i-dyllick-blog

[i-dyllick-blog]

hi, i’m posting here ( by the way this post is queued as opposed to live ) cause, as you might have noticed, i’m not in the server. if you never see this post then lmao valid

i’m taking a break from the server because my irl situation is stressful and my time is kinda limited. i’ll be back soon, but not rn. whether i’m back before my vacation or not is another matter. i’m not providing the details of my irl situation to you all cause i don’t think you as players necessarily need to be bogged down with the intricacies of my life, but know it’s been a combination of school factors, slow mental health decline over the past few months, and physical health decline. if i’m going to be a good moderator to you guys, i need the break to sort out some stuff.

yes, this is why monotheatre / chapter end took a while and why it may seem unfinished to you guys still considering the lack of a visual map for the new area. i’ll add that sometime this week.

if you’re interested in threading with haruto this chapter, i’m down for it ( DM me i guess ), but know that i’ll be slower because of everything i’ve alluded to already. for the record, if your only aim in the thread is to punch my oc, i’m not interested. i’m fine with your character disliking mine, sure, but i’m not here to rp your punching bag.

don’t feel obligated to rp with me nor feel obligated to DM me well wishes. as your moderator, i ask you enjoy your extended days and go easy on the mods please! mod kiki will be taking up a bigger role while i’m sorting out irl stuff and i’m very grateful for this fact.

i might be slower to reply to DMs because my depressive moods make it so i prefer to avoid contact outside a select few people. please avoid DMing me over mod matters until i’m back in the server. 

thanks. 

                                                                    - n

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...... | Haruto | Monotheatre | [RE: Kioku, Holokai]

The words come, they come and they come. They hit him but his expression turns placid. They’ll play the high ground; they’ll wear masks to make themselves look like they’re better people.

It’s every man for himself in this world.

He’s known this.

He still knows this.

“Thanks, Wasure. Our business is done, but I’ll still keep your secret. I never thought you could help my mother… everybody’s lied to me about that part anyway. Todoroki doesn’t need to help me either. You live your own life.”

“As for Holokai, who for some reason wasn’t listening, I’m not killing anyone. I’ll only kill you if you try and kill me. We keep our distance, and I won’t matter. Killing won’t get me anywhere at this point.”

He sighs a bit before folding his arms.

“As much as you guys want to assume things about my mother based on absolutely nothing, I’d say Reizei deserves more words. …Apologies, Reizei for taking that and all.”

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Confessor | Haruto | Monotheatre | [RE: Tsukiko, Arisa, Hiroyuki]

( tw: hospitalization, suicide ideation )

Haruto rolls his eyes as the responses begin to roll in.

“Oh, I would’ve. But I’m not letting anyone into my room. And then you would’ve been suspicious and then the game would’ve been up anyway. A calculated risk, but it was one anyway.”

“Everyone’s terrifying. I’m only as terrifying as the world taught me to be. It’s adapting.”

As for their resident cheerleader… that was a lot to take in. A lot of goading too. He decides to ignore the part about Kanon; bringing his girlfriend into it didn’t matter.

“My mother can’t do that. She’s been hospitalized since I’ve been five and dying. She’s only alive for as long as I can bring in money. I’ve been working since I’ve been five to keep her breathing– I gave up EVERYTHING for her– and for what? Her to tell me she wants to die? For her to tell me the world is unfair and that she’s hideous and that she’s a monster?”

“My video… well, it showed her out of the hospital but looking even worse than I remember. All that work I did… only for her to look like she’ll die if someone so much as blows on her? I need to get back and help her. She’s the only thing that I’ve lived for so you leave your petty insults out of it.”

Hiroyuki’s outburst next, he supposes.

“You never thought I was cool. You never knew me, like how none of you actually knew Abe. He wanted Komiya dead more than I did, that’s a fucking fact. I tell him I’ll help him get rid of Komiya and he’s all on board with it, knowing I’ll be the one to do all the dirty work for him. As if I’d do that for free.”

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Leave Ending | Haruto | Monotheatre | [RE: Mimi / ATTN: ALL]

( tw: suicide mention )

“No use handing over keycards; I’d never do that anyway. But while Reizei is talking, I’ll throw my hat in.”

Haruto wipes his eyes, putting back on his glasses and exhaling as he stands up straight and proper.

“I went as far as I could, but you’ll find out after the trial by trying to barge into my room, so I might as well admit it now… I killed Komiya and Abe.”

The change in demeanor is clear, Haruto’s gaze as sharp and cold as ice after everything.

“I’m not interested in killing anyone else cause I’d be at a disadvantage anyway, but I’ll do anything I can to live. I have to… I’m sorry everything took this turn, but my life has never been my own.”

“If anyone tries to kill me by the way, I’ll kill you and kill myself too. It’d be bad, but… I’d rather die at my own hands than let something else continue to control my life.”

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Chapel of the Order | Haruto | Trial 3 | [RE: Tsukiko, Azusa]

“I… I d-don’t think that’s true… I-I’m sorry to speak ill of the dead, but… Ayumu-san wasn’t that sharp. I don’t know if I believe he’d notice a change in honorifics… But…”

To be fair, that’s just conjecture. It’s not like they could ask Ayumu himself whether or not he would’ve noticed, but that in itself would have been a loaded question.

The blond takes a deep breath, trying to steady his voice as he holds a fist over his heart. 

“Saying my coin count now wouldn’t change anything, but… picking what team you’re on… wouldn’t choose where you went. It just says who you would have been on a team with… How could I have manipulated that, Azusa-san?!”

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That Place | Haruto | Trial 3 | [RE: Wakana]

Wakana was crying. Haruto finds himself being like a mirror to her, and though he had been trying to be strong this entire time, he quivers and then feels something hot trickle down his face.

…Ah. How long had it been since he cried in front of someone?

“I didn’t see it… I didn’t… Kioku-san can back me up. I was too scared to see it, and Kioku-san even s-suggested that I could delete Arisa-chan’s letter so I could see mine, but… w-we decided it’s better I didn’t watch my letter.”

He sees his glasses fog up and takes them off, but his vision still blurs.

“Wakana-san, I-I’m s-sorry it’s between us for some reason… I dunno why i-it’s like this, but I’m s…”

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Maria/Mary | Haruto | Trial 3 | [RE: Jito, Shu]

Ha. Of course. When it came down to deciding between him and Nishimura, of course the painter was going to side with her. The second there was a scapegoat, he’d throw focus onto him.

The things people did for love.

Still, Haruto steels himself and tries his best to stand his ground, shaking his head.

“It’s not weird at all… I don’t think? What I’m saying is that while the killer and Ayumu-san was on their way to the ship, maybe Lucky had yet to die. Lucky was left behind, dying… Couldn’t that be a possibility?”

“Also, Shu-san. Your argument doesn’t make sense… That literally works for me too? Kioku-san supports the fact I willingly let her destroy my letter. I was literally shaking and terrified when we talked…”

“I’m the same as Wakana-san.”

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Basement Cooler | Haruto | Trial 3 | [RE: SH1BA, Azusa, Kioku, Wakana, Kenta]

“…It sounds like you’re accusing me alongside Wakana-san.”

Haruto’s voice is lilting as he puts his perception of the trial plainly. He wears a wry smile and takes a deep sigh.

“…Maybe you’re being nice though because it’s circumstantial? Because you’re not sure? …Though you seem pretty sure that I’m not strong.”

“Things I can’t prove to you but I can tell you people have known about me since before this motive happened: I told Holokai-san that I can’t cook anything better than poached eggs. I told multiple people that I’m on the swim team. If you think I can be weak while being on a team then… that’s up to you.”

He pauses, thinking on the topic of honorifics.

“Mm. I think Kenta-san is right… I mean, we’ve all agreed that the killer planned this all out a lot. Why would they use their normal speech patterns on there…? They’d cover up everything, maybe even make a red herring, but let that be real…?”

Wakana suddenly gets an epiphany though. Though he’s visibly startled by her interjection, he mulls it over before contributing yet again:

“If I was the killer, why would I show the true extent of how well I can swim? Do we know how long it takes for Ayumu-san to die anyway? Or if the killer really left after Lucky-san died? Couldn’t he have died after Ayumu-san went to my lab…?”

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M1911A1 | Haruto | Trial 3 | [RE: Mayumi]

“Both teams seem like they found no evidence that the gun was used… It’s concerning, but… we can worry about that in the future.”

Time was finite, and a gun could very well be the thing that led them all to ruin.

“As for Ayumu-san, he was damp. But… if you say that, then that destroys the theory that he was on the surfboard. Where does that put us but… square one?”

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VCR | Haruto | Trial 3 | [RE: Jito, SH1BA]

“Wait, I’m not sure if it’s right to assume that the gun was thrown into the ocean… I mean, we swam in there and looked around, right? None of us noticed it there…”

“The gun, if it could be found, would’ve been during investigation, right?”

Then again, who’s looking in the ocean for a firearm anyway?

“…We know my letter got destroyed. But I’m not going to say who did it. That’s their choice, I think.”

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Toluca | Haruto | Trial 3 | [RE: Tsukiko, Mimi, Wakana]

Resting his voice was required, and though he didn’t think he would have to be silent throughout the entire trial, he still could not help but speak out when he saw the state their resident chemist was in.

“Tsukiko-san, a-are you okay?!”

His features are etched in concern and surprise both. What exactly had happened–?

Moving onwards though after it was explained in rather… concerning ways, Haruto kept quiet until their candid photographer brought up the surfboard.

“Actually… so, I might be wrong in this part, but I wanted to say something with the surfboard. If it’s there, could it have been used to transport someone or something…? Like… I dunno, I know my lab is in the ocean, but… the surfboard makes me think that even someone who can’t swim could’ve been a part of it…?”

“Regardless of if we think it’s the same killer or not, I think we can at least strike out Mimi-san from being the second killer. She saw the body first with me. But then again… it took our group to trigger the announcement, I think…”

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jitosbizzareadventure‌:

“Hmm… hmm… you think the lake would have something like that?  It would be quite the dirty lake if that as the case.  But hey, I won’t say no to a gift like that.”

Despite all his goodness, Jito to some extent was still a young man with… interests.

Which makes Haruto’s next comments all the more tease worthy in his mind.

“Hehe… hahahaha!”  

He just laughs as he tucks his hands into his pockets.  There were so many things he could say but one thing that was for certain was that he wouldn’t forget it.  

“Sounds like you’ve got a nice relationship.  I’m happy for ya!”

And a little envious.

“Heh, sounds like you friend wanted to impress you.  But I don’t think I’d be able to handle a lot of scary games without screaming a bunch too.  So maybe we really are a lot alike.  But I get what you mean… horror games have to be good with their story and stuff right?  Cause otherwise they’re just scare simulators… and I don’t think a lot of people are willing to spook themselves if there’s no good payoff like a good story or characters.  What’s your favorite game of that type?  Resident Evil?”

As for his own taste in games… 

“Me, no surprise but I like fighting and action games.  Even if I’m not really all that good at them, it’s just sort of fun to play.  There’s a lot to learn but sometimes it’s fun to just mash.”

“The lake could have anything as far as I’m concerned...”

He still has no idea what to do with the stuff he had gotten from it himself. Besides that, was it really that much a stretch for a dirty magazine to be there if Jito had clearly gotten both a video game magazine AND a big titty anime glasses wipe?

“Thanks... though you really have no reason to be happy for me, but thanks anyway again...”

So their resident construction painter was weak against horror too, huh? Haruto stashes away that information for later... just in case, you know.

“Early Resident Evil is pretty good... but I’m a big fan of Silent Hill 2. I’m not good enough at it to speedrun it... but I’ll never forget my first playthrough of it...! Oh, but I won’t spoil the ending for you, of course. It’s the kind of psychological story you need to go through yourself. But... it’s helped me a lot. You could even say it raised me.”

Though would it really be possible for them to play it here? It seemed like a waste to use his coins just to ask for a video game...

“Oh, you really ARE like Aki-kun. Er, that’s the guy I’ve known. He loves fighting games too, but all he really does is button mash. Heheh. I wonder... what kind of fighters do you prefer to play as? He likes brawler-types, but if there’s a werewolf, he chooses that character no matter what.”

Gambler's Fallacy | Haruto | CH3 | [ATTN: Jito]

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shslcandidphotos‌:

“If they were chocolate coins, I’d..! I’d eat them instead. Since they’re not, I think they’d be better going to someone else, and… I’m sure you can get lots of things from the lake at least…! Maybe.. there’s something in there that can cheer you up a bit?”

She thought back onto Haruto’s expression back near the end of trial. He was really scared then, wasn’t he? She wasn’t sure what she could do, but surely, there’d be something in those watery depths to help out. Haruto’s luck seemed to be great after all!

Mimi looked sheepish, lightly scuffing her boot against the floor.

“It’s.. It’s actually the letters that scare me the most. Well, I don’t think it’s nice to hurt someone like that motive thing and all, but the letter is the fishiest to me… It sounds nice, but..! Is it really a good idea to put a loved one in danger like that..? I’d rather not risk them being contacted by Monokumi-san or something. They could get dragged into something scary..!. Like, I’d want to know what happened to a person of my choice over a building instead, so it’s even weirder that it’s not available as a prize..? It’s almost as if… Well, nevermind..”

“…I don’t mean to be such a worrywart about it. If it helps to know, I think I’m reading too much into it..? I’m probably wrong. Thank you though… I tend to think with muscles more than anything else, but..! Don’t forget about yourself, Haruto-kun! You’re super smart!”

Cheer me up a bit...? Ah, he’s being pitied right now. Maybe not him in particular -- everyone in this class is in as bad a situation as him currently after all -- but the possibility doesn’t leave his mind.

“Ah, you’re right. I didn’t consider that... but I feel like they’re probably already dragged into this with us if we have the option at all. Either that, or it’s a false promise to get us to waste our coins.”

Haruto folds his arms over his chest, contemplating their circumstances.

“No, I think you think with your head a fair bit too. You’re the one who decided to do a check that one time, and you jump forward with threads of logic in trials...”

“If someone doesn’t notice that, they’re too worried to think about how everyone here contributes, I think...”

Spectacled Bear | Mimi | Chapter 3 | Closed [Haruto]

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pinkpuumps‌:

“Yeah! We were, like, in the same kindergarten class! He was the prince, and I was the princess, and we were basically destined to be besties!”

“Y-Yeah…We…Yeah. He’s my best friend ever. He’s basically family. I’d do just about anything for him–well, no, that’s a lie. I would do literally anything for him. It…There wasn’t a whole lot of effort on my end, I guess. Heh. I just sorta love being with him, even when he’s being a bit annoying. Still! I’m glad you’re doing alright.”

It’s a miracle she and Mitsugi manage to communicate with their mutual reliance on autocorrect. Maybe it’s a secret language that only True Morons can understand.

“Why not? Sure, it might be a bit hard to believe, but I bet she would if you’re usually not the joking type, right? Well, like, crazy joking type.”

“Hey, hey, don’t think like that, Sono-kun! I’m sure she knows something is up, and you didn’t just vanish. I bet she’s waiting for you because that’s what true love does, right? I don’t like thinking about those two years, but I’m sure everything is…everything is okay.”

A prince and princess, huh? The bourgeois of kindergarten banding together then, he resolves, nodding silently in affirmation of his own conclusion.

“Y’know, most people would swap those two around -- say literally first and then take a step back. ...Not that there’s anything wrong with pledging yourself like that. Devotion like that is hard to come by, I’d say.”

He hopes it’s pretty apparent through his voice at least that he means that as a compliment.

His face brightens up a bit as Arisa tries to dash away his fears, but his face twists a bit with the last few words she says.

“...It’ll be okay.”

He says it, regaining the normalcy from before once the words are out of his mouth.

“I hope so anyway... I think though I can’t even explain because well... Monokumi has to check these letters first, right? Maybe it’d be better if I came up with some lie then? Something like, ‘I got a family emergency to take care of, sorry...’?”

In My Restless Dreams | Haruto | CH3 | [ATTN: Arisa]

[i-dyllick-blog]

shslcandidphotos‌:

“Eep!”

An equally surprised squeak escaped her in response to Haruto’s own reaction, but after the initial wave of fear ebbed, Mimi’s brows furrowed in confusion.

“Eh? Do I..? Monomi-chan said it was okay to give away coins though. I’m not really interested in any of the prizes and stuff, and you were the first person I saw. They’re all yours now.”

She skipped over the part where Monomi mentioned that she should also be wary about it too, but her caution had its grasp on something else. The photographer was rather reluctant to ask, not wanting to be a spoilsport for the casino.

“Hey, Haruto-kun…? Have you seen the… Well, what do you think about the prizes?”

“You’re not interested, huh? ...I guess that explains why you’d give me these, then.”

He lets go of her sleeve then, the sense of confused, panicking urgency fleeing him. He can’t help but think there must be something lucky about him though -- at least in Hadean Station -- if that was really the reason why Mimi was giving him all these coins.

After all, it’s not like Mimi was close to him or had any reason to bestow anything to him other than him being at the right place at the right time.

“I think the prizes are something we should keep in mind. I mean... it’s all too easy to just think everyone wants to go for the letters, but... there’s some other things there we shouldn’t forget. Like the fact someone can betray someone else as a cheaper option, or the fact there’s apparently some kind of mastermind...”

“...I bet you already were thinking about those things though, right? You’re pretty smart yourself, you know.”

Spectacled Bear | Mimi | Chapter 3 | Closed [Haruto]

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mango-fight‌:

Shu won’t call Haruto out about his shoe. No worries. The comment about the clothes gets an amused look from her.

“As long as it’s not so tight that it’s restrictive, I think it’d be nice to wear. Spandex has a lot of flexibility.”

She pinches and pulls at the sleeve of the costume, admiring the fabric’s elasticity.

“I guess it might be weird to try one of these on, huh? Probably a little… Rude, maybe? What do you think? I wouldn’t want to insult his memory or anything.”

Especially since she and Kanpei hadn’t talked or anything.

“Yeah... I guess that’s the main appeal of them. But I dunno... I still think wearing less body-conforming things is the way to go. Just don’t drown yourself in layers and frills.”

He says as they just recently got a lab that provided only that.

He moves closer, still maintaining a polite distance between Shu and himself but a smaller gap to make conversing less awkward.

“Well... I’ll be the only one to have to know you did.”

“I get that you’re trying to be respectful, but... if we don’t use things just because people died, then we’d be kinda wasteful... I think it’s bad to tie yourself to ghosts anyway. Remember them, but don’t let them stop you from living your life. Carry on what they give you and... I think that’s the best thing to do for them really.”

Awfully poetic words for just talking about putting on a sentai suit.

Teenagers with Attitude || Shu || CH3 || Closed for Haruto

[i-dyllick-blog]

shsl-sh1ba‌:

What a wild question to ask someone!

“…”

Well it wasn’t like Fumiko liked lying or anything.

“Yeah I do… IDK, music is more fun when other people are involved. Even during the rough times I still thought idol work was kinda worth it if I- I got to sing with other people… Now all I can do is perform for other people and while it’s nice to, IDK, be more open and honest…”

“…But I wouldn’t mind lying more if it meant I could perform with others again.”

They take a moment to compose themselves. As they spoke something seemed softer and their eyes seemed a little glossier. 

But just like that, Fumiko was back in action as the mad dog with a bite she was known for. 

“Nah, that’s just about right! It’s tougher now that I’m independent since I have to basically be in charge of every step that goes into production. But I guess that makes it more real and authentic. You know, more me!” 

“Jito and Shu are good at talking like how they talk; you’re good for talking like how you talk.“ They weren’t backing down from this. “Besides, I think you’re pretty good at talking to people your own age. But there’s no point in me saying this if you aren’t going to believe it yourself. Just know you got someone your age who enjoys talking to you!”

But still this doting business was a little… something! 

“Really?” They didn’t see it. “It’s not offensive or anything… IDK, it’s the first time anyone has ever said that to me so…”

“It’s a lil bit embarrassing…!”  

“Hm... I guess I’m not sure if I see the appeal. Sorry. I feel like singing with people you don’t like doesn’t sound fun? Maybe I’m just being pessimistic... I mean, eventually you’d have to find someone you had fun with.”

There are as many people on this earth as there are fish in the ocean. Perhaps that metaphor was wrong too though. Maybe it was foolish to think that just because there was so much of something, at least one thing in the whole group would be good.

After all, all it takes is one apple to spoil the whole bunch.

“The real you, huh? Sounds liberating. I’m glad you still have your sense of self. I’ve always thought from afar that the idol industry kinda... seems like the type to suck away your soul if you weren’t lucky enough to be able to just market your true self.”

“...Well, even then, it probably finds a way to sell your core. After all, you don’t really get to have privacy or the complete freedom to live life. You’re you... but another you could’ve been happier if things were just only slightly different...”

“...Shit. Sorry, I’m saying things I don’t know about again.”

He shakes his head, face twisting with remorse. He didn’t need to mansplain to SH1BA about the very industry she had worked so hard to call out. 

This wasn’t his war to fight.

“If it’s embarrassing, I’ll stop talking about it. But... I think it’s useful to know how other people see you. You’re always protective of Ayumu-san. You kinda threatened me after the whole unicorn thing, remember?”

Shovel Get | Haruto | CH3 | [ATTN: SH1BA]