ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

Characters & Ships

Characters

Arlecchino (Genshin)

Alcina Dimitrescu (Resident Evil)

Aglaea (HSR)

Argus (R1999)

Feixiao (HSR)

Jane Doe (ZZZ)

Kafka (HSR)

Lynette (Genshin) (Platonically only)

Mizuki (Genshin) (Platonically only)

Ruan Mei (HSR)

Sevika (Arcane)

Xianyun (Genshin)

Ships

Acherswan (HSR)

Arlebina (Genshin)

Arlenora (Genshin)

Arlevi (Genshin)

Astralyn (ZZZ)

Beiguang (Genshin)

Caitvi (Arcane)

Calla x Lapis (The Dark Lords confession)

Candehya (Genshin)

Candehyarzad (???) (Genshin)

Clarissa Dovey × Lenora Lesso (TSFGAE)

Clorivia (Genshin)

Dehyarzad (Genshin)

Eimiko (Genshin)

Feikong (HSR)

Feikongsha (???) (HSR)

Feisha (HSR)

Gyohua (The Apothecary diaries)

Hertamei (HSR)

Hiccstrid (HTTYD)

Jeanlisa (Genshin)

Kokosara (Genshin)

Lennabel (Nevermore)

Lynguan x Fujin (Genshin)

Mizulumi (Genshin)

Rappabin (HSR)

Tennant x Eternity (R1999)

Toothfairy x Madam Z (R1999)

Topajade (HSR)

Verneider (R1999)

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

See I have to keep remembering to upload shit

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

It's always you

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

saying “i want him” about the character but not in a romantic or sexual way . i just Require him i need to Obtain him

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

YOU!! YES, YOU!! GO WRITE THAT FANFIC YOU THINK NOBODY BUT YOU WILL READ!!

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

i was listening to finesse — bryson (originally made by drake) the first part would loosely go alright with eve n jane. eve’s the yearning dork in love in her part while it’s you in jane’s. anyways,

her reaction to “ i want my baby to have your eyes. “

cw: fem! reader. wuh luh wuh luh

a quizzical look falls on the rat thiren’s face. her elbow sinks into the plush mattress while her chin is perched on her open palm. the thin covets slowly falls off her shoulders and slides down to the naked curve of her waist, exposing more of her perfect body. bits of the morning sun’s rays slips through the closed blinds of your bedroom, expertly highlighting the beauty of her graceful features that you’re lucky to see every weekend. a blissful dream is what you call of jane. once she touch you, everything that troubles you is forgotten and left behind like the clothes scattered about on the carpet floor. cyan eyes softens a bit when she finds that love-stricken look on your face.

she smiles at you playfully, “ my eyes, huh? you mind telling me why? “

“ they look its prettiest in light, especially in the moon and sunlight. “

although her expression seemingly doesn’t change, her pupils dilates.

she gazes down at you without saying a word for a moment.

“ then. . “ jane reaches down with her other hand, lazily traces your features with her thumb—specifically your nose and the outline of your face.

it wouldn’t hurt to indulge in this conversation, to tap into feelings she forces to not acknowledge when she’s not with you.

the ends of her tail gradually traces the vein along your wrist. “ your nose and face shape. i want my baby to have them. they’re one of the things that i love about you.”

“ y-you want them to have m-my eyes? “ she repeats back to you in a puzzled and bashful tone. the side of her bed is mostly empty due to her naked form nestled up against yours. thanks to your limbs tangled with hers under the thick covers, she’s unable to escape. it’s not like she truly wants to even if she could anyways. the warmth and tender pressure of your body grounds her back into a reality she never thought that she could have. changing her empty, meaningless lifestyle for the better and getting shown to a path personally worth fighting for wasn’t something she would expect two years ago. her life then was so empty then. looking back at it now, she wonders how she lived through it everyday. she’d get a job, complete it, come back to an empty home, eat at an empty table in silence, and sleep in an empty, cold bed. rinse and repeat, day and night. then, here comes you and astra, throwing mixtures of warm colors into her colorless world.

“ yup. “ you’d answer, like it’s the most easiest thing in the world. your palm cradles her flushed cheek. like a plant responding to sunlight, she leans into it while looking at you with curiosity. her light purple eyes glimmer as they do.

“ i don’t understand. .may. .i ask why? “ there was multiple instances where she would get commented on her eyes about how dead they looked without a shine. although it’s been years ago and things changed, it still sticks to her like glue.

you brush away blonde strands to run a thumb over the mole under her eye. the ends of your lips curl into a warm smile and evelyn’s gaze widens in awe.

“ isn’t it obvious, ‘lyn? because your eyes are the prettiest. it’s like i see the galaxy in them. of course i’d want my, no, our baby to have your best features.”

her breath hitches.

evelyn’s hand comes in contact with your hand on her face and lean forward to slot her lips between yours in a soft, sensual kiss. after a brief moment, she pulls away just enough to feel your breath fan against her parted lips.

she produces a loving smile of her own.

“ then i want our baby to have all of your other features. it’s only fair for them to have your best as well. “

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

Arlecchino Marriage HCs

࣪𖤐.ᐟ note -> Literally one of my favorite characters in genshin.

࣪𖤐.ᐟ warnings -> none.

࣪𖤐.ᐟ content includes -> fluff, slight angst, soft! Arlecchino, protective, children, letters, kissing her hands, jealousy.

۫ ꣑ৎ While Arlecchino is a cold and intimidating woman, she’s very soft and caring towards her partner. It is quite obvious how much softer she is with you even when she doesn’t show it in public. Just by the way she looks at you it’s obvious how much she cares about you.

۫ ꣑ৎ She is surprisingly quite affectionate with you. While she isn't a fan of PDA, Arlecchino would always stay near you as much as possible when in public together, her arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you close to her. When in private she loves kissing you and even cuddling you.

۫ ꣑ৎ Arlecchino often has to go on missions for weeks—sometimes even months outside of Fontaine. She always makes sure to write you a letter at least once a week, asking about how the children are doing and how much she misses you, a gift often accompanying the letter.

۫ ꣑ৎ It took her a long time to fully open up about her past and everything that happened in her childhood, but when she does it means a lot. You are the only one who has the privilege of calling her by her real name—Peruere, but she prefers you to call her by that name when you two are alone.

۫ ꣑ৎ Arlecchino isn’t insecure about her hands, but sometimes she fears that you are disgusted by them. She understands why you would be. You immediately notice what’s going on when she touches you a lot less than before, ending up with you kissing her hands, mumbling how beautiful they are.

۫ ꣑ৎ She doesn’t get jealous quite easily. Arlecchino has full trust in you and your relationship. When she does get jealous it’s usually during a Fatui event where some pesky business partners try and flirt with you the moment she isn’t around. Just a glare from her makes them run away with fear.

۫ ꣑ৎ Arlecchino trusts you, but that doesn’t mean she trusts the world. Whether you notice it or not, she has her spies watching over you when she’s away. If anyone dares to harm you, they disappear before they even realize their mistake. You may never hear of it—but she does, and she makes sure it never happens again.

۫ ꣑ৎ She is an early riser, but Arlecchino always hesitates to leave your shared bed. In the quiet moments before dawn, she brushes stray strands of hair from your face, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. If you stir, she simply whispers for you to go back to sleep, kissing your temple.

۫ ꣑ৎ The children adore you, especially when you read to them at night. Arlecchino often stands in the doorway, arms crossed, watching with a rare, soft expression. Sometimes, when no one is looking, she’ll sit beside you, letting the children pile into her lap as she listens to your voice.

۫ ꣑ৎ Her hands are stained in blood, but to you she will never be a monster. No matter what she does, every time she returns home you welcome her back with open arms. Arlecchino would hold you for a long while, reminding herself that despite everything, she still has something worth coming back to.

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

Made a Kafka rentry! I'm like, trying this now, hope I'm doing well xD

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

Stellaron Hunter Kafka

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

🦋

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

aglaea the goldweaver

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

Her favourite shades of blue

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

what else am i thinking about? jane doe with a reader who can keep up with her teasing and her charm. two agents who work for pubsec and who meet on the mission where both of them are the 'baits' sent in and they don't realize until much later.

the way they both dance the game of schemes and knowing remarks. the way they both can exchange knowing smiles before settling down and enjoying a moment of calmness before their next work. they know someday they might have to act as enemies for the sake of their job, but they are fine with it because they have those moments when they enjoy the life as themselves behind closed doors where no one but them can be there.

just jane bumping the reader with her hip as reader prepares them breakfast and they bump back before enjoying a moment of peace before another signal on their phones gives them a notification that they may not see each other for a very long time, but it is always worth it... because they protect new eridu and because they will return back to each other. always.

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

Argus 🦚

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

need me some ruan mei x reader in my life

Your Glacier Love

Genre : Sad

Summary : Upon your arrival you find someone who catches your eye, what shall happen?

Notes : Ruan Mei x Reader, can be read as platonic, angst, somewhat fluff, Reader has ADHD, sad, not very proud of this but anyways, if it gets enough attention I'll maybe write a happy end route lol, made the header myself

Word count : 3,022

Take me to AO3

Your guide lifted his hand, pointing towards the pentagon. "And this is Madame Hertas office.", he explained "You better not go in there, unless called for. Or if the ship is burning down."

You swallow, clutching onto your little box, holding papers, documents and of course your research. "Ive heard she's an intimidating woman.", you confess.

A nervous chuckle leaves him. "Yeah...not everyone can handle our great madam Herta."

The door opened with a wiring sound and you were pulled aside.

"Carefull...", he mumbled, but you didn't listen to what he said next, you had found someone to admire. A young woman had stepped out, her silky chestnut brown hair was neatly put up. Then there were her eyes, so cold, you were afraid to lose yourself in them, that sligth frown on her face, the blush on her cheeks, probably from working. Oh, it made her so beautiful. But she was gone whithin a blink, only leaving a faint smell of cake behind her.

"Who's she?", you breathed, not knowing if he heard you, not caring, your eyes were trained on finding her and then they focused on her swishing hair.

He looked at you, the. at her. A grin spread on his face. "Madam Ruan Mei, number eigthy-one in the genius society. She's also somewhat new to the station."

You stepped forward, trying to sneak a peak as she walked down those stairs."What does she do?"

His hands were stuck in the pockets of his white coat. "Biology."

You grabed the railing, watching her converse with her colleagues.

"She wants to create an Eon."

Your heart nearly pounced out if your chest. "An Eon...that is a mad pursuit."

You crocked your head, trying to keep her in your eye as long as possible. "How extraordinary."

"One way to put it...", he mumbled. She cut a corner and was now completely separated from your view. You sighed, leaning your head on your arms. You had no chance, it was obvious and you didn't seem to remotely be at her skill level...you sighed, yet another hallway crush to which you'd never talk to.

"...she does need an assistant."

That made your head perk up. "She does?"

He chuckled. "Yeah. I overheard that she wouldn't have something against one as of current...and since you also study life forms, well, your research could somewhat match up."

Your self-restraint was really being tested rigth now. You stumbled a bit forward, towards him, instead of jumping up and down, you could do that in your room. "Really?"

He nodded. "Though, she does have high expectations and she's not easy to talk to for most people."

You could manage and even if she really was just a hallway crush, this could be a great learning opportunity!

"So what do I have to do?"

He smiled, taking you along. "Ok, so first..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You've listened to the murmering of elevators for some time now, maybe even to long. You gulped. You hadn't been told that the ship had a basement, or, a "Seclusion Zone", if you wanted to be specific. The Elevator shook, making you stumble. You nearly dropped the cake and your research.

"Aeons!", you swore, but your attention was soon diverted by the dark corridors in front of you. You gulped loudly and the sound echoed of off the metal walls. But, you have come this far. You straightened your back, had your chest pop out and pull your shoulders back. It was just a basement. You retraced the way in your mind. You had taken the first elevator, then the second and had then gone to the elevator at the back of the elevator, now you were going rigth. Easy as that. Her break should start soon, or 'Break' after your newly acquired friend, she didn't really take breaks, she only came up two times a day to get sweets and water. You looked at the watch on your wrist rigth when the automatic door opened and before you knew it your ass was flat on the ground, having bumped into the one you were lookomg for.

The only thing that was saved from the chaos would be the cake, which she had somehow managed to grab of your hands.

"I'm sorry Madam Ruan Mei.", you blushed, gathering your papers, wishing the earth would swallow you whole and for you to be never heard from again. Esspecially when she bend down to grab one the papers that were just out of reach. You watched her pupils move from left to rigth, slowly, as if she didn't want to miss one precious letter...you wanted her to look at you like that.

"Research on biomic lifeforms...how interesting.", her hand extended to you and you tried to not be to fast, to not snatch it away and hide it in your folder. You wished you were a paper in one of her folders.

"Uhm...", you got back on your feet. "Thank you, Miss."

"I assume you wish to become my assistant?" She took a bite from the blue cake.

You nodded. She hummed, more likely because of its taste. "Very well."

She turned on her heel, walking back into her laboratory with confident strides. You followed with no questions. She sat down, working on the tablet.

"So...am I your assistant?"

She looked up at you, nearly staring into your soul, you looked away out of discomfort. "I'm afraid that I prefer to work alone.", She scooped up a little bit of the icing to inspect it. Your breath hitched.

"Well, it's not only me helping you, it would also help me, working for a genius member is a great honor! I- uhm, I'd appreciate it. You are so far in the studying of lifeforms and your papers are amazing.", you felt the heat rise in your cheeks as you kept talking, you had planned a whole speech, but apparently that was useless now. She meanwhile flipped through your documents, the papers, your CV. She closed it with a sigh, licking the icing off.

"I do not like being disappointed.", she expressed. "I have great projects to work on and I expect nothing but secrecy and the will to learn. Honesty is important too."

"I am. I can keep secrets. And I wanna learn.", your heart was beating so quickly, you thougth it was about to run away.

She stood up, taking the cake with her. "So, there you have your answer."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You slam the stack of papers onto the table. "You think she's going easy on me?", you crack your back. "Thanks for coming down here, by the way."

Your friend flipped through the infinite amount of pages. "I think she wants to kill you..."

You shrug, sitting down. "I'm an idiot...", you mostly were supposed to analyze some of the data and prepare reports. There were also some manuscripts you were supposed to fact check. You dropped your head on them, a low thunk sounded from it and you whined. "I can't do this."

A familiar whiring sound reached your ears, your head lifted and back straightened when you heard the familiar click of high shoes. It was Ruan Mei herself.

"Hello there Madame, do you require me to do more work?"

She shakes her head. "No. I just wanted to tell you that I will not be in my laboratory for a few days due to the simulated universe.", she looked down at your stack. "I need those untill the end of the week."

You nod. It was Wednesday.

Her eyes looked at your coffee, a gentle smile on her face.

"Do get enough sleep.", she turned around. You sighed dreamily when the door closed back up.

"She smiled at me."

"When did she smile at you?!"

"She told me to get enough sleep.", you leaned on your hand as you swung your legs. Did she care? She probably just didn't want you to make any mistakes...still though. You turned the first Page. She did care, in her own way, even if your friend did not want to realize it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You slammed the papers down on the table.

"They're finished.", your eye was twitching, your hair was partially blocking your view, you must look mad. Reasonably so. You had worked through the day untill you were finished with the last few papers. Your body was feeling heavy, your bones were stone.

She looked over her shoulder. Nothing screamed exhausting about her, but you knew better. The creases on her clothes were telling and her hair was sligthly frizzy. She looked down, tossed her ponytail. She was in front of you within a few steps.

"Are you sure they are done properly, though?", she looked up at you through her eyelashes.

You pushed some of your hair out of your face. "Wh- what do you mean?"

She stepped closer. "You smell of coffee and...", she put her hand against your forehead. "you have a heigthend body temperature."

You wanted to make a stupid joke in order to cover your blush, but the fact that you saw black and toppled over the table didn't make it easy.

"That's what I thougth.", she sighed, leading you towards a bench. "You took your pills, that mixed with the coffee overloaded your body. Also the hyperfocus you probably had on your task...", she pulled a blanket over you as you groaned. "Now, you are experiencing the crash."

She mumbled the next few words.

"I should not have doubted your enthusiasm or capability..."

Her heels clicked against the floor as she made her way to your work. "I will need these now, you rest and tell me if you need something."

You blinked, sligthly confused, but taking up on the offer...it was good for you that she was no real fan of big ligths either, preferring the soft glow of the experimental containers or any of her electronicall devices.

You pulled your legs a bit closer, despite the effort. It was entertainment enough to watch her, you'd smile whenever there was an annoyed crease in her usually calm face.

"Did you have any other assistants before?"

She wetened her finger to flip a page. "They mostly left after about two months."

"Could they not handle your heat?"

She looked confused now. "What heat? They could just not keep up with my demands."

"But they are reasonable.", you pointed out, chuckling.

"Exactly.", her voice grew more quiet. Recognizing that she needed to work, you went silent. It was funny, the things that can happen in two months.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You leaned your head against the earth, the plants, something inside you said it was kinda nasty, but you did not listen, being to preoccupied with Ruan Meis hair, brushing through it. It reached down to her upper thigh. You cherished the view. Her eyes were concentrated as she looked at the little creation hidden within the grass, humming at her.

"I'm sure it will work next time.", you assured, though it seemed to be no comfort for her, she continued staring as if it was an insect. "Ruan?"

"I failed.", she said. "Was there something with the numbers? Can you bring the papers to me?"

"Ruan-"

"I need to see what went wrong."

You sighed, to then comply. You watched her flip through them, spread each one out ib front of her. You both went over them, correcting numbers, trying different ones. She put her hair up halfway, her sad feelings having been pushed aside by determination.

Soon enough, well, a month or so, you stood back in front of the machine, watching her pull the components together. The critter had died quickly after its creation, which had been predictable, but this one would be healthier, live longer. The initial exams would show so, though you did not know that yet. The sound of compression sounded, to then reveal an adorable cake creature, wording, then hoping down.

"It's not perfect, but, this one will live longer and...you did amazing.", she looked down on it, then let her gaze drift to you. It hoped towards a few other experiments.

Her mouth was drawn in a thin line, her eyebrows pulled down.

Two hours later she'd stand in front of you, telling you she had to leave.

"What- but- why?"

Her voice was colder than you've gotten used to, her whole demeanor reverted to back to your earlier days, when she tried getting rid of you, in her own unique way. Tough luck that you were persistent.

She did not answer.

"Did I do something wrong? Did something happen? Please tell me-"

"It is for the best.", she picked up her tablet. "I need to do some other research. In the meantime you can continue to work on your own projects..." she gathered her work, you followed.

"This is very sudden. And I have no other projects as of current, I am your assistant-" she pressed a paper into your chest without another word.

"You had ideas. Work on them."

"Ruan-"

She walked away from you, standing on top of the staircase. A small smile was painted on her lips, but you knew that it wasn't real. "And I hope you'll get to work on even more projects in the future. You will be good on your own."

You felt your heart skip a beat. "Are you...firing me?", saying it made you feel dizzy and you had to hold onto something.

"I am doing what is best for all parties involved."

Your ears were ringing and there was that feeling, deep in your stomach. When the door closed and the click-clack sound dissapeared you felt tears drip down your cheeks. You put your hand over your mouth, covering your sobs, praying that the critters wouldn't wake up. They were napping on on of the benches.

"What did I do wrong?", you asked, looking up, imaging the stars above. "What did I do wrong?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your gaze was set beyond the stars. Your left hand rested on a star map, it had something to do with your new project, stars, now, it did not sound biological, but truly, it was.

"Are you still sad, about what happend?"

You hadn't heard the footsteps, yet you didn't jump up at the sound of the voice. You looked at your friend for a bit, before gazing back out. "I'm just doing work." Your expression was pensive. He teased you about it, untill, well, you know. About how you started to copy her. But what could one expect after three years of working together?

He sighed. "It's been nearly four months, there are other positions out there-"

"Do you seriously think it's about that?!", you wheeled towards him. "All this time? Did you think that?"

He stood there, pity on his face. "No, of course not...but what do you think it was?"

Your shoulders dropped and you looked at him in disbelief.

He gestured somewhat of a confused circle with his hand, as if he was building up the courage. "I mean...did you...love her?"

And that tensed you rigth back up. You took a step back. "I don't know...maybe?", you thougth back to...everything, those sake filled nigths, her hand accidentally brushing yours, the creation of all those little critters. The critters. "I have to go." You mumbled, taking your card and tablet. "I'll be in my room."

You didn't see how he was shaking his head.

Sometimes you'd still check on them. Your hand drew over a little tail, peeking from its little shell. The being was mewling, thanking you for being there, but it was still sad about its other creators absence.

"I miss her too.", you said, patting it's sad head. "More than you'd know."

More of the little beings would gather around you, drowning you, weighing you down, your eyelids felt heavy too, have they settled in there? You chuckled googly at the thougth, before your vision grew black.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A grumble grew from your mouth as you listened to the insistent, yet slow, typing.

"Turn it off."

A chuckle. "I'm afraid such a thing isn't possible. I need to finish this."

You ripped your eyes open. "Ruan?"

Her hand found your head rigth away, she carefully went through your hair, you leaned into the familiar motion, having it lead your head back on to the table. "How are you here?"

She sighed, her hand slowed down. "My research had to be cut short. There were some technical difficulties. There also seems to be an issue with the planet in a whole, but that shall be taken care of rather quickly.", she took her hand back to the Keyboard, typing, and there was that pensive look on her face.

"What is on your mind?", you sat up, taking the old blanket with you.

She stared at the screen for a while, opening her mouth one or two times. You waited, your arms crossed on the table. Who thougth the Genius Member 81 would have trouble articulating her emotions?

"It seems that...I've grown accustomed to your presence.", she was a little blurry around the edges, but you didn't mind. "When I was looking through my papers, I saw your writing and...it bothered me. That you weren't there."

Your head was back on the table oh and how nervous she seemed, you could feel it, beyond those knitted eyebrows and cold eyes. "I missed you too. And...I think that I've grown quite fond of you."

She leaned her head on her hand. Her other one was tapping against the table. Then she grinned and your heart flourished. "It seems we've reached an agreement then." Everything turned into a ligth pink and the background blurred.

She turned back to her typing, you felt a hand in your hair, despite the fact that she was typing with it. But it did not matter, you still fell asleep.

You may cry big tears when you woke up, gathering the critters to take them with you, but this was now and she was here.

Your beautiful Ruan Mei.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In case you want to read more of my works

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

I think as a culture we have all forgotten that fandom is supposed to be fun.

It’s not that serious.

It was never supposed to be that serious.

Especially since most of the drama and hurt revolves around shipping.

All of the ships are fictional. Being canon doesn’t actually negate the fact that the ship isn’t real. 

No ship, or any aspect of a fictional universe, is important enough to treat another real life human being badly. 

It’s not that serious.

[ihavenoideawhatiamdoingjustgay2]

papa...