itsjustmartina

[itsjustmartina]

“I can only be happy with you”

“Si no te hubieras ido sería tan feliz”

[itsjustmartina]

I have the headcanon that Pepito has, even if he doesn't notice it, a very sharp intuition and that is why he did not feel comfortable leaving his colorful armchair to his apá qRoier (Doied, actually) and, in contrast, he had total confidence with his apá qElMariana.

[itsjustmartina]

q!Cellbit has already noticed that something is off. But that doesn't mean he's falling out of love with q!Roier, let's try to see things from his perspective because then we'll notice that this is not what is happening:

q!Cellbit returned from purgatory, after which he himself said he had been fighting and killing to survive, every day the same thing, for weeks, months? he doesn't know. He lost track of time, time is a spiral, it seemed like an eternity but in the blink of an eye, he was back. Everything is still confusing and he doesn't remember things well, so after returning from almost hell he finally meets his husband again, smiling, happy? q!Roier knows how to hide his pain very well behind a smile, so after asking how he is and explaining that the choice to stay in purgatory was made because he thought that q!Roier would be better off away from him... he has a confirmation of this ?

This specific scene has a lot to analyze, first when q!Cellbit says he felt saudade [the strong feeling of missing, longing for someone or something] of q!Roier and apologize, he makes a joke and says "You left me alone culero", probably Doied thought that would be the most appropriate and safest reaction to fake being q!Roier, right? Maybe that would be correct if it weren't about such a serious situation that lasted so long, because we know that q!Roier told Richas that he felt like he was just existing, he was preparing a plan and doing everything to find his husband so that would definitely not be the appropriate reaction that q!Roier would have to this situation. Then q!Cellbit says "I thought you'd be better off without me and you..." at this moment his voice breaks, despite believing in what he's saying he doesn't want it to be real. "You're okay, aren't you?" it's as if you can perfectly feel the mix of sadness and fear that q!Cellbit's voice transmitted when saying this. "Yes, I'm fine! I'm feeling good, I'm feeling new!" - "See? Maybe that was the best thing to do" the confirmation that q!Cellbit was terrified of having, his sad tone of voice when he said that maybe being away from him was what brought the joy back to q!Roier it's heartbreaking. But q!Roier [Doied] doesn't seem to want to talk about these things for long, changing the subject, speaking only superficially or just going somewhere else.

Doied once again seems to have understood well how q!Roier works most of the time and with most people, but that's not all he is, that's not the essence of q!Roier. Doied cannot fake the deeper layers that make up q!Roier's existence, he becomes just a puppet with ready-made lines and repeated actions. And maybe that's why in a way he's also avoiding deep talks with q!Cellbit because if there's anyone capable of noticing that something isn't right with his husband, it's q!Cellbit... and that's exactly what's happening. Doied needs to divert topics and tries to move away because if he spends more time around him, the facade will become too obvious and this was shown to be true after two big things that Doied failed to replicate, the aspects of q!Roier's personality, and q!Cellbit noticed.

1- q!Roier would never attack q!Cellbit to hurt him. They already had a pvp fight, in which q!Roier lied about the result to make q!Cellbit feel better, they give each other shoulder pushes, light slaps on each other's arms and are very close physically, always talking close and with physical contact, they are known for always having their foreheads together when talking and this hasn't happened even once yet. During purgatory q!Roier really refused to kill q!Cellbit, constantly nodding his head to say no and stopping attacking but when he killed q!Cellbit, it was something that was soon explained as it was part of the event and it wasn't "real deaths" since things remained with them after they died, but even so, after this event q!Roier stopped smiling and demonstrated how much that affected him. There's even a moment that could almost be a parallel, in one of the days of purgatory, q!Roier had a very strong sword and asked q!Cellbit if he wanted it to be tested on him, this time q!Roier [Doied] simply started attacking q!Cellbit without even saying anything, and after q!Cellbit got very confused and said "Well... if that makes you happy", Doied chooses the safer answer "It's just a joke!"

2- q!Roier is extremely protective of his family. Upon seeing Pepito and Richas fighting a boss and q!Cellbit asking for help, Doied was just making jokes and took a while to actually try to help, something that q!Roier would never do, he would be the first to ask them to stay away and would be fighting to protect them.

So with everything that's happening now, what is q!Cellbit feeling and thinking? It's necessary to keep in mind that the key issue in all of this is something that is impossible for q!Cellbit to discover on its own. He doesn't even know about Doied's existence, q!Roier doesn't remember anything about his past and nothing was ever said about body swap, despite knowing that the federation carries out absurd tests and experiments, nothing like that had ever happened. However, there is something similar that may be considered in the future, the existence of something like q!Quackity and ElQuackity, perhaps at some point q!Cellbit will begin to suspect that perhaps this is not his husband because no matter how much he hates himself and has a very low self esteem, by now he must be confused as to why his husband is acting like this, but the love he feels for q!Roier is something that saved him, so it is strong enough to survive everything. I keep asking myself, what will happen when he discovers that the person in front of him has the same smile, the same eyes, the same body but the soul is not the same, that's not his soulmate.

[itsjustmartina]

I can't help but think about the detail that qDoied, while he did get iron, never properly got himself full armor (he said he would but in the end never did), plus he was much clumsier, compared to his twin brother, dealing with mobs and being knocked down several times. I dunno, it's a tidbit that maybe trivial in the end but if you watch the VOD of the first day of QSMP you can tell that qRoier had that issue covered as soon as he found enough iron by going down into the mines.

Speaking of META reasons it could be that he simply forgot, but it's a detail that if you're a regular ccRoier audience shocks a bit with his habitual way of starting a new survival (even more when you've seen him in hardcore series) so I find it a bit hard to believe that it wasn't on purpose this very beginner way to play.

qRoier knows how to survive outdoors, he's methodical in the mines and he's also good at fighting. qDoied has always lived inside the federation, he probably never practiced fighting so it would be quite normal for him to be so dull. I don't know, it's 6 am, I should be asleep and instead I'm here theorizing about cubitos.

[itsjustmartina]

The tall stands filled with books of varying sizes and colors immediately caught his attention, he ran to his nearest row of bookshelves and read the signs posted on them.

He noticed right away that they mentioned book titles, although it took him a little longer to realize that the respective authors of each one were island residents: there were a few interesting titles, others, the vast majority, were honestly stupid or ridiculous, and he was satisfied with his own and his incredible memory when he was able to pick up a reference to islanders with his brother, Roier, interacted more regularly.

And thinking specifically of him, the brown-haired young man began to read the remaining signs hoping to find the one that referred the book written by his brother.

When he finally found it, after having read all the titles on the second floor and climbed the spiral staircase, he could feel nothing but a deep boredom. Disappointed not with Roier, but with himself for having expected something brilliant from that idiot.

"How to Marry a Brazilian, by Roier."

He wrinkled his nose so noticeably that his expression of disgust was obvious to anyone who turned to look at him at that instant.

"I never wrote a book like that," he said annoyed, "I never wrote a book like that".

Sure, he would have written something related to the study of the human mind, he sighed, it was something that surely the useless Roier could never understand.

Resigned, he tore his gaze away from the wooden sign and continued reading the missing titles, hoping to find at least some actually Interesting.

"I would never write something like that…"

[okokok I KNOW that maybe it was just cc!Roier himself talking but I couldn't help but immediately relate it to qDoied DON'T JUDGE ME, it was my hyperfocused ass.]

[itsjustmartina]

🛑NOT SHIP RELATED🛑

cc!CELLBIT NOMINATED FOR THE STREAMER AWARDS

It was recently announced that cc!Cellbit is nominated in The Streamer Awards in two categories:

Best International Streamer

Best Streamed Series (Ordem Paranormal: Quarentena)

Cellbit is a big Brazilian streamer but in 2023 he received huge international recognition, using subtitle extensions in his live streams to make the content more accessible and encouraging people to speak their language in chat, also being part of the QSMP he often alternates between speaking in English and Spanish. Ordem Paranormal: Quarentena RPG is a special two-shot campaign from the Ordem Paranormal series (his project that began in 2020) in 2023 took first place in most views with 215,165 simultaneous live viewers. In fact, Roier is also part of the project, he plays the role of Luis M. participating in person in the second episode that was filmed at the studio in Brasil. Receiving this recognition internationally is something very remarkable so I think it's fair to share the nominations here, you can vote until February 7th using google or twitch accounts!

Here is the link to vote:

[itsjustmartina]

I mean, I know it's part of some qBBH pranks, but I find the fact that qRoier's castle is covered in snow and infested with cockroaches really heartbreaking.

[itsjustmartina]

LOS EXTRAÑO TANTO, BOLUDA 😭😭😭😭😭

I'm lost - q!Roier

Me too - q!Cellbit

Oh, but not anymore because now I'm with you - q!Roier

Ah, I will never be lost if I'm with you - q!Cellbit

[itsjustmartina]

No worries, I can trust you 100% - q!Roier

I trust him 100%, that's how we started and that's how we'll stay until the end - q!Cellbit

[itsjustmartina]

¿Y yo qué?

I'm genuinely curious about what path q!Roier will take to follow after what we know so far.

He is such a human character that I think he should be allowed not only to feel sad or lonely, but also to feel angry even selfish at least a little (plus we know that he has canonically allowed himself to feel resentful more than once).

He promised his husband that he would look for him and would not rest until he found him, and he is going to keep that promise because above all things he loves him, but wouldn't it be valid for him to feel lost, even abandoned, at first? wouldn't it be legitimate for this to affect his own perception? I think maybe even q!Roier could question his own importance in the eyes of others.

Because, if you think about it, yes, in the end it is always he who sees those he loves leave but it could also seem in his eyes that they decide so:

q!Spreen DECIDED to accept the pact with the devil and betray him. q!Quackity and q!Missa DECIDED not to believe him and take q!Spreen's side without question. Bobby DECIDED not to listen to him and go into the dungeon anyway and now q!Cellbit DECIDED to stay in purgatory, decided not to go with him… DECIDED not to say anything to him, denying him the opportunity to choose whether or not he wanted to follow him wherever that decision would take them.

It could very well be possible that, even if he is tremendously selfish or wrong, he questions if ever someone for the first time in his life will choose him first before anyone or anything else. This of course is not 100% true but he doesn't know that, I speak from what the character can perceive with the information he has. With what he himself has seen: his loved ones CHOOSING to abandon him.

And he would be able to understand all the reasons q!Cellbit had, he can empathize with them, he can even share them but that doesn't make it less painful, that doesn't make it easier to accept. That doesn't take away from the strength of the question that was born from his heart "What about me?" (¿Y yo qué?)

What about me? I'm still here I want to be happy too Look, my love I'm still here

[itsjustmartina]

I MISS TEAM CANGREJOS WAAA

[itsjustmartina]

Por qué me haces eso pepito 😭😭😭

pepito wrote "apa celbi"

[itsjustmartina]

Friendship.

A lot of things have been happening recently with qCellbit and qRoier, but there's something specific that's been hovering in my mind this whole week, something related to what I feel that is one of the pillars of their relationship.

"If you need a... friendship, I can give you a friendship"

I understand that when this happened, some people were afraid that maybe it meant they would end up in the friendzone as is usually the case. However, now qRoier and qCellbit are husbands and also best friends. And this is extremely important and fundamental for their relationship to have worked so much, a marriage that started out as a perfect match friendship (also mentioning that they consider themselves soulmates and that they were predestined to be together). Both really seemed to share the same braincells when they were together and then it started to happen even when they were apart, they simply understand each other... It's been almost 8 months since they met and started seeing each other basically almost every day, always trying to be in each other's presence, talking for hours, venting about their problems, going on adventures or just spending the day at home. And that's what gives me the most confidence in their marriage and the certainty that a bond so deep, a friendship so dear, a love so immeasurable will not be undone so quickly!

[itsjustmartina]

At first qRoier had the misconception that qCellbit abandoned him but he fought against that thought to devote his days and nights to finding a way to contact him. In the hope of bringing him back.

He sent the message, not even certain it would be received.

But he sent it anyway. In the middle of the rain. Spending sleepless nights. Sacrificing even his freedom and integrity.

I know qCellbit will also be able to overcome his own misconception that qRoier is better off without him and that he is happy. Then he'll look for a way to return to the island, maybe then he can get the message that his husband tried so hard to send. A message that literally cost him everything.

"I can only be happy with you" qCellbit told qRoier before they were married, but now it was Roier who only thought of that while looking for him "Si no te hubieras ido sería tan feliz"

[itsjustmartina]

my france special intrest brought him to me and my brains never been the same

[itsjustmartina]

sensitive topic for me high chances to immediate cry when mentioned: pepito.

[itsjustmartina]

JUST A GUAPODUOSHIPPER PLAYLIST SONG #25

HISTORIA DE UN AMOR - LUIS MIGUEL

Ya no estás más a mi lado, corazón En el alma sólo tengo soledad Y si ya no puedo verte ¿Por qué Dios me hizo quererte Para hacerme sufrir más? Siempre fuiste la razón de mi existir Adorarte para mí fue religión En tus besos yo encontraba El calor que me brindaba El amor y la pasión Es la historia de un amor Como no hay otro igual Que me hizo comprender Todo el bien, todo el mal Que le dio luz a mi vida Apagándola después Ay, qué vida tan obscura Sin tu amor no viviré

You are no longer by my side, my dear heart In my soul I only have loneliness And if I can no longer see you Why did God make me love you To make me suffer even more? You were always the reason for my existence Adoring you for me was religion In your kisses I found The warmth that gave me Love and passion Is the story of a love Like no other equal That made me understand All the good, all the bad That gave light to my life And then extinguished it Oh, what a dark life Without your love I will not live

This is definitely the saddest wedding anniversary in Spiderbit history. We still haven't heard from either of them, but I wanted to share this song that reminds me so much of q!Roier's perspective in the last days he was seen on the island: devastated, with no will to live, remembering how much he loved his husband and how much he wanted to see him again.

Also, as the song says, their love story is one of a kind. To such an extent that it has always been an inspiration for others on the island who would like to have by their side a person who loves them with the same devotion that q!Roier loves q!Cellbit and vice versa.