazy or is that weird??” you fiddled with your fingers

kaes mouth dropped and she raised her eyebrow at you “there’s no way in hell you think im gonna sit here and deny that, that’s in fact crazy”

“i know-“

“I mean who does he think he is?? We have to tell cheol about this he would know what’s up with mingyu” picking up her phone going straight to her and her boyfriends messages

you stopped her “no do not go running to cheol about this I don’t want to come to any conclusions without seeing more signs”

“y/n what more do you need? cheol sees me everyday and still gives me the same look he has since he’s confessed even before we got together he’s always had it”

“well isn’t that just great for you” you huffed out hugging your body with your arms as you leaned back in your chair

“Im sorry, you know the eyes hold a lot of emotions and if you can’t look at mingyu in the eyes and feel it then maybe it’s-“ she looks up from her hands looking at you in the eyes “maybe it’s not there anymore y/n”

“yeah I know that’s exactly what I was scared of” you looked away from her and looked out the window of the cafe shop

“hey look” you look back at her and she continues slowly “let’s not instantly…even though it’s a possibility… think that way, how about we really find out”

“how would we do that” she lifts her eyebrow at you “wait..are you suggesting we SPY ON HIM??”

“I mean if we have to we can but we can start small like maybe you should go through his phone” she shrugs

you looked back down at your hands again. you’ve never even gone through his phone. I mean sure that would be the perfect place to start but there’s no way mingyu would be dumb enough to keep something incriminating there…right? you honestly didn’t even know if you could do it I mean what if there’s nothing and you feel guilty he’d probably feel some type of way about the breach of privacy and the lack of trust but….if there is something there then you know that look in mingyus eyes when he first asked you out would never be there again.

you looked back at her “alright let’s do this”

“thank god because this shit has me mad for you”

you guys talked a little bit more but as the sun set you guys decided it was best to wrap up and part your ways.

as you guys walked out and started to walk away from each other you hear her call your name “y/n”

you turn around looking back at her “yeah kae?”

she smiles “dont worry i have your back” and turns back to walk away

as you walked the way to mingyus dorm it was like the whole atmosphere changed. your headphones were tucked in your ears and it was even like your randomized liked songs even knew your fate. the song heather played throughout your ears. was spotify listening to your whole conversation. the air felt cold and smelled of faint rain. there was nobody around. the street lights were dim and not a single animal could be heard. no squirrels running up trees and no birds chirping.

you were scared not even just scared absolutely petrified. could mingyu do that to you…would mingyu do that to you? since you came a week ago he didn’t even sound the same, talk the same and when he touched you he felt like a stranger. a distant stranger. somebody you loved so much you could scream it out to the whole world yet when you wrapped your arms around him it felt like opposite magnets. and yeah that’s the kicker he didn’t run to you he didn’t even pull you in for a hug… you had to reach out for his cold touch.

you put a pep in your step. you didn’t even text him warning him about your appearance. he gave you a key when you surprised him telling you to just stop by because he’s too busy for a formal meeting right now. he barley looked you in the eyes just plopped a key in your palm and folded your hand over with his gripping it giving a fake smile at most because you seen the way he dropped it when he turned to walk away.

the song shifted to “im not the only one” and you felt a jab in your chest. you would’ve thought you were having a panic attack with the way your body reacted to the song. your body felt hot and you could’ve sworn you felt that sting in your eye as if your body was fighting tears. your heart knew but your mind had hope that mingyu wouldn’t have traded you for a fling.

you inched closer to his dorm hall walking up the pavement pressing your key card against the censor and reaching for the lobby door. you made your way to his hall patting around your eyes making sure you weren’t just numb to the feeling of crying and didn’t miss the drops. you pulled your phone out making sure your face looked fine. you inched closer to his dorm and the door opened and mingyus broad body stepped out facing the opposite way of you holding the door open as a girl stepped out smiling up at him.

you stopped in your tracks. it was like your heart paused for a second and then it rushed to start up again. your hands shaking and your breathing increasing.

“so I’ll see you tomorrow night right?” his voice rang out

she reached for his hand that wasn’t on the door squeezing it “yeah of course see you then gyu” she said walking away

she passed you. and by the time mingyu turned around going to say one last thing to her his eyes landed on you.

those eyes. those fucking eyes. the most emotion you had seen in days. being that of guilt? of anger? of sadness? you couldn’t even tell anymore.

gyu? it felt like a punch to the gut.. the nickname his friends and you called him now spoken by a girl who got the look you craved.

that wasn’t mingyu, that wasn’t your mingyu, that wasn’t your high school sweetheart, that wasn’t the boy who asked your dad before taking you to prom, that wasn’t the boy who asked you to his girlfriend during a big fourth of july fireworks show where you guys were away from everyone and when the first boom rang out and the sky lit up and you turned around to look at him with a big smile plastered on your face did you see him looking at you with a promise ring in his hand…yeah that wasn’t your mingyu standing there like a deer caught in his headlights.

you dropped your bag more so your body went limp and it was like your shoulder couldn’t even hold the weight of a few books anymore. your hands trembled grasping your face covering your mouth as the tears welled up at your waterline.

time felt like it paused the moment he turned around but it was just a couple seconds. the sound of your bag hitting the floor brought you out of it.

“y/n-“ he moved into the hallway his dorm door shutting behind him he slowly inched forward his hand reaching out

you stepped back as you repeated “oh my god..oh my god���oh my god” the words got more incoherent. your throat stung. It felt like you could barley speak and if you did you were gonna burst at the brim. your vision was fogged.

“y/n it’s not what it looks like” he inched closer “y/n it’s not”

“stop” you croaked out pushing your hand out you turned your head away not looking at him “don’t come closer to me”

he stopped “y/n seriously look at me love”

“DONT call me that. you can’t call me that anymore. you haven’t called me that in weeks DONT think now is the time for it. that meaningless name can’t save you” you spat out

gosh as heartbroken as you were in that moment you weren’t fucking pathetic. you had to stand up for yourself. your body felt weak and your eyes and throat stung but he didn’t deserve to see you like this.

“y/n stop it wasn’t like that, she wasn’t here for whatever you’re thinking” he stepped forward grasping for your hand

you pushed his hand away stepping back grabbing your bag off the ground. it felt like your fingers were gonna snap from the pressure of your bag. he really made you that weak. or maybe you felt so sick from everything that’s going on. your body couldn’t even stand it.

“no gyu-“ saying the nickname you always called him didnt even feel like it was yours to call “no mingyu you don’t get to tell me to stop and you don’t get to try and correct me for what I just saw”

“whyre you assuming that i would even do that” he raised his voice his head leaning closer to yours “why would I do that to you???!!”

you turned your head away “oh please cut the fucking act you’ve been acting different since I got here, you aren’t a fucking saint mingyu” you pushed him away

he scoffed “what are you even referring to, I’ve been the same since we’ve been together nothings changed and I didn’t do shit to you” and in the matter of seconds his tone changed “you have to listen to me love” he reached out for your face

you smacked his hand away “I don’t have to do shi-“

the sound of footsteps walking up echoed throughout the halls. you turned back seeing two people walking down the hall your way.

you turned back looking at him swinging your bag back over your shoulder “we’re done here I don’t even know you anymore mingyu”

you stepped back walking away avoiding eye contact with the people walking in. you didn’t even turn back to look at him. and he didn’t go for you. you had no words for what you witnessed. you held in the tears as your eyes stung and your throat ached even worse.

you reached the lobby doors the doors clicking as you pressed against them and the tears flowed. you’d never felt the pain you had felt right now. your whole body was shaking as you walked letting the door shut and your relationship with mingyu ending.

the sky lit up with thunder at the click of the door and the droplets started hitting the concrete. and you could’ve cared less. the sound of the rain and the thunder canceled out your sobs. your hands clawed at your face as the tears kept flowing. you just stood there with the rain engulfing you and your tears mixing with it. you couldn’t even physically step forward. you couldn’t even make out a normal breath.

you wobbled to the closest bench by the doors and you just sat there the tears couldn’t even make it out of your eyes. was it physically possible to feel like crying and not be able to? you just felt like you were in shock and all you could vision was his face when he turned around. the pain kept hitting you as you replayed the image over and over.

“y/n?”

you heard that deep calming voice and you already knew. you looked up seeing the exact face you thought belonged to that voice. the black hair, the glasses, the soft smile.

he rushed over his umbrella covering over you “what’re you doing out here like this?? you’re gonna get sick come on come inside”

“wonwoo i cant- i have to go”

“why not? you dont have an umbrella and you’ll be walking you shouldn’t go now” he reached for your hand “just come with me”

your body betrayed you and let him grab your hand helping you up, you should go you shouldn’t go inside with him. you can’t go back in there. your mind was spinning.

“y/n? come on” he had walked you over as he keyed in and held the door open

you walked in with him and he shook out his umbrella and held your stuff in one hand

“wonwoo i cant go with you i have to leave”

“it’s storming I can’t let you go out there like this” he looked at your state of soaking wet clothes

“it’s mingyu i cant go back there” you said quietly

you could see the realization in his face that he found out that you were out there like that because of him “don’t worry me and him aren’t even dorm mates anymore” he smiled softly

“i still shouldn’t wonwoo” you reached for your bag

he backed away “no I’ll let you leave once the weather clears i promise”

how could you not trust the warmth in that voice when everything else felt so cold. the weather was cold, mingyus touch on your hands just minutes prior was cold, his voice was cold even to your face after that. but even with that warmth you couldn’t trust him after what mingyu just did. he probably knew, they probably all knew.

he could see the look in your face go from convinced to right back how it was

he reached for your hand clenching it “you can trust me, im roomed with dk but he’s busy off with soonyoung just come till the weather clears and we will get you home”

your body let him pull you to his dorm where he pulled you in setting everything down and offering you clothes to get out of the drenched ones. there you were sat on his couch as you waited for him to change. your head was everywhere. you just caught mingyu with another girl, you tried to be strong and storm out and your feelings got the best of you now you’re here being helped by his best friend. god you were so pathetic.

“hey im back” he smiled at you as he took the space right beside you

you looked down at the floor and hummed in response

“tell me what happened” his voice was stern and you looked up at him

“what do you mean nothing happened” you looked back in forth between his eyes

“we both know that’s not true, tell me what happened seriously” he scooted closer “look i know something happened it’s written all over your face and you were sitting out there in the rain with no care…nobody does that y/n”

“i-“

“you can trust me”

“your his best friend though” you looked away

“ive known you since high school come on im not just going to instantly take his side y/n, just tell me”

“okay wonwoo”