i-am-sleepyzz

[i-am-sleepyzz]

mizuena/ena5 incoherent rant below bc i love them so much im losing my mind

I can't stop thinking about how much of mizuki's conflict in prsk is resolved entirely by ena's actions, not mizuki's own, and that's actually really fucking good. hear me out.

One of the driving emotions for Mizuki's conflict is obviously fear; she's afraid of being left once people know her secret, she's afraid she can only ever have shallow connections with people who wouldn't really accept her as who she is, she's afraid of losing the few friends she has and the one space where she feels like she can express herself through their shared art.

But beyond that, the other driving emotion for her is guilt. She feels guilty that she's been "deceiving" everyone else, she feels guilty that she's left Ena waiting for so long without telling her her secret, she feels guilty that everyone else seems to be moving forward and facing their fears while she seemingly can't. And when her secret is revealed, the strongest emotion she's going through isn't her fear of being left behind, it's the guilt that's been eating her away from the inside.

She tells ena that it can't be the same, that now ena won't be able to treat her the same, that she knows Ena and Kanade and Mafuyu are so kind they'll smile and tell her they're fine with it, but that they'll just be forcing themselves for the sake of kindness. That they'd rather not have to deal with everything that makes Mizuki complicated, but they would anyway because they're kind like that. That she can't bear that. She doesn't deserve that.

And all of this guilt is so real for this young trans girl to feel because it's what we're pushed towards constantly, even when we're supposedly accepted for who we are. The lie that we're deceiving others when we present as our own gender is so deeply written into our collective psyche, and even beyond that, even in "progressive" spaces, the violence we suffer is often treated as our own burden to bear, as something we have to deal with and not burden other people with.

So many basic bitch stories about trans women, with trans women protags written by cis people, have them struggle and "grow" as the story progresses, having to "face their fears", to come out to people they're scared of leaving them, to "trust their loved ones" and take that first step. I think a lot about The Missing, a game that gets a lot of the horror of being a trans girl and yet still has the protagonist, who is so terrified of how her mom would react to her coming out she tries to end her own life, learn the lesson that she should come out anyway, trust this person that's only given her reasons to fear her, because that's the only way for her to move forward.

Mizuki doesn't do that. She doesn't have to. Mizu5 is all about the horror of being outed before you're ready to come out yourself, even to someone you know would show you kindness. And it allows Mizuki to stew in her own guilt, the guilt that she never faced her fears herself, that she's burdening N25 with her suffering. But Ena5 is about Ena, so patient and unwilling to hurt Mizuki, finally being moved to action by kaito and meiko agreeing that it's up to her to be selfish and try to bring Mizuki back, to recognize that Mizuki doesn't want to be alone.

It's up to Ena to do the scary thing, for her to be open and vulnerable about her feelings. For her to go up to Mizuki, despite being ignored for so long, as someone who is so sensitive to being ignored- to being rejected- and to tell Mizuki what she needs- and deserves- to hear. That she's wanted. That Ena doesn't care if Mizuki thinks she deserves it or not, that Mizuki's guilt shouldn't factor in because Ena wants Mizuki beside her.

It's the ultimate transfem fantasy because it's the fantasy of being truly wanted, of being unconditionally loved. It's the fantasy of someone seeing you for who you are, and not just "accepting you" as if it's a favor they're doing you, but going as far as telling you that the way you've been conditioned by a lifetime of violence to feel and act to protect yourself is NOT your fault, it's NOT just your responsibility to deal with, that you deserve someone who will go through the effort of digging you out of that hole and that you're not a burden for needing that.

In a lot of subtle ways, Mizuki's story feels 1000% written by people who understand trans girls so far beyond the scope of the usual explaining-transness-to-cis-people style of narrative, even understanding ways that these narratives fuck up routinely and also understanding exactly what is needed to sneak this into a highly commercial hatsune miku gacha game. There's a lot of compromises made there for the sake of being this kind of story in this kind of game, but what we get in return is so much more meaningful as a transfem narrative than anything of similar popularity that I can think of, it fills me with so much emotion and I truly can't fathom believing it's somehow "bait" or "not real rep" unless you've never had to think about transmisogyny and how it emotionally affects you to this degree.

I'll never stop thinking about them. Congrats on the wedding mizuki and ena. someone like ena is exactly what every trans girl deserves, and never has someone proven herself more deserving of a trans girl's love than ena. i love them both so much my heart feels like it's going to explode whenever i think of them. huge thanks to everyone involved in creating their story

[i-am-sleepyzz]

Espurr's Dreams 💜🩷

I wish there was a Espurr's full art tcg card so here's my take on what kind of illustration I envision for it :D

[i-am-sleepyzz]

Listen to the pain ring, she wants to deliver a message to you because she has hope that you will help her and my family, just like the people did. You say the meaning. We hope you hear what you have to say and don't forget it. Even a little money changes her psychology.

Thank you very much for helping my family😭💔🇵🇸

Need.https://gofund.me/36240bc1

Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #133 ) Vetted here by @90-ghost

@writergirl719 @mklnet

[i-am-sleepyzz]

‼️Very important ‼️

✅vatted by association click here ✅

Hi guys thank you for your great support but we still need help badly as I am trying to rebuild my life and pay for my studies 💔😭😭

I am facing many difficult challenges such as providing clean water for me and my family and trying to provide internet so I can stay in touch with you so any donation you make will help me rebuild my life and dreams again your support is important to me 😭💔💔

Please🙏

[i-am-sleepyzz]

gaza-evacuation-funds

My name is Osama Basil, a web developer from Gaza. Over the past 10 months, I’ve witnessed the devastation of war firsthand. My office, where I devoted myself to my work, was destroyed, along with my source of income and future aspirations.The situation in Gaza grows more difficult each day, with destruction becoming a constant part of our reality. We've lost friends, colleagues, and loved ones, leaving our community deeply scarred.But I refuse to surrender. Despite the displacement and loss, I am committed to rebuilding my career and life. The war took my job, dreams of marriage, and a chance to pursue a master’s degree in programming and web design. After fleeing to Rafah with my family, I’ve been living in a tent for months, grappling with unstable access to electricity

@el-shab-hussein @nabulsi @irhabiya @wellwaterhysteria @appsa @stuckinapril

[i-am-sleepyzz]

🚨 We Need Your Kindness to Survive 🚨

Hello, My name is Mosab Elderawi, and I live in Gaza with my family. Life here has become harder than I ever imagined, and I’m writing this with hope in my heart that you might hear our story.

The ongoing war has devastated my family. We’ve lost 25 family members—each one a beloved part of our lives, taken too soon. I miss them deeply—their laughter, their presence, their love. Every day is a reminder of this unimaginable loss.

64.media.tumblr.com

64.media.tumblr.com

64.media.tumblr.com

64.media.tumblr.com

64.media.tumblr.com

We are now facing daily challenges to survive—things that most people take for granted, like food, clean water, and a safe place to sleep. The harsh realities of life here have replaced our dreams with the constant fight for survival.

Our Current Situation:

💔 Lost Stability: The war has left us without work or a stable source of income. 🍞 Basic Needs: Food and water are becoming harder to afford with rising prices and scarce resources. 📚 Dreams on Hold: Like so many here, my family’s dreams have been replaced by the need to simply survive. 😢 Unimaginable Loss: Losing 25 loved ones has left a void that can never be filled.

How You Can Help:

I’m sharing our story with the hope that someone out there might care. Even $5 can make a big difference for us, and if you’re unable to donate, just reblogging this post can help spread the word.

Your kindness, no matter how small, is something we’ll never forget.

What This Means to Us:

Your support is not about changing our entire situation—it’s about giving us a little relief, a little hope, and a way to keep going. We are not asking for much, and we understand if you can’t donate. Sharing our story is just as valuable to us as a donation.

Thank you for reading this far. It means the world to us to know that someone is listening. Your kindness gives us strength and helps us believe in a better tomorrow.

With all our gratitude, Mosab Elderawi and Family ❤️

✅️ Vetted by ✅️

@gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #309 )✅️

@fancysmudges @brokenbackmountain @just-browsing1222-deactivated20 @mothblossoms @aleciosun @fluoresensitive @khizuo @lesbiandardevil @transmutationisms @schoolhater @timogsilangan @appsa @buttercuparry @sayruq @malcriada @palestinegenocide @sar-soor @akajustmerry @annoyingloudmicrowavecultist @feluka @tortiefrancis @flower-tea-fairies @tsaricides @riding-with-the-wild-hunt @visenyasdragon @belleandsaintsebastian @ear-motif @kordeliiius @brutaliakhoa @raelyn-dreams @troythecatfish @theropoda @tamarrud @4ft10tvlandfangirl @queerstudiesnatural @northgazaupdates2 @skatezophrenic @awetistic-things @camgirlpanopticon @baby-girl-aaron-dessner @nabulsi @sygol @junglejim4322 @heritageposts @chososhairbuns @palistani @dlxxv-vetted-donations @illuminated-runas @imjustheretotrytohelp

[i-am-sleepyzz]

🚑🚑🚨🚨🚨

please help me on children 😭😢

Hello, my name is Mahmoud from Gaza. I have four children... Since October 7th, everything has been destroyed. Our house was bombed and my children, Rital and Lian, were injured. She is sick with nerves and needs treatment. Also, my wife was injured in the spine and needs treatment abroad...

I want you to donate and help my children or share this post with others.. Thank you very much for your support and generosity towards us....

🙏🍉🍉🇵🇸🇵🇸

[i-am-sleepyzz]

I am Haifa from Gaza🍉🇵🇸🍉, Palestine, mother of three children, we have faced many physical and psychological problems because of the war Destroy our house completely and our source of income My children's health was destroyed by contaminated water and contaminated food. We live in a cloth tent, my children shivering cold. My son Youssef, 8 years old, had ambitions to become an engineer, but the occupation destroyed his talent. Jory and Joan, the fun twins full of humor and fun in our house, they are 6 years old, deprived of my children's education. Other than that, the price of food has become very expensive My kids make me cry heartburn because I can't provide for them because I don't have the money Please support me with money until I achieve my goal and share my bond My regards to youx🍀🌹

Donating even $10 can help.🙏🏻🙏🏻

✅️Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #356 )✅️

[i-am-sleepyzz]

‼️Very important ‼️

✅vatted by association click here ✅

Hi guys thank you for your great support but we still need help badly as I am trying to rebuild my life and pay for my studies 💔😭😭

I am facing many difficult challenges such as providing clean water for me and my family and trying to provide internet so I can stay in touch with you so any donation you make will help me rebuild my life and dreams again your support is important to me 😭💔💔

Please🙏

[i-am-sleepyzz]

Hello dear .. My name is Abdul Rahman Halas, married to the martyred journalist Alaa Al-Dahdouh. My journalist wife works for the Watan News Agency and we had a beautiful child named Karam. The real disaster began on Wednesday, May 31, 2024, when my wife, my child and I were surprised by a huge missile that fell on us and exploded in the place where we were, targeting the house we fled to and other neighboring houses

. At that moment, my journalist wife Alaa hugged our child Karam to protect him from the hell of the missile, but she turned into pieces and died immediately. My child Karam and I miraculously escaped certain death when the pressure of the missile threw me a long distance, which resulted in me being injured by numerous shrapnel and multiple injuries that led to severe fractures in my leg and damage to the nerves in my hand and foot and various shrapnel in different parts of my body

. My wife is a journalist covering the crimes of genocide against defenseless civilians in the Gaza Strip. With the intensification of the bombing and the scarcity of food and water, my wife and I struggled daily to secure food for our only child Karam, who was also suffering from severe fear because of The brutal bombing of the Gaza Strip.

Now after the disaster that befell my family, I need your generous support to overcome my ordeal and pay for my treatment and surgeries. I need several surgeries outside the Gaza Strip that cost a lot of money, and I am in dire need of your tears and support.

I am confident that after reading my sad story, you will sympathize with me and share with me and will not leave me and my child Karam alone.

Donate to me or share my campaign with your friends to donate to me

No matter how small your donation is, it means to me a chance for me and my child to be treated and to stay safe.

[i-am-sleepyzz]

🚨 We Need Your Kindness to Survive 🚨

Hello, My name is Mosab Elderawi, and I live in Gaza with my family. Life here has become harder than I ever imagined, and I’m writing this with hope in my heart that you might hear our story.

The ongoing war has devastated my family. We’ve lost 25 family members—each one a beloved part of our lives, taken too soon. I miss them deeply—their laughter, their presence, their love. Every day is a reminder of this unimaginable loss.

64.media.tumblr.com

64.media.tumblr.com

64.media.tumblr.com

64.media.tumblr.com

64.media.tumblr.com

We are now facing daily challenges to survive—things that most people take for granted, like food, clean water, and a safe place to sleep. The harsh realities of life here have replaced our dreams with the constant fight for survival.

Our Current Situation:

💔 Lost Stability: The war has left us without work or a stable source of income. 🍞 Basic Needs: Food and water are becoming harder to afford with rising prices and scarce resources. 📚 Dreams on Hold: Like so many here, my family’s dreams have been replaced by the need to simply survive. 😢 Unimaginable Loss: Losing 25 loved ones has left a void that can never be filled.

How You Can Help:

I’m sharing our story with the hope that someone out there might care. Even $5 can make a big difference for us, and if you’re unable to donate, just reblogging this post can help spread the word.

Your kindness, no matter how small, is something we’ll never forget.

What This Means to Us:

Your support is not about changing our entire situation—it’s about giving us a little relief, a little hope, and a way to keep going. We are not asking for much, and we understand if you can’t donate. Sharing our story is just as valuable to us as a donation.

Thank you for reading this far. It means the world to us to know that someone is listening. Your kindness gives us strength and helps us believe in a better tomorrow.

With all our gratitude, Mosab Elderawi and Family ❤️

✅️ Vetted by ✅️

@gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #309 )✅️

@fancysmudges @brokenbackmountain @just-browsing1222-deactivated20 @mothblossoms @aleciosun @fluoresensitive @khizuo @lesbiandardevil @transmutationisms @schoolhater @timogsilangan @appsa @buttercuparry @sayruq @malcriada @palestinegenocide @sar-soor @akajustmerry @annoyingloudmicrowavecultist @feluka @tortiefrancis @flower-tea-fairies @tsaricides @riding-with-the-wild-hunt @visenyasdragon @belleandsaintsebastian @ear-motif @kordeliiius @brutaliakhoa @raelyn-dreams @troythecatfish @theropoda @tamarrud @4ft10tvlandfangirl @queerstudiesnatural @northgazaupdates2 @skatezophrenic @awetistic-things @camgirlpanopticon @baby-girl-aaron-dessner @nabulsi @sygol @junglejim4322 @heritageposts @chososhairbuns @palistani @dlxxv-vetted-donations @illuminated-runas @imjustheretotrytohelp

[i-am-sleepyzz]

My name is Mohammed Ayyad from Gaza. My wife, children and I were displaced quickly since the first days of the war on Gaza, leaving behind all our wealth and dreams. We are forced to leave our home and live in the south of Gaza, Rafah.

A few days after we left the house and went to the south (Rafah) we announce our tactics to our home with ease our beautiful next and destroyed everything we owned. Everything we had went with the wind, we are now working in hell (the tent) suffering one from collecting wood to cook food which is clearly difficult to produce from the water that was spread and is polluted by the cursed war and our work we lose our source of livelihood.

I became a desperate refugee and dug into a very small tent, without water and food life became horrible and sad with the disappearance of the need to survive. It is a struggle for survival.

Because of the continuous bombing and the difficulty of living with the high expectations our life is security our life is peace, we ask generous people to donate to service our planes. Our lives are threatened at any time, and everyone is exposed and death is not. We have never been safely moved to a place until war, and we have never lost our lives at any moment. Every little contribution counts, and your donation, small and big, makes an impact and helps improve safety and compatibility.

@appsa

[i-am-sleepyzz]

same voice actor!!!!!

[i-am-sleepyzz]

Traumatized in Ireland While my Family is Facing Death and Starvation in Gaza

Note: Vetted by:

1. @el-shab-hussein and @nabulsi # 151 on the spreadsheet of Vetted Gaza Fundraisers List]

2. @riding-with-the-wild-hunt Here .

I contemplate the happy faces of people around me here in Ireland and reminisce about the happy normal life my family and I had before the war. A life that turned into a distant memory for us and was replaced by an unending series of horrible nightmares.

Unlike my family in Gaza, people here have access to drinking water, all types of food, electricity, and a roof over their heads. Above all, they are safe, and I cannot help but wonder if they genuinely do appreciate these blessings in their lives enough.

People seem relaxed and laughing wholeheartedly around me in Ireland. I wish I could laugh too, but I am crushed way beyond recovery on the inside. I was evacuated by my Irish college after five months of living the horrors of war in Gaza. I hope you will never know what it feels like to live in constant fear and worry and be horrified by the most sickening and scary nightmares every single night while you are far away from your family in such circumstances.

When did my people in Gaza cease to be human beings worthy and deserving of a normal life? Has it become normal now for my family in Gaza to be starved and killed while the whole world is watching the genocide? If that is the case, then you will have to excuse me if I seek every avenue to bring them to Ireland and start a new normal life like all people here around me.

I was assured by the Irish Reugee Council (IRC) and lawyers in Ireland that there is hope I can reunite with my family in Ireland. In difficult times, it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel. For me and my family, you are literally our light and hope for a better life.

SOS!

Please donate, reblog and share.

Tagging for reach <3

Please consider boosting my campaign.

@fancysmudges @brokenbackmountain  @mothblossoms

@aleciosun @fluoresensitive @khizuo @lesbiandardevil

@transmutationisms @schoolhater @timogsilangan @appsa

@buttercuparry @sayruq @malcriada @palestinegenocide

@sar-soor @akajustmerry @annoyingloudmicrowavecultist @feluka

@tortiefrancis @flower-tea-fairies @tsaricides @visenyasdragon

@belleandsaintsebastian @ear-motif @kordeliiius @brutaliakhoa

@raelyn-dreams @troythecatfish @theropoda @tamarrud

@4ft10tvlandfangirl @queerstudiesnatural @northgazaupdates2

@skatezophrenic @awetistic-things @camgirlpanopticon @baby-girl-aaron-dessner

@nabulsi @sygol @junglejim4322  @chososhairbuns

@palistani @dlxxv-vetted-donations @illuminated-runas

@imjustheretotrytohelp @stil-lindigo @soon-palestine

@communistchilchuck @irhabiya  @sar-soor @ibtisams

@rebecca-levin-art @ana-bananya @vakarians-babe

@mangocheesecakes @rednines @elderling

@sour-soda @stiltonbasket @hello-kitty-milkshake @butchmartyr

@laurellament @saltyfinalboss @dirtangeldean @lesbianslasherfilm

@teethands @miwtual @beserkerjewel @el-shab-hussein

@thedragonagelesbian @the-eldritch-it-gay @mazzikah

@mahoushojoe @deepspaceboytoy  @rhubarbspring @pcktknife

@heritageposts @gazavetters @neechees @butchniqabi @khanger

@autisticmudkip @beserkerjewel @furiousfinnstan @xinakwans

@stopmotionguy @willgrahamscock @strangeauthor @bryoria

@shesnake @legallybrunettedotcom @lautakwah @sovietunion

@7bitter @toiletpotato @fromjannah @omegaversereloaded

[i-am-sleepyzz]

“My Story: A Boy Fighting for His Family”

My name is Ahmed, and I am 15 years old. I never thought I would have to carry the weight of my entire family, but here I am, fighting every day to keep them alive.

We lost my father in the war. He went out one day to find food for us because we were starving. It was dangerous, but he had no choice. He never came back. He was injured and bled to death because there was no one to help him. Our neighbors found his body and buried him because we couldn’t even afford a proper burial. That day, we lost everything—our protector, our provider, and our hope.

Now, it’s up to me. I am the eldest son, and I have to take care of my mother, my twin brother Ahmed Abed, and my two little sisters. Every morning, I go out to find work. I earn barely $1 or $2 a day, which isn’t enough to buy bread for all of us. My brother started working too, but it’s the same for him. We rely on bread and whatever humanitarian aid we can get, but it’s never enough.

Winter is here, and it’s freezing. We don’t have warm clothes, blankets, or even a heater. We lost everything in the war, and the little we have now is falling apart. We live in a rented apartment, and the landlord is pressuring us for rent we can’t pay. I don’t know what will happen to us if he throws us out.

I want my brother to become a doctor. It’s my biggest dream. I want him to help people, to save lives, because no one was there to save our father. I’m ready to sacrifice everything—my childhood, my education, even my life—if it means my family can survive and my brother can have a future.

Please, if you’re reading this, help us. We don’t have much time. My family needs food, warmth, and a safe place to live. I just want to see my mother and sisters smile again, and I want my brother to have a chance to achieve his dream. You can be the reason we survive. You can be the hope we desperately need.

[i-am-sleepyzz]

Support My Family Journey to Safety and Peace

🚨Urgent Appeal 🚨

My name is Jaber Al-Haj. I am from Gaza, married to my wife, Menna, and we have a little son named Hashim, who is less than two years old. Like any Palestinian family, we dreamed of a simple and stable life. But the recent war turned our lives upside down. The sounds of explosions never left us, and fear has become part of our daily existence. My son Hashim suffers from health problems that urgently require treatment, but the war has destroyed everything, including the healthcare system, making access to necessary medical care nearly impossible. With each passing day, our suffering deepens, and the fear for Hashim’s health and future consumes me.

Alongside my small family, I used to work with my brothers, Aboud and Bilal, on our joint project—a small lab for producing essential household cleaning products. We started this project with modest resources, dreaming that it would become a source of income to support us and provide job opportunities for our community. But the war left us with nothing. Our lab, which was once filled with life and hard work, was reduced to rubble under the bombardment. We lost our equipment, our livelihood, and with it, a part of our dreams for the future.

Even our home, our only refuge, did not escape the destruction. It was severely damaged and is now uninhabitable. We were forced to flee and live in a tent under harsh conditions unfit for human life. The cold, the heat, the lack of resources, and the absence of privacy have made life nearly unbearable. We try to cope, but every day brings new challenges and suffering.

Today, what worries me the most is my son Hashim's condition. His health is deteriorating, and he desperately needs treatment abroad. However, under the circumstances we’re living in, I lack the means to secure his travel and medical expenses. As a father, there is nothing more heartbreaking than watching my child suffer while being unable to help him.

This campaign is a lifeline for my family in our darkest hour. With your generosity, we can bring hope back into our lives and secure a better future for my son, Hashim. Every contribution, no matter how small, makes a world of difference.

Please support us through the links below:

👉Donation link

👉Paypal Link

Thank you for standing with us and helping us through this difficult time. Your kindness means more than words can express.

With heartfelt gratitude, Jaber AlHaj

✅ My Campaign ✅ 🔍Vetted by @90-ghost here 🔍Vetted by association in this post

@90-ghost @heritageposts @gazavetters @neechees @butchniqabi @fluoresensitive @khanger @autisticmudkip @beserkerjewel @furiousfinnstan @xinakwans @batekush @appsa @nerdyqueerr @butchsunsetshimmer @biconicfinn @stopmotionguy @willgrahamscock @strangeauthor @bryoria @shesnake @legallybrunettedotcom @lautakwah @sovietunion @evillesbianvillain @antibioware @akajustmerry @dizzymoods @ree-duh @neptunerings @explosionshark @dlxxv-vetted-donations @vague-humanoid @buttercuparry @sayruq @malcriada @sar-soor @northgazaupdates2 @feluka @dirhwangdaseul @jdon @ibtisams @sawasawako @memingursa @schoolhater @toesuckingoctober @waskuyecaozu @a-shade-of-blue @c-u-c-koo-4-40k

[i-am-sleepyzz]

To humanity and mercy

Save my family in Gaza

✅️Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #250 )✅️