hypnophiliac
the science of seduction
14K posts
emma 17 welcome to my crib
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
hypnophiliac · 5 years ago
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hypnophiliac · 5 years ago
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Presented by myself and @goodluckdetective without comment
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hypnophiliac · 5 years ago
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Presented by myself and @goodluckdetective without comment
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hypnophiliac · 5 years ago
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hi wlecome to olive garden would you like olive or garden
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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Icarly was fucking terrifying
Sam knocked out a female heavy weight wrestler in one move, after directly asking her “Hey I’m pissed wanna throw down” and getting consent. She was 100% prepared for combat at that moment.
Freddy Hacked into a military computer, made a youtube video that could permanently damage your eyes, and also turned a toy gun into a functional laser gun.
Spencer had the gift of pyrokinesis which went off at random and this was treated as only a medium inconvenience.
Carly was able to manipulate all 3 of these people, one of them being her legal guardian. Sam and Freddy were said to be able to argue indefinitely, Sam even getting into a fight with her mom for so long the therapist who forced them into conversation nearly went insane.
Yet Carly could just say “Hey guys shut up” and they would stop talking right away.
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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my body, tearfully: when sleep???
me: my dude we just woke up!! It’s time for wakefulness and doing things and Productivity
my body, weeping: but???? when sleep?????
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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me: hey art student: *breaks multiple eggs onto their naked body and start crawling on the floor* me: okay!
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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Only at a Walmart via Shitty_Car_Mods
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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u can tell who the ancients of tumblr are bc they’re the ones not posting anything abt where to find them if this site collapses…we know this site isnt going anywhere….the apocalypse couldnt stop this garbage…..it has the cybernetic code of a cockroach
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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On some real shit, I do not fuck with people who ride those boat things at the carnival. People who get on those do not give a fuck about life, they don’t care about you, ya mama or your kids. They literally have nothing to lose. You don’t care about life so there’s no need for me to fight you because you’re not going to give a damn about my face. 
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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everytime I hear about children of the corn I think about the guy I met at comic con who actually lived in the town they filmed that movie at, and on the farm where they filmed in the corn. he was a teenager at the time and him and his friends would get drunk on moonshine and rustle the corn and let the air out of the tires of the production team’s trailers and shit. and now there’s Wikipedia pages about how the children of the corn set was haunted and they thought they angered god but it was really just drunk hillbillies
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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very tiny animals fill me w both love & anxiety
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hypnophiliac · 6 years ago
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