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My heart busts a nut every time someone tells me they saw something and thought of me

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Topic- monogamy is overrated, authenticity is better.

Happy New Year. I brought the new year in with my family. I booked a Vegas trip and communicated with my boo he wasn’t invited and to enjoy his New Year how he wanted (which would be with his family or a lady of his choice it really didn’t matter to me). I Got back to my nigga so we could enjoy OUR new year celebration and let me tell you, It was nothing short of incredible. But Before we could indulge, appreciate, and connect with one another we had to address how a lame ass bitch (my words not his) attempted to ruin our night and exactly how it was done. 

There were a plethora of clues left for me to find so I would know that a bitch or two (shit maybe even three) had been there and possibly fucking. This nigga is a smooth nigga so the clues weren’t, nor would they ever be left just sitting for me to find them. He always cleans up thoroughly after one woman leaves his place or before the next one pulls up (unless he wants you to see that someone was there and he’ll leave all the evidence and just wait for you to ask). Instead of throwing it all away per usual he put all the articles that were left behind in a bag, showed them to me, told me where they were perfectly placed in order for me to stumble across them… I wasn’t mad, and we laughed. 

Some of the contents-

An underwire ( one that clearly didn’t just come out on its own. It was pulled out and placed by the microwave)

A tag from a bra and panty set ( not the price tag

but the label tag, he bought this for her, he likes to see women looking sexy at ALL times, instead of appreciating the gift she ripped off the tag that specifically said underwear and left it to blend in with the covers)

Two corners of ripped price tags 

( no big deal but he didn't have any new clothes so I would know the tags weren't his) 

There was more but who cares

We LAUGHED, We rolled up some good ass weed, poured up some drinks, and then we fucked multiple times until I passed out.

See the SIDE BITCH mindset is dead over here. ( before you continue on, 

DISCLAIMER- please understand that I AM FULLY AWARE  this is an unfair, possibly tainted,  completely based off of my own life experiences, personal opinion, and borderline biased blanket coat statement of the entire male population. Oh well!  I’ve  had the pleasure of dealing with more unfaithful men than I have had with men who are faithful. I mean truly faithful, they know how to have fun, communicate with other women while still respecting their partner, and even in the face of temptation be able to keep their dick in their pants, better yet they don't even allow flirty conversation. But those men have been far and few between.  Now here is why I am no longer on a hunt for my “prince charming.”

Men cheat! Men have sex with other women. Men ENJOY the game of getting to know new women. Men enjoy feeling like a new bitch is interested in what they got going on. Men enjoy the game of flirting, meeting a bitch at the bar, store, or gym and working her out of her panties with the least amount of effort required. I mean I feel like most women get this part, but most women don't know how to play their part in this game. AKA they don’t know how to stay unfucked. So the nigga hits on the first night, 5th night, or even after he takes her out for a few drinks two weeks after meeting her, then he goes back to his main bitch and hopes that she remains unaware of his rendezvous.

I realize this, I am aware of this, and I have adjusted to this, (mainly because I'm almost 26 and I refuse to get played AGAIN) and I am over being lied to about what the man I have chosen to fuck with is doing. I have decided to reject the “dream” of marriage and monogamy, (don't get me wrong, not all men are dogs. Some men find a woman and they are happy with just her forever other men stop chasing woman when they lose energy. aka as they get older ) instead I want a life partner who wants to win together and achieve individual success as well as being a successful team. 

So instead of insisting on monogamy. I insist on respect, open levels of communication, honesty, making sure, mutual agreements of what our relationship will be, and keeping one another happy. 

Call me stupid, claim that I'm lowering my standards, shit you can even say that I don't know my worth. But instead of pretending my nigga is Prince Charming I keep it real with myself and I understand that he’s a good man who simply loves bitches and I’m a woman who simply is happy with him REGARDLESS of who he might use for a quick nut from time to time. One thing is for sure, I’d rather have an authentic relationship that may seem off the wall and unacceptable to others vs. pretending I’ extremely happy with my partner but I know that he has 5 different women rotating in and out when I’m not around and he is lying to me about it. 

Life is real, do you want to live in a fairy tale and be cheated on or would you rather have an authentic connection with 1, 2, maybe 3 different people who you can confide in, be 100% yourself, and be honest about your emotional, spiritual, and sexual needs. 

Indulge in YOUR pleasures

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- The Aware one. BET'HER

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Check out @Blueraydre’s Tweet:

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She came in so QUICK. Turned her head, looked once, and then split.

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Truth.

I am happy I am unbothered I am loyal I am giving I am built I am accepting I am better.

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If you don’t get this excited about giving your man some head then you ain’t really bout that life 😁.

Good Vibes Only!

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She did that.

She went out there and got to it. No excuses, no tears, no drama. You gonna be lookin back on this shit like nigga you blew. How did you let her stray so far? How did you allow her to slip away? That bitch would kill for you even in her purest of days. She would lie to all her friend, she would change her outlook, she adopted your philosophy, and she only had eyes for you. Tell me what could have been so wrong ? Either way she DID THAT. When she was in a crunch she make something come from nothing. How about that for a magic trick. If you watch the second act, you'll be just as impressed.

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Sick joke.

This has to be a sick joke. Someone just want me dead. They ransacked my car Lookin at my shit scratching my head. How am I supposed to explain this shit ? One thing after another... And. I didn't even get any dick

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Pimpin 101

You gotta mess with bitches who about they shit and appreciate you for the man you are. You gotta fuck with bitches who ARENT looking for the quick dollar. But instead looking for the consistent dollar. If you gonna get out here and get the money with a nigga you have to make that decision. You can't just be out here trying to get all the money with anyone. Bitch you gotta do it right

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🍯 🐝 🍫 👑 out and about

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Fine shine

I didn't think I'd be ok. I had gotten so used to you being here. Your scent, your touch, your blonde bowl cut. My addiction to you was the most intense I had ever experience. More intense than the plate. How could it not be after all those dates? After all his eking nights ? After all those early mornings? Any nigga I meet now seems to be boring! We were Zooming through streets moving really fast. Then we would head back to the house and you'd tap that ass. Now I'm home all alone. Laying in my bed, I have to get into the zone, I have to make myself moan. I knew I would struggle wth sex after you, for the first time in my life I have reached new heights. The one to help make me cum was no longer my go to. The one to make me shake could no longer take me on dates. The one to make me bust a nut on any part of his body... Fuck I could keep going on and on.... But I don't have to. Because I'm OK. Because your not gonna stay away. So although I didn't think I would be ok.... I am fine. With him or with out him I will still shine.

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I could post every screen shot.

Check me out live Monday bigihtbdiwb town riverside. I will be reading me new piece

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Before the story is twisted.

I walked away 🙌🏾 In the most beautiful way 🔥 And not because I wanted to 🤷🏾‍♀️ But I can’t continue to be lied to🙅🏾 So I made the decision to disconnect ��️ Slowly extracting my feelings cutting the net📌 Looking at his text make me sick 🏨 Laughing in my head like how does he get away with it 👀 Lie after lie he tells, like baby im sorry my phone died, I crashed hard, I fell asleep, they are all tales because head laid up with me. 📚 So maybe in the future we can try it again♻️ But take it back to when reciprocation was in🔄 A continuous loop of love, and fun 🎦 Cause this extra drama as of lately has me way past done 🆓 👏🏾👏🏾

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I haven't been writing

Shifting through what's real vs. what's fake has gotten hard. New inspiration in the way. But I like to write based off of true stories and it's hard to do that with people lying. Wishing the best to all y'all 😭😭

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I would love to wrap your chocolate legs around me

I just saw this. Thank you 😘 they are soft and thick. Perfect for wrapping, smothering, and massaging.