I am a dreamer...i am a thinker. I live in my own world. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ All poems written here are my own unless otherwise stated. Please DO NOT copy. Ask before using them.
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Random
Random things affect our thought process unconsciously. I have realized that when we are going through certain phase in life, we somehow start relating everything we see, read, watch to our situation. We see bits of pieces of it in everything. And how a simple movie can cause a havoc in your life. Because you start relating it. Before I saw more - As an after-thought it had nothing at all that i can relate to. But at that moment it made me restless & anxious. The pace of the movie made me uncomfortable. The storyline made me restless. That sounds & voices in it made me too anxious. It took me 2-3 days to get over that. If you ask me why - i have no answer to that. I find no reason to feel so or relate to that at all. I did like the movie after all. But watching it was - well, you know what!! Similar thing happens while reading as well. Ofcourse not all the time. But sometimes. Does it happen to you too? Considering am writing about this 5 days after watching it shows, I still haven't gotten over that. And that is making me more uncomfortable. I watched other movies since then but strangely enough i can't even recall their names. Weird! Like often!
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Reminder to self
You don’t feel like getting up. You don’t feel like taking shower. You start getting pains in shoulder, back and head. You lie down on couch for hours. Doing nothing. And you tell yourself- “oh you can do this sometimes, its Ok to do nothing sometimes.”
But then this becomes normal and repeated feeling.
And suddenly one day you start recognising this. A feeling of deja-vu!
This has happened before.
You pick up the signs.
Do you want to go back to the same place again?
The dark lonely place. The place which keeps dragging you down and puts the blame on physical issues like pains and aches. The place where tears roll down without warning. The place where outsiders are not allowed. The place which only keeps getting darker.
No no no no!
You remind yourself of that phase. You cannot go back to that. Noone would be able to bring you back if you go there again. You do not even have those saviours around anymore.
A lot of realisation comes along with this thought.
Get up. Keep going. Don’t give power to that darkness to pull you down.
~A reminder for self in times like this.
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Kyun yeh aana jana laga rakha hai
क्यों यह आना जाना लगा रखा है कुछ पल रुको इस पार कुछ बातें हो जाएँ कुछ तुम अपनी कहो कुछ हम अपनी सुनाएं जानों तो सही क्यों यह दिल उदास रहता है पूछो तो सही क्या नींद यहाँ आती है चलो चुप बैठे कभी सर ही हिला देना क्यों यह आना जाना लगा रखा है। --------------------- Please do not copy without permission
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To you...
Dear unknown, There are countless random things that come to my mind and i feel i must share with you. Some i remember and some i forget after that moment is passed. Some good some bad. Sometimes those are just mundane daily life things. You know like something i do, or something i watch, or just music. There is a different charm in sharing random stuff with you, even if it bores you to death - which probably it might do at times. It's a strange phase in my life. I am not sure i should be happy or sad, should i be shedding tears or just laugh and smile on random moments of joy, Or should i just ignore and behave like nothing has changed in life! Which one of these reactions will be normal? What is right way to behave? And then arises the ques, should i reach out to people for help and guidance and advise or decide what feels right to me! What if my decisions are not the right ones? What if i am only thinking one aspect and not all? There are countless such "What - ifs.." which come to my mind every other minute. What? How? When? ...too many unanswered questions out there! Too many decisions to make! Too much action to be taken! Too much thinking to be done! I wish I could sit together so I say out all loud to you. So i could hear back your thoughts. Or may be we could just sit and have coffee in silence. Sometimes! Keeping the faith! Me
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When Snow flakes bring a message
For months, i am having major reading and writing block. I have been itching to write - something... anything - for a very long time ...but nothing would come out. No words, no inspiration, no ideas, no emotions. It's either been blank or too chaotic to sort out and give it any form. Infact no communication or sharing of thoughts has been happening for last few weeks. Some friends have been trying to reach out and talk - with little success. Some others stopped bothering or making an effort. Some i expected to be around and to go that extra mile and make some effort but in vain...and eventual pain. All that pushed me further inside the layers i had been building around already. Life became loaded with feelings of hurt, sadness and detachment. This morning was different. As i got down from bus to walk to the office, it started snowing. Those light tiny puffs of cotton falling from sky. I looked up and smiled. As much as i hate walking in rain, its completely opposite feeling in snow. I walked slowly. Smiling. And felt as if some load is being lifted off my chest. Those tiny soft flakes made my heart feel lighter. I wonder, how we keep looking for comfort in our loved ones and expecting them to be there. While the comfort can come in any form, from anywhere at any time. Universe sends signals in many ways! May be this is it! May be its time to Let go! Let go of old thoughts Let go of the hurt Let go of expectations Let go of fears Let go of anger Let go of people i don't feel connected to Let go of everything that's not letting me rise The times now need me to focus. Prioritize and Focus! Just look up, let go and feel light and bright!
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How?
Ever heard of the heartache That is felt in the bones Or that choking Felt in the stomach Thoughts That tear the skin. Or Tiredness Felt in soul And Exhaustion In the brain! How do i let go!
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Time for change
“It is not the strongest who survives, neither the smartest, but the one who copes best with changes”.
~Darwin
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What...Why...
Ponder And wonder What, Why... of life Of relationships Of thoughts shared and those not said Of emotions felt Of dreams stitched Of hopes and of fears Of giving up Or waiting just a little more Of letting go Or trying once more ... Questions not asked Answers that will never come
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Bhuul gaye
Khud se milna milana bhul gae
ANJUM LUDHIANVI
ḳhud se milnā milānā bhuul ga.e
log apnā Thikānā bhuul ga.e
rañg hī se fareb khāte raheñ
ḳhushbueñ āzmānā bhuul ga.e
tere jaate hī ye huā mahsūs
aa.ine jagmagānā bhuul ga.e
jaane kis haal meñ haiñ kaise haiñ
ham jinheñ yaad aanā bhuul ga.e
paar utar to ga.e sabhī lekin
sāhiloñ par ḳhazāna bhuul ga.e
dostī bandagī vafā-o-ḳhulūs
ham ye sham.eñ jalānā bhuul ga.e
Source : rekhta.org
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Relax.
We all deal with stress often. Anxiety. Restless. Depression. Stress. All these and more.
Vexking gives a quick solution to relax yourself.
Tried and Tested.
Go read on...
http://ift.tt/2rBPd4g
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Forgotten?
“When it comes to my memory there are three categories: things I want to forget, things I can’t forget, and things I forgot I’d forgotten until I remember them.” Excerpt From: Ahern, Cecelia. “The Marble Collector.” "Things we want to forget" Are we able to forget things we really want to forget? Are we able to forget things when we want to? Doesn't it work opposite? The more you want to forget something the more it haunts you. The more you want to lock things away in a corner the more they keep popping up in front of you. And in most instances - in the least expected situations, in the most unlikely moments and more often than not from people you would never expect it. It doesn't make it simpler that these are often the most painful things of life. Ah - Universe and its mysteries! "Things we can't forget" Anything which involves deep emotional can't be wiped off. Never. "Things I forgot I’d forgotten until I remember them" These are usually the good things. Surprise?!? The good happy memories we want to savor every day. The things that keep us going. The things that bring hope. We keep shrugging these away and covering up with the sad ones but NO - we cannot forget them. Universe reminds us of them from time to time. The not-so-positive people like me always give highest attention to the sadness inflicting things. Yet i am reminded of the few happy ones. I can't forget those. I don't want to either.
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Ma
Some songs which trigger a truckload of emotions and memories.
Thanks Mom for giving me this life.
youtube
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V_Sdahb-JHM
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kyun
kyun ruk sa jata hai kabhi kabhi guzarta waqt kyun neend aate aate gayab si ho jati hai kabhi kyun haathon kee lakeerein badli badli nazar aatii hein kyun saath dene wala saaya saath chor deta hai kabhi kyun nazar nahi aata chehra apne hee aaine mein kyun haath chor dete hein saath dene ka waada karne wale kyun raasta achanak anjaan sa ho jata hai kyun apne ik din praaye se lagne lagte hein kyun apne hee dil tootne kee awaaz sunayi nahin deti kyun awaaz bhi pareshan karti hai aur sannata bhi kyun sabke beech bhi akele ho jaate hein hum kyun sawaal anginat aur jawab koi nahi...
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Aaja
Jiye ja rahe hein Teri yaadon mein aise Aur jaan liye jaaye Tujhe yaad karna Kinara karun Ya tajurba dobara Yeh dil na hee jaane Na saansein sambhalein Isse dard bolun Ya dil kee gehrayi Aakhon se jo yun Chalke ja raha hai Tujhe yaad karun Ya yaadein sambhalun Na jaane ban gayi Kab yeh aadat hamari Tu ik baar aaja Nayi yaadein bana ja Kuch apni suna ja Kuch hamari tu sun ja Har saans ko yun hee Chala lengay hum phir Tu hasna sikha ja Thoda jeena sikha ja Bas ik baar aaja Tu ik baar aaja
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Breathe
We humans are so prone to letting everything affect us more than we can ask for. We let other people affect us too deeply. We are afraid to move on. We get stuck. Sometimes we forget that there are way more pages in this book of life. We must flip over to next one. We cannot keep reading the same chapter over and over again and let is continue affecting us. Past cannot be changed or corrected. We need to let it be.
And Why do we feel sorry for things that bring us both happiness and sadness. Yes - it's possible!! Love!!! One of those! Well...!! Let it be. Sorry for feeling happy? Sorry for being loved? Or sorry for loving too much? Sorry for feeling sad for not accepting it? Whatever!!!
We are constantly wondering what is right and what is wrong. Analysing. Stress, unhappiness, overthinking- they all kill us slowly. Me - for sure!!!!!
May be all we need is - for a while - don't think. Don't imagine. Don't wonder. Just Breathe.
BREATHE.
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One word
Everything about life in ONE word!! perpetual never ending or changing. "deep caves in perpetual darkness" everlasting, never-ending, eternal, permanent, unending, endless, without end, lasting, long-lasting, constant, abiding, enduring, perennial, timeless, ageless, deathless, undying, immortal; unfailing, unchanging, never-changing, changeless, unvarying, unfading, invariable, immutable, indissoluble, indestructible, imperishable; raresempiternal, perdurable
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