holy-the-hallucinations

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has this been done yet

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megalodons are fucking extinct, buddy.

cause this is something that pisses me off so much. i got three main things to say here, and i will not try to summarize, cause this is tumblr, i do what i want on here.

just give it a quick read

1. the evidence your seeing is fuckin fake.

hey y’all, welcome to section one. have you been seeing megolodon proof on the internet? cause it’s popular. chances are, what your seeing is either: a misidentified basking shark, or from a fuckass fake documentary by the discovery channel that staged megalodon proof. let me elaborate (threat)

misidentified basking shark-

basking sharks are the second largest shark in the world, behind the whale shark and the largest ever recorded was just over 40 feet (thats real big). contrary to whale sharks, which have a very particular shape, basking sharks have more of a traditional “shark” silhouette. this leads to people seeing BIG SHARK and immediately thinking megalodon, because people dont know their sharks. which is fair, i’m just informing y’all. basking sharks are filter feeders, part of what makes them able to be so big, and stay alive. you may notice that really really big sharks tend to be filter feeders, which ties into a point i’ll make later. so, if you ever see a BIG SHARK, especially from above, check if it’s a basking shark before jumping to conspiracy conclusions.

picture of a basking shark from above, for context.

fake ass documentary-

In 2013, the discovery channel (a channel reserved normally for science) aired a documentary called “megalodon: the monster shark lives”. the problem, is that the documentary was staged, in it’s entirety. the “scientists” were actors, and the evidence was created for the documentary. the only warning is that the documentary was faked, was a extremely quick warning that flashed across the screen in the beginning. since the film was treated as a documentary, people were quick to believe the “evidence” it provided. this is bad by itself, obviously, but is made worse by (you guessed it) THE INTERNET! Short form content, and posting clips of other things is like, the main form of media for people on the internet. many megalodon “proofs” are clips from the film, or its sequels chopped up and stuck in compilations. this mixed with the lack of

Alright, so. this means that there are two things you should do when you see megalodon evidence.

- take a closer look to make sure it aint just a basking shark

- take a look to see if it matches footage from megalodon: the monster shark lives.

dont get misled people. it’s real easy to be.

2. it isn’t physically possible for megalodons to sustain their life without us seeing them ALL THE FUCKING TIME.

basic fucking thinking skills here. big ass shark who needs to move all the time. burns alot of calories or the shark equivalent. needs to eat alot. needs to eat a lot of bigger things. you understand what i’m sayin?

people love to theorize about shit like:

“megalodons in the mariana trench”

“megalodons in the parts of the ocean we havent explored yet”

let me tell ya a little fun fact about both of those places.

THERE ISNT ANYTHING TO FUCKING EAT.

sure, stuff is there. tiny stuff, that could only fuel a megalodon for like, never? it would be biologically impossible for a megalodon to survive for 3.6 million years (at the lowest). say a megalodon was in the mariana trench 3.6 million years ago, it would not be able to sustain life, let alone survive for 3.6 MILLION YEARS in a ecosystem not built for it.

say a megalodon in the mariana trench SOMEHOW, SOMEWAY managed to evolve before it fucking died, the descendants of that megalodon in the mariana fucking trench/deep ocean would be so far from megalodon that it wouldn’t be recognizable.

so, basically. megalodons ate big shit on the surface. if there was ever a megalodon in the mariana trench/deep ocean, it’s dead.

big sharks, especially predators, are real hard to sustain. thats why the buggest modern sharks are filter feeders. also probably why great whites survived and megs didnt.

(also like, we’d see the whale carcasses if there was one just in the regular ocean. we’d also see it, cause like, big fucking shark. we see great whites all the time and they dont grow nearly as big, or eat nearly as much)

3. why are you buying into this shit?

seriously guys, why do you want to believe theres a big ass shark in the ocean so badly?

it doesn’t make any sense. all the conspiracies are all like

“the government is hiding shit from us”

i mean, yeah, probably.

BUT A FUCKING MEGALODON?

how? why?

listen, i know you want to believe your conspiracies, and it makes you feel better or whatever. it’s easier to have some big scary monster than the unknown. but for the love of god, do your research.

sharks are hated enough, the ocean is scary enough, and science is important. please. critical thinking.

pick a different conspiracy, like, idk, mothman.

stop with the misinformation, and the fear mongering, and the STUPID FUCKING TIKTOK VIDEOS. and maybe actually research this cool ass ancient shark? like, really.

anyways, if you want to talk about sharks or some shit, my asks are always open.

do your fucking research

-a very pissed shark enthusiast

(please ask me about sharks)

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My favorite Louis is barricade Louis

-all credits to photo owners

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You ever think about Abed, knowing about the Doppeldeaner but in such distress that he can't communicate it in a way that anyone takes seriously, being forced to go to a "psychiatrist" to avoid legal action, having that "psychiatrist" say he needed "a crazy amount of help", having to think he was going to be committed, and when it was all uncovered, knowing that Chang and that guy must've intentionally targeted him because he was the most vulnerable to that actually being believed about him? And he forgave Chang, he invited him into the group eventually, because he got that Chang was struggling mentally too. Cold hard unfeeling man ever /sarcasm

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btw jeff looking at britta

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happy halloween to the most legendary moment from hit sitcom nbc community

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The fact that destiel day and the election are on the same day is so funny to me and I’m not entirely sure why

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now stay with me cause I’m quite quick now five six seven eight one two three four five six seven eight and niall for the shimmy for the shimmy for the shimmy and zayn pirouette and louis do the splits and liam you stay exactly where you are because you are per. fect.

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i get that britta is the worst but can people stop being mean to her please and thank you.

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angel of the gourd

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i love love LOVE how troy is always so excited to be in abed's documentaries and looks directly at the cameras pretty often--especially since abed doesn't like it when others do, but is soft enough for troy to let him be the exception. especially in the changnesia documentary ep (s4ep6) when troy is excited to be with annie as "partner and houlihan" he gives the camera a thumbs up--and abed, who is holding the camera, gives him a thumbs up back?!?!?!?

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if you have any 1d friends, please give them MULTIPLE hugs. we need it. badly. ow.

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Shaking and trembling, we made it to another coffee and pumpkin season 🎃☕️ Prints available!

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actually jeff and britta are fucking great together okay. they're both terribly emotionally immature and the definition of toxic. i hate them so much. they base their entire personality on the way others perceive them (britta wants to be seen as good person, jeff wants to be seen as cool) but when push comes to shove they always back each other up. they're both losers and fucking pathetic and they have the two most fragile egos in the whole group. they're absolutely ridiculous, they can never feel compassion or empathy in a natural way and they're actually awful fucking people. i love them so much. i need them to be together forever but in a quarantine sort of situation

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and he’s right

jeff winger looks at this and goes "yeah, that's hot"

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I love that there’s an episode of community called advanced gay and it’s not even in the top three for gayest community episodes