ivuravix

[ivuravix]

i’ll follow you anywhere you go

pedro pascal as joel miller | 1.09

[ivuravix]

I recently saw a post saying that Henry Cavill apparently didn't read the Witcher books before playing Geralt because he didn't know they existed and (while that's not why the Netflix adaptation is bad) it inspired me to let y'all in on a piece of Polish lore.

Polish people fully believe there's a curse placed on the books that make it impossible to adapt successfully onto a screen.

The first attempt happened in 2001 in the form of a movie. It portrayed the events of "Matter of Price" from the first Witcher book. You have to understand that this was only ten years after the USSR fell apart and freed Poland from its grasp. The country was still majorly struggling financially, so despite the fact that Matrix came out two years prior, and despite a nearly five million dollar budget, the visual effects were... painful to watch. Old Polish productions also had a specific type of pacing to them, characteristic for the region at the time (think black and white movies), so the movie has not managed to stand the test of time. The music is beautiful, though, and the production got a few awards based on that.

The following year, a single season of a TV show was filmed and released. It was a continuation of the events of the movie, following the plot of the books, and, while it has better ratings than the movie did, the result still wasn't great. I remember watching a few episodes with my friend when I was a kid. There was a scene where the characters were chasing a baby dragon around, which, as my friend quite accurately described, looked like it was made of an umbrella someone was pulling around on a string. And, while that's understandable knowing the technology the production team was working with at the time, the Poles felt the effect simply didn't do the Witcher, a de-facto fantasy monster hunter, justice.

The show did not get picked back up after the final episode of season one hit the Polish tv screens.

Then there were the games.

I have to say that I am fully biased and love them to death, but I recognise they weren't without flaws and aren't everyone's cup of tea. The first game, despite an amazing storyline, is currently virtually unplayable or, at best, incredibly annoying to play. The REDs were only just starting out back then. It was also a long time ago, and technology limited what they could do. The second game improved majorly upon what the first one didn't manage to accomplish and remains a very pleasant experience story and gameplay-wise. The third is a masterpiece, of which I have to convince exactly no-one, because everyone knows it.

None of it apparently matters, however, because the author of the books absolutely fucking hates them.

He said it countless times in interviews. He doesn't believe that videogames are a good storytelling medium, and he doesn't like the Witcher games. He sold the rights for the REDs to use his work on a whim for practically pennies, convinced the resulting game would flop. Seeing how well CDPR did was a bit of a shock to him, and following their success, he promptly lawyered up to demand more money for them. (It was a whole thing. He was technically within his rights, his claims were protected by the Polish law, but the way he went about it was very unpleasant. The REDs wanted to settle out of court and were happy to give him the sum he requested, but he decided to take the matter to court anyway. Google if you're interested, the drama was real.)

On top of all of that, the games aren't an adaptation per se. They follow an original narrative set loosely after the events of the books.

And then finally, along came 2019 and Netflix decided to take a crack at the show.

Surface level, everything looked hopeful. Sapkowski announced he'd be working on it with the showrunners, we even got a Polish actor in the cast, everything seemed in order.

And then... Netflix delivered... that.

(Compulsory note, before the Netflix Witcher fans bite my head off: like what you like. I'm describing the perspectives of many Polish people, including my own. If you have a different perspective, good for you.)

Nothing made sense. The characters were flattened, the plot was thrown out the window, the complex personal storylines narrowed down to single desire points. The Yennefer magic school arc was weird and unnecessarily sexualised, Queen Calanthe seemed to have displaced her entire cunning intellect, and the Witcher didn't even have cat eyes. I could go on. For the sake of brevity, I won't.

And if it were a fantasy show loosely inspired by the world of the Witcher, it would have been very pleasant to watch. To be The Witcher, though, the national treasure, the single thing the international culture recognises us for outside of maybe stereotyping alcoholism, the bar was much higher and the show failed to meet it by a large margin. The longer it went on, the less in common it had with the source material. I've not watched it following season 2, but even then, the events were drifting further and further away from what can be found in the books.

So, here it is. The Witcher curse. A beloved series of Polish books that has yet to find a loyal adaptation onto a movie or tv screen. The first person who accomplishes it will surely ascend into godhood, carried into the heavens by a flock of wyverns.

[ivuravix]

[ivuravix]

its so easy to pander to me in fiction media. show me a guy that for some reason doesnt feel himself to be as human as most others are and i will sit with him for hours

[ivuravix]

“you should be at the club” i should be by the sea. i should be in the mountains. i should be awestruck and rendered speechless by the majesty of the natural world. if you even care

[ivuravix]

simon riley is a hater through and through. always moaning about something or someone

when someone sits next to him on the bus or train, even though there were plenty of other seats available, he can’t stop his shoulders slumping. a heavy sigh leaving his mouth with a hefty roll of his eyes,

‘for fucks sake’ he mumbles under his breath whilst the person who had the misfortune of taking that seat side-eyes him, clearly uncomfortable

absolutely despises slow walkers and people who stop directly in front of him. has absolutely no shame in shoulder checking people or overtaking them with a quick glare and disapproving shake of his head

[ivuravix]

A moonlit hotel room, just him and the devil 🩸🦇

[ivuravix]

the woman dies.

[ivuravix]

the girls are fightinggggg (and making out after)!!!!🗣️

[ivuravix]

His lack of charm and horrendous vibes have bewitched me

[ivuravix]

ahem

[ivuravix]

venom ghostsoap au!!! 🗣️

[ivuravix]

Daryl's teen years.

[ivuravix]

theres two (were)wolves inside you. john mactavish and simon riley.

[ivuravix]

Excuse me but I need to let anyone without tiktok know about Neil's replies, he's such a silly guy I might love him

[ivuravix]

"he can do no wrong" well actually i think he did a lot of wrong things, and that's specifically what attracted me to him in the first place

[ivuravix]

WAYS TO HELP PALESTINE 🇵🇸

uscpr.org

USCPR has ways for you to donate to Palestinians in need, plenty of information about the crimes against Palestine if you are uninformed or want to know more, along with protest information and pre-written scripts you can use to call your officials with

linktr.ee/MedicalAidforPalestinians.org

Site for donating for medical aid for Palestinians, along with a few other links to help take action and stay informed. Remember that even if you can't donate a lot, just a bit helps

matwprojectusa.org

Donation site for medical, food, and water aid in Palestine and other areas as well.

palestiniansocialfund.com

Unconditional funding for food growth in Palestine through grassroots

Not a link but something that can help: test "resist" to 50409 in reference to bill HR 3103, it is a bot that will help you write out a letter on your phone to send to congress, senate, and president if you'd rather not make a call!

Here is a list of some very major brands to boycott, which DOES MAKE A DIFFERENCE:

McDonalds, Starbucks, Disney, especially Disney+, Coco Cola, Victoria Secret, Puma, Nike, Walmart

There are MANY more brands that support the genocide, but these are the most major. Research is good!!

doctorswithoutborders.org

You can donate here to help provide support to the standing hospitals and health facilities in Gaza

pcrf.net

A children's relief fund that helps to provide crucial life-saving medical relief and aid

unrwausa.org

Medical support, trauma relief, and food assistance in Gaza! They also have an easy way for you to email congress

If you're unsure of how to check if something is false news or misinformation or not, apnews.com/ap-fact-check is a site that is stepping up to the misinformation given about Gaza and correcting other news sources!