jacquelineadelia

[jacquelineadelia]

joking that an adult character who acts childish doesnt know what sex is will never be as funny as saying the same thing about a big tough murderman videogame protag

[jacquelineadelia]

as a feminist and fujoshi for heterosexuality, it is my belief that the greatest trick the devil ever played was convincing a generation that the most interesting fictional m/f dynamic (and maybe even the one which is most respectful to women) is one where an interesting woman is fucking a boring and skittish baby man who is obsessed with her as a concept. and they’ll say she’s pegging him but what they mean is that she orders for him in restaurants and maybe, like, wears winged eyeliner. you aren’t even actually letting this fictional woman dominate this fictional man you’re just gesturing at the idea because you have misogynistic ideas around “active” vs “passive” sexual roles and what they say about a person’s moral behavior. how are we meant to get out of this patriarchy if you can’t even envision that woman from your shows having fulfilling sex with someone she is attracted to.

[jacquelineadelia]

i just started walking and ended up at the sea. 🌊

[jacquelineadelia]

I understand that coming up with interesting ways to describe penises is a perennial challenge for fanfiction authors of a particular bent, and it's not my intention to impose additional hurdles; however, it's unavoidably true that – unless one consciously adopts a very distanced tone – even fiction written in the third person has an implicit viewpoint character, and that one's word choices consequently imply things about that implicit viewpoint character's perspective.

All of which is to say that no, I'm afraid I don't in fact believe that this particular character would think of her penis as a "fuckpole".

[jacquelineadelia]

[jacquelineadelia]

I think I got possessed by charlie chaplin and the only way I can tell this story is by greentext I hope you all understand

>be me (20 year old fool) >live in nyc >walking around and realize I haven’t eaten and also need to do some work so I decide to go to a cafe >walk around for like 30 minutes until I finally find one, looks great very peaceful plenty of people working >walk inside order bagel the guy behind the counter is french(???) and he talks slowly but my brain is on autopilot so I look like an asshole who talks too fast because nyc cafes are usually a quick-time event and I'm disrupting the cafe zen I guess >panic order first bagel I see to redeem myself >ice coffee and loaded bagel (whatever that is) is 20 dollars altogether >whatever the place looks nice for work >barista gives me a number stand for my bagel and I walk away and stand in the main space before realizing I need to still get my coffee? Come back looking even more like an asshole >coffee is in incredibly inconvenient glass cup and filled to the brim too >sugar station is right next to barista so he watches me now pour an obscene amount of sugar syrup but very very slowly >sugar syrup pourer is mildly broken and every time I try to get it to flow faster than "pouring cold tar" it squirts a pump onto the table >sit down >realize I’m sitting in their fucking decorative ~aesthetic~ chair and not a real fucking table >spend 2 minutes slowly dragging a table closer before realizing I look insane and moving all my stuff >still sitting in decorative chair during all of this >guy talking to his friend nearby is watching me and trying not to laugh at me out loud >preparing myself for putting the table back and admitting defeat >do not take coffee off of table >stand up for this but the table is lighter than expected and I tilt the table when I try to scoot it back >coffee leans slowly and cartoonishly close to falling over but I quickly scoot the table over and put it down before it can fully tip and ruin me forever >do this routine of up and down table 3 fucking times moving it back >sit down in shame at real table >guy talking to his friend subtly angles himself to be watching me over his friend's shoulder >take out laptop to work and it’s out of power >no biggie I’ll plug it in I even sat next to four power outlets :) >try first one >no good >try next one >all four outlets don’t work. >want to leave but still have bagel so maybe life is good >bagel arrives >no fucking cream cheese on my bagel. >lady who brings out my bagel is an elderly old-school nyc lady who looks at me with barely hidden disgust for my unknowing bagel monstrosity of 99% spring mix, warm cucumber slices, three pieces of bacon, and a fried egg >bagel is too tall for the second bagel piece to go on top of the bagel >trash can is right next to barista so they’ll see me throw out the untouched shameful top of the bagel too >table is also too small for the bagel plate and my laptop and too cramped for me to easily put it away >eat with laptop on lap (top) (haha) >bite bagel >runny yolk >egg bursts >YOLK ALL OVER LAPTOP. >guy still watching me >tiny courtesy napkin to wipe up my egg shame. >humiliating smooth jazz is playing during all of this. >charlie chaplin's ghost finally releases me from my torment.

[jacquelineadelia]

meme redraw

[jacquelineadelia]

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

[jacquelineadelia]

you don't talk to your friend for 3 years then talk to them like no time has passed? Bro you may not have a perception of time but your former friend you ignored absolutely does. Asshole

I know this is the piss poor reading website but holy fuck

For context this is what anon is referring to:

"I lack perception of time so you could legit walk up to me and say "Hi" after 3 years and I'd be like "aww I missed you. we talked just last week :3""

Life shit happens and friends do drift apart. It happens. But I never implied I was the one that ignored them.

Anon I think you should eat gravel and break all your teeth

[jacquelineadelia]

he's very excited about his first night as a jack o lantern

[jacquelineadelia]

madohomu

[jacquelineadelia]

fashion statement

fully obsessed with this thing honestly

[jacquelineadelia]

Musk apparently is considering the idea of buying hasbro to secure the rights to dnd. Thoughts?

I think it would be really funny if Musk managed to do to D&D what not a single "play another game" warrior could only ever dream of,

[jacquelineadelia]

Source: instagram.com/tanya

About:

[jacquelineadelia]

[jacquelineadelia]

TFW when you give a 5 year old kid a keyblade, and then suddenly that kid is 16, gay, depressed, and needs a hug but can’t break down because he has to be a “leader”.