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[humanitiesnb]

GLASS HALF EMPTY MANIFESTO

Would you consider the glass of water above to be half empty or half full? To solidify your answer, let’s play a short game. I want you to visualize an open field. What’s the field’s condition? Is the field dry? Is it lush? How big is the field? Is the field filled with something like grass? Is the grass well-trimmed? Is the grass dead? As you wander aimlessly around your field, you take note of the weather. What’s the weather like? Is it raining? Is there a storm coming? Is it sunny? Windy? Foggy? Your answers to these three scenarios speak volumes about your outlook on life. Are you more of an optimist? That is, you see the glass half full, your field is overflowing with coruscating flowers, and the weather is sunlit and radiant. Or, are you more of a pessimist? In other words, you perceive the glass as half empty, your field is barren and lifeless, and there’s an upcoming deluge. For me, I’m undoubtedly a gloom-ridden person. This characteristic is exposed through three of my pieces of work. In module two—titled abstract images—I chose to peruse Rufino Tamayo's Children's Games. Despite being doused in a fiery red color, the painting's subject matter—children amusing themselves—is innocent and should have unveiled feelings of childlike jubilation and nostalgia. Instead of thinking about the positive perceptions that Children's Games brought out, I immediately thought about my fear of growing old and developing dementia. Likewise in the poetic license assignment, I chose a poem that illustrates a dangerous but all too common viewpoint that men have of women. I could have very well selected a heartfelt poem like Lullaby by Langston Hughes or an encouraging one like Mother to Son also by Langston Hughes. But again, I picked a poem that fixated on the cynical perceptions one gender has of the other. Lastly, the piece I chose to analyze in the not seen on TV module was a piece that mocked human intelligence and highlighted human depravity. In all three of these assignments, I had plenty of opportunities to either choose a buoyant piece of work or discuss the euphoric feelings and thoughts that the piece gave me. However, my line of thinking and subsequently my writing was constantly somber and critical. It seems like there wasn't a jolly bone in my body. 

The American Psychological Association defines pessimism as “the attitude that things will go wrong and that people’s wishes or aims are unlikely to be fulfilled" (American Psychological Association, n.d.). Based on this definition, pessimists loathe being placed in joyous situations where there’s an increased probability of things going awry. Marriage, having children, traveling, meeting new people, forming new friendships, impressing higher-ups, getting a promotion, and trying new foods are all a couple of situations that pessimists want to steer clear from. However, maintaining a relationship like one does in marriage and putting yourself out there through traveling are two circumstances that have an immense likelihood of bringing needless suffering. In the age of hook-up culture, people are reluctant and at times even afraid of commitment. This lack of devotion and dedication—amongst other factors—bleeds into marriages. Of course, the idea of finding your soulmate and living happily ever after is enticing and lovely but it’s just not realistic for the majority of the world’s population. An individual has to spend a significant amount of time, energy, money, and effort on producing and maintaining a healthy marriage. Unfortunately, the bulk of people either aren't willing to surrender or don’t even possess these four fruitages of marriage. If the majority are antipathetic about preserving a relationship and if more than 50% of U.S. marriages fail, then why would a pessimist want to be placed in this type of high-risk but low-reward gambling situation? In less than a millisecond, a seemingly happy marriage could crumble. Traveling poses another set of unwanted problems. Tourist destinations such as Paris, Cancun, Miami, and Bali are ripe with scammers and thieves. It’s extremely simple for a local to pickpocket a tourist in a crowded area because the tourist is either ill-prepared (for example, wearing a backpack instead of a money belt) or is distracted. Moreover, if one isn’t careful, one might be subjected to being swindled. Con tricks like taxi drivers claiming the meter is broken, vendors inflating prices, or phony police officers issuing fines are all scams geared towards extorting oblivious tourists. As evident by the Brittney Griner case in Russia and the Otto Warmbier case in North Korea, a small misstep or a lapse of judgment in a foreign country (especially a country whose government abhors America) could cost an individual their freedom and their life.

Clearly, being a prophet of doom and gloom is advantageous. When an individual catastrophizes a plan or situation, it forces them to become prepared for the possible outcome. This preparedness may come in the form of developing an action plan. For instance, before going on a trip or getting into a relationship (God forbid!), a pessimist might create a detailed list of all the feasible things that could go amiss. They can then attempt to mitigate the possibility of the worst-case scenarios coming to fruition by taking steps to prevent them from happening, or they could imagine what they would do or say in those mishaps. For example, signing a prenup as a safety measure if your marriage ends up dissolving (prevention) or being calm if robbed at knife-point in Athens (action). The key, though, is to set low expectations and then brainstorm ways for how everything could go wrong. It might be tedious or even exhausting but if those scenarios become reality, you'll thank the heavens that you had and acted on your foresight.

WORK CITATION:

American Psychological Association. (n.d.). Apa Dictionary of Psychology. American Psychological Association. Retrieved July 29, 2022, from https://dictionary.apa.org/pessimism

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EKPHRASIS

Along 7th Avenue

My family makes 

Lots of candy and

Pineapple upside down cakes! 

When it's warm and sunny

Lots of people flock

To our yellow bakery

Store right down the block 

Along 7th Avenue 

I always hear 

The sounds of people 

Laughing, filling my ear 

The time was 19:29 when the laughter stopped

And my family had to close down our shop

Along 7th Avenue my mother and I strolled

Placid and unmoving was the street like it lost its soul

The only building kept alive

Was that new big factory looming on avenue 25. 

_____________________________________________________

I chose Early Sunday Morning by Edward Hopper as my ekphrasis. When I first saw Hopper’s painting, I reverted back to a child again. The dramatic yet restrained complementary colors of the rusty red and sea moss green brought me back to a place in my life where I was carefree and content. I’m not sure if this was intentional on Hopper’s part but the red—along with the sprinkles of citric yellow and baby blue—being on top of the green is reminiscent of a garden oasis. Perhaps this accidental color placement is what evokes a sense of youthful vigor and blissful ignorance. Nonetheless, the partial atmosphere of playfulness is what inspired me to write the first half of my poem from the point of view of a naive child. I tried to refrain from using complex vocabulary and instead chose to use easy words to capture the lexicon of a kid. The first two stanzas are short and erratic which are characteristics of how little children lack articulation. When you have a conversation with a child, they often get so excited that they tend to jumble up and stumble on their words. I sometimes find myself on the edge of my seat whenever I talk with my baby brother. He takes eons to formulate a sentence and get his point across that I just want to blurt out the words that he’s looking for and be done with the discussion. I incorporated this feeling of exasperation into my poem as evident by the incomplete and fragmented lines in lines 1-12. Since the painting’s subject matter is the Great Depression, I integrated that through the sudden speech change in the poem's last half. According to a 1933 article titled “The Shift in Child Labor”, Beatrice McConnell states that “children are leaving school and going to work…many of these children are acting as the sole support of their families…” There's no doubt that once the Great Depression hit, myriads of kids had to mature quickly and essentially become miniature adults. In my poem, I indicated the significant effect the Great Depression had on children in the final two stanzas—they’re considerably longer, more intricate, and a little bit more grammatically correct than the first two.

At a first glance, the painting is amiable. However, the longer you observe it, the more unnatural it becomes. There are flakes of faint shadows to the right of the canvas that is discernible if you inspect closely. Not a single living thing—whether it be a person or an animal—is depicted in Early Sunday Morning. Not even movement such as a tumbleweed rolling or wind blowing is shown. This is peculiar because there are indications in the painting that life did exist (for example, the various bodegas and the curtains decorating the apartments). The viewer is left to wonder what happened to make a seemingly dynamic place become so desolate. The absence of life and the presence of silence creates an eerie ambiance. I wanted to capture the transformation of the once vivacious avenue into the now vacant street. I did this by using positive connotative words in the first half (like candy, cake, flock, and laughing) and negative connotative words in the second (such as stopped, close, unmoving, lost, and looming). To add to the impending doom atmosphere, I decided to end the poem by having the adolescent notice a nearby factory. I imagine that most local businesses couldn’t continue to operate during the Great Depression while factories could. Even after the depression ended, the overwhelming majority of small companies still couldn’t recover and were eventually replaced by big corporations. I believe that Hopper was trying to allude to this by drawing in tall shadows on the ground and by placing a colossal dark building behind the shops.

I remember reading somewhere that Hopper initially wanted to paint a figure of someone in one of the windows. He decided not to do it since the omission of life brought to the viewers stronger conflicting feelings—to be weary and sorrowful or tranquil and genial? I wanted to convey this decision in my poem. So, I decided to focus more on inanimate objects (such as the shop, the factory, and 7th avenue) than on living ones. Interestingly, Hopper mentioned how the painting's original title did not include the word Sunday; somebody inserted that word afterward. In respecting Hopper's initial title, I made no mention of any particular day of the week. I instead made it so that the events could occur on any singular day by using these phrases: when it's warm and sunny and the time was.

One crucial feature of the canvas lies in the way Hopper plays with the sunlight's effect (the sun rising makes the painting bright) and the dusk's effect (the way items are located such as the fire-hydrant create silhouettes). I attempted to duplicate and expand on this by including the sun and its attributes and the darkness and its traits in my poem. For instance, I wrote that when it's sunny and warm that's when people come to the yellow bakery store. People associate the sun with the color yellow and the warmth that it brings. I further elaborated on this "warmth" by describing a common action that fills people with comfort—laughter. I likened darkness to the street losing its soul as well as incorporated the verb, looming, to personify the shadows as an ominous threat lurking around the corner.

Works Cited:

McConnell, B. (1933, May). The shift in child labor. The Survey, 69(5), 187. Retrieved [27 July 2022] from /?p=11098.

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NOT SEEN ON TV

I’ve chosen "Jacko Homo" by Devo to discuss and analyze. The music video first starts out with a car pulling up to some sort of drive-in theater. In an enormous font, the “film” still (in actuality is a mural) has the words “Shine on America” placed in the center. To the right is a hand holding a torch and surrounding the torch are lines and colors which together are strangely similar to Japan’s rising sun flag. Suddenly on the left side, a person wearing a baby-faced mask along with an orange jumpsuit, erratically scampers across the “movie” and through the cars to enter an upstairs location. The next segment shows the U.S. commander-in-chief sitting dead center in this room. Portraits of former presidents hang on both sides of him but oddly, an image of an authoritative Pierrot (I’m assuming) is suspended above him. When the infant man enters the area, the chief inquires if he has the “papers that the China man” gave him. As soon as the adult baby hands the documents over, the chief breaks the fourth wall and says—while looking directly at the viewer— that the world will soon learn about de-evolution. In the succeeding scene, the "head physician" starts to lambaste and somewhat mock humans while the rest of the medical board (dressed in ridiculous surgical attire) is attentively listening to him. Each time the chief-in-medicine sings the question "are we not men?", three males wearing stockings on their heads exclaim "we are devo!" When the bridge commences, the physician-in-chief seemingly gets struck by a realization and begins to hide his head in shame while dancing disjointedly. The camera then shows a group of medical students—who are also dressed in the same absurd clothing—mindlessly and manically dancing in their chairs in unison. The three stocking men are seen frantically squirming in yellow latex bags on top of a table while the students are dancing and prodding at them.

Devo’s "Jocko Homo" is centered around human depravity, idiocy, and hypocrisy. A particular detail that caught my eye was at the beginning of the video. It's a detail that I've briefly mentioned—the rising flag-like mural. For Japan, the rising sun embodies national pride and represents good fortune. For their neighboring countries, however, it's a symbol of militarism and serves as a reminder of the atrocities faced by Japanese imperialism. The combined use of the mantra "shine on America" and the rising sun graphic blaringly highlights how innately egocentric and insensitive humans are. It doesn't matter if a certain action, word, or item is offensive to a person(s)—it's not derogatory to me. I won't develop insomnia if I purloin, exploit, and exhaust something/somebody. I'm going to keep doing me and if people get hurt along the way then they shouldn't have been in the way. If what I'm doing works—even if it’s to the detriment of others—then so be it. After all, it's the survival of the fittest. There’s a contradictory concept that the adult baby personifies. Babies symbolize new beginnings, purity, and most notably the future. Grown-ups, on the other hand, signify the end, improbity, and finally the present. The subsequent amalgamation of these two opposing portrayals illustrates the decline of human intelligence and reasoning. At first, humans had immeasurable aspirations and contained a finite amount of drive. They thought of and created staggering pieces of work whether artistic or analytic. But over time, they mentally regress into lowly creatures who are guided not by logic but by animalistic instincts. We can see evidence of this cognitive deceleration in history and in current affairs—wars, famine, crime, global warming, animal extinction, etc are all due to human incompetence. Even though we’re physically mature, our brains are acutely juvenile. Another peculiar detail that I noticed is the placement of the infant adult in relation to the mural. Instead of the man-child going up to the wall, he emerges from behind it. With this subtle positioning, Devo is telling the viewers that the degenerate actions that humans do shouldn’t come as a shock—they lack the mental complexity to know and do better just like babies and animals. The rest of the video with the medical personnel and the three latex men reaffirms how dimwitted and opportunistic humans have become. Out of the whole scene, only one individual is wearing a suit—the chief physician. Multiple studies have shown that the way people dress affects how they’re viewed and treated by others. In particular, a suit is indicative of success and power. Thus, people tend to blindly follow and listen to a person wearing formal attire. This glorification is depicted with the board and the med students clinging to every word and action that the chief of medicine says and does. Devo deliberately choosing the medical field to star in this video isn’t by mistake. If I were, to sum up, the whole premise of this clip in one word it would be devolution. The concept of evolution originated from the scientific field but more specifically biology. The only science-based career that deals with biology and humans are physicians. Out of all the professions, humans are more likely to trust and believe doctors. By doing this, they develop into brain-dead people that are incapable of having a healthy skepticism and are more susceptible to being taken advantage of. This exploitation is portrayed through the three masked men being restrained and the students virtually assaulting them.

In order to thoroughly understand the video, your eyes and ears have to be in tune with each other. If you were to play this in the background while you do something else, you would completely miss the point that Devo is trying to get across. Visualization allows a person to form a clear understanding and interpretation of an idea or a situation. It's an avenue for artists to communicate their art's purpose without the use of words. This type of visual art amplifies the lyrics, and in my opinion, is more impactful than the verses. I reckon if you take away the lyrics but keep the video, you would still comprehend the overarching theme. However, if you solely focus on the words then it would be extremely difficult to decipher the message. To illustrate, if someone were to describe The Garden of Earthly Delights to you, they wouldn't be able to mention all the minute details in that painting. Therefore, you would get pretty confused about what exactly the painting is of or is about. If you yourself see the painting, though, you're able to grasp and appreciate the artwork tenfold. Albeit not as important as sight, the clashing and robotic sound let the audience know that the video (and its message) deals with a dystopian world.

This piece simultaneously expands and challenges the know-how of television. When watching TV, our sense of sight and hearing have to work in unison for us to understand what's happening. Likewise, Devo's "Jacko Homo" utilizes the same two senses to paint a picture to the viewer. The majority of television shows don't require brain power, concentration, or a rewatch in order to comprehend them. This isn't the case for "Jacko Homo" however. This form of art demands the user to put to use their cognitive skills to dissect, analyze, and ultimately come to an understanding of the piece.

[humanitiesnb]

ANATOMY OF A SCENE

I chose the movie BlacKkKlansman as my comedic synopsis. The movie starts by introducing the audience to the main character—Ron Stallworth—becoming the first black police officer in Colorado Springs. Transferring from the filing department to an undercover cop, Stallworth is tasked with infiltrating a Black Panther rally. In the 20:15 and 21:10 mark, Spike Lee skillfully utilizes a cross-cut in adding a comedic effect to the two scenes. When Kwame Ture vehemently rebukes the police force (even going as far as calling them racist pigs), the scene cuts outside to Flip Zimmerman and Jimmy Creek—two white police officers—listening in. There’s a little bit of a juxtaposition in the 24:00 marking. While the police officers are assaulting four unarmed black panther members, the pacific music from the scene before is still playing in the background. This use of an L-shot might suggest how ingrained racism is in the United States. Under the shimmering guise of America being “progressive”, lies a decaying ineradicable belief—racism. Even though black people aren’t slaves anymore and have “rights” like their white counterparts, they still face various forms of racism today such as micro-aggressions and negative stereotypes. 

Stallworth soon gets put onto the intelligence task force. There he poses as a white man interested in joining the KKK on the telephone. Unfortunately, since Stallworth gave out his real name, he has to enlist the help of a white police officer—Zimmerman—into infiltrating the Klu Klux Klan. Posing as Ron, Zimmerman meets three KKK members— Ivanhoe, Felix, and Walter. Although Ivanhoe and Walter are unsuspecting of Zimmerman, Felix is skeptical of him and correctly guesses that Zimmerman is an undercover cop and a Jew. In the 47:11 mark, Lee once again sparkles a dash of irony when he goes from Stallworth saying “power to the people” right to him impersonating a bigoted white man in the next scene. The ghoulish comedic element is further added in the 48:35 scene. Sergeant Trapp is telling Stallworth how a person who has values and beliefs like David Duke might become president of the United States. As soon as those words leave Trapp’s mouth, the soundtrack suddenly stops and the characters are still. This abrupt moment of silence jars the viewer and forces them to confront reality—a country who's supposed to embody liberty and justice for all did elect a David Duke like president. 

Felix’s assumptions about Zimmerman almost get confirmed when he holds the latter at gun-point. Felix forces Zimmerman to take a lie detector test to see if he’s really a Jew. Before Zimmerman’s cover is blown, Stallworth—who was listening in—creates a distraction. An example of Lee employing a J-cut happens around the 01:00:06 mark—Stallworth telling Zimmerman and Creek that the police department’s failure to fire racist Andy Landers because of “brotherhood” reminds him of another group. This strategy generates anticipation in the viewers (the viewers are wondering what’s going to come next) and adds another dash of the grim comedic aspect. Ever the cynic, Felix (along with Ivanhoe and Walter) confronts Zimmerman about a black man living at his address and using his name. Zimmerman successfully manages to talk his way out of a possibly deadly confrontation and dissipates Ivanhoe and Walter’s distrust. During a KKK night meeting, Walter informs the group that he’s stepping down as the leader and nominates Zimmerman to take on the role. The viewer gets so engrossed with what’s going on that the immediate cross-cut to Stallworth in the car (01:17:50) catches them off guard. The use of cross-cutting also creates a comical effect in the 01:18:28 marking; Duke proudly proclaims that he knows when he’s speaking to a negro over the phone is hysterical because he doesn’t realize that he is actually speaking to a black man. In a turn of events, Stallworth is taken off the case and is assigned as a security personnel for David Duke when he comes to Colorado Springs. Around the 01:33:08 mark, Lee uses a low angle shot to emphasize the satire in the situation. Stallworth—a black man—is surrounded by two KKK members. Behind them, there’s a stained glass artwork of Jesus (I assume). A man who said to “love your neighbor as yourself” is in the same vicinity of two KKK members (who are supposedly christians) who embody the definition of hatred.

During the Klan meeting, Zimmerman is finally initiated as a member. However, his cover is blown once Walker (the bomb maker) recognizes him as a police officer. Walker notifies Felix of this revelation and for the first time we see Lee use a point-of-view shot as Felix’s eyes go from Zimmerman (who’s talking to Walter and Duke) to Ron Stallworth (who’s standing guard). This action highlights Felix’s train of thought and eventual realization—Ron Stallworth was a black man all along. Connie (Felix’s wife) leaves the gathering to drive to Patrice Dumas’s house. Once at the house, Connie leaves the bomb underneath Dumas’s car and begins to flee the scene but is stopped by Stallworth. An altercation ensues. Two white police officers drive up to Stallworth tackling Connie. Instead of investigating the situation, the white cops start to beat Stallworth. Felix, Walker, and Ivanhoe pull up next to Dumas’s car and in a flash the bomb goes off, killing them in the process. In the end, the task force is dismantled due to budget cuts and the chief orders Stallworth to destroy any records of the investigation. The next scene shows footages of a white supremacist rally held in 2017, then President Donald Trump response to the rally, and David Duke speaking at the rally. The movie ends with the American flag turning black. 

—----------------------------------------------------------------------

The second movie I chose in the drama category is Ex Machina. The movie commences with a 26-year-old programmer—Caleb Smith—winning a contest to spend a week with the company’s reclusive CEO. Once Caleb arrives at Nathan’s estate (the CEO), Nathan tells him that he can be part of a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity if he so chooses. Caleb agrees and begins to participate in an experiment called the Turing test with an artificial robot called Ava. The goal of this test? To see if Ava is capable of thoughtful and emotional consciousness. During the second testing session, the power cuts off and we immediately see Ava’s demeanor shift. As the camera is tilting to capture Ava’s grave expression, she warns Caleb not to trust Nathan. The use of this specific camera movement creates an inferiority complex in the viewers. Prior to the power going out, everything was set up so that the viewers felt a false sense of control and safety. The lightning was bright and jovial, the background music was mellow and airy, and Nathan seemed like a cocky but cordial person. However, that security blanket was swiftly seized as soon as the blackout happened. The viewers are now left questioning Nathan’s true intentions. Throughout the next sessions, Caleb falls in love with Ava and seemingly Ava develops a crush on Caleb.

While talking with Nathan, Caleb discovers that he’s planning to upgrade Ava’s system thereby obliterating her memories. Caleb, not wanting his lover to be dismantled, gets Nathan severely intoxicated in order to steal his access card. Once Caleb gets this card, he uses it to grant him access to Nathan’s room and computer. In there, Caleb unearths a startling secret—Nathan has built and abused several AI robots. In the following scene (01:13:09) we see Alex Garland using a fisheye lens effect to mimic a surveillance camera. Let’s further anatomize this scene. Through the fisheye lens, a full shot is established. The full shot captures the stark contrast in body language between Nathan and Caleb. Nathan is laying on the floor. Caleb is standing up. Nathan’s posture is slumped and detached. Caleb’s posture is upright and resolute. The conflicting lightning on the opposite sides of the scene conveys the attitudes of the two men. A dazzling practical light is emitting from the elevator on Caleb’s side while Nathan’s side is saturated in darkness. The once bashful and awkward Caleb has transfigured into an authoritative man. For Nathan, however, his lightning doesn’t represent change. Throughout the course of the movie, we witness Nathan drowning his forlornness in alcohol. Unlike Ava and Caleb who at this point have redeemable qualities, Nathan has none—he physically and sexually abuses his AI creations. Thus, Nathan’s lack of lightning could represent his lack of morals and/or his sociopathic tendencies. Interestingly, the use of shadows on Nathan’s side and the subtle use of rim lighting on Caleb’s side reminds me of a hero (Caleb) defeating a villain (Nathan). Garland also chose to employ a high-angle shot in this scene. This camera shot further plays up the shift of power imbalance between Caleb and Nathan—Caleb doesn’t idolize Nathan anymore and in fact, Caleb abhors him.

Caleb’s plan of getting Nathan drunk and escaping with Ava backfires when Nathan refuses to drink. Instead, Nathan reveals to Caleb Ava’s true test—to see if she could successfully manipulate a human for her own self-interest. An unexpected twist occurs when Caleb reveals to Nathan that his plan of coding the house system to open all the doors was already done last night. By Caleb doing this, it enabled Ava to escape her confinement and kill Nathan with the help of Kyoko. The movie ends with Ava confining Caleb in a room and leaving him to go out in the real world.

[humanitiesnb]

PHOTOGRAPHER'S EYE

The theme for my photo collection is "insanity". In the quest for perfection, I've done some things that other people might consider foolish. Looking back at my past (and current) actions, I realize that I was so consumed with flawlessness that I neglected my health and damaged my relationships. I believe that no matter who you are, absolutely anybody can fall victim to the obsessive nature of the need for perfection. When we talk about mental illness we never include perfectionism and how it can severely alter one's mental, emotional, and physical health.

COUNTDOWN

I took a picture of the weight scale that I have in my bedroom. No matter where I am or what time of day it is, I always have to weigh myself. My weight has always been the focal point of my obsession and even more so when I purchased this scale. When I first wake up, I weigh myself. After I eat and drink, I weigh myself. After I go to the bathroom, I weigh myself. If I know that I'm going to be out of the house for a long duration then I take my scale with me. After I exercise, I weigh myself. Before I go to sleep, I weigh myself. Every minute of my day has been primarily spent weighing myself. I refuse to let hours go by without stepping onto my measuring device. This behavior of constantly doing weigh-ins has distorted my view of food and has disrupted my sleeping habits. For example, during my night weigh-ins, if I see that I didn't return to the weight I originally was in the morning then I would set an alarm clock so that I can wake up and weigh myself. Instead of the scale serving me, I know that I'm a servant to it. To me, the scale is the only indication that I'm on the right track to a healthy lifestyle. I realize that to some people this may seem excessive but honestly, I'm apathetic to their concerns. I feel a sense of euphoria each time I see that I lose a pound or two.

MIRROR MIRROR ON THE WALL

This photo is of a full-length mirror I have in my room. Before leaving the house, it's normal for an individual to check the mirror to see if anything on their body is out of place. This isn't the case for me. Just like with my weight scale, I constantly check my appearance in the mirror. It has gotten to the point where I would be in my bed and suddenly get this urge to analyze myself in the mirror. I certainly don't do this because I'm a narcissist but because I enjoy scrutinizing myself. Inspecting and picking apart my flaws through the mirror allows me to quickly see what specific areas of my body I need to tinker with. This mirror obsession fits in with my central theme of insanity because of how frequently and how long I look at myself. Any sane person would spend only a couple of minutes (possibly every other day) checking themselves. For myself, I spend practically every waking moment for hours on end just dissecting and criticizing my appearance through the mirror. 

GETTING READY FOR BED

This is a picture of all the products and devices I use in my nighttime routine. Because I'm extremely diligent in taking care of every aspect of my body, it takes me five hours in the bathroom to get ready for bed. There have been days when I didn't want to do my routine but the thought of crawling into bed with the day's dirt on me is just repulsive. I have a specific routine in the shower and out of the shower that I can't deviate from. For instance, taking a shower is the first step in my nighttime routine. While showering, I always have to execute these actions in this particular order: lather and scrub, apply body oil, exfoliate, apply body mousse, and finally apply body conditioner. After exiting the shower, I move on to my body care. This part of the process takes a quarter of my time since I utilize a plethora of body products. For my whole body (making sure that I don't miss any crevices), I have to apply these products in order: toner, lotion, butter, oil, Vaseline, and lastly powder. Since I spend the bulk of my time on them, I reckon one can say that my teeth and my face are my most essential regions. I take pride in having a ravishing smile and a blemished-free visage. However, in order to maintain what I have, there's a need to spend copious amounts of time, energy, and money. I've received criticism from my parents, siblings, and my friends for my "ridiculous" and intricate routine. I pay them no mind because my routine lends me the opportunity to de-stress. 

A WATER A DAY KEEPS THE DOCTOR AWAY

This photo features my water bottle that goes everywhere with me. For an average person, water is the quintessential basis of life. In fact, a human can only survive up to 3 days without water. Despite the benefits, H2O has always been my source of suffering. In the hopes of slimming down, it was customary for me to do a water fasting diet. Water fasting is a type of fast in which a person can only consume water. The recommended duration that one should water fast should be 24 to 72 hours long. Anything longer could cause severe side effects such as overeating, constipation, and/or migraines. However, as with everything in life, I took water fasting to the extreme. For the first seven days of every month, I used to completely abstain from food and only ingested water. Considering that food supplies energy, there have been numerous times when I would be unable to think, make sound decisions, faint, and/or become exceedingly lethargic because of a lack of energy. A sensible person would listen to their body and surrender. However, I was so blinded by the lure of being thin that I disregarded all warning signs and continued to put my health at risk.

THE CITY THAT NEVER SLEEPS

This picture is from 2020 when my family and I took a road trip from Florida to New York without stopping at any rest areas. Out of all the images, this may seem like the one that's most out of place but to me, this shot encompasses "insanity". Originally, each member of my family was going to take turns behind the wheel. My father would be the first to drive and then it would go to me, my brother, my mother, my cousin, and then finally my uncle. When I took over the driver's seat, instead of driving for only six hours and then transferring the wheel to the next person, I drove the rest of the way there. Even when night fell and I felt sleep overcoming me, I still drove. Even when my arms started to ache, I continued driving. I hadn't slept for about two days and thought it was a fantastic idea to get behind the wheel—sleep-deprived and all— for approximately 14 hours. Unfortunately, this was also the time when I was doing my water fasting. Driving while being drowsy, light-headed, and famished was an extremely foolish thing to do on my part.

There's nothing wrong with being the best version of yourself. The problem lies, however, with developing an unhealthy view of perfection to the point where it drives you insane and takes over your life. I've acknowledged that it's OK to have setbacks so long as you get back up and try again. It's not about how fast you can achieve your goals instead it's about being persistent and taking things one step at a time. Even though I have destructive habits that I still need to fix, it amazes me how far I've come.

[humanitiesnb]

MUSICAL THEME

The name of the theme that I chose is sin city. When I see the word sin, I automatically think of the Edenic account and its cautionary lesson. The genesis of sin began with Adam and Eve’s willful disobedience and subsequent rebellion against God. The defiant inclination of their heart to do what’s forbidden eclipsed their discernment. As a result, the long-term goal of living in an earthly paradise vanished. Growing up as a Jehovah’s Witness in a non-religious world, it was challenging to retain and uphold biblical standards. I often wanted to revolt against these ideals and participate in every action deemed bad. If my heart yearned for them, if everybody was taking part in them, and if they looked like fun—how bad were they really? 

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ROCK:

In Romans 12:11, the bible states to “be industrious, not lazy…” "Chelsea" by Dragged Under demonstrates just how easy it is to fall into the trap of being indolent. If a lethargic individual is surrounded by enablers then they will never correct their way of thinking or attitude. They do realize that their lack of accountability only impairs them in the long run but if other people aren't complaining then why should they change? Likewise, if a person is placed into an environment that breeds slothful creatures, they will transform into sluggish beings. I should mention that there's a significant disconnect between the lyrics and the fast-paced structure of "Chelsea". The first time listening to this song, one might be preoccupied with the energetic vocals, the fast tempo (155 BPM), and the drums blaring a back beat on beats 2 and 4 to take notice of the blasé lyrics. This approach reaffirms the idea that it's facile to plummet into a stagnant behavior and stay that way if one's surroundings can mask everything with faux glitter. Characteristic of rock, the melody is simultaneously flamboyant and lyrical. To capture the ambiance in this song, you can’t just say the lyrics, you have to SCREAM them. Since rock is derived from blues music, it’s no surprise that there’s a call-and-response portion in "Chelsea". Around the 2:11 mark, the vocals build anticipation and in response, the guitar creates a resolution. The unifying sounds of the string instruments and the drums produce a persistent and strangely lovely consonance. 

RAP:

Luke 12:15 admonishes to "keep your eyes open and guard against every sort of greed…" In J. Cole's "ATM", he narrates the fatal allure of covetousness. To me, greed can lead a person down a lifestyle of sin. After all, it's the transgression that drove Satan to rebel against his creator. J. Cole employs a skittish rhythmic pattern in "ATM" to build a sense of urgency in his listeners. Let's briefly deconstruct the rhyme scheme in the first half of the first verse as an example.   

At first, the listener is somewhat lackadaisical (represented by the bold red letters which J. Cole de-emphasizes when rapping). They maybe aren't suspecting anything exhilarating to happen. However, as soon as J. Cole strikes the fourth beat on the three-syllable ending words (indicated by the underlined blue letters), they are jolted awake. This repeated tactic of decompressing and then stressing generates anxiety. When a person is materialistic or avaricious, they have undue stress—is today the day they're going to lose everything? Can they really trust their family and friends? What can they do to ensure that they'll stay on top? "ATM" falls into the andante (at normal walking pace) tempo marking (82 BPM). This is fascinating because one would expect that such a high-tension song would have a quicker tempo. To me, this means everyone has some degree of selfishness in them. However, just because this is the standard doesn't make it less immoral. 

SOUL:

According to 1 Thessalonians 4:3, God wants his creations to "abstain from sexual immorality." With subtleness, "Red Rover" details the fervid appetite a man has for his lover. Each verse begins in a mezzo-forte dynamic. However, as the song progresses and reaches the chorus, there's a crescendo and then a decrescendo. This is indicative of what lust is. At first, you take a strong sexual liking towards a person. In turn, this "puppy love" might convert into a deep infatuation. Once your sexual urges have been gratified though, that "love" dissipates. When a person personifies lust, they usually envision an erotic man or a sultry woman. The singer's impassioned yet knowing vocals combined with the mellow bass guitar produces a sleek and suave tone. This specific tone of the song portrays such a sexual being. Underneath the repeated notes and rhythms of the bass line, there's a faint change in the singer's volume during the last pre-chorus. Instead of singing it confidently and loudly as if he was proclaiming his "love" to the world, he instead switches over to a softer and somewhat brooding sound. It seems to me that the man is getting tired of engaging in counterfeit love and by the end is pleading for this moissanite affair to be turned into a diamond union. 

ELECTRONIC:

The biblical warning found in 1 Peter 4:3 makes clear that Christians should not indulge in "…overdrinking, wild parties, drinking bouts…" Interestingly, all these prohibited brazen conducts are commonly done and associated with raves. To give background, a rave is an underground electronic dance party that presents the opportunity for young adults to get severely intoxicated. "Heads Will Roll" perfectly encapsulates rave culture specifically with the line "dance till you're dead". As typically with EDM, this song has a tempo of 132 BPM. This BPM falls into the tempo marking of allegro (fast, quickly, brightly). I would imagine if this musical piece were to take a much slower cadence, it would severely ruin the dancing atmosphere that it's trying to create. Unlike with the other playlist songs that had some sort of variations (whether that be melody, rhythm, or tone) to them, this piece is repetitive. To others, this would seem like an unfavorable trait, but in rave culture, repetition is highly favorable. Raving embodies the concept of self-indulging and losing one's self. Thus, when you attend a rave you don't want to think about if the music is going to change in flow, tune, or pattern. You don't want to anticipate or contemplate. You're simply here to dance. Moreover, this repetition engulfs the listener into a hypnotic trance. This is the state of mind you want to be in when you rave—you have to dissociate in order to enjoy.

CLASSICAL:

Although the Bible doesn't mention drugs, it does provide instruction in 2 Corinthians 7:1 to "cleanse ourselves of every defilement of flesh and spirit." Despite not containing lyrics, "Marijuana, variations non serieuses, Op. 54" illustrates the experience of getting high through specific musical structures. At the very start of the piece, there's a high degree of dissonance most notably around the 00:30 mark. The inharmonious and grating sounds that are produced are symbolic of a psychedelic acid trip. Not only are one's visual and auditory senses distorted but there are bouts of euphoria (00:30) coupled with intense melancholy (04:00). Needless to say, there are myriads upon myriads of contrast within this composition. For example, at the 04:37 mark, the primary layer (the trumpet) is boisterous and somewhat melodic while the second layer (the piano) is muted and has a staccato rhythm. The disparity between the first and second layers are reflective of how people's bodies have different responses when smoking or inhaling cannabis. Some become paranoid and short-tempered (second layer) while others are in a blissful state of mind (primary layer).

[humanitiesnb]

PLOTTING

The quaint room seemed to douse everything in silence. The only noises that were barren were the wall clock's ticking and Tsegah's syncopated breaths. Tsegah was pacing around the room and to say that she was anxious would be severely underplaying her current state of mind (A). It was as if 666 demons had infected her body and were entertaining themselves with her organs. 333 of those evil spirit creatures were engaging in a cordial game of tennis with her brain. Was she sure she sent all the invitations out? Did she remember to download the playlist? This dress better not rip. The other 333 had claimed sanctuary in her heart and were now gearing up to participate in the Tour de Coeur. Why was her heart quivering so much? When did she start panting? In order for the demons to be expelled, an exorcism was required. That is, Tsegah's holy wedding day had to be unadulterated. Was it normal for brides to have such defeatist attitudes? She wasn't sure and didn’t have time to ponder about it for much longer when a gentle knock on the other side of the door disrupted her thoughts (X). Tsegah’s breathing quickened and she squeezed her engagement ring so tightly that her knuckles began to turn purple. She wasn’t expecting anyone…was she? 

“W-w-who is it?”

Instead of a response, the blush pink knob turned and a grinning face peered its head in. Her father? An uncontrolled smile started to gradually etch its way onto Tsegah's face (B). Her dad. Her shoulders slumped and the breath that she didn't know she had held in departed from her mouth. Daddy! In a fraction of a second, Tsegah ran into the embrace of her father's arms. The sheer force of her need for solace almost made her father topple over. The room erupted into a volcano of affection. The silence that once suffocated the area now dissipated and made way for wild laughter. Tucked under her father's chin, Tsegah's body was practically bouncing as words rapidly began to spill out of her mouth. Placing a tender kiss on top of her head, he tentatively listened to her ramblings. Although not saying a word, his angelic presence was all that Tsegah needed (RESOLUTION).

[humanitiesnb]

POETIC LICENSE

Langston Hughes's 50-50 was my choice poem. Without delving too deep, this poem was about a woman who's distraught that she hasn't found a lover. This woman is so utterly blinded by her heart's appetite that she quickly (I assume) surrenders her plate of self-worth.

In the first stanza, Hughes highlights the woman's forlornness through the use of consonants. For example, in line 1 there's a repetition of the l sound—I'm all alone in this world, she said. Likewise in line 3, the d sound is constant—ain't got nobody to hold my hand. By Hughes employing consonants, he stresses the fact that the woman is in severe anguish because she feels that she's all alone. Her feelings of alienation aren't due to the loss of community or connection but instead to not having a partner.

In the second stanza, somebody named Big Boy answers the woman's prayers. Big Boy explains that it's relatively simple for her to catch a man. All she needs to do is to strip away her convoluted emotions and thoughts and just think like men. If we go further down the poem, we see that the woman is suddenly enlivened and quickly responds with a desperate question—Babe, what must I do? Notice that this is the only line that stands alone. To me, this does two things. Throughout the poem, the tone has always been somber and despondent. However, line 12 shifts the mood completely to hopefulness. The reader goes from pitying the woman to getting ready to jump for joy—there's light at the end of the tunnel! Secondly, I believe that this line is foreshadowing. If we look back at the second stanza, Big Boy has a harsh tone when he speaks to the woman. Even though the reader wants the poem to finish with a cheerful ending, they know (based on Big Boy's lack of sympathy) that something opposite will happen.

In the last stanza, Big Boy reveals his true intentions. In a matter-of-fact tone, he states that she would need to give up her bed and money. What I find interesting is that Hughes incorporates symbolism to separate the readers into two categories. The first category would be optimistically foolish readers. These readers uncover the underlying meaning of bed and money—Big Boy wants the woman to surrender her sexual (bed) and financial (money) independence to him. The second category of readers would be the cynically wise. These ones uncover the implicit theme of the poem—love and prostitution are one and the same. In order to upkeep a relationship, there has to be intimacy. In order to "strengthen bonds" or "finally become one with each other", intimacy has to be there. In order to have a place to live and receive gifts (lavish or not), you have to engage in sexual activities. Love and marriage are gives and takes. There's no such thing as having an unselfish relationship.

I chose this poem because I'm irritated by the actions of women particularly when men are involved. When a man cheats there's a 95% chance that his wife/girlfriend takes him back. I always see posts on social media on how to keep your man from cheating. Or worse—how to be dainty and feminine to attract men. I find it appalling that the majority of women place men on such high pedestals. They treat these grown males like infants. They cook for them, do their laundry, massage their feet, at times bathe them, and all for what? A minute of pleasure? It's exhausting scrolling through social media and witnessing women get used and abused by men. 50-50 reinforces my belief that a significant number of men view relationships as a transaction. While women grow up fantasizing about their prince charming and dream family, men grow up believing that they're a king piece in a chess world. This difference comes into play in relationships. It's the woman who sacrifices the most in order to please and keep their man. I’ve witnessed wives/girlfriends bragging on social media about getting liposuction and/or a tummy tuck after giving birth. They go on to state how their husband/boyfriend adores their new body, how their men won't leave anytime soon, and how every woman should upkeep their figure immediately after pushing out a whole human. It seems like to me everything a woman does is for the male gaze. I'm fed up living in an environment where the only determining factor to date is what would I bring to the table (relationship) and how far will I go to lose myself to keep a man.

[humanitiesnb]

ARCHITECTURE FOR THE 21ST CENTURY

I'm not the type of person who likes straightforward and simple things. I adore activities that require a person to think outlandish ideas and do bizarre actions. Simply put, I much rather deviate from the status quo than stick to it. That's why I settled on a conceptual design as opposed to a vernacular one. To be frank, my inspiration for my sketch was based off of my cake storage container. While looking at it, the thought of people living in arched shaped houses started to become appealing to me.

According to a 2013 journal article titled "Too Much of a Good Thing: How Overpopulation, Overconsumption, and Failing Distributive Justice Programs are Imperiling Mankind", Michael Keenan states that "should current levels of resource strain persist, the resources most critical to mankind's survival might be completely exhausted by 2050" (Keenan, 2013, p. 67). For this reason, I decided to address the pressing issue of resource depletion caused by overpopulation. I'll first discuss why I specifically chose a geodesic dome-shaped house rather than an ordinary rectangular house to solve this problem. To start, geodesic domes lessen the dependency on energy. These domes have a polyhedron structure that allows sunlight to get refracted thus diminishing the need for artificial lighting. There have been countless scientific studies that show that an increased amount of surface area decreases the temperature. Seeing that geodesic domes have less surface area, they have the ability to retain heat for a long period of time. Thus for individuals who live in colder areas, there won’t be a need for them to purchase cooling systems. Keeping in line with being energy efficient, I decided to draw solar panels up at the very top. Since my dome has a relatively small volume-to-surface area ratio, two solar panels (which are more than enough to offset one’s electrical usage) would cost around $5,000. Whereas on a 2,000-square foot traditional shaped house, 20 solar panels (generally the amount needed to offset one’s electrical usage) could cost around $35,000. Since geodesic domes have less room, this forces people to live a simpler lifestyle. If people would stop buying items that aren't necessities, then the collapse of our ecosystem would decelerate. Additionally, because of a smaller living area, household size (and subsequently population size) would decrease.

As with all houses, windows are incorporated onto geodesic domes. Though, I should mention a significant privacy concern. Because domes are half a circle, windows can't be placed on the curved sides (unless you build an irregular shaped window) and can only be placed in flat areas. These locations are usually located way at the top which means that having curtains or blinds aren't feasible options. I still included windows in my sketch, however in order to combat this issue, I designed my windows to be two-way. My biggest problem was figuring out how to create a non-polluting sewage system. The solution? Using weeping willow trees. Instead of the wastewater going from the septic tank to our biome (as it usually would), it would instead be going directly to a garden of willow trees. These willow trees would then filter out the toxins and flow the clean water into another tank for the water to be reused. The primary reason why our natural resources are being exhausted is because we aren't amalgamating with nature. We're continuing to demolish our biosphere to keep up with the rapidly growing population. I decided to integrate my house with nature (waterfalls). There's no need to tear down a whole ecosystem when you can just circumnavigate around or build within it. 

As shown by my design, it certainly is possible to salvage our declining natural resources by changing our detrimental habits and by building eco-friendly systems. I don't expect change to happen overnight. It's going to take effort, patience, and funds to make a substantial difference. However long it will take, we need to take immediate action now to secure not only our livelihood but the livelihood of future generations.

Works Cited:

Michael Keenan. (2013). Too Much of a Good Thing: How Overpopulation, Overconsumption, and Failing

Distributive Justice Programs are Imperiling Mankind, 24 Vill. Envtl. L.J. 59.

[humanitiesnb]

PUBLIC ART

For this assignment, I didn't have to travel very far. I work at the downtown Baker Hospital campus (NCH) and in order for me to get inside the building, I have to pass through the Garden of Hope and Courage. This garden is adorned with an oasis of mother nature's bridesmaids (flowers and trees) that seem to pulsate with affection each time a person passes by them. However, at the entrance is where the wedding ceremony begins. At the entrance stands the garden's 500 pound bride—Bloom. Compared to the other sculptures found in the garden, Bloom is by far the tallest and largest one. Although it's possible to view Bloom at different angles, I don't advise you to. I feel like to truly appreciate and feel the poignant energy that emits from this sculpture, one would have to be in front of it.

I want to focus on the object that's in Bloom's hand—a hibiscus. A hibiscus flower symbolizes hospitality, prosperity, and interestingly femininity. The reason I find this odd is because Bloom isn't just holding a hibiscus, she's holding a hibiscus stamen. A stamen is the male reproductive "organ" of a hibiscus. To me this juxtaposition of femininity and masculinity that Bloom portrays perfectly represents the purpose of this garden—hope and courage. The feminine traits of empathy, tenderness, and tranquility are embraced throughout the garden. Stationed at every corner lies benches, trees, and other small sculptures dedicated by family members to their loved ones. On my breaks, I love to read the heartfelt and encouraging messages that people have made. I find that the outpouring of warmth and adoration that's so evident in these messages coupled with the brilliant works of art is impactful. In the midst of "your spirit lives on'' or "you'll never be forgotten", I find myself on the verge of tears when I realize how magnificent and good my life truly is. I would say that the sole purpose of this garden is to allow hospital personnel, patients, and visitors to escape life's adversities and immerse themselves in calmness and deep reflection. The masculine traits of courage and strength are also present. There are myriads upon myriads of signs and chalk art dedicated to the health care workers. During the height of COVID, I remember walking through the garden during my lunch break and seeing chalk messages made by elementary school students telling us how much we're their heroes and to not give up. Reading those messages undoubtedly gave me a boost of energy. 

Crafted by Kathy Spalding and gifted to the hospital by the D'Amico family, Bloom is the embodiment of dauntlessness. The way that Bloom is positioned—her being thrusted outwards indicative of a flower blooming—makes me feel like I'm on the edge of a rebirth. Whatever trials and heartache I’m facing, I will get through them and in the end it will transform me into a better person. I already mentioned the symbolism of the hibiscus stamen in relation to Bloom but I also want to point out how it's the only region that's painted in color. This splash of color in a sea of moss green allows the viewer to take immediate notice of the stamen. This is a clever tactic on Spalding's part because it highlights the overall goal of the garden—to rejuvenate. It's interesting to me that with her outstretched arm, Bloom is firmly latching onto that stamen. I interpret this in two ways. One, it's as if Bloom is holding onto that last bit of strength that she has; two, it's as if Bloom lost all her strength but is beginning to come anew. Both meanings represent courage—it takes courage to not give up even when others around you are or telling you to and it takes courage to try something new. I feel like this gesture was dedicated to the patients. Patients are constantly being poked and prodded in hopes of either ruling out a diagnosis or receiving a diagnosis. They’re being bombarded with false expectations and negative test results. It takes them a great amount of resilience to not let their hope waver, to continue to search for answers and solutions, and in the wake of bad news to not get dejected.

The fact that NCH permitted a garden to be made and a 500 pound sulpture to be placed on their property tells me that they prioritize a person's quality of life. They want their nurses, physicians, lab techs, unit secretaries, etc to not sacrifice their own health for the sake of others. I also feel like Bloom being at the forefront of the employee entrance is NCH's way of thanking and recognizing the patients, their loved ones, and the hospital staff for their persistent display of courage and hope.

[humanitiesnb]

ABSTRACT IMAGES

When I first looked at Rufino Tamayo’s Children’s Games, I immediately thought of growing old and to a lesser extent dementia. At a quick glance, one can see that Children’s Games is overwhelmingly drenched in red. Red is typically associated with passion and anger but in the context of this artwork, red symbolizes energy. I find it fascinating that Tamayo doesn’t use an animated red instead he uses a more subdued shade. The lack of richness in this specific red hue demonstrates the slow degradation of the human mind. Research has shown that as we age our frontal cortex–which is responsible for our memory and social behavior–shrinks. With our brain mass decreasing, our cognitive abilities also decline. When we’re young not only are we filled with vigor but we’re also easily able to recall events, names, places, and the like. Our brain is essentially engulfed in a sea of intense red. However, when we’re older it’s more of a challenge to remember and do things. At that point, our brains are being suffocated by a lifeless and dull color of red. 

The next abundant color is pink. Unlike the color red, Tamayo uses a vigorous baby pink color that’s painted in three distinct spots. Baby pink is most associated with innocence, friendliness, and naivety. When a person has dementia, they often revert back to having childlike behaviors. As a result, they’re seen as guileless and malleable and sadly are taken advantage of (just like children are). It’s interesting that pink is only shown in three different areas—the left, the middle, and the right. These locations remarkably correspond to the three divisions of our brain—the hindbrain, the midbrain, and the forebrain. When comparing the three pink placements to each other, it’s clear that the left side has the smallest dosage of pink. The hindbrain is similar. Our hindbrain regulates our autonomic functions such as breathing and digestion. Although these functions are crucial to life, in the context of what this painting illustrates (memory loss and aging) it’s insignificant. The two spots where pink is in abundance are in the middle and on the right. In regards to the theme of the painting, the mid and forebrain accurately portrays this. Our midbrain section–which manages our motor performance and agility–diminishes greatly as we age. Our forebrain section–which deals with our recollection capabilities–also wanes as we age.

The last two colors that are shown are gold and blue. Gold is used to depict wisdom and we often associate the gift of discernment with the elderly. There's only a single area where gold is incorporated and that area isn't too big nor too small–it's just the right size. That perfect amount of gold that Tamayo painted correlates beautifully with the blue. Having too much wisdom transforms a person to become cynical while not having enough brings undue sorrow. In the middle of the painting, the shade of blue that's used isn't too dark which would symbolize distress and it isn't too light which would represent immaturity. That color blue is just...blue. This ordinary blue hue that Tamayo utilizes symbolizes tranquility. The fact that this blue is almost at the center of the painting speaks a great deal about a specific message. For me, the placement illustrates that aging gracefully is a myth. I would say about 99.9% of the elderly population is almost content with the way that their lives turned out. If you ask them what they regret doing or most importantly regret not doing they always give an answer. They're complacent but not fulfilled.

The way that the lines are soft and delicate and at times intertwined with each other makes me feel somber. As you grow older, your mind isn't what it used to be–thoughts get jumbled up and your speech is sometimes delayed. Through analyzing this piece, I've come to the realization that the idea of growing old terrorizes me.

[humanitiesnb]

REPRESENTATIVE WORK

When I first came across this artwork, my eyes immediately went to the cage and then to the birds. When a person thinks about a bird their mind doesn’t automatically go towards entrapment. In fact, in many cultures, birds symbolize liberation. The artist makes a deliberate choice to place a cage that represents restriction next to a flock of birds that represents freedom. This type of juxtaposition elicits a melancholy tone to the artwork. Birds, who innately are supposed to fly, aren’t supposed to be deprived of their autonomy. I find it interesting that the artist uses dark colors at the bottom but as you go up the artwork they utilize vivid colors like yellow, green, and orange. The way that this artist operates with gloomy and intense colors reminds me of a quote that goes "if you hit rock bottom, you can only go up from there". To me, the dark blue and black represents the abyss where all people and aspirations go to perish. However, once you pummel into the cavern, it's possible to soar into the red and orange littered sky. A new birth.

I should also note that the background reminds me of a sunset meaning that the birds were most likely detained for a long period of time. When you place an object in the direct sun, you would expect it to rust or for the colors to fade. However, the colors on each bird did not dim at all. To me, this represents that even though one might be constantly bombarded by family expectations, society expectations, or their own mind, their flame will never be extinguished. 

Ever since my family and I immigrated to the United States of America, the life that I’m living is not my own. My parents eradicated their entire lives just so that my brothers and I could have a better one. Since I’m the eldest, I feel a sense of responsibility to pay back what my parents have sacrificed tenfold. Growing up I could never do what my heart truly yearned for. Every decision I made—from what to eat to how to act—was always to pay back the loan that my parents imposed on me. I always had to think about my actions and whether or not they would reflect negatively on my family. Even now, I’m pursuing a field that I’m miserable in but I know will satisfy my parents. I'm like a winged creature who is destined to fly but is imprisoned in a diminutive enclosure. There’s this lingering sense of doom that is seething in me—the embrace of freedom will forever be a foreign concept to me. However, when I look at this artwork I’m reminded that it is possible to break free from the shackles that confine me. It may take a long time as evident by the sun beginning to set in the painting but it will happen.