jacquelineadelia

[jacquelineadelia]

harry dubois would end death note in one episode. he'd be unkillable bc he has no fucking idea what his name is and then he'd go drink driving and accidentally run light over and the killings would mysteriously stop

[jacquelineadelia]

Mesopotamian girl sending clay tablets to her best friend who lives five city states to the west: what if..... Enkidu begot Gilgamesh with child?🤭

[jacquelineadelia]

Looking back, cannot comprehend how I lived a single day as a child. Your best friend now sits across the room from you because the teacher rearranged seats. You have to go to a family reunion this weekend and you’ll be stuck in a car or around people you don’t know for hours. You heard a story about a dude who chewed gum wrong and his tongue fell out. It’s 11 AM.

[jacquelineadelia]

palpatine straight up told anakin he was a sith lord and anakin was like well. this is a lot to process so im going to go fetch my boss and we’ll come back in about half an hour and murder you so don’t go anywhere and palpatine didn’t you have to admire the man

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started watching season 8!

[jacquelineadelia]

Sauron: “I like your Silmarils”

Morgoth: “Thanks, I stole them from the president”

[jacquelineadelia]

Nobody remembers how hard the internet made fun of the original Xbox. The moment it was revealed it was heckled for its name, its huge size, its unwieldy looking controller, excessive number of buttons, the entire fact Microsoft was trying to enter the console gaming battlefield, when it actually sold well everyone I knew was incredulous because consensus was that the Xbox was stupid and laughable.

I've never had an Xbox system and have no strong opinion on it but this reaction is still so fresh in my mind. I swear there were countless memes about the console being TOO BIG and most of them are gone without a trace. I was there! I was there when the Xbox was TOO BIG!!! There are still a couple of the memes left!

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People on this site will be weird gay shut-ins their whole lives but as soon as they realise they can find other weird shut-ins to have sex with suddenly they get all pretentious about other people being virgins

[jacquelineadelia]

also it annoys me that when trans men complain about how bad it feels to be excluded from women's spaces now that they're recognized as men, they're often met with sympathy, and many women's spaces make an exception for them because biological essentialism matters more to them than anything else. meanwhile, when trans women express sorrow over having been excluded from even something as minute as friend groups of all girls, we just get shrugged at and told to get over it. meanwhile we're still excluded from women's spaces. it's almost like there's a systemic form of oppression that specifically targets transfems or something.

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I think it would be really fucking funny to write a piece of fiction set entirely in real life but using lazy fantasy worldbuilding talk. I gather coin* for the road west** - I will need it to enter the Capital.***

* two quarters and two dimes

** Interstate 64

*** Richmond, Virginia

[jacquelineadelia]

gamestore tgirl is so holy. gamestore tgirl is the proof that we can be happy just as we are. gamestore tgirl does not forgo her boyish interests for boring ones we are expected to enjoy to Affirm our Womanhood. gamestore tgirl does not cast her tyrannid army away for makeup tutorials watched in bed from a stickerless macbook. gamestore tgirl does not abandon her old friends, as long as they treat her right and bring extra dice. gamestore tgirl forgives their transgressions, the ways in which they are bad, the ways in which she is bad too. gamestore tgirl is a beacon of hope. gamestore tgirl blazes ways for more of us simply by existing in a space of enjoyment. gamestore tgirl i love you forever. gamestore tgirl i owe you my life.

[jacquelineadelia]

George: thats all he would say, was "keep administering the shocks, keep going."

jerry: so what did you do??

george: what do you think i did? i kept administering the shocks!

jerry : even though you could hear the person on the other end--

george: well what was i supposed to do!

jerry: --screaming and begging for mercy?

george: "keep going, keep shocking him," the guy was telling me! *puts his head in his hands* he was in charge of the experiment, he was paying me, what was i supposed to do? tell him to go suck a lemon?

jerry: so what you're telling me is, you were just following orders?

*kramer enters wearing a brand new pork pie hat with the price tag still on*

kramer: guess who just got paid to sit around in a room pretending to get electrocuted all day!

[jacquelineadelia]

this one

[jacquelineadelia]

the crushing guilt of being unproductive vs the exhaustion of being burned out. fight.