holyghostbws

[holyghostbws]

How have you been? x

hi love!

been good thank you :) hbu? 🩷

[holyghostbws]

Astrology anon again :) Hi. Thanks for being so nice xx So my other q's (at the moment haha):

I feel like it’s quite a mix then for Leo’s - they can be confident but also insecure?

Do you also know how each of the boys signs are compatible / not compatible with each other?

hii! sorry for answering this late, i don’t check this app everyday hahaha, i’ll make a longer post later explaining how/why i think, according to astrology, the boys work well together and are friends✨

and as for leos, yeah i agree with you. they like to give off this “i’m so confident, i’m unstoppable” kind of energy but like i mentioned before, most of the times it’s kinda like a mask to cover up their insecurities or to reinforce that idea for themselves, they need constant reassurance, which could explain why they care so much about their physical appearance, they like the attention that it gets them.

[holyghostbws]

Hi I’m the anon that always asks follow up questions on @nothingbutbws blog, just wanted to say thank you directly for explaining things - I find it so interesting! I do have more questions but I don’t want to be annoying lol xxxx

hi babee! thank you for being so nice 💘 and also thank you to @nothingbutbws for being so patient haha i kinda feel bad sometimes, i feel like i’m using her blog

feel free to drop your questions or any other comments you have :) you’re not annoying at all, i enjoy doing this ✨

[holyghostbws]

hiii, do you take requests? if so, could you do an angst imagine where Brad is going thru a tough time/breakup and the band mates help him out?

posted love! 🩷🩷

[holyghostbws]

heartbreaks and mistakes ; bws 💔

| Based on this request: hiii, do you take requests? if so, could you do an angst imagine where Brad is going thru a tough time/breakup and the band mates help him out? |

They met in december. Brad could still remember the first time it snowed that year because that same day he met her. In that very moment it had felt as if time had stop, he swore he could see the snowflakes falling in slow motion, glistening as they fell into the ground, almost as bright as her smile.

Every time they’d go out together, Brad would immediately reach for her hand. He didn’t have to look at it, he knew exactly the position of her fingers and how to intertwine them with his. If the air was too cold, he would gladly take his jacket off and put it around her shoulders; sometimes he secretly wished she would forget hers, just so he could give it his, let his arms be his blanket and let the world know she had someone. With time, forgotten clothes started to appear scattered around his flat, only for him to put them in an empty drawer that then became hers. Sometimes it wasn’t just clothes, sometimes it was an earring resting on her pillow, a scrunchie forgotten in the bathroom, the smell of her perfume in his sheets.

Brad could still picture every moment with her like it was a movie, he often found himself replaying memories in his head as if they were episodes of a tragic love story. It made no sense that he had burned and deleted all of their pictures together and even blocked her on social media, because their love was inked to his skin. Their relationship was built upon small, meaningful moments… she was home to Brad, but Brad wasn’t home to her.

Brad remembered the first time he met her parents. Unfortunately, it wasn’t something planned, they met them on one of their dates by accidentally running into them. She had introduced Brad as a friend although they were way past that state. Still, he said nothing and thought she had her reasons, maybe her parents were difficult, maybe she wanted to introduce him at a better time like a family gathering… he should’ve known. He should’ve known since the moment he said “i love you” and she never said it back, instead, she started a brand new conversation about weather. He had been foolish, he had been blinded by love and was too busy falling for her to see that he was the only one falling.

He had already pictured a future with her. They would host Christmas for their family and friends, full of peppermint-flavored kisses and presents, romantic dates on Valentines, picnics in the middle of flowers blooming, sweaty summers by the beach, matching outfits for Halloween… they never made it that far.

It was heartbreak after heartbreak for him during that relationship: “sorry I can’t meet your parents, I just think we should wait until the right moment”, “no, I can’t go out with you and your friends tonight, I have so much work to do”, “I’m so sorry I missed your concert, I know it was important to you and trust me, I hate myself for missing it but things got messy at work and they wouldn’t let me leave… you don’t want me getting fired, right?”, “I promise i’ll make it up to you”, “I swear it’s the last time that this happens”, “I’m sorry babe, please understand that it was out of my hands”, “Please believe me, I swear it won’t happen again”… There’s only so much pain a heart can take and Brad’s had been strong for so long, it was bound to happen: the breakup.

The blind fell to the floor on his birthday, when she didn’t show up. Just as many times before, she promised she’d be there on time, and he believed her, of course. Even he knew, deep in his heart, he was gonna be let down again, he decided to trust her; another mistake added to the already long list. Even in a room full of people who loved him, Brad felt miserable. How come everyone but her was there to celebrate him?

He wondered what he had done wrong to deserve that, maybe it was karma, maybe he was a shitty boyfriend, maybe it was a lesson he had to learn. It didn’t mattered why anymore, she didn’t love him and the only way to get through it was to blur everything out by getting wasted with his best mates, the ones that did show up, the ones that did care for him.

A week after his birthday, the call came.

“Hey, I think we need to talk” she said. The sentence every lover fears the most. The sentence that ends it all. Her voice sounded distant, like it was muffled. Hearing her break his heart for the millionth time would destroy him, he need to protect himself, so he tried to dissociate as much as he could from the conversation.

“About what?” He asked, trying to play it cool. He already knew, he knew exactly how it was going to go, he knew how she would try to act like she cared, like it was a difficult decision to make but after all it was the right choice.

“Can I see you? I’ll drop by your place.” He didn’t want to see her ever again, it would only make things worse for him, it would make him feel guilty when he didn’t have any reason to feel that way. It was true, but it was also true that he did want to see her, he wanted to see her everyday for the rest of his life, he wanted to see her when he woke up and when he went to sleep, he wanted to see her smiling and wanted to see her crying. Brad wanted to see her young face and then also her face after time had aged it. He wanted her, forever.

“I’m so sorry I didn’t make it” Was the first thing she said when he opened the door. Brad stood still and quiet and watched her face filling with something that seemed like regret.

“Did you even try to go?” He asked after a while. His voice was calm, he tried to appear neutral and unbothered but his eyes gave him away. There was no hiding the sadness and disappointment in them.

Her dropping her head to the floor was enough answer for him. She didn’t. And he knew that, still, it didn’t make it easier.

“I honestly don’t know what to say to you. I don’t even know why you’re here. It’s so obvious that you never cared and that you don’t feel the same way, so why bother? Don’t you have better things to do?” He still kept calm but could feel his insides shattering with every second that passed.

“Stop being so dramatic, Brad. I had a really shitty week and came here to apologize.” She rolled her eyes.

“Oh, sorry for bothering you and interrupting your apology, I have no right to be mad at you.” He could feel himself running out of patience.

“Oh god” She whined. “I knew it was a bad idea coming here, it’s impossible to talk to you when you’re like this…”

“You’re right, it was a bad idea for you to come here, you should go.” Brad said.

“I’m trying to tell you something, you asshole” She started raising her voice.

“I don’t want to hear it. I’m sick and tired of you, of always waiting for you just so you never show up, of keeping up with your bad moods and hurtful words, of always giving and receiving nothing back, I-“

“I’m sorry! I really am! I’m trying my best to be enough for you. I just want to be with you.” Her voice sounded high pitched, like she was about to cry but her eyes were dry.

“Cut the bullshit and don’t go wasting my time. Don’t waste yours. I see through your lies, I just pretended I didn’t because I loved you and wanted to believe you, but we can stop now.” The calmness in Brad faded away and was replaced by anger.

For a second, silence filled the atmosphere.

“I love you.” That was a stab that stroke to kill. It fueled him with rage and suddenly he wanted to stab her back, to hurt her as much as she did to him, but how could you hurt someone that simply doesn’t care?

Months ago, those three little words were all he wanted to hear. It’s funny how words mean nothing when they’re a little too late.

“Goodbye, y/n.”

💔

A week and a half was the longest he could keep the break up a secret from his band mates, they noticed his eyes had lost its sparkle and the bags under them.

“How you holding up mate?” James was the first one to ask. James already knew the answer to that question but felt like Brad could use the talking… that would’ve worked if Brad was communicative about his pain.

“I’m fine, actually.” Brad answered. The first days were rough for him but he had already managed to keep his feelings bottled up, regretting it and beating himself up would be of no use and besides, why would he keep being sad and mad about a relationship that was already dead? It was better to just move on and keep going on with his life, after all, the world wasn’t going to stop and nothing would change just because she didn’t love him.

“You know it’s okay to talk about your feelings, right? There’s no shame here.” James reassured him.

“Yeah, you can talk to us about anything.” Tristan intervened.

“There’s nothing to talk about. She never cared about me, why would I care about her?” Brad said, it sounded way more harsh that he intended to.

There was nothing his band mates could say that would make him feel better, that would at least ease the grieving. Memories stung him, it was like a disease with no cure and time was only a cruel reminder of a love that had maimed him.

“Yeah, mate. Fuck her. You can have any girl that you want, we should go out tonight.” Connor said. James wanted to kill him.

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s go out! You’ll forget about her in no time” Tristan chirped in.

“I think it’s a good idea to distract yourself but I also think you should talk about your feelings with someone and not just go and fuck the first woman you find.” James intervened, afraid of how the others would take his words.

“Oh shut up, James. What Brad needs right now is a night out to get wasted and meet a pretty face.” Tristan said with a laugh.

“Hey! Let’s go to Ibizaaaaaaa!” Connor screamed.

Brad stopped listening to his friends plans after that. He loved them, he really did, but none of them had the answers for mending his broken heart.

“Hey, uh, what if we try writing something?” Brad said after a while. Tristan and Connor stopped talking and turned their heads to him.

“Writing? Seriously?” Connor said in disbelief.

“I mean… sure, if that’s going to help you.” Tristan said and gave him a pat in his back.

“It’s a great idea! I’ll bring the guitar.” James said, seeing it as an opportunity for Brad to open up.

Brad had handwritten notes he found deep in his drawer right in his pocket: words of love that he had thought of turning into a song, into an album even… maybe those would now turn into an angry song or a sad one, or maybe into nothing. That was the magic of songwriting. After all, music and his friends had always been his therapy.

[holyghostbws]

oh no, I’m so sorry to hear this): I would never block them, I swear 🥺🥺🥺 I don’t know what’s happening with my account ): i’ve looked in settings but everything seems normal. /// she still doesn't have access, her profile is blocked by your account :(

that’s so weird): I tried blocking her for real and unblocking her and also unfollowing and following HAHAHA

see if it’s visible now please? 💗

[holyghostbws]

Helloo why I have my friend @multifandomsugar blocked?

she told me that she tried to enter your profile to read your imagines but it says it is blocked

sorry to bother <3

oh no, I’m so sorry to hear this): I would never block them, I swear 🥺🥺🥺 I don’t know what’s happening with my account ): i’ve looked in settings but everything seems normal.

here’s the link to my account, hope it helps🫶

[holyghostbws]

Hellooo, i read your headcanon about Brad dating a Christian... do you guys know what religion he and his family practices? I've seen them wearing crosses sometimes.

Thank you.

hi babe, i’ll be honest, i don’t know for sure his religion but i think they could be christian according to his mom’s posts and well, it makes sense with the geographic stuff cause as far as i know, christian is the main religion in England :)

[holyghostbws]

hi babes,

Brad finally posted haha and I think some pics could be inspo for new imagines, so if you have requests, send them in :) 💖 i’ll be happy to write them “quickly” since i’ve been having more free time now.

kisses✨

[holyghostbws]

🎶✨when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite accs (positivity is cool)🎶✨ (idk who’s already been sent this or hasn’t hahahaha <3) Love your blog a lot btw💛

tysm luv🥺💖 here are my songs:

• the lakes - Taylor Swift

• free if we want it - nothing but thieves

• people of the pride / coloratura / humankind - Coldplay

• nothing but you - the vamps

• last hope - paramore

[holyghostbws]

Based on the song “The Story of Us” by Taylor Swift.

Sorry not sorry, I really love Taylor 😩💕

Don’t know if this counts as angst but it’s definitely not happy

the story of us ; bws

The loud music made the floor feel like it was moving, colorful lights welcomed her as soon as she entered the house and the cold breeze from outside was quickly replaced by a warm one. The smell of alcohol was abundant, just as the plastic cups and empty bottles on the floor. She came alone, she was told she’d met her new friend, Ava, there, but she was starting to think she should’ve stayed home.

Most of the people in the room were strangers to her, she wasn’t one of those girls that spent every weekend at a pub or party, she felt uncomfortable with big crowds, they gave them anxiety; it was a big step for y/n coming to this one party, even more knowing that Brad, her ex, could be attending it too, but “you have to meet new people, make connections and most important, you have to show Brad that you’ve moved on, that you don’t care about him anymore”, her older sister said. Y/n thought about that, she certainly didn’t have to prove Brad anything, truth is, she was only there hoping she could see him one last time. To say they didn’t end in good terms would be an understatement, the break up was ugly, mostly because of miscommunication and misunderstandings, but y/n learned about that way too late. Now she didn’t know how Brad felt, she wondered if he had moved on or missed her as much as she missed him, the doubt was killing her.

She stepped into the living room, carefully scanning it for a place to sit —and also wishing she saw Brad somewhere in the house—, only to find there was no place to sit. The only couch in the room was already occupied by couples making out, so she decided to wander around the house alone, looking for Ava. It wasn’t long until his eyes met a curly head. Brad hadn’t saw her yet, he was talking to a group of people and his back was facing her, he would have to turn around to notice the girl behind him, staring uncomfortably. Even if he turned and saw her, what would be the use? They weren’t on speaking terms, things would be so awkward, that’s why y/n decided to stare from a distance and at the minimum movement, she would turn her feet into the opposite direction so Brad couldn’t see her.

“Y/n! You made it!” She was startled by the voice beside her.

“Ava, hi” Y/n greeted her friend, “Thanks for having me”

“Sure” Ava smiled, “I’ll be honest with you, I didn’t think you would come, but I’m glad you did.”

Y/n tried to give a polite smile back, but it was obvious she wasn’t having the time of her life.

“I know you’re out of your comfort zone, but no need to be nervous. It’s always fun to try new things, don’t you think?” Ava asked, holding her hand.

“Yeah, I guess” Y/n answered. She wanted to go home, she was already having a bad feeling about what would happen next.

“Come, I’ll introduce you to some friends, they’re really nice, you’ll like them.” Ava didn’t even let y/n open her mouth to speak, she was already pulling her hand towards Brad’s direction, it was too late when she realized Ava was taking her to Brad’s group.

She felt ridiculous the moment she was standing in front of Brad’s friends. She felt so out of place, starting for the fact that her clothes made her feel childish compared to the ones Brad’s girl friends were using, reveling a little much for her liking, clothes so tight they showed all their curves while she was wearing baggy clothes; but that wasn’t the worst thing. The worst thing was that seconds prior to her arrival Brad seemed so happy, he was laughing and having fun but the moment she came, everything changed and his laugh stopped abruptly. He no longer looked happy, he looked miserable, like his night had just been ruined.

“S’up guys! This is y/n, my new friend.” Ava introduced her to the group with a smile.

“Hi”

“Heyyy”

“Hello” y/n replied, not wanting to make direct eye contact with any of them.

A few minutes passed between conversations, and she noticed how Brad stood silent, not daring to even look at her once, his friends didn’t seem to notice either and if they did, they didn’t seem to care. Y/n wondered what was going on inside his mind and couldn’t help but think about all the things she wish she could say to him, about all the walls she wanted to tear down in order to be as close to him as they used to.

Without even thinking, y/n started to pull at her clothes slightly every few seconds, looking around everywhere, not paying much attention to the talk, sometimes even biting her nails, something she did when she was nervous or anxious. Brad wasn’t looking at her in the eye, but the small actions didn’t go unnoticed, he knew her all too well, and couldn’t help but stare at her when she wasn’t looking.

It was killing her having him that close but knowing they were so far away, she wondered if it was killing him as well, not being able to kiss her, to touch her, to talk to her, to even look in her direction. She thought about all the times she would attend small parties and gatherings with him, her spot always next to him —the only time when she would go out with big crowds was when he was there to help her calm down— and how different things were now. She thought about how something that what could’ve been a great love story to tell their kids and then grandkids ended up in being a great tragedy instead.

“Y/n, are you okay? You look pale” Ava asked kindly. All eyes turned to her, except Brad’s, he didn’t looked interested at all in anything involving her.

“Yeah, yeah. It’s just a little bit chilly here” She answered, trying to sound careless, but inside feeling a embarrassed that Ava exposed just how uncomfortable she really was. She remember her sister’s words, she had to act tough around Brad, now she knew.

“Oh, okay. Want to go inside?” Ava didn’t even know about Brad and her but her words were making everything 100 times more uncomfortable.

“No, I’m fine.” Y/n said, she was determined to stay right there, in front of Brad, acting as his presence didn’t make her want to cry, acting as if she wasn’t having a meltdown.

“You should go though, we don’t want you catching a cold, do we?” Brad finally spoke, but his tone wasn’t kind, it was sarcastic, as if he was making fun of her. Y/n didn’t understand why the attack at first but then understood that Brad had kept a bad image of her after the breakup.

“I’m not that fragile, don’t worry about my health.” She answered sarcastically too. He wasn’t the only one who could play the game.

“Oh believe me, I don’t” Brad laughed. The conversation had died and was replaced with an uncomfortable silence, tension filled the air. Nobody talked, they were just listening to their conversation awkwardly, not knowing what to do or say.

Y/n didn’t want to keep quiet, a sudden feeling of rage invading her. Sure, they weren’t friends but Brad didn’t need to be such an asshole towards her.

“Then why ask? Keep your mouth shout.” Maybe the sentence was a little harsh, but there was no going back now, he started it.

Brad scoffed, looking offended. “Yeah, you’re right. This is what I get for trying to be nice, but I honestly don’t give a fuck.”

“Nobody asked you to be nice.” Y/n replied coldly.

“What the fuck is your problem? You’re so fucking defensive for nothing, get over yourself.” Brad’s works hurt her deeply and maybe he knew for the way she looked at the floor but didn’t move, didn’t even tried to apologize. Why would he? She was the one that owed him and apology, for everything she did.

For the rest of the night they parted ways, avoiding each other as much as they could, and if they happened to bump into each other, it was like a competition to see who acted like they care less better. Y/n regretted going to that party, deep inside, she had started the night thinking they could talk and fix things, not getting back together of course, but at least setting things clear and leaving the grudges behind. Clearly, she was a fool. Brad didn’t want anything to do with her, he wanted her out of his life, but seemed like an impossible task because everything reminded him of her, no matter how mad he was.

Y/n thought about this new version of Brad, the post-breakup-asshole-idontgiveafuck Brad, and how she liked him better when he was on her side. They were just like strangers now, maybe enemies would fit too. But if Brad came one day saying he was sick of fighting and being mean to each other, she’d let her armor down again in a heartbeat. All y/n wanted to hear from his lips was “I’m sorry, I’d rather love than fight. Let’s stop this nonsense, let’s talk”, but that would never happen, and their story was just a tragedy now.

[holyghostbws]

hi guys, just posted a new imagine about Brad being a little bit of an asshole haha, I do think that if he ended in bad terms (like, if he was hurt really badly because of her or something like that) with an ex he would 100% try to act like he doesn’t care and just ignore her.

how do you think he would act?? 👀 I’m curious to know what you guys think so you can share your opinions if you want :)

✨also, if you have requests you can send them in💕

[holyghostbws]

Based on the song “The Story of Us” by Taylor Swift.

Sorry not sorry, I really love Taylor 😩💕

Don’t know if this counts as angst but it’s definitely not happy

the story of us ; bws

The loud music made the floor feel like it was moving, colorful lights welcomed her as soon as she entered the house and the cold breeze from outside was quickly replaced by a warm one. The smell of alcohol was abundant, just as the plastic cups and empty bottles on the floor. She came alone, she was told she’d met her new friend, Ava, there, but she was starting to think she should’ve stayed home.

Most of the people in the room were strangers to her, she wasn’t one of those girls that spent every weekend at a pub or party, she felt uncomfortable with big crowds, they gave them anxiety; it was a big step for y/n coming to this one party, even more knowing that Brad, her ex, could be attending it too, but “you have to meet new people, make connections and most important, you have to show Brad that you’ve moved on, that you don’t care about him anymore”, her older sister said. Y/n thought about that, she certainly didn’t have to prove Brad anything, truth is, she was only there hoping she could see him one last time. To say they didn’t end in good terms would be an understatement, the break up was ugly, mostly because of miscommunication and misunderstandings, but y/n learned about that way too late. Now she didn’t know how Brad felt, she wondered if he had moved on or missed her as much as she missed him, the doubt was killing her.

She stepped into the living room, carefully scanning it for a place to sit —and also wishing she saw Brad somewhere in the house—, only to find there was no place to sit. The only couch in the room was already occupied by couples making out, so she decided to wander around the house alone, looking for Ava. It wasn’t long until his eyes met a curly head. Brad hadn’t saw her yet, he was talking to a group of people and his back was facing her, he would have to turn around to notice the girl behind him, staring uncomfortably. Even if he turned and saw her, what would be the use? They weren’t on speaking terms, things would be so awkward, that’s why y/n decided to stare from a distance and at the minimum movement, she would turn her feet into the opposite direction so Brad couldn’t see her.

“Y/n! You made it!” She was startled by the voice beside her.

“Ava, hi” Y/n greeted her friend, “Thanks for having me”

“Sure” Ava smiled, “I’ll be honest with you, I didn��t think you would come, but I’m glad you did.”

Y/n tried to give a polite smile back, but it was obvious she wasn’t having the time of her life.

“I know you’re out of your comfort zone, but no need to be nervous. It’s always fun to try new things, don’t you think?” Ava asked, holding her hand.

“Yeah, I guess” Y/n answered. She wanted to go home, she was already having a bad feeling about what would happen next.

“Come, I’ll introduce you to some friends, they’re really nice, you’ll like them.” Ava didn’t even let y/n open her mouth to speak, she was already pulling her hand towards Brad’s direction, it was too late when she realized Ava was taking her to Brad’s group.

She felt ridiculous the moment she was standing in front of Brad’s friends. She felt so out of place, starting for the fact that her clothes made her feel childish compared to the ones Brad’s girl friends were using, reveling a little much for her liking, clothes so tight they showed all their curves while she was wearing baggy clothes; but that wasn’t the worst thing. The worst thing was that seconds prior to her arrival Brad seemed so happy, he was laughing and having fun but the moment she came, everything changed and his laugh stopped abruptly. He no longer looked happy, he looked miserable, like his night had just been ruined.

“S’up guys! This is y/n, my new friend.” Ava introduced her to the group with a smile.

“Hi”

“Heyyy”

“Hello” y/n replied, not wanting to make direct eye contact with any of them.

A few minutes passed between conversations, and she noticed how Brad stood silent, not daring to even look at her once, his friends didn’t seem to notice either and if they did, they didn’t seem to care. Y/n wondered what was going on inside his mind and couldn’t help but think about all the things she wish she could say to him, about all the walls she wanted to tear down in order to be as close to him as they used to.

Without even thinking, y/n started to pull at her clothes slightly every few seconds, looking around everywhere, not paying much attention to the talk, sometimes even biting her nails, something she did when she was nervous or anxious. Brad wasn’t looking at her in the eye, but the small actions didn’t go unnoticed, he knew her all too well, and couldn’t help but stare at her when she wasn’t looking.

It was killing her having him that close but knowing they were so far away, she wondered if it was killing him as well, not being able to kiss her, to touch her, to talk to her, to even look in her direction. She thought about all the times she would attend small parties and gatherings with him, her spot always next to him —the only time when she would go out with big crowds was when he was there to help her calm down— and how different things were now. She thought about how something that what could’ve been a great love story to tell their kids and then grandkids ended up in being a great tragedy instead.

“Y/n, are you okay? You look pale” Ava asked kindly. All eyes turned to her, except Brad’s, he didn’t looked interested at all in anything involving her.

“Yeah, yeah. It’s just a little bit chilly here” She answered, trying to sound careless, but inside feeling a embarrassed that Ava exposed just how uncomfortable she really was. She remember her sister’s words, she had to act tough around Brad, now she knew.

“Oh, okay. Want to go inside?” Ava didn’t even know about Brad and her but her words were making everything 100 times more uncomfortable.

“No, I’m fine.” Y/n said, she was determined to stay right there, in front of Brad, acting as his presence didn’t make her want to cry, acting as if she wasn’t having a meltdown.

“You should go though, we don’t want you catching a cold, do we?” Brad finally spoke, but his tone wasn’t kind, it was sarcastic, as if he was making fun of her. Y/n didn’t understand why the attack at first but then understood that Brad had kept a bad image of her after the breakup.

“I’m not that fragile, don’t worry about my health.” She answered sarcastically too. He wasn’t the only one who could play the game.

“Oh believe me, I don’t” Brad laughed. The conversation had died and was replaced with an uncomfortable silence, tension filled the air. Nobody talked, they were just listening to their conversation awkwardly, not knowing what to do or say.

Y/n didn’t want to keep quiet, a sudden feeling of rage invading her. Sure, they weren’t friends but Brad didn’t need to be such an asshole towards her.

“Then why ask? Keep your mouth shout.” Maybe the sentence was a little harsh, but there was no going back now, he started it.

Brad scoffed, looking offended. “Yeah, you’re right. This is what I get for trying to be nice, but I honestly don’t give a fuck.”

“Nobody asked you to be nice.” Y/n replied coldly.

“What the fuck is your problem? You’re so fucking defensive for nothing, get over yourself.” Brad’s works hurt her deeply and maybe he knew for the way she looked at the floor but didn’t move, didn’t even tried to apologize. Why would he? She was the one that owed him and apology, for everything she did.

For the rest of the night they parted ways, avoiding each other as much as they could, and if they happened to bump into each other, it was like a competition to see who acted like they care less better. Y/n regretted going to that party, deep inside, she had started the night thinking they could talk and fix things, not getting back together of course, but at least setting things clear and leaving the grudges behind. Clearly, she was a fool. Brad didn’t want anything to do with her, he wanted her out of his life, but seemed like an impossible task because everything reminded him of her, no matter how mad he was.

Y/n thought about this new version of Brad, the post-breakup-asshole-idontgiveafuck Brad, and how she liked him better when he was on her side. They were just like strangers now, maybe enemies would fit too. But if Brad came one day saying he was sick of fighting and being mean to each other, she’d let her armor down again in a heartbeat. All y/n wanted to hear from his lips was “I’m sorry, I’d rather love than fight. Let’s stop this nonsense, let’s talk”, but that would never happen, and their story was just a tragedy now.

[holyghostbws]

Based on this request: Can you write something about the Reader breaking up with Brad for walking away from the reader without realizing it?

like, i want something where she breaks up with him and he gets really bad, doesn't cut his hair, doesn't shave his mustache, doesn't leave the house and drinks a lot

but in the end they come back and he gets better with her help, she cuts his hair and shaves and helps him shower and he looks at her sad but cute and says something like "I don't deserve you take care of me"

i drove you away ; bws ⛈

People say there’s different stages when going through a break up, Brad had successfully skipped the part of denial. He knew there was no getting back together, he knew he fucked up and hurt her beyond words, but in his mind it was the right thing to do. Why would he keep a relationship he knew was destined to failure? Brad couldn’t give y/n what she needed, he was too afraid it might end badly again, and the only one losing would be him. Again. He already knew how it would go: he would start falling for her, he would let himself be vulnerable, when he least expected, he would realize he was madly, deeply, in love with her. Big mistake, because not long after, she would leave. Just like everyone else had done before. But what could be the reason this time? Maybe she would get bored, maybe she decided she didn’t really love him, maybe she found someone new, someone better.

It turned out, she didn’t want to leave, he did. And now Brad couldn’t find himself anywhere else, not when all he wanted was her. He was an open wound and every time something reminded him of her, it was like putting salt, the flesh of his skin would feel like burning, his heart would fall into the void in a loop. Brad couldn’t see past his insecurities, he had been hurt a lot before and felt foolish because once again, there he was, giving love one more chance, hoping and praying this time would be different, a part of him telling him that she was not like the others, that y/n did cared for him, but there was no use.

He tried to cover the pain with alcohol, at least feeling numb distracted him from reminiscing. Everyone around him knew, it was hard not to. He stopped hanging out with friends, instead, he stayed at home all day in his pajamas, drinking and drowning in self-pity, not even bothering in showering or shaving; he stopped writing music too, not even sad melodies would come up, he didn’t have the strength to write or even think about anything else but her; he rejected calls from everyone —including his mother—, invitations to events and parties. He secluded himself in his own world and no one seemed to be able to get him out of it.

Everyone around him knew, they knew this break up was very different from the others —not that he’s had a lot of meaningful relationships, but still—, it was heart wrenching, it was consuming him and it broke his friends’ heart to see him like this.

One night, his closest friends decided to surprise him with a hang out. They had no intention on getting him out of the house —that had been proved and tried endless times with no result—, instead, they tried a different approach by just being with him, trying to get him to talk, “maybe it will make him feel better”, James said to the group and they agreed.

“You want some whiskey?” Brad offered to his friends, lifting up the almost empty bottle.

“You barely have any whiskey left to share, mate” Tristan tried to joke.

“Nah, I’m good. There’s more in the cupboard” Brad shrugged his shoulders while he poured himself a drink and drowned it in one sip. His friends looked at each other worried when he started pouring another one just seconds after the first.

“Maybe you should go easy on the drink…” James said, unsure of what to do. Brad scoffed but didn’t listen, and started to take out the other bottle, along with more alcohol.

“You sure you don’t want?” He asked his friends again.

“You got beer?” Connor asked, giving up, thinking that maybe if he drank with him, Brad would open up.

“Sure” Brad opened the fridge and handed him a bottle. Tristan and Alex also took a bottle.

“When was the last time you showered? You’re starting to smell” Alex said, again, trying to joke.

“Yeah dude, you also need a haircut” Tristan joined.

“And to shave. That mustache isn’t a cute look” Connor added. They were trying to lighten up the mood but they achieved the opposite.

“Fuck off, I’m fine” Brad bickered. He had a mirror, he knew he looked awful, he know he should start moving on, but he couldn’t.

“Leave him, everyone has a process” James intervened.

“Thank you” Brad answered, lifting his new found bottle of beer as a thank you and took a sip.

“But I don’t think part of the process should be mixing all kinds of alcohol, mate.” James said shyly.

“Pff, bullshit” Brad groaned, “I really am fine, stop worrying, you’re annoying as fuck.”

“It’s just that this is not you, we want our friend back.” Tristan said, putting a hand on Brad’s shoulder.

“I’m here, I’m here”, he said, although he knew it wasn’t true. He wasn’t there, he wasn’t anywhere. He wasn’t himself anymore.

Eventually, his friends left and he stood alone in his living room once again, flashbacks of happier times playing inside of his mind. Times when the room was filled with laughter, when love felt so real it was almost tangible. He could almost feel her again, her arms around him, her lips kissing his face, her voice telling him it would all be okay. He broke down and after a while fell asleep on the couch, remembering and dreaming of what he had lost.

⛈

There he was once again, standing outside the door he knew too well. He had seen that door a million times before, seen it in summer, in winter, night and day. He never cared about that goddamn door, but this time… this time he cared. That door was the only thing separating him from the love of his life. That door was an opportunity and a weapon at the same time, knocking on it could end him, breaking his heart for the last time, or it could save him, it could start glueing the pieces of his broken heart back together.

The past few months had been rough for him —to say the least—, he had a hard time adjusting to a life without her, in which he failed miserably, but he had to try one last time. He had to stop being a coward, stop being afraid of love. All this time he had been caged inside his fears, inside his own mind that he lost the one thing that he did right. Brad didn’t knew if y/n would care that he came back, he didn’t even knew what to say once they were face to face, he was full of regrets and the only thing he knew was that he missed her. He really was trying, he just hoped she knew. So he almost knocked. It was the best he could do. He really almost knocked, he tried real hard, he was just seconds away, his hand made a fist that almost touched the wooden door. Almost.

It shouldn’t be this hard to knock on someone’s door, but for Brad it was, because at the last moment, he knew he couldn’t bear with losing her again, so he stopped. He didn’t have it in him to look at her face again and not break down before she could even say something like “go away, I hate you.” He was saving himself the hurt. It was for the best.

What Brad didn’t know though, was that behind that door she was waiting for him. She was waiting for him to knock on her door, to tell her that he was sorry and that he loved her, just like all the times he had been at her door. That moment never came, she just stood there looking at her phone screen, watching him through the security camera and waiting. Waiting, waiting, waiting. Waiting for nothing.

She was tired of it. It had been weeks of Brad coming to her house, just standing outside but never daring to knock on the door, she had watched him all those times. She knew Brad all too well, she knew he must be thinking that she hated him, so after a while, she figured it was her turn to knock on his door now. It took her about a week to pick up the courage and drive to his place but when she did, she knew there was no going back.

Brad couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw her standing there, at his door. He thought maybe it was an hallucination from all the alcohol he had been drinking, it was his mind playing him dirty. He even sobered up a little bit because of the shock of having y/n in front of him again after months and months of craving it.

“Y/n?” It sounded more like a question than a sentence, the words hardly coming out of his mouth, barely above a whisper.

“Hi” She spoke softly, almost whispering too.

“What are you doing here?”

I miss you, she wanted to say, but all that came out was: “Just wanted to know how you doing.”

“I’m doing fine, thank you” He replied politely, “How about you?”

“I’m doing good.” She peaked behind his shoulder, just to find his apartment completely trashed and looked at him with pity. When he realized, the tried to cover the view his body, but it was too late, now she knew too that he was a mess. “Can I come in?” This wasn’t part of her plan —she didn’t have one—, she was just following her heart at this point. And her heart wanted him.

He didn’t answered, instead he just moved out of the way, trying hard not to grab her and beg for forgiveness, because begging for another chance was the only thing he could think about.

“How you doing?” She asked again, this time looking at him straight in the eye, realizing that the brightness that once distinguished Brad’s eyes was no longer there, in its place, there was sadness and regret. Dark circles decorating his puppy eyes.

“I-I…” He couldn’t even finish the sentence, he was already sobbing and crying. His worst case scenario was happening, him breaking down in front of her with no apparent reason. He hated crying, he hated feeling vulnerable, but that’s what happens when you keep bottling up your emotions for three months straight, drinking them up.

Y/n didn’t move at first, she was taken back by the sudden reaction, but it didn’t take long until she was on her knees beside Brad, hugging him, caressing his hair and face, doing nothing but holding him. It didn’t make Brad feel better, actually, he felt worse. She didn’t have to do what she was doing, but still, there she was.

“I’m so sorry” Brad sobbed over and over. She knew he meant it more than anything.

“Shh, don’t be” Y/n whispered, not letting go of him, running her fingers through his curls, hoping it would help calm him down. “Want me to run you a bath? Maybe it helps you calm down a little bit, plus it seems like you need one” She offered, smiling a little.

Brad stayed quiet but nodded after a few seconds, suddenly feeling self-conscious because he and his flat looked like shit. There were bottles of alcohol scattered around the floor along with other trash, the floor was dirty, the sofa and table weren’t even in their place. He was equally as trashed, he hadn’t shave or cut his hair in three months, so there was a lot of extra hair in him, his eyes looked small because of the dark circles, his face was pale and he was thinner.

“Okay, I’ll be right back.” She smiled and caressed his cheek once more before leaving, Brad couldn’t help but close his eyes for a second.

Y/n knew her way through Brad’s apartment, after all, she had spent countless days and nights there. She turned on the bath, making sure the water’s temperature was just right before going back to the living room and founding Brad exactly where she left him.

“Come, it’s ready.” She offered him her hand and guided him, not dropping his hand. In the bathroom, she helped him undress, taking sight in how his ribs were showing because of the weight loss and then making him enter the bath tub. She didn’t ask, she just started putting shampoo on her hand and washing his hair, taking her time to massage his head, playing with the few curls left. When she was done, she opened the cabinet and took out everything she needed to help him shave. “You won’t need the mustache, believe me” She told him but he didn’t answered, he just stared at her with adoration and something she couldn’t quite decipher. She took her time to help him shave too, carefully putting on the shaving cream and leaving it there for a moment before cleaning it with a razor and a towel. Both of them were enjoying the moment, they didn’t need to talk, their presence was enough and the looks they exchanged every now and then told everything. They missed each other.

“I don’t deserve you take care of me. Why are you doing this?” Brad finally talked, his eyes almost tearing up, looking at her with remorse. She looked away and sighed.

“I’m going to let you finish and get dressed, when you’re done I’ll be waiting in the living room and then we can talk, okay?” Her eyes looked for his briefly before she stood up.

“Yes.”

While Brad finished, she managed to cook something for him with the few things he had left in the fridge and started to clean up a little bit.

Brad was feeling more at peace just by hearing the faint sound of her making movement in his living room. He felt ridiculous for breaking down in front of her but reminded himself that if he wanted to be worthy of her love he needed to stop being so guarded, real love is about letting yourself be vulnerable with your partner. He finally understood what he needed to do, he was finally willing to put everything at risk for her, it didn’t mattered anymore if he got hurt, he would give anything, or everything just to spend one more night by her side. So he took a deep breath and started walking towards the living room.

“Hey, are you feeling better?” She asked kindly, “I made you a little something to eat and some tea.”

His heart melted.

“Thank you. I can’t remember when was the last time I had a decent meal.” He answered sincerely. Y/n smiled sweetly at him, she could tell he was already feeling better and was in a lighter mood. “You didn’t have to clean up this place, you know? It’s my mess, I’ll fix it.”

“Oh I know, I just got tired of waiting for you to do it.” Y/n replied. She wasn’t talking about the salon, she was talking about their relationship.

“I’m sorry.” Brad said, his gaze falling to his lap.

“I know you are. I watched you stand outside my door for 20 minutes every three days for three weeks straight.”

He blushed at the sudden revelation, feeling ashamed and embarrassed.

“You saw me?” He asked.

“Yep.”

“Every day?”

“Yep.”

“And still you never opened the door? Never mind, it would’ve been worse, I didn’t know what to say then, I don’t know what to say now.”

“I was waiting for you to knock.” She simply answered and with just one look Brad knew she wasn’t only waiting for a knock on her door.

“I know I owe you more than an apology.”

“You don’t owe me anything.”

“Yes, I do.” He took a sip of his tea.

“No, you started to walk away from me, I figured you didn’t want me anymore, you didn’t give an explanation then, so I left. You don’t need to explain it now, it doesn’t matter anymore.” He could hear his heart break when she said that, it doesn’t matter anymore was what he feared the most. He was too late.

“It matters to me” he whispered, “you’re the one thing that matters the most to me, always have been.”

“It didn’t seem like it.”

“I know…” He couldn’t look her in the eye, “I know I was wrong, I know I fucked up and hurt you. You didn’t deserve any of that, I was afraid of falling again and it turning bad for me. I love you way too much, I knew it would break me for good if you left.”

“So you left first.” She said, finally understanding what had happened when they broke up.

“Yeah, I know I drove you away and trust me, there’s not a single day I don’t regret that choice. If I could do it all over, I would chose you breaking my heart every single day for the rest of my life if it meant I could have you.”

“Don’t say things you don’t mean.” She sobbed.

“I do mean it. I don’t want anyone else, ever. I want to wake up and find you by my side, I want you to be the person I come home to, I want to be vulnerable with you, I want to share all my insecurities, all of me with you. There’s nothing I want more than that, and I would give it all up for you.” He said, his eyes searching for hers, his body moving closer to hers, his hands holding hers.

She shaked her head. She didn’t trust him.

“It’s so easy to say it.” Y/n replied.

“Yeah, let me show you” Brad pleaded, “I won’t let you down. Not again. I want to spend the rest of my life making you happy.”

By this moment, both of them were in tears. Y/n didn’t dare to look at him yet, because she knew once she saw his eyes sparkling with hope and adoration, she was done.

“I love you.” He whispered and took her inside his arms. Just by hugging her he felt as if the pieces were coming back together, as if she had never left. “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

She raised her eyes and found a pair of deep brown eyes already staring, brighter than the Milky Way, so she slowly leaned over, brushing her lips with his and then crashing them together.

[holyghostbws]

Why is your profile not loading for anyone? I can't see your account except through the browser

omg 😳 I honestly have no idea ): I didn’t even know about that until now you’re telling me

[holyghostbws]

Do you still accept requests?

hi babe 💖 yes, of course! my requests are open :)

[holyghostbws]

Hi babes 💖💖

So sorry for being MIA, a lot of things and changes have happened but I missed you and I’m here again✨

Feel free to send your requests, if you need something or want to talk to someone my DMs are always open for you, or even if you just want to gossip a little I’m so down to🫡💓

Here’s a long imagine and a headcanon for now :))

bye, see you soon! 💕 I’ll be reading you 👀