honeybeebubblepop

[honeybeebubblepop]

Tahun 2025 aku bakal kerja di InJourney..

Atau ga jadi pns di kemenpar

Pokonya kerjaan negeri yg gabut hehe

Aamiin

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Mau seberapa keras aku untuk menyibukkan diri sendiri, seberapa banyak film yang aku tonton dalam sehari, seberapa sering self-talk dan afirmasi yang aku kasih untuk diri aku sendiri, nyatanya tetap tidak pernah menutupi rasa kesepian.

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YaAllah gapapa jodoh aku lama datengnya, tp nanti pas dia dateng yang cukup mapan ya.. aamiin

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The never ending 2 months full of convo finally come to an end.

I watched you become a stranger.

Someone I once knew but now barely recognize.

I don’t know either you or me whos bussy building the fortress.

I wish for a sign, any sign, but you just give me all of this mixed signals.

And finally he didn’t reply to my last message.

And I didn’t send again.

We just disappeared from each other’s world.

I used to want to find an answer,

I tried to find it

But now I realise there’s no need for me to ask.

Because at the end of the last conversation, that was already an answer.

Is it just me feel the butterflies since never?

Or

Are you just another man who leaves?

[honeybeebubblepop]

Semoga semua kekhawatiran, ketakutan dan kesedihan aku perihal jodoh akan dibayar tuntas sama Allah.. aamiin

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You should never have shame about your academic journey. It's a journey. You're growing and learning. You're going to face challenges alone for one of the first times in your life. Shit's hard. It's ok to struggle.

I haven't had a pretty journey at all. I'm graduating with a bachelor's degree at 25. I've been in college nonstop since I was 18. I've failed a lot of classes and had to go part time. So many things have happened. But I will have the degree. And that degree is worth the exact same as someone who got it in 3 years. The knowledge I have is mine to keep.

How I got here doesn't matter. I'm here. I am going to graduate in a few months. I have won this chapter of my life. And to those who try to shame me for how I got here and how long it took, I pray that you never experience the things I have that have made it take long. May you live a life of comfort and luxury and have hands soft as silk until you die. And hopefully I will get the same grace from the universe eventually.

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Life is a trully constant struggle

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Unpopular thought to my future kids:

Nda usahakan cari ayah yang baik buat kamu ya. 🫶🏻

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I really wish that my other half is a person who help me grows 🌱

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Aku harap, jodoh aku adalah orang yang betul2 bisa menerima aku beserta permasalahan aku dengan orang tua hehe

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Wish-ku di malam sebelum bertambah usia:

Semoga aku tidak merasakan sepi yang berlarut.

Kayanya untuk sekarang ini dulu deh..

[honeybeebubblepop]

I really want to have a place, to share all of my stories, my worries and my biggest dreams.

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매일 밤을 울던 날

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I really need someone to hug me and give me “puk-puk” on my back, and say “Billa, you are enough, you are worth”

If I found that kind of person, i might be crying.

Nangbrut. Nangis brutal.

[honeybeebubblepop]

Kamu pernah dikatain apa aja sama ibu kandung sendiri?

Kalo aku, pas SMA aku pernah dikatain “anak goblok” sebelum berangkat sekolah

Terus hari ini, aku dikatain “anak goreng patut” pas di hari aku off habis kerja 4 hari hahaha

Duluuu banget, pas habis masalah tunangan aku pernah dikatain kalo aku jadi anak itu dosanya banyak, ngomongnya gini “Kamu tu tau ga? Dosa kamu tu banyak banget sm orang tua”.

Padahal, aku tunangan pun ngikutin kemauan dia yg pengen punya mantu tentara.

Lucu kan jd aku?

☺️

[honeybeebubblepop]

It’s quite sad knowing that my crush already has a girlfriend and they walk together to the car, and maybe going home (?) i dunno.. but, it’s sounds hurt for me ˙◠˙

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I have a crush on him, it’s getting bigger and bigger day by day