importanceofbeingernie
The Importance of Being Ernest
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importanceofbeingernie · 3 years ago
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mostlovedgreengrass·:
ERNIE
Astoria was having a good time. Normally, she would have stood in the corner of the room and silently judged people, but it was New Year’s Eve. It was basically a requirement that you get pissed off your rocker tonight. ( and she needed it honestly; she never let loose like this ) She left the outskirts of the dance floor ( the grinding pit seemed to be in the middle of the floor ) and made her way over to the chaises to catch her breath. On her way, she spotted Ernie of all people. Quickly, she shuffled over to him and plopped down on top of him. “Hi,” she greeted him brightly. “And before you say you don’t swing that way, I know. You just looked comfortable.” She offered him a grin. ( he said he was a friend; this is what friends did right? ) “Have I mentioned that your dimples are really cute?” she asked. Then she squished his cheeks between her thumb and middle finger. “Just so squeezable.” // @importanceofbeingernie
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Ernie was responsible. He had himself one drink and as soon as he felt the bit of a buzz, he felt that he was good to go. Nothing more or less and he was having a good time as is. As normal, he was using his charming personality to entertain just about anyone who decided to sit near his table until a familiar face crawled onto his lap. Clearly, Astoria was drunk. So drunk, in fact that she was being nice to Ernie. And that was the thing that made Ernie the most concerned. If she was being this touchy feely with him, who knows who or what Astoria could get herself into. It wasn’t that Ernie felt that she couldn’t take care of herself. If anything, he knew very well that Astoria would draw a very firm line with anyone who didn’t meet her standards. But, she was on his lap talking about his dimples as if they were friends, something she insisted that they were not. Against the squished cheeks, he offered no smile to show off his dimples. “I think its time for you to go home,” he said. “Do you need help getting there? Sleep this off?��
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importanceofbeingernie · 3 years ago
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hvrrypvttr·:
Harry looks at Ernie’s hand, debates taking it for only a second, and decides not to. He has no reason to force himself to be polite right now and he’s not going to. “You literally just said ‘ew’ under your breath,” he says in a dry monotone. “You realise it would have actually been less weird and rude to just ignore me or something? And no, I’m not playing Quidditch anymore.” A pang of irritation, but that’s just because he misses it. And that, at least, is not Ernie’s fault. He wonders vaguely whether Ernie truly does not read any magical news or if he’s simply so bitter he feels the need to act as if the Prophet isn’t spewing out garbage about Harry’s life at least once a week. “I needed a change of pace so I’m actually breeding Blast-Ended Skrewts these days. Doesn’t pay well, but it’s really fascinating.”
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Ernie’s face fell from it’s smile to a flat line. He was not trying to be rude, and to be called as such got under his skin. Maybe this was the reason why he disliked Potter so much. Even when he was trying to be polite to him, Harry found a way to sour the moment. Nonetheless, Ernie decided to ignore the nasty words and continue on the conversation. He was the better man after all. The flat line on his face turned to a small frown. Even if he hated Potter, it is rather dreadful that he no longer played Quidditch. Anyone with half a brain knew that it meant a lot to him and was a dream that Harry had had. “All things happen for a reason, one could say,” he stated with earnest. “You’re braver than I am because I hate bugs and bug like things, so I compliment you on that one, Potter,” he said with a small smile. 
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importanceofbeingernie · 3 years ago
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blurb night!
send me one of the below and I will either write a ‘one shot’ or starter prompt. For a starter prompt, please leave the name of the character who ‘prompted’ the conversation <3
RANDOM “The skirt is short on purpose.” “So why did I have to punch that guy?” “I may have accidentally sort of adopted five cats.” “Please put me down it’s just a sprained ankle” “So what if I broke my arm I’m still doing it.” “Why exactly do you need chloroform at 2AM?” “I’m like 75% this won’t explode on us.” “You need to stop leaving dead bodies in my kitchen.” “I understand the whole sleep talking thing but what I don’t understand is the princess dragon dream and why I’m in it.” “I’m sorry that I got way too into playing house and accidentally kissed you passionately. “I shouldn’t be in love with you!” “It’s not fair!” “I could kill you right now!” “Knock it off!” “Screw you!” “You’re a complete moron!” “I love this song!” “Bring that here!” “I hate you!” “I’m pissed off!” “Make me!” “I wish you’d never been born!” “I bought ice cream!” “Kiss my ass!” “Shut up!” “I can’t do it anymore!” “Take me home!” “Just kiss me already! “I can’t be in love with you!” “I can’t believe this!” “Piss off!” “I wish things were that simple!” “I love you!” “Jump off a bridge!” “You’re so hot!” “I have something to tell you…” “I think I’m pregnant.” “They died.” “I want you to be the Maid of Honor/Best Man.” “I want a divorce.” “I’m leaving you.” “I want you back.” “I got a pet!” “I won the lottery!” “I’m in love with you.” “Why are you suing me?” “We need to get out of town… Now.” “I’m going to prison.” “I quit!” “I was fired.” “I got a promotion!” “So… You know how I went out gambling last night?” “I cheated on you.” “You did WHAT?”
DARK/ DARK-ESQUE “How could you do this to me!?” “I trusted you!” “Is that supposed to scare me?” “Why are you pointing that gun at me?” “Let me go!” “Who did this to you?” “You’re in my way.” “I thought you were dead!” “Help me!” “Long live the king.” “What did they do to you?” “What have you done?” “I don’t care what you do to me, I’ll never tell you!” “They’ll kill you!” “I hate you.”
ARGUMENT STARTERS “Do you ever shut up?” “You’re such a loud mouth” “You shouldn’t have said that” “Fuck you” “Step on a lego” “Get bent” “Shut your mouth before I shut it for you” “It isn’t up for debate” “Don’t question my orders” “I recognize that you have reached a decision, but given that it is a stupid ass decision I have elected to ignore it” “That is the worst idea i’ve ever heard” “Who writes your plans, the village idiot?” “That’s mine” “Give it back” “Don’t touch my stuff” “That’s not yours” “Just leave already” “The door is over there” “I cannot deal with your bullshit right now” “I have my orders” “You have your orders” “Make me” “Don’t tempt me” “I hate you” “You are infuriating” “Just shut up already” “That doesn’t even make sense” “Bite me” “Eat me” “Kiss my ass” “Just admit i’m right” “Just admit you’re wrong” “You are being ridiculous” “That’s irrational” “Listen to me” “That’s not what I meant and you know it” “Don’t yell at me” “That’s it. End of discussion” “I don’t believe you” “Don’t look at me like that” “What’s with that look?” “Go away”
SEXUAL TENSION/ SEXUAL/ SUGGESTIVE “Make me.” “Bite me.” “If you say so…” “Kiss my ass.” “Did something just happen? You’re not turned on anymore.” “Hey, I’m open minded.” “I think it’s about time we stop avoiding the obvious.” “I saw that. You just checked me out.” “You know, when this is over, we should really have angry sex.” “Tell all those other guys/girls you don’t need them ‘cause you got me.” “Don’t give me that face, it’s so cute I might not be able to hold back.” “Boobs are really just squishy pillows.” “If you don’t get turned on by having your neck kissed somethings wrong with you.” “Blasphemy! Sex solves everything.” “I platonically want to have sex with you. No big deal.” “Wow, you’re hot.” “Oh, don’t mind me. Just enjoying the view.” “You know, those/that (list body part) of yours are/is pretty distracting.” “Hot damn.” “So, you come here often?” “Well, well. My night just got better.” “Is that a wand in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?” “You have got a great ass.” “Hey, I’m open minded.” “You enjoying the view over there?” “You can have me any way you’d like, baby.” “You wanna move this conversation someplace more private?” “I’m off in a few minutes, you know.” “It’s been a long day. Why don’t we help each other unwind?” “I think it’s about time we stop avoiding the obvious.” “What do we have here?” “I see someone’s happy to see me.” “How do you want me?” “I’m sure we can put those lips to better use.” “God, you’re perfect.” “I really like a man who’s good with his hands.” “You. Me. Sex. Now.” “I’d be more than happy to show you a good time, if you’re looking for one.” “I saw that. You just checked me out.” “You look real good in that suit/dress/skirt/outfit.” “You wanna help me out of this ___?” (Insert article clothing here.) “Can I keep you?” “You’re such a tease.” “Oh my, looks like I/you dropped something.” “I love it when you talk dirty.” “I can’t stop thinking about your hands on me.” “I really want to take you home and get you out of all those clothes.” “It’s like you want to ruin men/women for me.”
CUTSIE/ FLUFF “I’m sorry, what were you saying? I keep getting lost in your eyes” “You’re beautiful, you know that?” “If I could, I would kiss away all your scars” “You’re all I’ve ever wanted” “You’re…magnificent” “I think I might be falling in love with you” “Everything about you can be described in one word. Perfect” “My life would be so boring if you weren’t in it” “I have something to say. Three words, eight letters. I…got food.” “He/She is nothing compared to you” “I need to choose a pet name for you. Any ideas?” “I hate seeing you unhappy so now I’m going to do everything I can to cheer you up. Even if it means making a fool of myself” “Your hair is so soft…” “You’re so cute when you pout like that!” “Just relax, I’ll wash your hair for you.” “I’m not going to stop poking you until you give me some attention.” “What, does that feel good?” “HA! I found a weak-spot on you, didn’t I?” “Are you wearing my shirt?” “You are ridiculously comfortable…” “I’ve had a rough day and honestly all I want right now is a drink and someone to cuddle with…” “You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this…” “You’re beautiful, you know that?” “Aren’t they beautiful?” “These stars are nothing compared to the ones I’ve seen in your eyes.” “Shooting star, make a wish.” “It’s actually a comet, but I’ll still make one.” “Imagine if it could always be this way, even in the city.” “Never thought something so beautiful could exist in nature…” “Wouldn’t it be cool to name a star after yourself?” “Y'know, your roof may not be the safest place for us to stargaze.” “I wouldn’t mind falling asleep out here. “You weren’t supposed to laugh! I’m so embarrassed!” “You’ve been glued to the couch for 3 days. I’m worried about you.” “I’ve had a rough day. Time for Netflix and takeout.” “Are you wearing my clothes?” “You look beautiful tonight,baby.” “Let’s skip dinner and go straight to dessert.” “I’m leaving tomorrow. So kiss me like you mean it.” “I don’t want to ruin what we have.” “Trust me. This will feel great.”
ANGSTY “Are you feeling alright? You don’t look it.” “Will you tell me what the fuck is going on?” “Don’t give me that look! It wasn’t my fault!” “You should probably sit down for this.” “Please tell me you forgive me!” “I can’t live without you!” “Oh god, It was a mistake coming here… I’m sure of it.” “What the hell happened to you?!” “Is this what a dislocated shoulder feels like?!” “How could you do this to me?!” “Wake up! Wake up!!! You’re having a nightmare!” “I don’t want to leave you, but you’re not really giving me another option.” “I came as soon as I could! Did he/she get to you already?” “I don’t know whether I want to do this. I don’t know whether I CAN do this.” “Do you remember anything?” “You have to tell me who did this to you!” “No, no, I’m not alright. I’m definitely not alright.” “What’s your fucking problem?!” “Are you crying?” “I’m leaving. And I’m not intending to come back.” “Did you drink the whole bottle while tripping? Seriously?” “Do you have a deathwish or something? Jesus!” “When’s the last time you slept?” “Please, just…say something. Anything.” “I’m sorry, okay?! Just talk to me!” “Don’t ignore me. Please.” “Don’t you have anything to say for yourself?” “What, I’m not even worth speaking to anymore?” “Just tell me what I did wrong!” “Could you sing for me? Just once more.” “Don’t shut me out like this!” “Is this how you want it to end? With nothing?!” “I thought you of all people would be different.” “I’m not angry. I’m disappointed.” “I can’t believe this. You always turn everything into such a disaster!” “I’d expected a lot more from you.” “Stop being so selfish! You’re ruining everything for everyone.” “You’re such a disappointment to the family.” “Why is everything in life actually so disappointing? You get yourself excited every time, only to be let down, time and time again.” “You’re not disappointing! Just… surprising.” “I thought you cared about me. Someone who cares about someone else doesn’t let them down like you just did.” “You could’ve tried harder!” ”I’m not going to lie… I am disappointed.” “No no! You’re great, but the sex was just really disappointing.” “Honestly, you’re the biggest disappointment of my life.” “You weren’t there for me when I needed you. Why do you expect me to be here for you now you need me?” “I had higher expectations of this.” “I had higher expectations of you.” “Why would you do that?” “Why don’t you say that to my face?” “I can’t look at you anymore.” “What’s wrong with you?” “What are you going to do about it?” “I’d burn you alive if I could.” “I thought you loved me…” “I can’t- I just can’t anymore.” “I cried all night because of you, and the worst part is that you don’t even care.” “Is what you have really worth fighting for?” “I don’t love you. I never did.” “I don’t want you anymore.” “You actually thought I loved you? You must be kidding. I never even liked you.” “You were easier to fool than I thought.” “Why don’t you crawl back into the dark corner you came from?” “I believed you. I trusted you. I shouldn’t have.” “Don’t you dare play innocent. You got your hands just as dirty as mine.” “You used to be such a good boy/girl. Thank god you met me, or you would have stayed like that forever.” “I honestly thought that we were friends, but friends don’t hurt each other the way you hurt me.” “Just leave already. You’re worthless to me.” “I knew you would fail, it was just a matter of time.” “Oh, that was supposed to be a secret? Oops.” “I’ll help you this one time, then I never want to hear from you again.” “I didn’t invite you. Don’t make a scene.” “You ruined my life. Why would I be happy to see you?”
DEPRESSION/ MENTAL HEALTH RELATED “You can at least pretend to be happy.” “Why didn’t you tell anyone what you were going through?” “You did this to yourself?” “Hey, hey. Calm down, okay? What got you in such a state?” “Why have you been hiding this for years?” “You could’ve told me you felt like this.” “Trust me, I hate myself more than you do, so yelling at me really isn’t going to change anything!” “I don’t know what to say, I’m sorry.” “I can tell you you’re not alone, because I’ve felt like this too.” “I don’t think I will get better. I felt the same five years ago and I’ve spoken to plenty of therapists in the meantime. I think it’s just a part of who I am.” “What are you feeling?” “I know there’s nothing I can say to make it better, so maybe you should just let me hug you for a while?” “I’m supposed to believe this is you being sober? I’m not buying it.” “How many glasses have you had?!” “If you want to keep smoking, you’ll have to go outside.” “You promised I wouldn’t find you like this again!” “Have you been drinking? It’s not even noon!” “Let me smell your breath.” “I thought that place was going to make you better…” “You know if you go on like this, I’ll have to send you back to rehab. Is that what you want?” “Can you remember when we didn’t need this yet?” “Have you any idea how much it hurts me to see you like this?!”
MEETINGS “Excuse me. Is anyone sitting here?” “Are you meeting someone here? Because.. I think I’m that person.” “Did that asshole just cut in line up there? Jeez.” “So is it always this busy, or did I just pick a great day to come in?” “–Sorry! I didn’t mean to touch your butt.” “I like your dress/shirt/hat/etc.!” “Tough luck, buddy.” “Hey, are you all right? You look upset.”
PHYSICAL INJURY “Ow…I think I broke something.” “Can I lean on you for a second? My ankle’s bothering me.” “Do you have any bandages?” “Oh god, that hurts so much.” “Everything hurts. Seriously, I think I broke myself.” “I can’t walk.” “Is is bad that I can’t feel my legs?” “I’ve never felt this much pain in my life.” “Are you okay? Are you bleeding?” “Here, let me help, I took a course on this a few years ago.” “Does anyone know first-aid?” “That’s a pretty bad bruise, man.” “You definitely need to go to the hospital.” “Where’d you get all these cuts?” “Lie down. Sit somewhere, you need to rest.” “I’ll get the ice.” —————————– this has been edited to suit protego-hq purposes and also to remove certain triggers and topics members are not comfortable with. If there is anything on this list which you don’t like, please message admin to edit further.
Have fun
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importanceofbeingernie · 3 years ago
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hvrrypvttr·:
Harry’s never really been a big fan of Ernie Macmillan. Pompous and gossipy and with a voice that grates on his nerves, the only reason Harry had grown somewhat fond of him in their later years at Hogwarts was because ever since their second year, Ernie had at least supported him in most things even when most people were quoting Daily Prophet articles at him about how he’d lost his head. It was usually not in a terribly likable way, but he’s also no Zacharias Smith, so. If anything, really, Ernie doesn’t take up much mental space in Harry’s head, especially not in the last five years.
“Good to see you, Ernie,” Harry says tonelessly. “Something wrong?”
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Ernie never had a reason to hate Potter. If someone were to put him on the spot and ask him for a reason, even a simple one, Ernie would just have to shrug. He wasn’t going to lie and make up something to dislike Potter over, but he could never pinpoint why he disliked the guy. There wasn’t a transgression or incident that caused him to have this vendetta against him. If anything, he seemed like a great guy. 
He locked eyes with Harry, failing to realize that his comment was louder than he anticipated. Ernie pushed on a large smile on his face. Even if he was not one to lie, it was even less of him to be openly rude to someone. Well, at least consciously rude. “Potter!” he started, offering a handshake. “Last I heard of you, you were a Quidditch star, right? How’s that going?”
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importanceofbeingernie · 3 years ago
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sing-omuse·:
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Colin knew who this was. Hell, he even had a dueling round him once during a session of the DA. He wasn’t surprised that this man couldn’t really recall him. If he recalled Ernie correctly, he was always very preoccupied with something else: usually himself. If that was the case today - well, Colin couldn’t necessarily blame him.   “Do you?” Colin mused with a perked brow directed at Ernie, as he straightened up from behind the store counter to stand at his full height. He reached over for the pressed bookmark resting on the edge and tucked it into the book he had been reading.  “Do tell.”  
Ernie did his best to try to remember everyone’s name, but when it came to being the little social butterfly that he was, it was hard to keep all of them straight. When you were just as sociable and popular as him, remembering all of your friends’ names wasn’t an easy task. But he knew he knew this boy, and he was going to figure out the name to go with him.
He turned his head to think. The smile never left his cheeks. “Callum?” he started before shaking his head and giving the man a light nudge. “No, no... Colin, right? It’s Colin.”
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importanceofbeingernie · 3 years ago
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mostlovedgreengrass·:
When Astoria saw Ernie strut through the door to her office, she wanted to slam her head into her desk. This stupid Hufflepuff had been sending her the most annoying fire messages for the last hour and half, claiming to be her friend or some shit. ( honestly she barely knew him except when he came into her office and left things ) Glaring, she leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest. Her office had been full of imbeciles this week and she was not enjoying it. ( was a little peace too much to ask for? ) 
“Here, MacMillan,” she said as she tossed his ( fully intact ) jacket at him. With a disgruntled look, she glanced down at the jacket he offered her. She thought she might puke. “Why would I want to have matching clothes with you?” The thought utterly disgusted her. ( matching with anyone disgusted her ) Who did this man think he was? 
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He cocked his head to the side. Not only second ago, did Ernie say that it would be tacky if he brought her a matching jacket. He would never do something that would betray fashion rules. Matching was reserved for dates and with consent from both parties. “That’s where you clearly didn’t hear me right, Tori,” Ernie replied with an extending small on her face. The creases of his dimples deepened. “This isn’t matching. It’s just the same brand. And it’s a gift. I’m being nice to you.”
Ernie looked down at the jacket and offered a shrug. “If you don’t want the gift, luckily I still have the receipt in case you didn’t like it or that I got you the wrong size. No harm no foul, right?” the smile stayed on his life, oblivious to everything around him.
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importanceofbeingernie · 3 years ago
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@sing-omuse​
Ernie considered himself a social butterfly when he was in Hogwarts. Granted, he did not hang out much with the Gryffindors nor did he like Potter’s crowd. But, he was social and always trying his best to put on a smile for anyone who wanted to talk to him. On top of that, he was part of Dumbledore’s Army, which allowed him to grow his friendship circle outside of the few Hufflepuffs he kept as his closest of friends. Making rounds to give presents to his friends, he figured it would be best to amplify the good spirit and support smaller stores than Flourish and Blotts with a smaller store called Tales of Times.
It wasn’t often that he could not remember someone’s name when he approached them, especially since he could see where he knew them from. A miniature version of the man who stood in front of him was clearly in his head complete with the little Gryffindor uniform he used to wear as a boy. Yet, Ernie struggled to put a name to the attendant at the independent book store he just discovered. “Don’t tell me,” he started, the smile curling on his lips. “It’s coming back to me. I know this face and the name that goes with it.”
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importanceofbeingernie · 3 years ago
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@mostlovedgreengrass​
The Slytherins just needed someone to get passed their rough edges and cold eyes. And Ernie appointed himself as the perfect person for the task. He would consider himself somewhat of an expert- if not an expert entirely. His mother was a Slytherin from a family of interesting characters, and he lived with her just fine and his father got to know her just fine despite being a Hufflepuff. So, Ernie assumed that he could get to know just about any Slytherin if they gave him the time.
Ernie laid out a jacket, be it a little smaller, for Astoria on her desk. “So, I’m here to get my stuff, but since it seems like you liked my jacket (even though you had your own special way of showing it), I did not get the same one because that would be extremely tacky of me, but I did get you one from the same brand,” he offered her a smile.
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importanceofbeingernie · 3 years ago
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@hvrrypvttr​
There were few people in this world that Ernie did not like. He did all in his power to see the good in people. In many ways, he would considered that at the top of his positive attributes and right below handsome, though it was a close second. Somewhere in there, he would put in generosity. Christmas was a time to get presents for his friends and he did his best to use his time with them all year to pick out the perfect gift that not only did they not ask for, but they did not realize how much they wanted until he gave it to them.
Walking around the aisles of the shop, he could hear some footsteps behind him. With a pressed on smile, showcasing the dimples on his cheeks, he turned to wish the person a Happy Christmas, but the smile soon fell into a curled grimace of disgust as his eyes locked on Potter. Of course. It would be Potter on a day like today. “Ew,” he muttered under his breath without the self-awareness to know how loud his voice carried.
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importanceofbeingernie · 3 years ago
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look who forgot to do this for ernie??? anyways here is my trashbag of a child. i will have his little rundown. he is difficult to pinpoint for a profile, so im going to learn about him as i write him
{ cismale , he/him , 22 , wolfgang novogratz } during the trial of voldemort’s last major conspirators, ernie macmillan was spotted. they work as a law student. rumor has it they are loyal + hardworking, but i’ve heard they’re proud + tone deaf. during the battle of hogwarts they fought for the order. when i think of them, i’m reminded of neatly pressed designer sweater vests, perfectly polished line of trophies and awards, a punchable smirk.
ernest macmillan was born to a wealthy family. his parents were a proud group in an arranged marriage. they were two steps away from being death eaters, despite never getting the mark.
almost a good choice not to do that since they were swiftly defeated and became social pariahs. seeing the death and destruction, and how even children were not safe from the dark lord, they raised ernie outside of that mindset.
he is still spoiled to all hell and back and they act as if the sun shines out of their son’s asshole.
if he gets it in him that he doesnt like you, no matter what he won’t like you. but if he gets it in his head that he likes you, he wont leave you alone sorry.
he is student for law and doing his best to become a great lawyer. no he wont stop talking about how hes the youngest in his class.
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