infjoanna

[infjoanna]

“why are you so upset?” idk man. maybe bc i have i get super upset disorder

[infjoanna]

[infjoanna]

sometimes the executive function fairy godmother finally shows up, whacks you, and then you’ve got to run around like cinderella on a midnight deadline trying to get things done before time runs out and your brain makes it illegal again

[infjoanna]

[infjoanna]

this may not work for everyone, but the best advice i’ve ever heard was something like “if you’re struggling with something, make it easier.” that sounds like bullshit, but it actually helps me a lot.

i struggled to brush my teeth for years. i still do! but i made it easier for myself by paying attention to my needs. what kept me from brushing? part of it was the sensory experience, so i switched to an electric one and it works much better for me. part of it was having to stand in the bathroom for two minutes, so i moved my brush and toothpaste into my bedroom, where i lay or sit in bed and look at my phone while i use them. this didn’t solve the entire problem for me, but it made things so much easier.

i can’t stand having a shirt collar, so i wear mostly tank tops, but for the shirts i really like, i usually just cut the neck part out. yeah it’s not super pretty, so i keep some of my shirts uncut if i really like them for their look, but it helps for my every day clothes. (my mom taught me this one.)

showering and doing dishes are two things that make me want to die from boredom(? i don’t really have a term for that crushing boredom/dread of executive dysfunction and trauma responses). now i have a speaker for my shower and headphones for chores, and i just listen to music or podcasts. it makes things easier, even if it isn’t enough every time.

just. look at what you’re struggling with and think about what specific part is bothering you most. if there’s an easy fix, take it. even if it only makes things slightly more manageable, you deserve that. you deserve an easier way to do things that you struggle with. even if the solution seems silly or weird, is it hurting anyone? is it making anything worse? is it better to brush your teeth in bed or not at all?

[infjoanna]

[infjoanna]

Really frickin rude that I have to make so many appointments to get treated for Can't Make Appointments Disease

[infjoanna]

Neurotypicals will be like “I know you have a disability that affects your ability to stay organized, manage your time properly, socialize, or control what you’re able to think about or focus on, but that’s not an excuse to have trouble staying organized, managing your time properly, socializing, or controlling what you need to think about or focus on.” And then demand that they aren’t ableist. I’m tired.

[infjoanna]

hey I'm sorry I stopped in the middle of that sentence my brain decided to flush its cache and I totally forgot what this conversation was

[infjoanna]

“I’m not going to do the thing because I don’t view it as important.” ← Conscious decision made of your own free will.

“I want to do the thing because I view it as important, but trying to get myself to do the thing creates the same reaction as trying to put my hand on a hot stove would.” ← Executive dysfunction, a physical health problem that doesn’t answer to your own free will.

“Trying to get myself to do the thing creates the same reaction as trying to put my hand on a hot stove would. This must mean I don’t actually want to do the thing and I’m just tricking myself into thinking I do.” ← No, that’s still executive dysfunction, but you’re having brainworms about it.

[infjoanna]

[infjoanna]

[infjoanna]

[infjoanna]

im just built different (unstable)

[infjoanna]

I don't believe in casual romance. I believe in mutual obsession and extreme jealousy mixed with possession

[infjoanna]

Maybe she’s born with it, maybe it’s her dads fault.

[infjoanna]

Actually upon further inspection that shit really hurted my feelings