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Lupin, after learning about Zantetsuken: So it’s true? There really are demons out there?

Goemon: You thought there weren’t?

Lupin: Well...

Jigen: I dunno, man. I thought it might've been one of those made-up things that adults tell kids. Like vitamins.

Lupin: Uh, Jigen, vitamins are a real thing.

Jigen: Well, now I’m thinking maybe they could be.

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Zenigata: You know, sometimes I think you don't take me seriously.

Lupin: Really? There are times you think I do?

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"Every store sells weapons if you're creative enough."

Jigen

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Goemon: The heart wants what it wants.

Goemon: And what it wants is blood.

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Maybe instead of asking someone why they’re 'so dressed up', ask yourself why you didn’t wear a better outfit.

Fujiko

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Goemon: I don’t understand, Lupin. Why would you not allow us to meet your friend?

Lupin: Because you can be slightly... judgemental.

Goemon: Hmph. What a ridiculous thing to say. Name one time I’ve been judgemental.

Lupin: ... Ok. [Donning a Goemon impression and a serious look] "What a ridiculous thing to say."

Goemon: Ah, I see. Mere seconds ago.

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Zenigata: Well done, Yata! You’re handling this whole thing rather well.

Yata: I’m -- I’m really not, sir.

Zenigata: Then you’re freaking out in the most useful way possible. Keep it up.

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Jigen: Cancelling plans is ok.

Jigen: Staying home to cook is ok.

Jigen: Disappearing for a bit to get your life together is ok.

Jigen: Resurfacing in a foreign country with a new name 5 years later is ok.

Jigen: It's called self care!

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What kind of world would it be if everyone who committed a silly little crime went to prison? Complete madness!

Lupin

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Lupin: Listen, Fujiko, about your present? I was gonna get you a diamond wristwatch with a gold band and two rubies on the side —

Fujiko: Oh, Lupin, you shouldn’t have!

Lupin: Oh, it’s alright, I didn’t.

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Zenigata: Alright, there’s various ways to resolve conflict --

Jigen: Gun.

Goemon: A sword.

Lupin: Theivery.

Fujiko: Blackmail.

Zenigata:

Zenigata: Why do I even bother?

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Lupin, storming into the common room: Where is my coffee cup with the mold in it?!

Goemon: I threw it away. It was a health hazard and should not be anywhere near a living area.

Lupin: Wha -- why?! I was breeding that mold!

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Be the hot sexy single that you want to see in the area.

Fujiko

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Jigen: So, Lupin, you have a plan to get us out of this place alive?

Lupin: Sort of. The idea starts with "run for it" and generally goes downhill from there.

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Lupin: I promised Zenigata that if he helped us, we wouldn’t do anything illegal!

Fujiko: Why would you lie to him like that?!

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Goemon: The world is a cruel place, my friend. Everywhere I go, all I see is death, and destruction...

Jigen, looking at the trail of slashed property damage left behind: Probably ‘cuz you're the one causing it.

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Whatever I did, I have proof I didn’t do it.

Lupin III