icantspellhocky

[icantspellhocky]

depressed steampunk guy: like nothing makes me happy anymore i feel like my fantastical flying contraption just ran out of coal

[icantspellhocky]

shj is soooo incredibly pathetic all the time in the side story and hyj deserves a medal for not just killing him with a gun.

[icantspellhocky]

"i'm keeping him as a pet" but not in a sexual way moreso like a fish in an aquarium

[icantspellhocky]

I think a lot about how we as a culture have turned “forever” into the only acceptable definition of success.

Like… if you open a coffee shop and run it for a while and it makes you happy but then stuff gets too expensive and stressful and you want to do something else so you close it, it’s a “failed” business. If you write a book or two, then decide that you don’t actually want to keep doing that, you’re a “failed” writer. If you marry someone, and that marriage is good for a while, and then stops working and you get divorced, it’s a “failed” marriage.

The only acceptable “win condition” is “you keep doing that thing forever”. A friendship that lasts for a few years but then its time is done and you move on is considered less valuable or not a “real” friendship. A hobby that you do for a while and then are done with is a “phase” - or, alternatively, a “pity” that you don’t do that thing any more. A fandom is “dying” because people have had a lot of fun with it but are now moving on to other things.

I just think that something can be good, and also end, and that thing was still good. And it’s okay to be sad that it ended, too. But the idea that anything that ends is automatically less than this hypothetical eternal state of success… I don’t think that’s doing us any good at all.

[icantspellhocky]

I’m not trying to turn your kids trans; that’s stupid. I’m trying to turn them into socialists.

[icantspellhocky]

been thinking abt it a lot the past few days, the thought of transfem!yoojin doing the rounds of coming out but having to add another name every time until it's like a comically long list.

[icantspellhocky]

doodling and remembered a year old sctir doodle page i was never quite happy with... so i just bashed today and the old version togrther. transparent version of my faves from today + little chibi faces if anyone wants em below the cut :)

[icantspellhocky]

based on this beautiful fic that i remembered recently

[icantspellhocky]

Superman, the Father of a Tyrant

The Observants prided themselves on their foresight. They guided Ghost King Pariah Dark’s reign, curbed his excesses to some extent, and prevented the Ghost Zone from descending into chaos...most of the time.

Now, however, they faced a unique problem: Pariah had an heir after his defeat at the hands of the Halfa. Heirs of kings—especially dictatorial, war-hungry ones—needed careful guidance to avoid repeating their predecessors' mistakes. The goal was not to teach them how to rule, but rather how not to. 

Before them stood infant Daniel "Danny" Fenton, also known as Danny Phantom, the hero. After the Ghostly Incursion War (GIW) bombing of Amity Park, they picked him up and took him to Clockwork. Now, they had to consider his future. They also had to consider how to prevent him from becoming depressed. They did just that by turning him into a child with Clockwork's help. It was much kinder that way, as no one in Amity Park had become a ghost from the anti-ghost bomb that the GIW had used. They had to make sure he is taken of. 

One Observant floated before the Council. "It is decided. We will send the heir of a tyrant to—"

Another Observant blinked after their leader finished to explain. "So they can learn from the worst?"

"Precisely. The mistakes of one mad ruler will be the lessons of the next. As we know that the other heroes would save the child and once he becomes king they know what to not do as Ruler. Seeing all the evil that Tyrant did. But still be ready to finish the job."

There was a murmur of agreement. After all, if a king was a dictator, the council only advised; they didn't make choices for him. Best of all, if the heir was out of the Zone, there was less paperwork.

After a brief and highly questionable magical procedure, Pariah’s heir was transformed into a human infant.

"Who shall we pick?"

The lead Observant’s single eyelid narrowed. "We don't really have a list, but I know just the man."

Clark and Lois's Apartment — Morning

Clark Kent was in the middle of making coffee when a green light suddenly filled the kitchen. An enormous floating eyeball appeared, holding a swaddled baby.

Clark blinked. "That's new."

"You are Kal-El," the observer intoned, "also known as Clark Kent."

"...Yes?"

The Observant unfolded a scroll with one of his hands. "Husband of Lois Lane?"

Clark frowned. "Yes, I—wait, why are you reading my bio like it's my Wikipedia page?"

"Here it states," the Observant continued in the same flat tone, "that you murdered her and your unborn child."

Clark froze. “What?!”

"Yes, after the Joker tricked you into it, of course. Also, Metropolis was destroyed by the nuke the Joker used. You executed the Joker in prison before Batman and then became a cruel tyrant who still insists he is a hero.”

“Excuse me?!”

The observer tilted its head. "Oh, wait. What year is it?”

Clark, still in shock, told him. There was an awkward pause.

"Ah," the Observant said. "We appear to be early. My apologies. We'll come back later, once everything has happened. It's time to search for another tyrant—"

A burst of green light appeared, and the baby vanished with the Observant. A thick file landed with a thunk on Clark’s kitchen table. Across the cover, in bold letters, was written: INJUSTICE: THE REGIME.

Clark opened it. Each page was worse than the last—transcripts, photos, battle reports, and atrocities. His hands trembled. He had seen dark futures before, but this...this was about him.

Then the green light returned. The One Eye being floated back in with the same baby.

"On second thought," it said, placing the infant in Clark's arms, "you are perfect for our purposes. Raise him as an example of what not to do as a tyrant. Ensure he learns that power must be balanced with mercy.”

Clark stared at the baby. Bright blue eyes blinked up at him. Tiny fingers grabbed his cape.

"I—what?"

"Temporary arrangement," the Observant said. "Until we find another tyrant. Where he can life under."

Then, it vanished, leaving Clark alone, holding a baby and with a horrifying knowledge of his possible future.

Fifteen minutes later, the Justice League's communication line rings.

Ring. Ring.

"Pick up! Pick up! Pick up—"

A click. "Clark," said Batman's gravelly voice. "What's the emergency?"

Clark’s voice was tight. "What's your plan if I go insane and the Joker tricks me into killing Lois? I kill him. Then Metropolis gets nuked and I establish myself as a global tyrant."

"That's oddly specific."

“A floating eyeball from another dimension just dropped off a massive file documenting my descent into madness and left me with a baby!”

There was a pause on the line. "Describe the baby."

"Human. Black hair, blue eyes. I have no idea where he came from. They said I’m supposed to teach him not to be a tyrant."

“I have a plan,” Batman said at last.

"That plan is not 'take the baby,'" Clark warned.

"... Fine. I’ll make a new plan.”

"You seriously had a plan to take a baby if I were given one?"

“Yes. For all League members. It’s in the file labeled Parental Failure Protocols.”

Clark’s jaw dropped. “You have plans to take babies from everyone?”

“Yes.” “How many oddly specific plans do you have?” "Several dozen."

"Bruce," Clark groaned. “There’s being prepared, and then there’s being incredibly paranoid.”

“Do you want my help or not?”

Clark sighed and glanced at the baby, who had tangled himself in Superman’s cape and was giggling. "Yes."

Later that night at Wayne Manor:

Bruce examined the child's DNA using the Batcomputer. "He's not from our world. I can tell you that part of his DNA is human; the rest, I'm not sure about."

"Neither was the floating eyeball," Clark muttered.

Alfred appeared with a bottle. "If Master Kent insists on keeping the child alive until the tyrant's plan is resolved, he should learn how to feed the child."

The baby let out a soft coo, and his eyes glowed faintly green for a moment before returning to their normal baby blue color. Bruce noticed.

"This is going to be a problem," he said flatly.

Clark crossed his arms. "He's just a baby."

"That's what they all say," Bruce replied, turning away. "I'm still not sure how your parents hid your powers." Try telling people you know he's a meta baby and see if that works."

Somewhere in the Ghost Zone:

The Observant floated back to the council chambers.

"Has the heir been placed?" "Yes, in the care of Kal-El." "Excellent. Will he learn humility?"

The lead Observant hesitated. "...Possibly. Either that, or Superman will learn to never become a tyrant in the first place. Either outcome is acceptable."

The others nodded.

After all, the Ghost Zone's paperwork load had just been dramatically reduced. The young heir was no longer there to bring chaos. As Clockwork didn't do anything, it must have been part of a plan.

Back in Metropolis — Two Days Later:

Clark sat on the couch, rocking the baby. According to the name stitched into his blanket, his name was Danny.

The future loomed large in his mind. The file sat on the coffee table, unopened since the first day.

Lois walked in, having returned from her work overseas, and raised an eyebrow. "Whose baby is this?"

Clark looked at her, deadly serious. "Lois, we need to talk about the Joker."

[icantspellhocky]

No Gotham Ghosts

The House of Mysteries is well warded, but not well enough apparently because in the middle of a shower, John's suddenly not alone in the bathroom.

There's a lot of screaming, from both parties, but the demon at least is also embarrassed and flies out the door. John finishes his hair and dries off quickly, noting the air doesn't smell like sulfur. Nor does he sniff that sharp pine scent he attributes to denizens of the high plane.

Not a demon. Not an angel.

Something else.

John composes himself as great as he can dressed in a boxer and towel and opens the bathroom door.

Softly glowing, the being hovers feet off the ground. His hips dissolve into a snake like tail studded with stars the twists and turns in opposition to the very still fur cape he wears. Above his white hair is a halo of rocks and dust that resembles Saturn's rings, but there's a white flame in the middle, easily confused for whisps of moving hair.

A Realms ghost. Between the power scale needed to slip past the wards and a headgear of flame and what might be a ring of ice, this is probably King Phantom.

John wishes he'd walked out with two towels - one to cover his boxers in addition to draping one in a way to hide his nipples.

Too late now. John clears his throat. "King Phantom, what a surprise."

Phantom, who'd been staring at the wall in a frown, turns toward John. Any embarrassment he might have felt about scaring John in the shower is gone. "Hellraiser. I come proposing a deal."

"Yeah?"

"You're destined for Hell, but I'll personally see to it that your soul never goes to that Realm if you solve a mystery for me."

John licks his lips. He'd learned how to weave a contract to save his soul, but this is a stronger guarantee of his safety. He's seen Hell. He'd do anything to avoid it.

"What's the mystery?"

"Why a single resident of this universe hasn't become a ghost in three centuries."

[icantspellhocky]

@important-cat-pics

[icantspellhocky]

controversial opinion but i think wes might be right

[icantspellhocky]

Posted in R/Trueoffmychest by u/GhostBoyfriendsThrowaway(Jason)

I(23M) have two boyfriends(both 21M). They are both brilliant, talented, amazing people. One of them is an investigative journalist(Who I’ll call W), and the other one is a formerly aspiring Astronaut who ended up losing the chance because of an injury that compromised his vision, and currently works as a mechanic(Who I’ll call D). I’ve been dating both of them for a while now, and the three of us moved in together earlier this year.

D has kids, who are wonderful. Me and W are both listed as emergency contacts for them, and if (God forbid) something happens to D, we’re listed to take care of them. I assumed this would stay true, but the specific arrangement would change over time, because our current one is kinda haphazard, and every time I try to pick them up for something I have to verify like three times that I am actually allowed to pick them up.

So, last week I proposed to W and D. I can’t imagine a life without them, and thought it seemed like an obvious next step. We’d kinda vaguely talked about it beforehand, but D always seemed slightly nervous about it for some reason? Well, I guess I just found out why.

He dropped a bombshell on me that wouldn’t even have occurred to me as a potential problem. Was I worried about him rejecting me? A little. But not fucking this.

Both D and W are from the same town in Illinois, which is apparently considered the ‘Most haunted town in America’ which I kinda assumed was mostly tourism PR. Turns out it’s not, and there are so many ghosts in the area that there’s some kind of chemical pollution through the entire town because of it. D’s parents were scientists in the area, who frequently worked with ghosts. Though according to D, ‘worked with’ is a generous assessment. But he and W both ended up with high enough levels of this chemical pollution in their blood that they’re legally considered fucking ghosts.

And due to a weird hole in the MRA(Meta Rights Act), and something called the ‘Anti-ecto acts’ that means that neither of them are legally considered human. So they can’t get married, no matter how much they want to.

D then started crying and apologising to me about this, as if it was somehow his fault. And apparently HIS FUCKING PARENTS are the people lobbying most strongly for the Anti-ecto acts, even though it meant they were literally making their own child lose human rights.

I’m not sure I fully know where I’m going with this, I just needed to get it out there. Like- How the fuck did this happen? How did these laws get passed? How did anyone at any point in this process think this was okay?

TLDR: I can’t get married to my boyfriends because they aren’t legally considered human because of a hole in the MRA. I don’t know either, man.

[icantspellhocky]

the funniest thing to come out of those batfam twitter au’s is the repeated gag of people getting mad at various batkids for insensitively ‘making fun’ of their dead brother by interacting with a ‘jason todd parody account’, and the kids don’t even try to defend themselves like ‘he’s dead idgaf’ while Totally Alive Jason Todd is in the replies like ‘i died just to get away from you’ and nobody ever mentions it outside of twitter. i think one day bruce is doing an interview when a reporter finally brings it up and he’s like ‘the kids are interacting with a what now’ and when he’s shown the tweets he just blinks a few times before going like ‘we all grieve in different ways,’ and then he pauses and squints at the screen before saying in a genuinely offended tone ‘does jason not follow me on twitter-!?’ and the reporter spends the next ten minutes trying to explain that it’s not jason because jason is dead while bruce completely ignores them just devastated that the parody account of his dead son isn’t following him on social media

[icantspellhocky]

Twitter AU - PFPs (Part 1)

Previous <- -> Next

I'm pleasantly surprised to see that people really like my idea! So I'm going to start doing this for fun, so to start, here are the twitter pfps! Rn, it's only the civilian identities, but I do also have another post for their hero/vigilante identities :3

Notes:

+ Yes, Dash's last name is purposefully spelled wrong (by me)

+ The links on the DP kids' pfps are real! I encourage you to check it out if you can! (Vlad's is not real)

+ Don't pay too much attention to time and dates. I usually make these at night and on random days.

+ This idea is by @im-totally-not-an-alien-2.

+ I also made this in the summer and then went off and on again, so just be aware of that 😭

[icantspellhocky]

Evil Father and his precious non biological daughter