iceyshenanigans

[iceyshenanigans]

What is home? (Yandere One Piece Isekai Au)

This is a rewrite (kinda) of an older work that I wrote much, much longer ago. I kinda wanted to explore readers fear and longing to return home in this, so I hope you enjoy. Also sorry for taking so long.

Minor warning for a few "sexual innuendoes." Nothing explicit happens, but here are a few mentions.

Word count: 7179

AU Navigation

---

Everyday was a struggle with this crew. 

You hate saying that, because realistically the Strawhats are the only reason you’re still alive, but it was the harsh truth. If you were still on that tiny island back in that sea–you think it’s the East Blue, you barely remember much from before you were thrusted onto a ship, you’d probably be dead or in some sort of institution. 

Looking back on your time stuck on that small island you honestly wonder why others were so quick to accept you, perhaps it was the children who adored you, or the elderly villagers who took way too much pity on you. If you were any of them you wouldn’t have been so quick to welcome someone like you with open arms, someone spewing nonsense about other worlds and having to return home–god you were such a wreck. You cried for days when you first arrived, so confused and scared. You remembered reading online about how people's brains handle intense trauma, creating these almost dreamlike scenarios in order to cope with whatever's going on in reality. That’s what you assumed all this was at first–a dream–an illusion created in order to process whatever was going outside of your head–until things started to get too real. In a way, accepting that this wasn’t a dream was more difficult than finding yourself in it. Wrestling with knowing that, despite what you want to believe, this is your reality. 

And now–in your reality–you’re having to deal with them. 

The Strawhats aren’t that bad. As you learned more about pirates you quickly came to understand that there were much worse options than these weirdos. You could’ve been institutionalized, if this world even had stuff like that, or you could’ve been taken by Marines and put in prison, which almost always meant death in this world. Realistically, you probably would’ve just stayed on that island and shriveled away, never accepting the reality of your situation and waiting to wake up. 

Instead, you just have to deal with prying people off of you every morning like your some sorta person magnet. 

The someone next to you is Luffy, who has his impossibly long arms wrapped around your center and is keeping you trapped against his chest, whining every time you try, and fail, to shuffle out of his hold. He must’ve found his way into your room last night, his hold reminiscent of previous nights, ones filled with tears and nightmares. Ever so often, he’d tiptoe as best as he could towards your room, opening the door and laying himself as close as possible to you. Sometimes you’d wake up to the feeling of wet tears coating your shoulder, his face nearly melted into your back. You know it was a nightmare from the sniffles and the whisperings, things so quiet you could barely hear them, but they were there–you always heard them. You never knew exactly what to do, if you should try and comfort him or if that would only make things worse, so you let him be. You’d let him lay himself next to you, mold himself into your back, and sleep–finally. 

Other nights you wouldn’t wake up until much later, like today, when you start to feel so restricted that you swear you can feel the air leave your body. He must’ve come in when you were actually asleep, because you have no recollection of him showing up in your room. 

“Luffy–either let go or wake up.” Your back is flush against his chest, his arms only tightening around you as you speak. You can’t see his face, but you’re sure he’s pouting, his whines only getting louder. 

“No.” His voice comes out raspy as it rumbles on the skin. You feel hot, both from the sun peaking through your window and the man attached to you like it would kill him to leave you alone. You roll your eyes, huffing as you try, and fail horribly, to strong arm yourself away from the very sweaty Luffy. Eventually, you wiggle just enough to move and face him, his hair sticking to his face and his eyes still mostly closed. He doesn’t have a care in the world, his face is calm and tranquil, a small smile on his face as he looks right back at you, a stark contrast to your clear annoyance. 

“You’re gonna have to leave eventually–you can’t just lay here all day.” You stare right into his eyes. “Neither can I…” You mumble at the end. 

Luffy’s smile only gets larger, either oblivious too, or outright ignoring, your discomfort. “Nah–I’m good laying here all day~.” He sings songs as he squeezes you tighter, crushing you against his chest. 

“Dontcha at least wanna get breakfast?” Your voice is muffled by his chest, but at the mention of breakfast, he perks up, light he forgot about the existence of it while fast asleep. Almost comically, his stomach rumbles loudly, causing him to finally let you go and sit up, thank god. You revel in this moment of peace as he frowns at his stomach, internally questioning whether or not he should leave, eyeing you every few seconds from your spot on your bed. 

“Yeah–aren’t you coming with though?” He tilts his head at you, confused at your relaxed position. 

“I’m gonna come later–I promised Usopp I’d let him do my hair.” In a moment, it’s like Luffy deflated. 

“Usopp?? But you have’ta have breakfast–” 

“I will–this won’t take that long.” You say, sitting up and stretching, Luffy watching you from the corner of his eye, clearly disappointed. 

Shortly after you returned with the rest of the crew, Luffy started to actually wait for you before touching his plate. It really worried you at first. Maybe something happened while training with that Rayleigh guy–maybe he got so strong he lost all of his appetite. It was a silly thought, but you couldn’t help but fixate on it for weeks, even going as far as to question Sanji about it. 

“There’s not much to it, my dear, he just wants to make sure you’re eating.” Sanji attempts to soothe your worries. “Our captain worries about you a lot, you know. We all do really–but he’s very…unique.” He places don’t a plate in front of you, smiling. Even then, you felt like there was something deeper to his words. A part of you felt like you should be flattered, knowing that your captain is always thinking about you. Another, more rational part of you, knows that starving yourself shouldn’t count as flattery. “We all just want to know you’re doing your best.”

You smile at Luffy, for once your expressions being complete opposites. “Don’t wait up Luffy, it shouldn’t take that long at all.” The room is quiet for a while, before his pout gets deeper slightly, and he whines. 

“Alright…but if Usopp takes too long I’m dragging you to the kitchen myself.” He says before heading out. You sigh, very aware that this is most likely the most amount of alone time you’ll get before the rest of the day. 

—

Most of the crew considered Usopp a coward, but you found that he was somewhat bold when around you. 

Usopp always did your hair in your room, sitting in front of a long mirror Nami got you not too long ago. You had a feeling she expected it to be used for trying on outfits with her, but so far it’s rarely been used for that purpose, probably because you’re not the biggest fan of standing out, especially in this world. Instead, it’s mostly used for days when Usopp wants to style your hair in unique ways. Today the style is more lowkey, he’s mainly just brushing through any snags or nots. He’s always so gentle with his movements, making the whole ordeal so peaceful that you’re surprised you haven’t fallen back asleep yet. 

“Your hair is so pretty.” Usopp mutters from behind you. Through the mirror in front of you, you can see how focused he is. His hair is down, a rare sight, and his chest is bare, a much more common sight. It still flusters you, even after spending so much time together with him and the rest of the crew. It doesn’t help that he’s so absorbed in his task, taking extra care to not tug too hard, his consideration making you nervous as he steals a short glance at you in the mirror. 

“What are you thinking so hard about?” He mumbles to you, a small smile on his face. 

“Honestly not much–I’m still so sleepy.” Your sentence was nearly cut off by a yawn, your eyes watering as you attempt to stifle any large movements. Stretching out your arms in front of you, you hear Usopp giggle behind you. 

“Luffy keep you up?” Usopp’s voice was low, almost teasing, causing you to whip your head around, startled by the accusation. You feel your whole body heat up as you’re met with Usopp’s expectant gaze, almost like he was prodding you for more. 

“We did not do anything if that’s what you’re suggesting!” Your voice is almost comically high, obviously embarrassed. Usopp raises his hands up in faux innocence, a hair brush grasped in one. 

“I wasn’t suggesting anything.” He claims. “Though–it’s just a little suspicious when he sneaks into your room every night–” 

“It is NOT every night–”

“Nearly every night, then.” 

“Ugh–” You bury your face in your hands, shielding yourself from the embarrassment of this entire situation. “--it’s NOT like that–Luffy cuddles with everyone on this ship.” At this point. Usopp has returned to his soothing movements, brushing your hair once more, though they’ve slowed down significantly due to the lack of tangling. 

“But it’s different when it’s with you.” Usopp says simply, eyes focused on your hair. Surprisingly, you aren’t moved by his words unlike the previous accusation. When you fall asleep and wake up to Luffy right next to you, when you’re beckoned to sit with him on Sunny’s head, when you watch the clouds slowly turn into stars together, giggling like fools, you know that it’s different. You feel it in the way he holds you, the way his hands touch you so gently, like he’s trying to be gentle for you. You know it in the way he seeks you for comfort, whispering about nightmares you’d never understand, holding you to him like you disappear in an instant. And god–you know it in the way he looks at you, eyes lighting up when you focus on him, his chest heaving as he takes a breath before rushing towards you. It makes your heart flutter, it makes you feel oh, so, special–

And as you’re dragged back to reality by the feeling of Usopp petting your hair, you can’t help but notice his gaze. The way he’s taking you in, how his eyes are filled with something so noticeable but still incapable to name. His gaze is gentle, similar to Luffy, but for some reason, you don’t feel the giddy, fluttering feeling you feel with him. You feel sad, pained even, as you stare at him through the mirror. Despite your closeness, you feel so far from him. The hand that isn’t caressing your hair is on your waist, holding you tight. You feel his nails indent into your side, keeping you from moving, like he’s afraid that in any moment you’ll disappear. 

“--with you–” Usopp speaks up once more, breaking you out of your thoughts again. His voice is much more quiet, close even. He’s lost any sense of teasing that he’s had previously, all replaced with something cold, somber even as he looks at you. “--it’s always different with you.” Usopp sighs. He has barely moved, both of his hands now on your waist, pulling you close to him. For as bold as Usopp seems to be with you, there are moments like this when he seems much more like himself. Like the mask that he wears has slipped and you’re met with his rawest, truest self. 

“Sometimes, I wish it wasn’t, y’know?” You watch him through the mirror, he hasn’t stopped looking down at you. “If you weren’t so–you–I wouldn’t be feeling like this.” You don’t know what he means, but as you feel a pinching sensation and are reminded of Usopp’s nails, you feel a small pit form in your stomach. 

“I’m sorry, Usopp. If i–” 

“It’s not your fault, really!” He says quickly. “It’s just–” He pauses for a moment, collecting his thoughts, his grip becoming tighter. 

“Luffy shouldn’t hog you that much, y’know?” His face moves to look at yours, finally allowing you to breathe now that he’s seemingly much more relaxed. His hands, albeit slowly, moved away from you, palms resting behind him as he reclines slightly. 

You gape slightly “I mean yeah but–” 

“I mean, who does he think he is, keeping you all to himself, like that’s fair!” He huffs “He can’t keep using the “i’m the captain excuse”, it gets old eventually.” 

At this point, you’re completely confused, staring at the sharpshooter wide eyed and mouth agape. You shake your head as he keeps complaining, droning on about “sharing” and “abuse of power”, not like you were listening. In fact, you were trying to ignore him as you collected yourself, putting on more presentable clothing and making sure you’re ready to actually start your day. 

“Come on Usopp.” You pat him on the back, causing him to stop his chatter. “We should go before there’s no more breakfast.” 

He coughs slightly, embarrassed, before rushing to stand up and follow you. 

—

The kitchen is always chaotic, but breakfast is its own ordeal. Luffy hasn’t eaten in eight hours so he’s fiending for some form of sustenance. Sanji and Zoro are always the worst in the morning, they’re both tired and testy, so they both always set each other off. Nami isn’t the best morning person, especially when Luffy is yelling for more and more food. Robin is perfect, as always, along with Chopper, who actually seems excited to start the day. Jimbie and Franky usually forgo breakfast, usually working on something too important to leave for even a moment. Brook is surprisingly peaceful in the morning, despite how much chaos he can cause later in the day, while Usopp seemingly was born to egg Luffy on with any chaos he’s causing, making everyone more tired and annoyed. 

So, fair to say, breakfast was very hard to handle, and today was no different. 

The room smells amazing as you walk in, being greeted with Luffy extended over the table, trying to grab something on the other side of it, something you assumed was meat. You assume he’s so hungry he’s forgotten that he could literally stretch, his loud whines echoing in the room as the plate is pulled away from him by Sanji. Said cook yells something to the captain, causing him to shoot down, pouting. The plate is placed down on the island close to the stove before more food is piled on top of it, finally being placed in front of Nami, who’s sweet praises causes a swarm of stutters and giggles to pour out of the chef’s mouth. 

“(Y/n)!” Luffy spots you immediately, making childish grabby hands towards you, his mouth full of food. “Come, sit.” He all but demands, basically shooing Usopp away as he comes into the kitchen behind you. You’re only able to sigh at his behavior, taking a seat beside him. Only a few seconds later, a plate is placed down in front of you, Sanji smirking behind you, clearly amused at Luffy’s behavior. From your new perspective, you’re able to see Zoro sitting at the island, eyeing you and the cook as he nurses something you hoped wasn’t alcoholic. You weren’t able to focus on that for long, as Luffy shoves food into your mouth, nearly causing you to choke if it weren’t for Nami patting your back. 

“Luffy!? Don’t just shove food down their throat!” Nami leans over to look at said man, who looks partially embarrassed, but mostly just happy you’re here. “God–it’s like you’re trying to kill them.” 

For some reason, that annoys Luffy more than Nami just yelling at him. “What–No!” he huffs. “They just need’ta eat.” He says, already close to pushing another spoonful of food into your mouth, before it’s moved away by Nami once more. 

“They can eat on their own just fine.” She says straight faced, clearly done with Luffy’s behavior. 

“Let them eat their food, Luffy.” Zoro says, his voice almost surprising you, nearly forgetting he was there. Luffy pouts, but you can tell he’s not too bothered, mainly since he still has food on his own plate. 

You choose to say quiet, munching on rice and meat, warmth filling your entire body. A smile decorates your face involuntarily, every part of you relaxing as you eat the wonderful food in front of you. 

“Breakfast is really good Sanji.” Your words are slightly slurred from the food in your mouth, but you can’t seem to care. Your cheeks are slightly puffed, making the smile on your face look somewhat dorky, but nonetheless, as you look up, you’re met with a very bright red Sanji, who’s smile is equally as dorky. 

“Oh–Thank you, my dear.” He places a gloved hand over his heart. “Your compliments me the world to me.” Sanji swoons, nearly dropping the spoon he was holding as you smile at him. 

“Damn cook, flustered over one little compliment.” Zoro takes a quick swig, side eyeing the chef. In response, Sanji’s face falls, instantly becoming much more cold as he points the spoon at Zoro like he’s brandishing a weapon. 

“Don’t act all high and mighty moss-head.” He smirks, his uncovered eye staring daggers into the man sitting across from him. “You’re just as easy to butter up.” In a moment, the spoon is twirled back to its regular position, stirring the food in the pan. Zoro’s face is burning up slowly, starting with his ears, which are crimson red. It’s clear his flushed state is more out of anger, the fist holding his bottle tightening as he watches Sanji revel in the entire situation. 

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” He mumbles, his voice low. 

“Oh really.” Sanji doesn’t even look up from the stove. “So you weren’t fumbling the other day when they complimented your sword work.” 

Zoro’s good eye thins slightly, silently threatening Sanji to continue. He sees this threat and continues. 

“Or you didn’t blush when they thanked you the other day for helping them train.” 

“No, he was blushing.” Luffy speaks up, causing both you and Zoro to whip your heads around, looking shocked as Luffy swallows whatever was in his mouth. 

“Why were you watching us train?!” You both yell at Luffy, who only tilts his head in response. 

“I like watching you train.” Luffy says to you like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. You feel yourself heat up, both out of sheer confusion and embarrassment. A million questions run through your mind, most centering on why Luffy would want to watch you train, and the most realistic answer you can come up with is: He just wants to. 

You can almost feel Zoro seethe in his chair, his mouth a thin line and his eyes are locked in on Luffy, who is seemingly oblivious to everything going on. Sanji, however, seemingly revels in the entire situation, a small laugh coming out of him as he watches the situation unfold. “Ha–so even Luffy can see how hopeless you are.” Sanji looks impossibly calm in comparison to Zoro, who looks incredibly annoyed. “But you say I'm the one who’s obsessed.” 

Luffy laughs, and you bury your face in your hands, Nami rolling her eyes as Usopp just sighs. ‘You should’ve seen him–it’s like he couldn’t speak when they told him how strong he was!” Giggles were the only thing that filled the room, if you don’t count the groan that escaped your mouth, very much wishing to disappear from the world right now.

“Aww, Moss-head, flustered over a little compliment, were you?” The glass in Zoro’s hand shatters, causing you to gasp and nearly shoot up out of your seat if it weren’t for Nami quickly taking your own hand. Zoro seems ignorant to the blood dripping down his arm,, quicking standing up so that he’s eye to eye with the chef. 

“Don’t act like you’re any better, shitty cook.” Zoro says, gripping the island, blood surely coating the surface. “You’re the one nearly losing it over any slight praise coming from their mouth.” 

“At least I’m man enough to admit it.” Sanji moves closer to the swordsman, only the island separating them. 

“You’re pathetic.” Zoro dodges the accusation. 

“You’re in denial.” Sanji shoots back. 

“You’re both idiots.” Nami interrupts, causing the two to look her way, Zoro’s face remains mostly unchanged, despite an obvious blush on his face, while Sanji looks almost disappointed in himself, clearly hurt by Nami’s words. “Fighting over someone who’s too oblivious to realize what’s going on.” Now you’re hurt, staring slacked jawed as Usopp and Luffy just watch on knowingly. 

“I’m not oblivious?” You whisper to yourself, causing Usopp to look over at you. 

“You’re hopeless.” He sighs before going back to watch Nami push the two idiots away. You could only scoff. 

Eventually, breakfast ended, mainly because Zoro and Sanji couldn’t be in the same room together anymore. After the two were separated, the day went off somewhat normally, as normal as a day with the Strawhats is. After breakfast, Luffy and Usopp start a fishing competition, both reclining off the side of the Sunny together. Robin and Nami were sunbathing, Nami sipping on something that Sanji made and Robin reading a book you recommended to her. Zoro was somewhere training, and even though asked if you’d join him, you were too paranoid from earlier this morning to want to train. So instead, you’re staring off into the ocean, watching the waves and fish pass by near the helm of the ship. 

“Jimbie, do you ever miss your home?” You speak up after a few minutes. You always like sitting with him because he’s so quiet. He never poked or prodded or asked questions, he let you exist as yourself, and you appreciated him for that. 

Jimbie didn’t speak for a while, but he did move to stand near you, the ship rocking back and forth slightly as the waves crashed against them. The whole sea was calm, “sometimes” he said, and you could feel him looking down at you, though you didn’t return his gaze. “Are you feeling homesick?” 

“Kinda.” You mumbled, but you knew the fishman could hear you. In an instant, he sat down next to you, his legs crossed and his gaze on you incredibly peaceful. “Is that selfish?” You finally look up at him, finding his gaze already on you. 

“No, of course not.” Jimbie answers, but you don’t feel any better. You always feel this way when you’re alone. If you focus on one thing for too long you’re  reminded about how long you’ve been away from your home, how many years have passed. Was anyone looking for you, did your friends and family miss you, do people even think of you anymore? Have they sold the furniture in your apartment, is someone new sleeping in the place you used to consider home? Has your job fired you, are you still being billed for subscriptions, have your parents mourned their child. All the questions bubble inside of you, making you sick. “You aren’t selfish, (Y/n), you’re human.” You watch the fish swim by, down below the waves, oblivious to the world around them, to you. “It’s not selfish to miss your life.” 

You sigh. “But everyone here has done so much for me–y’know?” Your words are quick and rushed, words tumbling out of you uncontrollably. “And when I think of home I get so, so happy.” There’s a longing to your words as you imagine something so far away. “Sometimes I imagine waking up in my bed and, like, this all being just a silly dream.” You say quietly. “I go to work.  watch T.V., you don’t know what that is but it’s really freaking cool, and I don’t have to worry about pirates or marines or dying.” You sigh once more, this time louder, exasperated almost. “And then I realize where I am and I think “wow, (Y/n), you’re such a horrible person” and I just want to disappear because I know I don’t deserve any of this.” 

Your throat hurts from talking so much, and because you’ve been choking up this entire time. No tears have left you just yet, you don’t cry about missing home as much any more. Maybe it’s because you’re stronger than you were when you first found yourself here. Or maybe it’s because your home no longer feels like home anymore. And really, that’s the saddest thing of all. 

“When I was in Impel Down, I was locked up with Ace.” Jimbie finally speaks up as you finally give him room to speak. “He talked about you a lot, when he finally wanted to talk. He never mentioned you by name, but he talked about someone he wished he could’ve spent more time with, someone who he wanted to live for.” Jimbie's gaze is so kind, so focused on you, that you can’t look away as he speaks to you. “I often think about what might have happened if you weren’t there for Ace, and though I’m positive Luffy would’ve found his way, I think we're all very grateful you’re here.” Jimbie smiles, one that’s so contagious you can’t help but parrot him slightly. “At least, I am.” He adds on. “And if I can be a little selfish–I hope that you’re with us for as long as possible.” You get the feeling that there’s something deeper behind his words, but you don’t press further, instead choosing to lean on his arm, continuing to watch the waves together, much more relaxed than before.

“By the way.” He speaks once more. “What’s a T.V.?” 

You gasp, shooting up excited. “Oh so you know how some Den Den Mushis can display videos–or I guess projections, well they’re like that but instead of snails we use electrical signals to capture frames and sound so you can, like, watch the projections on big rectangles.” 

“Oh–” 

You couldn’t help but laugh. 

—

In the late afternoon, Robin, you, and now Nami all meet up for a book club together on the main deck. It was a tradition you started with just you and Robin originally, but Nami joined a few weeks ago, saying something about wanting to “spend more time” with you. 

Something you realized over the few months since you’ve started this book club was how different literature is in this world compared to yours. A lot of writing was about nautical adventures, of course, but even the ones based in pure fact were steeped in so much history you have no understanding of. Each word, each reference went completely over your head, making you feel like some sort of child. It wasn’t necessarily embarrassing, but it did make you feel so behind. Hell, you remember the first few months after you first arrived here, when you didn’t know who Gol D. Roger was. You would’ve thought you’d grown three heads with how people were reacting to your lack of common knowledge. 

So, when you met Robin, and when she became an official crewmate, you asked her if she could teach you some stuff, anything really. You wanted to learn as much as possible, and with how kind she is, Robin agreed instantly. 

It started off small, with basic things. The names of Marine generals and admirals, all of which Robin knew from heart. You were taught about how the government works, the history of the world around you, the names of Islands. Stuff that most basic people would know. Then you had to learn about Pirates, which was a lot. Remembering captains and their vice-captains, the names of pirates of the old generation, before Roder was even known as the King of the Pirates. Names of Supernovas and why the “worst generation” was so pivotal to the world currently. And that’s how the book club started, when you began to catch up with everything but still had so much to learn. You wanted to keep learning but it all was too much for you to keep up with, so Robin suggested reading some of her old books and talking about what you learned, letting her answer any questions you had. 

The book club was a great idea, because for once you felt like you were learning at your own speed. Yeah, a lot of it was confusing, but at least it was much more fun than memorizing island and pirate names. The books you read were interesting, fun even, not all of them, but most of them. Some of them were old history books Robin has had for a while, so they were a bore to get through, but it was fun to learn from Robin. 

“How has this book been, (Y/n)?” Robin asks, a small smile on her lips. 

The book you’ve been reading, it’s a history book about the four seas, written by a man who traveled to each of them and recorded their cultures and differences. Despite it being very robust, the language very academic, it was a fun read. It was fun to read through the book and actually recognize the names of islands and kingdoms. 

“I actually really like it, but hey–” You flip to a page, a drawn map of the East Blue detailed on the paper. “--I can’t find the island I woke up on, it’s not listed anywhere?” 

“Oo–Let me see.” Nami scoots closer to you, peering over your shoulder and looking at the map. She pouts as she looks at the map, scanning across the paper quickly. “--yeah i can’t find it. The island must be too small for it to be recorded on the map.” She hums, giggling a bit. “It was a pretty tiny island~” 

“Yeah…I guess so.” You never thought you’d find yourself sentimental over the tiny island you were on for only a few weeks, but regardless, you find yourself sad that you can’t even learn of its history. But in a strange way, the lack of proper recording makes you feel less tethered to this world. 

“If it makes you feel better, my home isn’t listed in any books either.” Robin says, and it doesn’t make you feel better, it makes you feel worse. You can tell it hurts Nami too, who chooses to wrap her arms around Robin and hug her, which Robin reciprocates with a smile. 

“How about you, Nami?” Robin asks as Nami reclines back into her seat, basking in the sunlight. “Are you enjoying the book?” 

Nami sighs, flipping through some of the pages leisurely. “I mean–the maps are interesting, but I have to admit, it’s pretty boring.” Her voice has no animosity to it, and you truly didn’t expect her to enjoy it that much. “Come on~There has to be some more interesting books to read.” Nami rested her face in the palm of her hands, resting her elbows on the table in front of you.

Robin only continues to smile at Nami “The book club is to help (Y/n) learn, Nami.” 

Nami only pouts harder “I know, but learning doesn’t have to be so boring.” Nami looks over at you, who hasn’t spoken up in a while. “You think it’s boring too, right (Y/n)?” 

You look between Robin and Nami, both of their looks intense and filled with something you can’t seem to recognize. What makes it worse is how it seems like the two are on some wavelength that you can’t reach, like they know something you don’t. “I mean–I thought some parts were interesting–” 

“Some parts.” Nami repeats, raising a brow at you. “Like what?” She smirks. 

“Like–um–there’s a part where he talks about the Goa Kingdom–that’s where Luffy is from, right—”

“Uh huh, and what exactly did he mention, like, specifics.” She’s clearly enjoying your embarrassment, giggling as you try to remember. It’s so hard when she’s looking at you like she wants to eat you. It doesn’t help that Robin is just sitting there, smiling, her eyes thin and pointed in your direction. 

“--Like political stuff–” 

“Wow, political stuff, that sounds sooo interesting~” She teases, only giggling more when you start to get defensive. 

“It is, I'm just not good at remembering this stuff.” Nami shifts her posture so that her cheek is resting in one hand and the other is taking your hand. Her thumb is rubbing over your knuckles in an attempt to be comforting, though the look on her face only serves to make you more nervous. 

“Don’t worry, we believe you sweetheart.” Her voice is low as she looks over at Robin. “Don’t we, Robin.” 

“Of course–I’m happy you enjoyed the book, (Y/n).” 

Your hand slowly retreats back to your side, leaving Nami’s all on its lonesome. “I really did, Robin.” You say almost apologetically, like you’re trying to make sure Robin believes you. She just smiles, but the smile doesn’t look or feel comforting. It feels knowing, like she’s peering into your soul and finding something you’ve been trying to hide forever. Sometimes you feel like Robin can read your mind, like she knows more about you than you yourself. It feels so overwhelming, being under her gaze, but it’s also captivating, addicting. And worst of all, she knows. 

“I wouldn’t mind reading something else though.” You say, trying to ignore the stares and touches that burn your skin. “If you have any recommendations.” 

Nami gets excited, shooting up as she takes both of your hands, causing you to look directly at her in surprise. “We should read a romance book! I have so many good ones, and none of them are even that long–” 

“I haven’t read many romance novels.” Robin contemplates too herself, mumbling under her breath. 

“What am I supposed to learn from a romance novel?” You ask nervously. They both just laugh. 

“Well for one, you’re so  oblivious, everything goes over your head.” Nami smirks. “And who knows, maybe you’ll have a secret pirate love affair.” She hums, making your brow furrow. 

“I don’t know what you expect from me but a “love affair” is not it.” You nearly laugh, looking at the two women like they’re insane. 

Nami rolls her eyes, looking away in disbelief. “Sure.” 

You scoff. “What does that mean?” Nami just looks at you knowingly, like you’re the stupid one here. 

“You’re telling me you were traveling with Ace for two years and nothing ever happened.” 

“NO?!” You nearly scream.

You hear Robin giggle, covering her mouth with her hand slightly. “Aww and here I was thinking that you and Ace were soulmates.” She gives an unconvincing frown, you can tell by her eyes that she’s enjoying this. “Sad, I guess you’re still up for the taking.” She teases. 

You sink down into your seat, watching the two women watch you. “You guys are the worst.” 

Nami reaches over towards you, wrapping her arms around your shoulders and pushing your face towards her. Her words mushes into your skin, you can feel the heat from her breath on your cheek. “Aww, (Y/n)--you don’t hate us~You love us, don’t you?” She’s extremely close, her eyes right in front of yours. 

“O-of course.” You say. Nami giggles, happy. She hugs you even closer, kissing your cheek, and out of the corner of your eye, you can see Robin, smiling. For some reason, you can’t look away. 

—

The night sky was always so much clearer in this world than yours. The lack of light pollution is a big factor, but you like to think it’s because this world is so much more vast and understanding. You tend to romanticize this world a lot. Not because it’s something to romanticize, it has its fair share of horrors, you do so because it makes everything easier. Maybe it’s ignorant or naive to pretend like this world is more than it is in reality, but it helps. It helps with the homesickness and loneliness. You know, in time, you’ll become desensitized to everything and see this world as it truly is, but for now, you bask in the stars above you. 

“(Y/n)!” You turn your head to see Chopper bounding up to you, all smiles. “Suppers ready, c’mon!’ 

“Sorry Chopper, I'm not super hungry, I think I'm gonna skip dinner.” You say with a small smile “Thank you though.” 

Chopper’s smile drops immediately, replaced with a look of worry. “But–you have to eat.” He frowns, hurting your heart. 

“It’s really no big deal, I’m just not hungry.” You try to ease his worries, patting him on the head. “Do you want to watch the stars with me?” You ask, motioning for him to sit next to you. 

The blanket you’re sitting on is sprawled on the main deck, allowing you to lay up and look at the stars. Chopper looks back towards the kitchen, sound emanating towards the room, and then back towards you, before finally deciding to nod, plopping himself right next to you. As you lay back down, Chopper snuggles into your side, watching the stars. 

“Did you like to watch the stars like this back before?” Chopper asks, his big eyes looking at you. Something you always noticed about Chopper is how he dances around the reality of your situation. He never calls you home, home. It’s always “back then” or “before”, like a part of your life you can’t get back. You know you shouldn’t blame him, but everytime he talks like that it makes you grit your teeth. 

You shake your head slightly, “Not really–you can’t really see the stars back at my home.” 

“You can’t see them?” 

“No, it’s too dark, too foggy.” You try to remember what the night sky looked like back home. You can’t. 

“Foggy?” 

“Yeah.” Your words are almost breathless, like you can’t believe what you’re saying. They come out of you like second nature, because you can’t picture much. What did your home look like? Did the kitchen have an electric or gas stove? Were the walls painted white or green–or maybe blue? What did your friends look like, if you could remember would that even be true now that so many years have passed? 

“(Y/n)? Are you okay, your heart is beating really fast?!” Chopper looks up at you, worried, sounding like he’s about to cry. “Why are you crying?!’ 

Why are you crying? You think. You can’t remember. You assume, and for some reason that makes you cry more. 

“Sorry–sorry.” You rub your eyes with the palm of your hand, your voice horse. You wipe your cheeks as your nose sniffles. “Yeah–um–my home, it’s so polluted that you–heh–can’t see anything in the sky sometimes.” You laugh halfway through your words, tears still streaming down your face as you speak. Chopper looks at you worried and cautious, afraid of saying or doing something that would make you worse. You pat his head, which helps somewhat, but the frown doesn’t leave his face. 

“Do you miss it?” Chopper asks quietly. “Yeah–sometimes.” You correct yourself quickly, almost unknowingly. “Sometimes.” You repeat, final. 

“Well, I’m happy you’re here with us.” Chopper is all smiles, looking up at you. Tears stain your cheeks, but you find yourself putting on a smile regardless. It feels like when you wear shoes that are too tight, or a coat that makes you too hot. Uncomfortable, but you push past it. 

“Me too.” You stare at the stars above, trying to imagine them in a world you don’t remember. 

—

You always found it funny how you call transponder snails “phones” in your head. It made more sense to you, and, if you were being honest, lessened how creeped out you were by the look of them. You hated how they stared at you, how they could change appearance, and especially how they talked along with the caller. 

And as you stared at the transponder snail in your room, you wondered if what you were doing was stupid. As your hands shook, you wondered if you were scared, or just a fool. And as you hold the speaker up to your mouth, making sure you’re actually doing this all right, you wonder if he’ll even answer–

“(Y/n)...(Y/n) are you alright?” 

“Ace?” You sniffled, almost whispering as you waited for him to say something. 

“(Y/n)? What’s wrong? Why are you crying” You heard him ask. 

“I’m fine.” You were not fine. Your voice was clipped, you were choking back sobs, hunched over on the floor. “I–I just wanted to um–call–” 

“(Y/n)” Ace’s voice was calm, stirn, making you pause. “Why are you crying?” 

You frown, chest heaving as you try not to let out another sob. “I–I don’t–” You pause, almost coughing, snot coming from your nose. You can barely see from the tears in your eyes, and your mind is rushing wild with so much that your head hurts. But somehow, despite all of this, you still pause, and correct yourself. 

“I just miss you–and–I wanted to talk to you.” You say and clearly as you can. Ace doesn’t respond for a while, for so long that you think he’s hung up on you, but before you can prod for a response, he speaks. 

“I miss you too, (Y/n).” You hear him whisper. “But that’s nothing to cry about.” His words are comforting, reaching into your soul and calming you, at least as calm as you can be in this state. You don’t know what to say, whether you should thank him or tell him the truth. That you're scared and confused and that you want to go home. But again, you hold it back, and you smile, hoping that the stupid, creepy looking snail smiles back, because you don’t want Ace to worry, even though you know he will. In a strange way, that makes you feel better, knowing that he worries about you. That no matter where you are in the world, this world or the next, he’ll always be thinking about you. 

“I’m sorry for calling so late–I just wanted to tell you that I missed you.” You slam the speaker down on the phone–snail–thing, wrapping your arms around you as you wrack with sobs, covering your ears as you hear the phone ring, and ring, and ring—

You want to go home. 

Maybe you’ll dream of it, whatever it is, when you fall asleep tonight.

---

A/n: Please let me know what you think, either in the comments or an ask.

[iceyshenanigans]

Giant Gear 5 Luffy watching Zoro fight makes me think of reader fighting someone and Gear 5 Luffy just giggling and kicking his feet in the clouds, giggling as he begs reader to watch him fight like they aren't currently beating someone up themself. Giant Gear 5 Luffy picking reader up and poking at them while reader is trying not to fall.

Gear 5 Luffy my beloved~

[iceyshenanigans]

Thank you for writing!!!

Hehehe I'm glad you liked my silly drawings! :]

I was most excited to draw Ace and Luffy, thankfully I was able to get their emotions across properly.🙏(it was a lot of trial and error lol)

I felt really inspired by @rollinouttahere-writes ‘s post about what goes on with Lucky around Marineford! Sorry it’s ramble esc if you want to understand better just read the og post I reblogged before this one. :]

Bonus unused Shanks! I thought he looked too soft so I ditched it.

[iceyshenanigans]

I felt really inspired by @rollinouttahere-writes ‘s post about what goes on with Lucky around Marineford! Sorry it’s ramble esc if you want to understand better just read the og post I reblogged before this one. :]

Bonus unused Shanks! I thought he looked too soft so I ditched it.

[iceyshenanigans]

Omg I would love to hear lucky lore if you have the energy for it!!!! My depressed queen!!!! After watching saboady do you have any more things for that arc? Oh God I just know she's dying at Duval

I am kissing you platonically on the forehead for asking. Thank you for giving me an opening to talk about Lucky Break. But you have opened Pandora's Box by asking, so I'm also going to yap about Marineford and the timeskip because I've retconned what was previously established for both.

Under the cut because I don't know how to shut up

Her reaction to Duval's face reveal is identical to Brook's. She's wheezing from how hard she's laughing and giving extremely unconvincing apologies to Sanji between breaths. Once Duval's face gets rearranged and he starts aggressively hitting on Lucky, she just kinda roles her eyes at his antics and doesn't take it very seriously. Though she does accidentally spit out her drink into his face when he tries to wink at her.

When they first get to Sabaody, it's pretty chill. Nami drags her along to go shopping with her and Robin, so she misses out on initially seeing the Celestial Dragons and Camie getting kidnapped. It's once she gets to the auction house that it starts to get messy.

Kidd has been obsessing over her ever since he found her lost backpack, and it only got worse once she got a bounty poster and he now had concrete proof that the woman in the ID he found is alive and well. He spots her the second she runs into the auction house with Nami, but he doesn't confront her immediately. He wants to just observe for a moment. However, he does use his devil fruit powers to covertly wrap some scrap metal around her wrist. Lucky notices this, but she doesn't know who did it, and given how stressed out everyone is over Camie, she decides to keep it to herself for the time being.

They don't properly meet until after they all escaped the auction house and have gotten the vivre papers from Rayleigh. During the chaos that happens when the Pacifista attacks the Straw Hats, Lucky get yanked away by the metal on her wrist. It happens so quickly that no one even notices she's gone until Kuma is there, and everyone assumes that he must have gotten her when they weren't looking.

In reality, Lucky is being hauled away by Kidd, who is making a terrible first impression. He calls her by her real name, something that she thought only Luffy knew, and it shakes her up to put it mildly. She gets hauled back to the Punk Victoria by Kidd and his crew and is forced to try and explain how the technology in her backpack works to him all while being worried about the rest of the Straw Hats (and she doesn't even know about Kuma showing up and sending everyone away).

Kidd initially says that he'll let her leave after she explains her stuff to him, but he doesn't keep his word. He was already obsessed with her before, but finally being in her presence (and under the influence of her amulet) amplifies it to the nth degree. He doesn't just want her knowledge, he wants her. And being a pirate, he has no problem taking what he wants, so he goes back on his word to let her go and states that she's a member of his crew now whether she likes it or not.

While she's on the Victoria Punk is when she sees the paper announcing Ace's execution, and she starts losing her shit and demanding that Kidd lets her go so she can go help save him. Kidd is unmoved by her pleas, so she has to get creative. She tells Kidd that she actually has more pieces of technology from her world, but that it's on the Thousand Sunny. And she reasons that since Ace is Luffy's brother, that the ship will be at Marineford because of course Luffy is going to come to his brother's rescue. This sways Kidd enough to agree to go, but he tells her that he just wants the chance to take out some big shot marines to increase his bounty and to get her things off the ship. He totally doesn't want to do this to make her like him or anything like that.

So Lucky, Kidd, and Killer set out to go to Marineford. He doesn't want to risk the Punk Victoria by putting her in range of a bunch of navy ships, so he has the rest of the crew stay behind after they get as close as they reasonably can. After that, the trio sets out on a small motor boat lined with metal so Kidd can use his powers to bypass particularly rough waters and the gates.

Kidd is more than a little irritated when they get there and see that the Thousand Sunny is nowhere to be seen, but at that point it feels like it would be a waste to just leave without killing at least a few high ranking marines or pirates, so he agrees to let Lucky do what she needs to do, but he tells her that she's on her own. If she wants to save Ace, she's going to have to do it herself.

While Lucky is staring at the chaos of the all out war in front of her and wondering how the fuck she's supposed to do anything to help, "A" takes pity on her and decides to give her something. A single pair of sea stone cuffs appear in front of her with a note telling her to use it wisely. It initially doesn't feel very helpful given that there are at least 10 different people here that she could use these on, so she pockets them and runs into the thick of it, figuring that she'll just know when she really needs to use them.

When she does feel the need to use them is after Ace is already freed. She sees Akainu lunging towards Luffy to kill him, and she also sees Ace running in to take the hit for him. She breaks into a sprint, and thanks to Akainu having a severe case of tunnel vision, he doesn't notice her until one of the cuffs locks around his wrist, completely snuffing out his powers. She gets it on him less than a second before he could land the fatal blow to Ace.

Lucky is in such an intense euphoria from getting there in time that she completely forgets that she needs to run because she just royally pissed off Akainu, and while his powers are canceled out by the cuffs, he's still more than capable of killing her given that only one cuff is on him and he can still move freely.

Akainu grabs her by the throat and has her lifted off the ground, ready to snap her neck. Before Ace of Luffy can even react, a massive heap of metal hits Akainu, forcing him to drop her and lose his footing. While he's disoriented and stumbling, Killer runs up and decapitates him from behind.

A hush falls over the battlefield. No one anticipated that an Admiral would die here, and especially not at the hands of a bunch of newbie pirates. Lucky is slack-jawed as she realizes that she is going to be credited with having a hand in killing a fucking Admiral. Kidd, now more than content with this kill, grabs her and says that they're leaving now. Ace and Luffy try to save her, but Marco swoops down to snatch both of them up before they can have anymore near death experiences.

Akainu's devil fruit will replace Ace's at the coliseum in Dressrosa now.

Lucky will now be spending a bulk of the timeskip on Kidd's crew, and with their now skyrocketed bounties, they spend a lot of that time fighting marines and pirates wanting to kill/challenge the people who killed an Admiral. Between that and training with Killer, Lucky becomes a much more formidable fighter over the timeskip.

When Kidd challenges Shanks and then loses violently, Shanks is all like "Hey, I remember you!" and brings Lucky with him when they leave. They briefly ran into each other at Marineford, and between Lucky being a part of Luffy's crew and saving Ace, he's more than happy to let her stay on the Red Force until the two years are up.

This seems like a good thing at first since Shanks is openly willing to let her go, meanwhile Kidd made it clear that he had zero intentions of letting her leave. But, it doesn't take long for her to notice that Shanks is getting a little too fond of her. And when he starts floating the idea that maybe she doesn't really need to go back to the Straw Hats, she knows that she just jumped out of the frying pan and into the fire.

The rest of the timeskip involves her being the subject of a game of tug-of-war between Kidd and Shanks as they keep stealing her away from the other, and the only reason that she is able to get away from both and back to Sabaody is because "A" appears and offers to take her there herself. All she asks for in exchange is for Lucky to close her eyes for a second. As soon as she does, "A" snatches back the amulet, extracts the wish from it, and implants it into Lucky to amplify the effects of it. Lucky is then teleported to the Thousand Sunny without any memory of the exchange with "A".

Okay I'm done now. Thank you for letting me get that out of my system.

[iceyshenanigans]

You mentioned in a previous post how one of Law's biggest fantasies is to hold/have Readers heart, and I was wondering if you would be able to make a small drabble or story of where that kind of happens? Maybe set during the alliance to take down Doflamingo, Reader is curious about Laws devil fruit abilities and asks him all kinds of questions. Reader, having a morbid curiosity, asks if they could see their heart with his ability and Law is mentally freaking out and gnawing on the bars of his enclosure while outwardly he is just side-eyeing us really hard. It could be a mixture of softness due to Law interpreting Readers actions as a sign of trust, literally holding their heart in his hands, which may or may not help his growing obsession..

Law knows he should feel gross, disgusted at his thoughts. He knows that any normal person would refuse you, scoff at your mere question, but he knows that he's no normal person. 

Law holds your heart in his large hands, watching it beat with such attentiveness that it burns the image of the organ into his brain. You watch as well, in awe at the depth of Law's abilities--gaping like a fish as you restrict the urge to poke and prod at your own heart. 

A disgusting part of Law wants to believe you're just as secretly strange deep down as him, that you're fascinated by the functions and behaviors of the human body. A part of Law wants to believe that's why he's so taken with the image of your heart in his hands, that he is just so innately curious he can't help but accept when you ask to see your own organ. It's a much easier idea to believe than what is currently stewing in his mind. 

Despite the clear, almost gel-like film of the organ, Law can feel the beats, the blood rushing on his fingertips. With it, he can imagine your lungs expanding and deflating, your blood rushing through your veins. He swallows hard, feeling so impossibly close to you at this moment. He knows that, in an instant, he could close his fingers, restrict your breathing, and pause your blood flow. But as he feels you push up against his side in order to see the organ better, he's a wave of calm wash over him. 

His breathing, or lack thereof, becomes more normal as he realizes what this is. It's trust, the ultimate sign of trust. Looking at your face, he could tell you feel no fear, just fascination, never even recognizing the danger you've put yourself in. In a strange way, it is peaceful, knowing you don't fear him, even though you realistically should. 

Law wonders if he deserves this feeling, if he deserves the peace and calm. He wonders if he should've refused you, pushed you away and kept you at an arm's length. It would make what he's feeling a lot easier to understand. He wouldn't feel his own heart beating so quickly in his chest, he wouldn't feel his stomach twist at how close you were to him, he wouldn't want to burn his moment into his brain forever.

"--you good Law?" He hears your voice, breaking him out of his own thoughts. You're looking at him already, and he can feel his face heat up. In a moment, he's pushing the heart back into your hands, causing you to stumble slightly as you catch the organ. Law stands, coughing slightly, looking over at you for a split second before walking away. 

Frowning, you push the organ back into your chest--feeling little difference, before rushing back towards Law, who seemingly refuses to look back at you.

[iceyshenanigans]

That Stupid Kid (Yandere One Piece x Isekai Reader)

Based on this post right here, I wanted to expand upon the idea and write something about it. This is apart of my Isekai One Piece AU. This takes place right after the two year time skip, during the reunion on Sabaody.

Warning: A kid mentions his mother and father in reference to Ace and Reader. This is not meant to be commentary on readers Gender. In my AU, reader is Gender Neutral, and are depicted as such throughout the fic. I just couldn't find a better way to word this.

This is also very Ace focused, so if there are other characters you want to see, please let me know.

AU Masterlist

---

It's a hot day, unbearably so, the hood over your head doing little at keeping away the heat. You could feel the sun beam down onto you, making you uncomfortably aware of the sweat traveling all over your body. Sweat does little to offer reprieve as you feel the arm around your shoulder tighten. Taking a quick look at the man on your right, you sigh, groaning at the sight. He must be hot too, because his hood is draped lazily on his back, the cloak open as he uses his free hand to fan himself. The freckles on his face are easier to see in the harsh lighting of the sun, along with the pout on his lips, making you feel even warmer. 

You’re both supposed to be keeping a low profile, even making him promise to not cause any trouble before you both left for Sabaody. The cloaks were a precautionary measure to make sure people didn’t recognize you, both your bounties were too high to risk being spotted, even if it was hot out. So to see him so blatantly–uncaring, you didn’t know if it was guts, stupidity, or simply this damn heat. 

After these two years, reuniting with Luffy was proving to be harder than anticipated, the heat proving to be just the tip of the iceberg. The moment you stepped down on the archipelago, you were dragged to store after store by Ace, watching with creased brows as he ate and bought everything in sight. You tried your hardest to enjoy your last day with Ace, but the whispers all around you were taking up most of your attention. Everyone was talking about the Strawhats, children, adults, Marines, no matter where you turned the voices followed you everywhere. It made it difficult to pay attention, despite how hard Ace tried, attempting to lure you in with food and trinkets he found around the island. Maybe you would be more interested if you weren’t so nervous. Even after two years, you doubt your own strength. So much of this world was still a mystery to you, no amount of training or acclimating could get rid of that. You wondered if they’d even be excited to see you, if they even wanted to see you, or if they changed their mind in the past two years. It was silly, but you hoped they were just as excited to see you. Spending the last two years with Ace was–fun, to say the least, but you wished to see your crew. 

The people must be just as excited as you, because many were crowded around the small walkways in between buildings, intrigued by the presence of Marines. In contrast, you just grew more nervous, especially as Ace kept getting lost on the way to the ship. 

"Do you know where you're going Ace?" You whisper while maneuvering around the thick crowd of people in front of you. Carefully peering over a few peoples shoulders, you attempt to figure out what's holding people up, only to grow impatient as the crowd just gets thicker. You click your tongue while looking at the man at your side, who is way calmer than you are now. Ace doesn't answer you immediately, holding you tighter against him as someone pushes against your opposite side. 

"I'm pretty sure we went the right way--" Ace speaks in a low voice, his head moving from side to side in an attempt to find an exit. Grumbling, your attention is swayed by the sound of yelling, causing people to push closer to the noise. From the sound of it, there must be a fight going on, peaking your interest. Standing as tall as possible, you try to get a clearer view, only to be blocked by more people. 

"Ace, hey--what's going on? Can you see?” Ace shakes his head, letting out a low laugh at your excitement, though neither last long as you shoved up against a body yet again. Unable to move, you watch as Ace huffs, his playful attitude being replaced with frustration. He uses the arm around your shoulder to push you free, while using his other hand to shove more people out of the way, freeing you both from the crowd. 

You’re able to take a breath as you rest in an alley, feeling marginally cool now that you aren’t back to back with walls of people, though you still feel gross from the sweat sticking to your back. 

“I thought you said you knew where you were going?” Your words are filled with slight annoyance as you watch people rush down the walkways in droves, following and pushing past each other to get closer to the fighting. 

Ace only yawns as he takes a seat on the ground, much more relaxed than he was a few seconds ago. He places his hands behind his head while he closes his eyes “I didn’t think a fight was going to break out in the main part of town.” He states, causing you to cross your arms. The laugh that leaves him only makes you more frustrated. “Take a seat, we just have to wait for it to clear up.” He smirks as he peers at you through one eye as he pats the spot next to him “unless you wanna join the fight, i’m not against it.” 

You feel embarrassment fill your chest as you’re led to remember your small bout of excitement at the sound of battle. “What–No, I just–” Somehow you feel hotter than before. 

Ace’s eyes are now fully open as he watches you fumble, amusement written all over his face. “No need to be embarrassed, you got a lot stronger over the years, it only makes sense you wanna show off.” 

“I do not wanna show off!” 

“Aww, really? But I like it when you do.” He playfully pouts, pushing you over the edge. 

“Shut up!” You yell “let’s just find a way around the crowd. I don’t want to be the last one there.” Ace doesn’t say anything after that, making you calm slightly, though you still don’t enjoy feeling his eyes on you. Ace always has enjoyed making fun of you, pushing your buttons and seeing how far you’ll go until you break. You’re usually not as receptive, though today he seems especially desperate to see you go insane. Maybe it’s because he’s excited to see his brother, making him more of a pain than usual? Regardless, at this rate neither of you were going to see Luffy. 

“Are you two married?” You nearly choked at the worlds, judging by Ace’s surprised expression he wasn’t much better. Turning your head towards the noise, you’re met with the sight of a little boy, probably around the age of nine or ten. He’s half hidden behind a wall slightly further down the alley, his brown eyes wide and full of curiosity, though you’d call it mischief. The boy only continued to stare at you as you gaped, confused and devoid of answer 

“NO” you cough, shocked by your own quick response “no–we’re not.” You answer much more calmly, though all sense of calm left your body as you heard Ace let out a hard laugh, holding his stomach as he doubled over himself, unable to contain the joy he got out of the situation. You, in fact, were the exact opposite, your mouth a thin line as you resist the urge to pull your hair out.

“My mommy argues like that with my Daddy.” The boy says like that clears everything up. Tears are coming out of Ace’s eyes now, his laughs definitely causing some odd looks. 

“Okay?--You should go find your parent’s kid.” You step closer to him and shoo him away with your hands. As you get closer to him, the kid's eyes grow even wider, pushing himself away from the wall and closer to you in little kid excitement. 

“Woah! Are you a Strawhat?” You feel your heart drop, Ace’s laughter stops as he takes a confused look at the kid from his spot on the ground. “Does that mean you’re Ace–woah!” His eyes sparkle as he moves closer towards the man. 

“Um–well” You don’t know how to respond, avoiding eye contact with the little boy. 

“I sure am kid.” Ace smiles as he sits back up, recovered from his laughing spree, causing you to groan at the man. 

“Ace! You can’t just tell him that!” Ace smiles at the kid as he pats him on the head, both of them  reveling in the attention. 

“But he’s so excited to see us.” Clearly he’s more excited to see him, but you hold your tongue. “And what’s he gonna do? He’s like five.” 

“I’m ten.” 

“He’s like ten.” 

You take a deep sigh as you rub your eyes, noticing a headache coming on. Finally giving up, you take a seat next to Ace, close to the kid who is rambling onto him about something, he’s talking too fast for you to really tell what it’s about. Ace seems accustomed to it though, listening intently as he nods along with the kid, offering commentary ever so often that makes you smile. Moments like this really reminded you how much Ace liked being a brother, he must really be excited to see Luffy. 

You’re broken out of your trance as you feel Ace take your hand, holding it up for the boy to see. “See them, they’re the one who saved me, so better thank them a lot, m’kay?” The kid nods his head, quickly wrapping his small arms around your body. You’re only shocked for a moment, before you feel Ace wrap his arm around your shoulder again, smiling against the side of your head. Awkwardly patting the boy on the head, you internally thank everyone you can think of as soon as the kid runs away with a little wave, leaving you and Ace behind. 

The sun feels hot on your body once more as you turn your head to look over at the walkways, the once thick crowd of people, gone. For a moment, it was silent, you and Ace relaxing in the comfort of each other. 

“Are you excited to see Luffy?” You whisper, trying not to disturb the peace. 

“Yeah–but I'm gonna miss you, y’know.” He whispers back. “It won't be the same without you.” 

You let out a small laugh “I’m sure you’ll manage.” 

Ace doesn’t respond, so you don’t continue speaking. At least until you find that it’s time to continue walking. You stand up, feeling Ace’s arm fall back to his body. You take one long stretch before turning to face Ace, who’s staring up at you with a small smile. You outstretch your hand, smiling back at him. “Come on Ace, let's get going.” His smile grows and he takes your hand, interlocking your fingers with his. 

“Yeah, let’s go find that stupid brother of mine.” 

---

“Welp–that wasn’t hard.” 

Luffy was currently fighting with a Pacifista, oblivious to the people, world, and situation around him. If you were even close to his strength you would punch him right in the face, but he seems to be holding his own fine, Ace’s confidence in his brother making you feel a little better. 

“Should we help him?” You ask Ace, who shrugs in response.

“Nah, he’s fine.” He smiles at you “He’s almost done anyway, we should probably find the ship.” 

Nodding, you take one more look at Luffy. He was clearly enjoying the fight, and you could tell by the confidence that he exuded that it was no struggle for him. He stretched around from building to building, narrowing avoiding lasers and bullets. Part of you wants to help, but you knew he could handle his own, he was your captain after all. 

You smile, covering your face with your hood, walking away from the battle excited to see your captain once he was done being a dork. 

“Ace, do you think that kids are going to tell anyone about seeing us?” 

He laughs “Nah, he was a sweetheart though, wasn’t he?” 

---

Bonus: 

A scream reverberates through the Sunny, causing the crew to rush onto the deck. “W-what’s going on–(Y/n)? Are you okay?” 

Your hands shake as you hold the paper, wide eyes locked onto the title. 

Strawhat Charmer Tames Fire Fist Ace! First Exclusive Look After Two Years!

“That stupid kid!”

---

A/n: sorry for any spelling mistakes

[iceyshenanigans]

I know it’s another Ace-centric thing, but you mentioned how you wanted to write about Marineford and Ace being saved by isekai reader from his perspective. And I would absolutely love to read it if you do want to write it

I'll Live for You (Yandere Ace x Isekai Reader)

For reference, some things might not line up with actual Marineford, and I'm sorry about that. Hopefully it doesn’t ruin your enjoyment. I haven’t watched Marineford recently except for in One Piece Fan Letter (does that even count) so i probably forgot some stuff. 

Two Ace fics back to back that's crazy, I hope you enjoy.

AU Masterlist

---

Ace doesn’t believe in a god. He doesn’t believe there’s anything that good out there looking out for him. He doesn’t believe that someone would care enough to try and keep him safe. If there is a god, it sure doesn’t care about him, and it never has. 

Ace’s hands are kept locked behind his back, his knees hurt from how long he’s been forced into this wretched position, propped up for everyone to see like a fool in a play. His mouth is uncomfortably dry and his body feels weak in a way he hasn’t felt in years. Ace doesn’t believe in god, but maybe this is some devine punishment. The son of Gol D. Rodger must be punished for his sin of existence. It’s cruel isn’t it, from the moment he let out his first cries, Ace has been punished by the world, and maybe he deserves it. Ace has spent the better half of his life trying to find the meaning behind his existence, understand why he was put on this Earth if simply to suffer. And now, as he watches his friends, his family, his brother fight for his life, he can’t bring himself to understand if he’s truly worth it all. 

Ace doesn’t believe in a god, but he believes this is his punishment. It’s not his birth, it’s not his childhood, it’s not even his unavoidable death, it’s watching the ones he loves the most throw away their lives in hopes of saving him. 

It kills him, listening to their screams, their cries, but the sound of their determination kills him the most. It rips into his chest and carves into his heart, destroying him in the most real sense possible. He doesn’t want this, he doesn’t want people to fight for him, he doesn’t want to be saved. 

He wants them to live. 

Live in spite of him. 

Ace forces himself to lower his head, pushing his forehead flush into the boards of the stand as he hears his baby brother's cries. Luffy shouldn’t be here, he doesn’t want him to be here, but he’s locked, unmoving as he’s forced to accept the fact that his brother is putting his life on the line for him. Ace doesn’t know what to do except push his head impossibly deeper into the boards, pain radiating throughout his head as he grits his teeth and cries. The pain of the wood digging into his head fills itself into every other part of his body, but he doesn’t seem to care, or he lacks the ability to anymore. 

The old man left to keep his brother at bay a while ago, but it felt like hours, alone up on the podium. In that time, Ace has found himself thinking of the things he wishes he did. He wishes he spoke to Dadan more, wishes he told Luffy he loves him more, wishes he got to experience more of you. Before all this, Ace thought it was strange to think about his brother's crewmate so much, but he doesn’t seem to care anymore. He wishes to feel the warmth of your hands in his again, like back in Alabasta. You held his hand for mere seconds, but it felt magical, following you like a lost puppy as he was dragged around the ship. He wished to know more about you, what are your dreams, your aspirations, your desires. Maybe he’s just cocky, but he’d find a way to give them all to you and more, as long as it was never leaving him.

When he first heard of your predicament, being stuck here from another world, he didn’t believe you, but your curiosity and naivety to everything around you spoke volumes to your situation. You confided in him about it one night, talking about how you missed your family. At that moment, Ace felt like he understood you the most, quiet and revealing. He was flushed right next to you, not that you seemed to care much, the only lighting being that of the moon and the stars, lighting your eyes in a way that he could only call ethereal. You talked, and talked, and talked, and for once, Ace was quiet, listening to every word like a gospel. You seemed to care about the people in your life very much, wondering how they were doing and if they even missed you. 

At those words, Ace took your hands, moving close to your face, staring into your eyes. His gaze was intense, causing you to move back slightly from him, still connected by your hands in his. 

“Don’t say that, of course they do!” He huffed “They’re your family.” It was the alcohol in him, but Ace felt unreasonably confident in everything he was saying. You mean a lot to his brother and his crew, you’re starting to mean a lot to him, you mean a lot to many people. So he never wants to hear that again. 

“I-I just mean, you mean–a lot of people care about you, you shouldn’t talk like that.” He explains, slightly embarrassed, glad that it was too dark to see the blush on his cheeks. 

“Do you care about me, Ace?” He didn’t know if that was a genuine question, or flirting, but regardless, he said yes in an instant. You meant more to him then you could possibly know. 

“A lot of people care about you too Ace.” You say, staring into the starry sky. “So we should both live for them, right?” 

Ace didn’t answer, he couldn’t bring himself to, but he desperately wanted you to live. Even in these moments, he was comforted by the thought of you exploring the world, living with his brother, creating a better world for other. Ace wanted you to be happy, he needed you to be. 

He needed you to live in spite of him. 

Ace doesn’t believe in god. If god existed, it would let him live alongside you. Your paths wouldn’t be so diverged, you could exist together. Both of you could live for the people you cared about, you could live for eachother. 

Ace doesn’t believe in God. 

But he does believe in you. 

“Ace! Don’t worry, I'm here to save you!” 

Ace shoots his head up, why are you here? His eyes, filled with tears, take in the sight of you. You’re in a Marine uniform, hair tucked up into the hat, dirt covering your face and body, why are you here? He feels your hands, cold and shaking from the ice covering the battlefield, why are you here? His hands are unchained, freeing him from his binds, causing him to fall forward as he sobs, why are you here? 

As he looks up at you once again as you look at his body quickly before taking his hands, he sees blood near your stomach, too much not to be from someone else. He slumps over, frowns digging into his cheeks as you sobs at the sight of you. 

“Why are you here!” 

You visibly recoil at the sound of his horse scream, looking to make sure no one heard before shushing him with a finger. 

“Shhh–they’re going to realize what’s going on soon if you’re too loud–”

“Why are you here!” He yells again, almost like a child throwing a tantrum. 

You look confused, wondering what he means, before sighing, taking his face into his hands. “I care for you Ace–you promised me that you’d live!” You yell much quieter than him, feeling his tears on your fingers as he coughs up sobs. He itches to wrap his hands around you, hug you, feel your warmth, but instead you take his hands, ripping him from his position and leaping with him off the platform. 

For a moment, while in the air, Ace comes to terms with the fact that if god did exist, it’s within that heart of yours. It’s you he wishes to worship, it’s you he wishes to live for, it’s you who he believes in. 

Ace realizes while in the thick of battle with his remnant of strength that he can’t sense you with his Haki. You’re right in front of him, but to his Haki, you’re nonexistent. That must be how you’ve snuck around for so long amongst the fighting and war. He wonders though how you managed to get hurt. Did you slip and fall on the ice, coming face to face with a pirate? Was it one of his brothers, did they recognize you from his stories, or did they pierce you through the stomach indiscriminately like any pirate would to a Marine? Did they revel in your screams, or did they realize their mistake and regret it later? Did they twist their sword as you cried out for help, or did you remain silent in hopes of maintaining your cover? 

Did you hide your pain in hopes of a better chance to save him? Did you think of him as you cupped the wound on your stomach? Did you curse him for putting you in this situation? 

He knew you wouldn’t, but he wished you would. 

Ace didn’t know how you both found yourselves here, slumped over behind a way, away from the fighting. It was a miracle only you could provide that no one noticed the two of you, but that wasn’t his concern. 

To his side, there was you, cupping your stomach in pain. The blood had spread taking over most of the white Marine issued shirt. Your hands, once warm and comforting, were covered in blood, shaking due to what had to be the cold and fear. Your breathing was shallow, quiet, and your eyes were distant–

“H–hey, stay with me, please–” Ace moves closer to you, taking your face in his hands. He looks at you intensely, patting you on the cheek in an attempt to focus or eyes. It didn’t work though, your head lulling almost like liquid as he moved you easily. You were losing too much blood, some was leaking from your nose and mouth. “Please–I don’t–please stay–” Ace stuttered, cries leaving him. 

In what seemed like cosmic irony, you shushed him, almost like he wasn’t breaking down in front of you. “They’ll hear you…go…to the ship” You said in broken words, interrupted by spirits of blood. Ace shook his head, waves of “no” leaving his mouth. 

“No, no, no, no.” Ace shook his head, he refused to let you die, and he refused to leave you alone. He moved closer to you, sitting right in front of you, straddling your waist. In another world, Ace would burn up, laughing off the intimate scene as he attempted to woo you. In this world, where the world is cold and the only sounds he can focus on are the screams of pirates and Marines and the huffs of your breaths, Ace feels something inside him burn, deep within him. Something within him screamed as he moved up your shirt slightly, just enough to see the dark red wound. His body nearly recoiled at the sight, thick and deep, bruises littering the skin around it. It made him sick with rage, igniting inside him at the thought of you dying, only to be quelled by the sight of your tears, you knew what he was going to do. 

In a second, his hand heats up, placing the entirety of his palm on the wound as the flames travel along your skin. You cry, scream for him to stop, squirm and take hold of his arm as he mumbles out apologies. He moves closer to, his forehead resting against yours, sweat, blood, and dirt mixing. “I’m sorry, it’s almost over–i’m sorry, please–” Ace keeps talking, he can’t listen to your pain, but he can’t let you die. 

He can’t let you die. So he’d sit here, burn your wound, and let you hate him for these few moments, even if it kills him. He screws his eyes shut, pushing his hand deeper, biting his tongue, drowning out his own sobs.

A few more seconds later, and it’s over, the flames die down, and you're left sniffling. Ace doesn’t move, slowly opening his eyes to look at you. He doesn’t want to look at your wound, so he feels it with the palm of his hand, hoping that it’s mostly burnt over. He’ll take you Marco, get you fixed, you’ll be better, you live. 

You’ll live for him. 

Ace eventually moves to sit flushed right next to you. Your cries and panting have died down, and you’ve moved your hand from his arm down to his hand, holding it tight. He can feel the crescent moon shaped scars on his forearm stinging, but he can’t bring himself to care. 

“Why did you come?” Ace whispers, not expecting you to answer. 

“You mean a lot to Luffy.” You whisper, blood drying around your mouth, “you mean a lot to me–i couldn’t just let you die.” 

“So you thought killing yourself was better.” He didn’t mean for it to sound mean, in fact it was the opposite. Though that didn’t mean he understood your thought process. 

“Would you do the same for me?” 

“Yes” He said in an instant, looking over at you, only to find yourself smiling at him. Tears were in your eyes, blood was staining your teeth, but you still smiled. 

“So we should both live, right?” 

Ace, frowned as tears flooded his eyes, but before he could do anything, you passed out into his arms. 

He felt you slump into him as his breath quicked, gripping you tightly. He didn’t know what to do, he didn’t want this. From a distance, he could hear the yells of pirates, of Marines, of his brother. They’ve probably noticed his absence, but he didn’t seem to care, too focused on your unmoving body. All he could do is sob into you as he looked around, begging for something. Where’s Marco, he needed him, he didn’t know what he was doing, but he didn’t want this. 

Ace sat there, unmoving, scared, wanting to rip out his heart and give it to you if it meant you’d live. But he’s stuck, and it terrifies him. 

You’re going to die, and it’s his fault. 

Ace feels someone looking at him from above, holding you closer to him, he looks up at the person through tear filled eyes. The man, dark and ominous, Trafalgar Law. Ace knew of him, but he didn’t know what he wanted. His gaze looked almost ambivalent, focused on you as he spoke. 

“I’m a doctor, give them to me.” Is all he says, and Ace doesn’t know to trust him, but as he looks at you, feels your shallow breaths, and thinks about the severity of your wounds, he doesn’t have a choice. 

Ace maneuvers you to face the man, brows furrowing as he addresses the man with a snarl “save them–please.” 

—

Ace is awoken to the sound of crying. 

His eyes open up slowly, the first thing he does is look for you, making him realize that he doesn’t know where he is. It’s quiet, and cold, but the medical med he is feels like the most comfortable thing in the world. The sound of crying only becomes more recognizable as Ace wakes up more, rubbing his eyes as he yawns. The cries were loud, filled with emotion, and raw. 

They were Luffy’s. 

Ace wakes up immediately at the realization, looking around, only to see both him and you on the other side of the room. 

“You idiot! Get off them.” He watches as Law tries to push Luffy off of you, but to no avail. Luffy’s legs are wrapped around your torso, his arms around your neck, and his head in your shoulder. Despite that, he can hear his brother clearly. 

“I-I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have left you, thank you so much–” His brother sniffs, much to the disgust of Law. “Please don’t die, please don’t die, please don’t–” 

“You idiot!” Law hits Luffy on the head, still trying to push him away from you. “They’re going to die if you don’t get away from them.” Luffy still doesn’t move, in fact he gets closer to you, making Ace laugh. 

Ace doesn’t mind that none of you have realized that he’s awake yet, he’s just happy to see you and his brother, happy and alive. When Ace was forced onto the podium, he never thought he’d live another day, but because of you, he’s here. He’ll see his brothers another day, he’ll see Luffy another day, he’ll see you another day. 

“Ace! You’re awake!” At the words, Luffy gasps, moving his attention onto Ace. Finally, you’re free, though Ace can’t focus on you as he feels Luffy hold him so close. For once, everything felt good, felt perfect even. He pat Luffy on the head, feeling him laugh against his chest, and he looks over at you. 

He watches as Law moves your shirt up slowly, his movements methodical and soft. Your torso is bandaged, blood still seeping through. Law moves his tattooed fingers across the bandages, assuring that you’re okay after Luffy jumped onto you. You say something quietly that Law smiles at, and Ace feels his chest tightened at the sight.

Ace watches as Law moves your shirt back down, smoothing it slowly as his hand stays near your waist. It doesn’t need to stay there, he can move it back to his own dumb body, but his fingers hold onto you, and Ace wishes to rip them off of his body. But you seem comfortable, blissfully unaware of the man so close to you, his hand on your waist, his eyes locked onto yours. 

And for some reason, that hurts the most. 

But for now, Ace doesn’t find himself caring, because you're here, he’s here, and that’s all that matters. 

Ace takes a breath. 

He’ll live

He’ll live for you

And you will be his, he’d rather die than have it any other way.

---

A/n: Sorry for any spelling errors

[iceyshenanigans]

late merry Christmas lol

[iceyshenanigans]

I’ve been thinking about this idea forever XP

[iceyshenanigans]

Very silly

[iceyshenanigans]

We'll Never Know the Place

title is from a Fever the Ghost song that felt appropriate for this piece

Chrollo x Cute Hunter!reader

Warnings: death, torture, gore, body horror, mentions of captivity, implied kidnapping

Word Count: 7.9k

“You don't need me for this.”

Chrollo paused in his step, taking a moment to glance over his shoulder as he looked back at you. Feitan halted as well, having been making his way out of the room, and you felt the way he watched you, his expression no doubt turning to one of concern and displeasure at the fact that you were already kicking up a fuss.

Despite having both of these particular men staring at you, you didn't meet the gaze of either; your attention was on focused solely on the unknown male in the chair that sat in the center of the room.

He was slumped forward, his short, dirty blonde hair covering his face somewhat while the blood that had dripped down from his neck stained the bare skin of his torso. It had gone on to soak into the material of his pants before it ultimately created a puddle on the seat of the chair beneath him and dripped off the edge as it continued to pool below. He was only able to lean forward to a certain extent as his wrists were firmly secured to the arms of the chair by way of two pieces of thick rope that kept him firmly attached and thoroughly unable to get away from whatever he had been put through. Which had undoubtedly been a lot, based on what you had heard before and from what you could see now. There were several fingers missing on both of his hands, you noted, as well as something that was off with the skin of his left bicep that appeared to be blackened. A glance at his legs revealed that one of them had been broken severely as it was bruised and bent beyond belief.

There was more damage – there was always more damage with the things Feitan did to people – and while you didn't want to know what it was, the things you could smell clued you in to what he had done to this man. A distinct burning smell, combined with an odor so foul that it made you want to vomit.

The man was dead. Obviously, as you wouldn't have been brought in otherwise.

You had known this was coming, too. After hours of hearing him scream and cry and beg for the pain to cease, you knew what would be happening once Feitan stepped into the main room where the troupe was gathered and whispered something into Chrollo's ear. That had been followed by a quick nod of acknowledgment by Chrollo before he ordered the torturer to end the man's life. You knew that, not long after, the head of the troupe would stand and tell you to follow.

You knew what he expected from you, and there was absolutely no part of you that wanted to go through with it.

“You don't need me for this,” you repeated.

Chrollo stared at you over the fine white fur that lined his coat, his gaze unyielding and his presence as oppressive as ever.

Then he spoke your name, his tone stern.

“I would have thought by now that you knew how useless of an effort it is to try and get out of this,” he continued.

“Insisting on using my ability is stupid,” you argued. You stepped backwards despite knowing Feitan was right behind you. He was watching you carefully as well, likely poised to grab you if you made any attempt to run.

You weren't going to do that. But you would argue with Chrollo.

“Shizuku is right outside,” you continued, “Blinky is better suited for this. It'll take literally a second if you have her do it. Just use her and leave me out of it.”

Chrollo observed you silently, his gray eyes watching as you tried to convince him that Shizuku was the better option for what he wanted. Your argument wasn't just a way of a bullshitting to get out of what you didn't want. You knew that you were right. More importantly, he knew you were right.

But those cold eyes remained impassive no matter what you said.

“I brought you here for a reason,” Chrollo told you, “now I need you to do your part.”

His tone was a tad more dangerous that time, and that was enough to put the fear into you as you tore your gaze away and looked to the side, your fists clenching hard enough that the way your nails were digging into your palms was starting to cause you pain.

“….. I don't want to,” you answered.

“That's a shame,” he said.

He then turned so he faced the body of the man as he said “but I'm afraid this is the last chance you'll get to do it of your own volition before I'm forced to make you do so.”

“……”

There was little other choice than to do it before it got to that point, you told yourself. Otherwise he would give that order, and a sharp pain would form in your skull, getting worse and causing you absolute agony until you did as he had told you. Nor would it end there, as your defiance going that far would mean trouble for you once the troupe's business had finished and you were left alone with Chrollo again. You hated the way he was able to control you, but there wasn't anything else you could do. It was a lose-lose situation.

With a frown on your face and your eyes cast downward, you steeled yourself before you began approaching the man's body, your clenched fists shaking ever so slightly as you made your legs walk you forward.

I hate this

You kept your gaze downwards as you walked by Chrollo, keeping your eyes only on what was directly in front of your feet, not wanting to make more eye contact with him than was necessary. A small bit of defiance that did little to affect him, you knew, but it was all you could do.

How childish, you could hear him say in that subtly mocking tone that you were all too familiar with.

I hate you

After a few moments, you heard Feitan's footsteps walking out of the room before growing quieter. He had stayed when you had spoken out, his warning gaze heavy upon you as you had felt him silently urge you to do as Chrollo had said. Now that you were getting down to business, he was gone, having returned to that main room to sit with the others.

He knew what Chrollo was making you do, as did the rest of them.

I hate every last one of you

They were aware of those feelings of yours as well, and for certain members, it bothered them deeply. They didn't like how upset you became with them, nor how emotional you would get when Chrollo put your abilities to work. But no matter how much it bothered those members, all of them were in support of their boss.

None of them would ever come to your aid. All because in their minds, you were the one who was in the wrong.

The burnt odor coming from the man was stronger when you moved closer to him. Once you were standing directly in front of him, you were able to confirm that the darkened mark on his bicep was, in fact, a burn mark. The sight had you biting your lip in disgust as you thought of the agony he had gone through at the unfortunately creative hands of Feitan and the wide variety of pain he had no doubt experienced before his throat was finally slit wide open.

Hopefully with everything else that had happened, that final slicing of flesh wouldn't have been as painful.

Hopefully.

A cursory glance about the room revealed the moderately sized wooden box that Feitan had been using as a table that was stuck in the corner, as his tools were lined up neatly on top of it. Almost all of them were covered in blood. When you narrowed your gaze, you saw bits of flesh that were still stuck to the metal.

Chrollo already knew what you were thinking.

“Take care of whatever is left over of him over there,” he began, “but you're to do nothing that alters Feitan's tools.”

…. Damn. It looked as though that stunt of yours from last time really was a one time only thing, much to your disappointment. But it wasn't that surprising.

If Chrollo was ever to make a mistake, he only made it once.

Turning your attention back to the man's body, you kept your focus on him while Chrollo stood behind you, watching your every move as you prepared to use your nen. Thoughts of what would work best in the environment and how much you needed to alter came to mind, but first….. First was to make him more presentable. To give him at least a little bit of dignity in death. Because at the end of the day, he was a person who had a life, goals and ambitions, all of which had been snuffed out for the sake of whatever it was the troupe was up to now.

Was it possible that he had been just as bad as Chrollo and the others? Or potentially even worse? Yes.

But you still wanted to show some kindness.

You began by undoing the ties around his wrists, and immediately you found that the rope had been wrapped so tightly that the skin in that area was raw and bleeding, some of it even scraped away against the harsh material that bound him. How much had he attempted to break those bindings while Feitan was removing his fingers?

It didn't matter, you told yourself, because you were undoing them now. Once both pieces of rope were untied and laying on the ground beside him, you placed his hands upon his lap which allowed you to hide the stumps of his fingers somewhat. Though that action caused him to lean too far forward and you were forced to adjust him before he fell over onto the floor. You quickly grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him so he would lean back, and that made his head roll backwards as it followed the pull of gravity.

Now not only did you have a good look at that awful gash in his throat, but also the lifelessness in his unblinking eyes and the way in which his slack jaw hung open.

…. You could fix this. While you couldn't do anything about his throat, you could fix the way his expression looked.

Placing both of your thumbs over his eyelids, you gently pulled them shut. Then, while you kept your thumbs pressed over his eyes, you exerted a tiny bit of your nen that spread over the lids. When you pulled your hands away, his eyes stayed closed. You did the same with his jaw, locking the joints in place so his mouth would no longer hang wide open. When that was done, you stepped away, and the nen you had infused into those places on his face stayed strong. With his face looking like that, it was as though he was sleeping.

Even though that illusion was quickly shattered with one glance towards his throat, that felt better to you.

The other person in the room was clearly of a different opinion.

“You're wasting effort, love. No one who cared for him will know what you did,” Chrollo told you.

You frowned.

“He was a person; he deserves respect, even if it's just this much,” you answered.

“He was a person who existed outside of the troupe,” Chrollo corrected, “therefore he isn't important.”

“Maybe not to you.”

Damn it. Your voice was already starting to crack.

Chrollo noticed that as well and wasted no time in pouncing on your vulnerability.

“You haven't even begun and you're ready to shed tears?” he asked.

“With the things you make me do, what do you expect?” you responded bitterly.

“I expected that you would have grown used to this.”

“Maybe if being involved in this awful shit was something that I actually wanted,” you said, “but I still don't, and I never will.”

He didn't respond that time. Instead, as you were looking at the body of the unknown man and trying to figure out if there was anything else you could do for him, you heard movement coming from behind you as Chrollo walked to the side of the room. What he was doing was obvious when you heard the sounds of chair legs scraping against the concrete floor before they were lifted into the air, and then again moments later, when they were placed a few feet from where you were standing and directly in front of the dead man. An aged chair creaked as Chrollo settled down upon it, and suddenly the full intensity of his gaze was upon you once more.

“Whenever you're ready, love.”

“….”

There was no more stalling to be had, then. Nothing more you could do to put this off. Chrollo probably felt as though he'd been generous in allowing you to take your time and do what he felt were pointless actions in rearranging the man's body. After all, the troupe was still in the middle of a job, and he wanted you to get on with it so they could continue with the current loose end being fully tied up.

If you took any longer he would invoke that pain on you again.

With a deep sigh, you activated your hatsu.

Revival Gardener

In moments, your nen had conjured up your watering can. Moderately sized and brightly colored, it stood out among the gray rock and rotting wood of the abandoned room. The can itself was a pastel yellow and adorned with pink accents, topped off by the two handles that were shaped to resemble cartoonishly cute hearts. It was very likely that if there was ever a magical girl character with abilities that were focused on gardening, your watering can would surely be in her inventory. The light purple packet of seeds that was also adorned with hearts fell into your palm after the watering can, and you figured that would likely also be something she would use, though you wondered how her abilities might differ from yours.

Maybe she would've been smart and would have some sort of ability that was more effective in combat.

As interesting as it might have been to consider the show about a hypothetical magical gardening girl, you couldn't focus on that forever. Definitely not with Chrollo staring down your back. Placing the empty watering can on the floor next to you, you adjusted the packet in your hand, both sides of which were left blank, and reached into your pocket for a pen as you looked to the man again.

His body, his clothes, the chair, and the blood that had been dripped and spattered across the floor. Four things to make note of. Another glance over at Feitan's tools and the blood and gore that covered them, not to mention the blood trail that led from them and back to the body. You would need to make sure you covered all of that area as well.

With all that Revival Gardener was capable of, it sadly wouldn't be a difficult task.

Holding the pen to the packet, you began to write:

Male human body

Adult's clothing

You were about to write down shoes when you stopped to double check yourself. It turned out he wasn't wearing any shoes, so that wasn't something you needed to bother with. You continued with the list.

Wooden chair with rope

Human blood

….. That was it. After double and triple checking what was before you and what you had written down, that was all you needed to change. You flipped to the other side of the packet which had yet to be filled in, and you paused a moment as you decided what you would write.

During that time, you didn't hear anything from Chrollo. He stayed silent as you wrote on the packet, but you could tell that his gaze was still on you. You didn't need to turn your head to confirm that.

After a moment of pondering, you decided to write the word “lavender”. The area the building was in was appropriate for it, with dry temperatures and lots of sunlight. That would grow well here.

With the decision made, the pen went back into your pocket, and you ripped open the packet before dumping the entire thing into the watering can. The seeds, the packet and the words you had written all broke apart within the space of the can, transforming into liquid that began to swirl about within your conjured creation, emitting a soft purple glow as it filled the can to the brim.

When the water stilled was when you could begin, and now with the can in hand, you looked again to the dead man. Exhaling a shaky breath as you clenched the the handles tightly, you took a few more moments before lifting the can above him, and with a tilt of your hands, you proceeded to pour the contents upon the poor man's body. He was quickly soaked from the water while the blood was washed down all over him, pooling in that same place in the seat of the chair. The chair was soaked as well; you made sure of that as you walked around it to make sure you covered every inch.

The body, the clothes, the chair, the blood. All of the blood. You needed to take a few steps back as you covered the floor in the unending water, making sure that you got every last stray drop.

All of it needed to be changed.

The man still looked as though he was sleeping as the water ran down his face and caused his hair to stick to his forehead. The blood from his neck washed down fast, however, joining the growing puddle beneath him that now had the water mixed in.

You then walked over to where Feitan's tools sat and poured the water over them. Though the box and the tools were quickly soaked as well, those items would remain as they were once this was over.

The last thing to be done was to cover the floor where the blood had dropped between the tools and the chair, and just like everything else, the water soon engulfed it.

When you returned to the body to make sure you had gotten everything was when the conjured water finally ran out.

With that, the first part was done.

You took a step back, staying behind the body while your watering can vanished. The second half of the process was going to begin soon, and you needed to watch all of it.

Chrollo chose then to speak once more.

“Come sit with me, love.”

You looked over to him and frowned when you found him motioning to an empty chair that sat beside him. The temptation was there to refuse and insist that you would stand for the rest of it. But just like everything else, this wasn't something you could get out of no matter how much you protested.

You remained silent as you walked around the body and took your place by Chrollo's side, your eyes immediately going back to the man while you gripped at your knees while you desperately hoped that, just once, Chrollo would refrain from saying anything further. Even though you knew that was incredibly unlikely, both due to the fact that there was a fair amount of time that needed to be filled out before you could leave this room, and because there was no way Chrollo would overlook your continued resistance.

Still, you dared to hope that he might, just this once, keep quiet while you suffered.

But of course that didn't happen.

“You know that it doesn't need to be this way, love,” he began.

You frowned again.

“You're right; it doesn't,” you agreed, “and yet you're dead set on forcing things to be this awful.”

You then cut him off before he could speak, saying “don't bother telling me that I'm the one making things difficult. I'm sick of hearing it.”

Chrollo let out a hum in response. Hearing that only had your frown deepen while your hands clutched at your knees harder, all the while you kept your gaze focused on the body. There was no change to be seen as of yet. But that would take a little while, as it always started internally before spreading out beyond.

Right now the man still looked like he was sleeping.

“Have our discussions become so stale that you immediately know what I'm going to say?” he asked.

“They only ever go around in circles. Honestly, I would've thought you'd be sick of the same conversations over and over,” you said.

“Be sick of them? Never.”

Chrollo leaned forward on his knees as he gazed at you, and from your peripheral vision, you saw the serious look on his face as he told you “if it's a chance to help you, then I'll gladly have the same conversation tens of thousands of times.”

“You're not helping me.”

“I am, love. You just aren't able to see it yet.”

“Because kidnapping me and making me dispose of your victims is such a great way to help someone,” you sarcastically answered.

The man's body shifted somewhat as he slouched back in the seat, though even now he still appeared to be asleep.

“I'm putting your abilities to good use,” Chrollo countered, casting his gaze towards the body as well.

“They weren't meant for this.”

“And yet they work quite nicely.”

“Shizuku's ability is more effective.”

“So you've said.”

Chrollo leaned back in his seat as he continued “but Shizuku isn't the one that I'm worried about.”

You scoffed.

“You're trying to say that you're worried about me?”

“I am.”

You shook your head.

“That's a lie. You're not worried; you just want to control me,” you said.

“That's not true.”

“How is it not? You took me away from my work when I didn't want to go with you and you used one of your stolen abilities to make me do what you want. How is that anything other than you controlling me?”

“Because it's for your own good,” he answered.

“I think I know what's good for me.”

“And I say that you don't,” said Chrollo, “the others are in agreement with me.”

Because all of you are monsters

You couldn't say that part. Because even though you knew it to be true, there was no way you could bring yourself to voice such a thing. You had grown up with Chrollo and most of the others, after all. All of you living together and finding those little scraps of happiness within that city of junk and decay.

Even though you hated the people they had become and you made that feeling of them clear, there was still some affection you had for them, for the children they had once been and who were now nowhere to be found.

The man's body twitched, arms and legs moving in response to your nen.

Already there was bile building up at the back of your mouth. You hated how you now recognized that as being a sign that his nervous system was in the process of changing. Just how many times had you been made to do this now? You could count them if you really wanted to, but once again you kept yourself from doing so. The exact number didn't matter. The fact that you were being made to do this at all was awful enough.

Chrollo had paid no attention to the current condition of the body, his focus back on you as he asked “have we already reached the point where you ignore me? I thought we had a bit more banter to go through before that happened.”

Your scowl remained on your face as you replied “for someone who claims to be worried about me, you sure do take a lot of time to mock me.”

“I'm afraid that can only be blamed on you, love. I care about you deeply, but you make it difficult when you kick and scream at me in an attempt to test my patience.”

Hearing that made you bite your lip in frustration; he was making it sound like you were a child throwing a tantrum. That alone was enough to make you want to hit him. Not that it would do you any good, even if, in the moment, it might have been slightly satisfying.

But just like you had told yourself before, the repercussions of such an action would come fast and harsh once the troupe dispersed.

…. Maybe that was pathetic of you. That you, a Hunter, would allow something as simple as pain be enough to give him leverage over you. Weren't you supposed to be stronger? After passing the trials of your exam, how was that enough for him to control you?

Then again, you hadn't taken the exam in the hopes of proving your strength or even in the hopes of becoming stronger. Getting that license was simply the easiest way to achieve your goal.

The chair beneath the man groaned and the legs began to buckle, bending slightly forward while green began to appear in the blood soaked wood. The ropes that had been left on the floor were also being overtaken by the green color, and upon the surface of the floor that was marred by his blood, small sprouts were starting to appear.

With the way the front legs had bent forward, the man's body lurched over, his upper half leaning against one of the chair handles. Despite the change of position, his face was still largely facing towards you, and the sense of peace you had tried to grant him by shutting his eyes and mouth was still there somewhat, even with the awkward position his body was in.

You hated this. You hated that you needed to watch the body of this unknown man being slowly taken over. If you tore your eyes away for too long, the change would stop and you would be stuck in this place with Chrollo for that much longer, which he would definitely chide you for.

Though you doubted he would mind all that much.

“Who was he?” your voice whispered, your nails digging into your hands again as you were having a difficult time with the sight before you.

“No one of importance,” was his response.

“I want to know anyway.”

“You don't need to,” Chrollo said firmly before he added “if you wanted to know his name you should have made that a condition for your hatsu.”

“I didn't make it a condition because Revival Gardener wasn't meant for things like this” you replied.

“I know. Your reasons were far more pointless.”

That last part stung.

“It wasn't pointless. I was helping people,” you said.

He had the nerve to sigh deeply at that.

“Love,” he began, “you chose to become a Cute Hunter.”

“I was helping people,” you insisted.

“What were you helping with? The official role of a Cute Hunter is to maintain the beauty of people and keep them looking younger. Was helping others maintain their vanity so rewarding?” he asked, the disdain slowly but surely creeping into his voice the longer he spoke.

“You know what I was doing. You know wasn't anything like you're saying and you know how much it meant to me,” you said.

You turned your head so you could give him the full extent of your glare as you again insisted “I was helping people.”

“You were growing flowers out of trash,” Chrollo said, “such a thing is hardly life changing and I guarantee there were few who even noticed what you were doing. All of us agreed that it was a waste of your talents.”

“But it wasn't. It isn't.”

He was wrong. The troupe was wrong. It wasn't a waste. They were simply incapable of understanding because of the path they had chosen.

Chrollo shrugged at your response, saying “feel free to cling to those beliefs of yours while you still can.”

“You say that like you think-”

The words coming from your mouth were lost when the man's body moved again, this time in the way of a full body jerk as something inside him gave way to the life growing within him. Whether it was because of that movement or simply something you had done wrong when you had applied your nen earlier, you couldn't say.

But regardless, his eyelids and mouth snapped open, and with him still facing towards you even now, you were greeted with a horrific sight.

His eyes were gone.

All that stared out at you through the empty sockets were the green of the leaves and the soft purple petals of the lavender flowers that continued to grow and fill the space within the man's head. His tongue was gone as well, though his teeth still remained, sitting among the stems and leaves while his gums were being consumed, slowly but surely revealing the bone of his jaw that sat beneath.

Now with his mouth once again hanging slack and open, the flowers began to make their way out into the open, the plant life now poking out at the edges of his mouth. That seemed to have caused a chain reaction, for the plants began to make their way out of his injuries as well. The stems and buds were now hanging out of his neck wound, reaching down his bloody torso where they were met by the ones escaping through the cavities left by his missing fingers, all mingling together as the flower buds grew rapidly. Lavender was blooming in that burnt section of his arm and on his broken legs and spreading out just like the rest of the plant that had found its way to the open air.

Empty sockets continued to stare at you as the flowers continued to grow, reducing what once had been a man into nothing more than a human shaped terrarium.

All the moisture had left your mouth as you stared back. You were left unable to speak as you began to tremble within your seat.

Mercifully, Chrollo remained silent during this time.

When the change began to affect his bones, his neck was fast to break. His head quickly bent over to the side as his skull began to lose it's shape.

And upon seeing that, the horror of it all overwhelmed you.

With a hand over your mouth, the floodgates of your emotions opened wide and you began to loudly sob.

This wasn't the way things were supposed to be.

A woman in a sharp business suit and her long hair tied up in a bun looked about the trees that surrounded her in bewilderment, her mind clearly racing as she wondered how this forest had come from nowhere and if she had somehow gotten lost on the way to her intended destination.

“Are you alright?” you called out, causing her to jump as she turned to face you.

“Ah – yes! I just…..”

The woman looked about again as she said “I got mixed up somehow and ended up here. I must not have been paying attention when I was driving.”

“Where were you trying to go?” you asked.

“The abandoned strip mall,” she told you.

“The one that was built on a former garbage dump?” you clarified.

She nodded.

Your hand went to the back of your neck as you said “well, most of it's gone now, but I can take you to see what's left of it, if you want.”

The woman's eyebrows furrowed, but she followed anyway when you beckoned her. Through a moderately sized collection of trees, bushes and a few open glades filled with wildflowers, you led her to the other end of the newly formed forest, and the both of you were greeted with a mound of dirt, concrete and aged garbage, most of which had fossilized. It was large, standing high over both of your heads. That was more in line with what the woman had expected, but she again looked behind herself to see the lush greenery that was clearly present in a place that it shouldn't have been.

She looked to you as she began with “you said… You said that this was what was left of the hill?”

You nodded.

“The same one that used to be a dump that was covered over and had built the mall on top?” she asked again.

Again, you nodded.

The woman looked to the greenery and then to the remains of the old dump site before she looked at you again.

“How?” was her bewildered question.

You nervously clasped your hands together as you began to answer.

“I'd heard about it not long ago,” you told her, “that the structure was abandoned years ago because of the methane coming from the ground and the way it had been sinking, and that it was still sinking into the garbage underneath it. When I learned that nothing was being done about it, I thought I could help.”

Realizing that you hadn't actually answered her question, you added “I'm part of the Hunter Association, and I figured that my skills would be able to fix this place. So I changed the buildings and what was underneath it to this.”

You gestured to the forest as you explained “it took a long time, but I think it's turned out well.”

The woman didn't look any less shocked after you finished speaking.

“You can just….. Do that?” she asked.

You nodded.

The woman continued to stare at you in disbelief, and the longer she looked at you like that, the more you began to worry that she was upset.

Then she spoke again.

“Can I hug you?”

The request was unexpected, but you smiled as you nodded to her. The woman quickly pulled you into a hug, and she held you tightly.

“Thank you so much,” she said, “I've been trying for so long to get the city to do something about that place but they always put it off, saying there were more important things they needed to take care of. They were content to let that place rot and fall apart, and I didn't think anything would ever be done.”

“Thank you so much,” she said again, “you don't know how much it means that you've gotten rid of that junk hill.”

You smiled again as you hugged her back, and a warmth bloomed in your chest as you heard her words of thanks. What you wanted most was happening: this had been your most ambitious project in your role as a Hunter, and before you were even finished, it was making a difference.

If you could do that for this woman, then the thing you wanted most could surely happen:

You could change Meteor City.

Your sobs continued to wrack your body as you watched the man's skin fall limp, held up only by the lavender flowers inside of him. He had been reduced to a skin suit, an unnatural looking thing that few would guess had ever been a real, living and breathing human. The chair he sat on was now beginning to lose it's shape as well, and slowly, the suit of skin began to lower further and further onto the floor as the wood of the chair was also absorbed and transformed.

Once all of the bones had been completely taken over, the skin began to do the same. It started in the areas where the skin was already broken, spreading from there like a disease. You watched helplessly as the last of that unknown man was eaten up by your hatsu, as his skin was broken apart and changed from flesh into plant.

You couldn't help but cry as the thought repeated in your head: this wasn't the way things were supposed to be. Your hatsu was never meant to be used in such a way, never meant to be perverted like this. All you had wanted when you became a Cute Hunter was to help people by way of giving them small pieces of joy as you turned trash into something as simple and beautiful as a flower. Even if it was something small, it was worth it to you.

Why did Chrollo find that so objectionable?

The pieces of the man's skin that still remained reached lower to the floor as the chair gave away completely. His blood soaked pants were vanishing quickly, the rope that had once sat by his side was long since gone, and the trail of blood that had led up to the box with Feitan's tools had been replaced by a long and scattered line of flowers.

It wouldn't take long now until everything about the man – his actual body and the things done to him – would be gone completely. No one who hadn't been here would be able to guess as to what had actually happened.

All they would see was a large patch of lavender growing within the abandoned building.

Though the man was nearly gone now, it didn't make it any easier on you, as your tears still fell as you focused on the parts that were still there: the last remaining bits of his skin and his dirty blonde hair that still stuck out at the edge of the growing patch of flowers. It had spread out far enough that it had reached where the two of you sat, and when you felt the petals brushing against the edge of your shoe, you pulled up your feet.

As much as you wanted to console yourself by saying that there was some comfort in the man's body not being allowed to decompose or rot, you knew it would do little to ease your distress. You weren't a good enough liar to convince yourself of that.

Chrollo's feet had stayed where they were when the flowers had extended out towards him, drawing his gaze down to the floor. After a moment of consideration, he reached down to the space in front of him, finding a stem of lavender and grasping at it. Then without even the smallest ounce of force, he plucked it. Sitting back up, he examined your creation, twirling it as he did so and causing the flowers to spin in his fingers.

“The end result is beautiful, love, I will give you that,” he told you, “but ultimately your reasons for your ability are far more superfluous than I know you would ever want to admit.”

You had bitten your lip to keep your mouth shut, though it didn't stop the way you sniffled while you continued to cry as you watched the last of the man's strands of hair turning green and sprouting up flower buds.

“One day you'll see that it was a good thing that I stepped in.”

Again you didn't respond, but you stiffened when you felt him lean towards you and felt his fingers tucking a few stray strands of hair behind your ear. The apprehension of feeling his touch turned to disgust when he placed the flower he had pulled into your hair, tucking it in with the hair he had so gently moved only moments before.

Cruel.

That was all he was.

When the last strands of dirty blonde hair were gone and all that sat before you was the lavender, you knew it was finished. Just as Chrollo had wanted, you had done 'your part'. With no trace of the scene of bloody torture from before, you could now leave the room.

You attempted to do so without another word, but no sooner had you stood up, Chrollo ordered you to sit.

With no other choice, you did just that.

Chrollo's hand traveled to your lap in order to clasp yours, and the squeeze he gave you felt like it was meant to be encouraging, though you knew it was performative. Just like everything was with him.

“I know you think that I enjoy seeing you in distress, love,” he began, “but I need you to know that it couldn't be further from the truth. Your well-being is something that I care about deeply.”

“…. You have a funny way of showing that,” you mumbled, not having the strength to speak louder.

“Think of it as rehabilitation.”

“It's not, though,” you said, shaking your head, “I don't need to be fixed.”

“And once again, you're simply wrong, love.”

“…..”

When you pulled your hand away from his, he chose not to react. Nor did he say anything when you pulled the bit of lavender out of your hair and tossed it to the floor where it was quickly hidden among the rest.

“Can I go back to the other room already?” you asked bitterly.

Chrollo hummed as he took a moment before answering you, as if to rub more salt into your wounds by treating you like a child that needed to ask for his permission before you did anything.

You had pointed that out, once, calling him out on how degrading it was as well as insulting.

“Well, you aren't much different now than how you were as a child, are you?” he had spoken in response.

“Even now, you haven't grown past clinging to your princess dresses and playing make believe that you can force the world to match your idealized fantasy.”

You had slapped him for that. Hard enough that there was blood that dripped briefly from the corner of his mouth and a bruise that had stayed for several days after.

He didn't do anything to you for that. Not immediately.

It was when the job was over and the two of you were left alone in a location of Chrollo's choosing that he retaliated, using that ability that made your head feel like it was splitting in two as he forced you into doing things that you didn't want to do.

Again, the question surfaced: what kind of a Hunter were you that you allowed pain to keep you from fighting back?

…. One that had decided that 'Cute Hunter' was the direction to go in.

The slight self-deprecation of that thought wasn't lost on you. And it wasn't lost on you that it had come from Chrollo, his opinion sneaking its way into your brain without him needing to say anything or even knowing your own internal dialogue.

I hate this, you told yourself again.

It was the only thing you could say because it was the only thing you could do.

“It seems as though we're finished here, so I suppose you can leave,” Chrollo finally told you.

Without another word you stood and all but ran out of that room, having no desire to ever enter that place again and not wanting to risk Chrollo giving you more orders while you were still within earshot.

Chrollo himself remained seated, again gazing at the miniature field of lavender.

It wasn't right, you thought as you wiped away more tears.

Things shouldn't be this way.

Heading back to that main room where everyone else was gathered – because you'd be brought back there anyway if you went somewhere to be alone – your return was noted by all of the troupe, questioning eyes going to your form as you entered and made your way back to the spot in the corner you'd been occupying for the majority of your time here. Those questioning gazes didn't stay that way long, as one look at your tear stained face told them all that they needed to know as to how your corpse disposal had gone.

You had completed it. Everyone knew Chrollo wouldn't have let you leave without doing that. But as they continued to watch you, seeing the way you curled in on yourself and held your knees to your chest after you had taken a seat on the floor, all of them could tell that it hadn't been easy for you.

They couldn't understand it.

As they watched you obsessively and angrily wipe away the tears that you didn't want them to see, those members who had grown up with you were again at a loss as to why you cared so much about someone you didn't know. That, after the things you had experienced alongside them with your childhood in Meteor City, you had somehow managed to turn out so differently from the rest of them.

A few moments passed before Phinks got up from where he was sitting, and with his hands in his pockets, he began to walk towards you, no doubt with the intent of offering some kind of comfort. The harsh glare you sent him when he came close had him stopping in his tracks, and he floundered for a moment before turning around and returning to his seat, the awkward and disappointed look clear on his face as he did so.

You didn't want their pity or their comfort. You didn't want to be around them at all. No matter what they said, the childhood friends you had once had were nowhere to be found, not here or anywhere else in the world.

It was easier to tell yourself that the day Sarasa had been murdered, all of them had died along with her.

For the rest of this job, not another word would be said to you. You had done what was wanted of you, and so your role ended there. All you had left was the end of the job when Chrollo would force you to leave with him, making you follow him like a puppy. The troupe would part ways and then you might see a few of them sporadically between heists, but the majority of your time would be spent with Chrollo, and the head of the spider would return your reality to the one where your world revolved around him and him alone. Your abilities that you had wished to be shared with the world would be only for him, and again you would be forced to languish while you remained in his company, feeling a bit of yourself breaking apart day by day.

Maybe one day he would be successful.

Maybe one day he would manage to brainwash you and you would no longer find what they did so objectionable. Maybe a new version of yourself would emerge, one that had died just like they had with Sarasa, and you would walk around with them like a zombie, committing the same foul acts they did and feeling nothing while doing them. Maybe you would tell yourself the same things they must have, that all that mattered were those within the troupe, and in that way you could callously disregard the lives of others.

That wasn't today, though.

Eventually Feitan would return to where the body had been, no doubt needing to take a bit of time as he pulled the purple flowers that embraced his tools off one by one.

Eventually Chrollo would return to that main room and give instructions to the members that he had deemed necessary for the current job, and he would do so without casting a single glance in your direction.

The rest of the troupe would follow his lead, continuing with the job. Business as usual.

But at the back of their heads, they would remain hopeful for you.

Because if there was anyone who could fix you, it was Chrollo.

[iceyshenanigans]

GAME SPOILER ⚠⚠⚠⚠⚠⚠⚠⚠

[iceyshenanigans]

My thoughts whenever Mychael said something crazy during day 3

[iceyshenanigans]

Heard this audio and thought it related to my recent experience lol

[iceyshenanigans]

Someone’s jealous 🤭

[iceyshenanigans]

MDNI:

Essentially, it's because I will interact with stuff that isn't appropriate for a younger audience. Not only do the creators of such content not allow minors to interact with their work but also I'm not comfortable with that kind of interaction knowing the warnings about the mature content.