hobbitcatproductions

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Huh. It’s been a while since I’ve posted anything here. Guess I should fix that. Yes, this is going to be a shameless excuse for me to talk about my DnD characters.

Few of my characters have gone through as many changes, appearance-wise, than my satyr bard Andromeda. She’s a College of Spirits bard (which I can’t wait for that subclass to become official in the new Ravenloft book) who recently....shall we say ‘acquired’ a tarokka deck.

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Send me an AU and I'll tell you what my muse would be like in that AU.

(EX: Send ‘Angel AU’ and I’ll tell you what my muse would be like in an angel au)

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❛❛ Seriously, that was your best idea? ❜❜ 

❛❛ I didn’t know what I was expected. ❜❜ 

❛❛ How humanity survived so long is a mystery to me. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I’m surrounded by idiots. ❜❜ 

❛❛ How are you going to explain this shit away? ❜❜ 

❛❛ What is wrong with you- No, what is right with you? ❜❜ 

❛❛ And you just had to leave the body on my carpet? ❜❜ 

❛❛ I keep screaming but no one hears me. ❜❜ 

❛❛ Each time your mouth opens all that comes out is the sound of Mr. Bean. ❜❜ 

❛❛ It takes time and patience to be a good person, neither of which I have enough off. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I tried to tell you not to, but like, not too loud. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I just woke up and I’m already going back to bed. ❜❜ 

❛❛ You haven’t choked on your tongue, that on itself is surprising. ❜❜ 

❛❛ There’s nothing I hate more than everything. ❜❜ 

❛❛ Maybe I was the idiot for aligning myself with you guys. ❜❜ 

❛❛ Is that blood? I swear to god if the feds show up again- ❜❜ 

❛❛ What the fuck do you want me to do? ❜❜ 

❛❛ You fucked your way into this, and you’re gonna have to unfuck yourself. ❜❜ 

❛❛ You’re being nice, so where is the body and get the shovel. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I was a good kid, how did I end up with you fuckers. ❜❜ 

❛❛ Yeah, I knew that was going to end up badly. I just needed to watch it happen. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I’m not even going to comment. ❜❜ 

❛❛ Oh, for fuck’s sake. ❜❜ 

❛❛ What did you do now? ❜❜ 

❛❛ That breaks several international laws, state laws, country laws, and nautical laws. ❜❜ 

❛❛ As long as you drop everything and focus on me, I should be fine. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I don’t like this, so I’m going to bed. ❜❜ 

❛❛ People in the dark ages had this figured out, but no. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I’m going nowhere near any kids, polio is too hip and cool among parents for my tastes. ❜❜ 

❛❛ What are you doing? Why are you touching me? No. Help. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I don’t like what your thinking and I don’t even know what it is. ❜❜ 

❛❛ That’s enough emotions for today, goodnight. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I have depression and I’m depressed, Karen. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I can smell the bullshit coming out of your mouth. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I’ll find out what you’re hiding, and when I do, I’ll be really pissed. ❜❜ 

❛❛ Did you just now figure it out? ❜❜

❛❛ Their evil plan wasn’t even that complicated yet it completely went through you? ❜❜ 

❛❛ Are you even listening to me? ❜❜ 

❛❛ What are you waiting for, a formal invitation? ❜❜ 

❛❛ We’re not friends, I just need you alive. ❜❜ 

❛❛ Do you even know what a book is? A b-o-o-k. ❜❜ 

❛❛ Are you dumb, or did you just drink a bottle of horse tranquilizer? ❜❜ 

❛❛ Common sense is the sixth sense you’re all missing. ❜❜  

❛❛ Look at me, look into the face of a broken person. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I don’t hate you as much as I do others, that’s it. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I don’t know why you woke me up, I was busy playing girl. ❜❜ 

❛❛ Please remove me as your emergency contact, my phone won’t stop ringing. ❜❜ 

❛❛ You’re not dead so it clearly worked. ❜❜ 

❛❛ Why would I do that- This better be good coffee. ❜❜ 

❛❛ I’m going to regret this, but I would miss you if you died. ❜❜ 

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                                                Caring Edition 

‘ Hey when was the last time you slept? ’

‘ Stay in bed, please. ’

‘ Do you want me to get you anything? ’

‘ Let me look. ’

‘ Let me help you. ’

‘ Here, let me bandage that up. ’

‘ I made you something to eat. ’

‘ You’re burning up! Go lay down. ’

‘ Please drink more water. ’

‘ Were you able to keep that down? ’

‘ Does this hurt? ’

‘ You need to stay still. ’

‘ Want more blankets? ’

‘ Do you want to talk about it? ’

‘ Try to breathe slowly. ’

‘ It’s alright I’m here. ’

‘ Here hold my hand. ’

‘ I’m not going anywhere. ’

‘ You can sleep here. ’

‘ Rest as long as you need. ’

‘ Look at me. ’

‘ Tell me what you are seeing. ’

‘ You can rest in my arms. ’

‘ I will make you some tea. ’

‘ Please, take this. ’

‘ You should be resting. ’

‘ I’m just checking in, how are you feeling? ’

‘ Snuggling helps with a lot of things, so come here. ’

‘ Want me to take you to a doctor? ’

‘ I am a doctor, so please listen to me. ’

‘ How long have you been like this? ’

[hobbitcatproductions]

And now for something a little different, meet my DnD character. Selenia Barkhollow is a halfling bardbarian (College of Lore, no primal path yet) and wielder of a magic pan flute. If you’d like to read more about her story, click here.

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Soft Sentence Starters

bc i need inspiration

“I’ll protect you.”

“You always duck away when you smile.”

“Like I expected, you’re much comfier than my pillow.”

“I’m nervous too.”

“Do you like it?”

“Let me hug you.”

“Piggy back ride?”

“I want to kiss all of the freckles on your cute face.”

“Can you keep holding my hand, please?”

“Wait, the tears are good tears?”

“I think you look cuter with me.”

“I won’t forget this moment.”

“This is where we first met isn’t it?”

“I’ve always wanted to thank you, but was never sure how.”

“If you’re happy then okay.”

“Let’s share.”

“It wouldn’t be the same without you.”

“Everything ends up being about you somehow.”

“It tastes like…. You tried…. I’ll eat it. It’s a good attempt. Really.”

“Why are you hiding against me like this?”

“I heard you weren’t having that great of a day… These are your favorite candies, right?”

“Ah, the puppy dog face. Check mate, huh?”

“Quit poking my sides; you know I’m ticklish!”

“Your hair is sticking out everywhere. Cute.” 

“Wait, let me get a picture of you there.”

“If you need my shoulder, or my hand, or a hug-”

“Kiss me again.”

“I’m sorry, but it was too funny for me to intervene.”

“It doesn’t matter what they think, I just care about what you think.”

“You can ask me as much as you want, I’ll say I love you each time.”

“I’m glad you were here with me.” 

“That trip looked hilarious– but also kinda painful; you okay?”

“I called you because I can’t fall asleep.”

“I let you win.”

“You look good in it.”

“Don’t look away from me.”

“I’m not jealous, I’m just practicing my pout.”

“I just want to hug you.”

“You’ve kissed me like fifty times today.”

“You love me.”

“Can we be alone for a bit?”

“The stars wish they were as bright as you.”

“You make me cliche, but I love it I guess.”

“I’d feel better if you kissed me.”

“You’re overthinking– I’m yours. That’s all I want to be.”

“You’re my favorite.”

“You want to take another selfie?”

“I’d let you if you asked.”

“Since it’s you, I’m gonna let it go.”

“My only regret is not telling you I loved you sooner.”

send a sentence and a name!! x

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“I’m the oldest which means I’m always right.” With The Wolf Pack

“I’m the oldest which means I’m always right.”

“You’re only the oldest by a few months at most,” Daniel pointed out.

“Also? I can think of a few times when you were definitely not ‘always right’,” Pitt quipped. Ayano laughed, waving a dismissive hand.

“Okok, maybe not ‘always’, but I am right about this. It’s been entirely too long since we closed the shop early to do something fun.”

“So...uh....what is it that we’re doing again?” Bright asked, eyeing the setup before them. The four of them had gathered in the living room, sitting around the coffee table. In front of himself, Pitt, and Daniel were a couple sheets of paper, while Ayano had the far end of the table hidden behind a folded-out screen. Also on the table were dice of varying shapes and colors (none of them really matching).

“It’s a game that my dad and the other techs at Dal-Tech used to play on their days off,” Ayano explained, “Each person has a character, and each character has different stuff they can do. I made one for each of you.”

“And the dice?” Pitt asked, “Also, what do all of these boxes on the sheet mean?”

“Each one is for a different thing. I’ll explain as we go.”

“If only the three of us have characters, what does that make you, then?” Daniel asked, looking up from his character sheet.

“I’m the one who narrates the story,” was the cheerful response, “Ok, so, our story begins in a tavern on the outskirts of the city...”

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“Please, just come home.” With The Wolf Pack

((Notes from the HobbitCat- Another entry from Ayano’s earlier years))

“Please, just come home.”

Ayano’s lip curled in a sneer as she listened to the radio broadcast. Yet another plea from Victor Dalca, begging for his wife’s safe return. He sounded sincere enough and, were she anyone else, she probably would have believed it. And yet...

“You alright, Sparks?” Cadmus asked, looking up from the glass he was polishing.

“...y-yeah, why?” she mumbled.

“You suddenly look like you ate a bad lemon,” he pointed out. Glancing between her and the ongoing broadcast, he reached over to turn off the radio. Only then, he noticed, did her posture relax. For a moment, he thought about asking. About ever-so-gently prying for information. Instead, though, he merely remarked, “Jackass must’ve done something pretty shitty for his wife to go running off on him.”

“What I’ve heard of the guy, I’m sure she had her reasons,” was all Ayano said as she resumed mopping the floor.

“Well, wherever she went, she’s much better off without that asshole.”

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“It would be better with fire.” With The Wolf Pack

“This would be better with fire,” Ayano muttered, adding after a pause, “And marshmallows.”

“A lot of things would be better with fire, according to you,” Bright pointed out with a wry grin, “I’ll be damned if we actually end up having to camp out here, though.”

They’d been coming up on the end of a very long drive when the buggy started sputtering. Though neither of them felt good about having to stop when the sun had already gone down, they had no choice. With only the moon and Ayano’s ever-burning sparkler (held overhead as she sat on the roof) to see by, Bright tried to assess and repair the engine as best he could.

“Should I call the cubs and let them know we’re gonna be a bit later than we thought?” Ayano asked.

“Nah. That’ll just worry them. Besides, we only told them we’d be back before midnight, and it’s nowhere near midnight yet.”

“Fair enough.”

Nearly 30 minutes passed before Bright finally lowered the hood and looked up. “That should do it. Or, if nothing else, it’ll get us home.”

“The way both of us drive this thing, I’m surprised it only just now started to act up,” Ayano mused, sliding off the roof and into the passenger seat in one fluid motion.

Packing up the emergency toolkit and depositing it in the back, Bright went around to climb into the driver’s seat. “I’ll look at it more closely in the morning, just in case this wasn’t just a one-time thing.”

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“I swear, if you try and sneak out before you’re fully healed, I’ll strap you to the bed.”

“I swear, if you try and sneak out before you’re fully healed, I’ll strap you to the bed.”

Daniel paused halfway out of bed, looking over at the door. He smirked. “I’d say you wouldn’t, but I know you too well.”

“So get your ass back in bed, Pretty Boy,” Ayano quipped, leaning against the door frame, “You lost a lotta blood, and I worked too damn hard making sure you could keep your leg for you to fuck it up.”

“I know, I know,” he relented, leaning back against the bed. He winced, trying to pull his injured leg back up onto the small mountain of pillows it had been propped up onto.

Ayano made her way into the room, carefully helping him rest his leg on the pillows. “I *could* very easily build you a new leg if the worst happens, but I’d rather not have to. It’s also entirely beside the much bigger point of ‘I’ve now almost lost all three of you’.”

“Oh, c’mon, it wasn’t that bad...”

She said nothing. She merely stared at him. Daniel sighed after a moment.

“Ok, it was, but...”

Ayano leaned over and kissed his forehead. “Rest. Take it easy for a few days. We’re good on scrap and I can do supply runs if needed.”

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Recovering from injury sentence starters

1. “You’re in no condition to be walking around. Just stay in bed and let me take care of you.” 

2. “This cast is itchy.” 

3. “I think I’m going to go crazy with boredom before my _____ heal(s) enough for me to get out of bed.” 

4. “This is so frustrating! I can’t do anything with my arm in this sling!” 

5. “Want me to sign your cast?” 

6. “Sorry about your ______. But think of it this way: you don’t have to help with the chores until it/they heal(s).” 

7. “No, you can’t come. You need to stay here and heal.” 

8. “I thought a little fresh air would help you/me heal.” 

9. “Need some help? Getting up/down the stairs must be tricky with that/those injured ______.” 

10. “You shouldn’t be moving around so much. You’ll pop your stitches.” 

11. “I can’t believe you’re making me stay here just because I hurt my ______.” 

12. “Back off! Just because I’m hurt doesn’t mean I need you hovering over me all the time.” 

13. “Just because you’re hurt doesn’t mean you need to be so grouchy.” 

14. “Are you still on pain meds? You’re awfully happy for someone with an injured ______.” 

15. “This is embarrassing, but could you help me? I can’t get the bathroom by myself.” 

16. “Don’t even think about trying to walk with that injured leg. If you need something, call me and I’ll do it for you.”  

17. “Good thing I’m a lazy person. Except for the fact that my ______ is/are broken, laying around for a few weeks sounds great.”

18. “I swear, if you try and sneak out before you’re fully healed, I’ll strap you to the bed.” 

19. “What are you doing? Are you trying to make your injury worse?” 

20. “I feel like such a jerk, lying here on the couch while you do all the work. Injured or not, I should be doing something.” 

21. “I can’t believe I have to lay like this until my _____ heal(s). This is so humiliating.”

22. “Once I’m healed, I am never getting injured again. This is all just too inconvenient for a repeat performance.”  

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“You are very endearing when you are half-asleep.” with The Wolf Pack

“You are very endearing when you are half-asleep,” Bright teased.

“Then I must be goddamn delight most nights,” Ayano muttered grumpily, hugging her knees to her chest as she looked up at him.

“You genuinely are,” he reassured, reaching for something at her feet. A familiar stack of papers, crinkled and half-crumpled from being read a million times over. “You finally done with this shit? Got all of it committed to memory for whatever reason you were trying to accomplish?”

“...I think so, yeah...”

“Good. C’mon.” Papers in hand, Bright turned and strode out of the room. Curious, Ayano followed him. By the time she caught up, he was already halfway to the fire pit behind the workshop.

“This should’ve been done a long time ago,” Bright pointed out, grabbing an oil can and dumping a small amount into the pit, “You wanna do the honors, or shall I?”

“Got a match?” she asked. She smirked as he handed her a handheld blowtorch. “Even better.” One by one, she lit the corner of each paper in the stack, letting them float down into the pit. Once the last paper had been dropped in, she stayed and watched the small blaze. Gradually, as the warmth from the fire washed over her, her eyelids began to droop. Bright caught her as she wobbled.

“Alright, back to bed with you. You’ll probably sleep better now that that’s all over.”

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“No matter how much it hurts, you have to be quiet.” With The Wolf Pack

“No matter how much it hurts, you have to be quiet,” Ayano muttered, her gaze diverted out the only intact window of the building. Daniel sat on the floor at her feet, sweat dripping down his face as he leaned against the wall. Outside, both could hear creatures prowling in the darkness.

“Guess this is why Pitt was dead set against us coming out here,” he muttered, trying to inspect the damage to his leg. With only the moon and the glow from his gauntlet, though, it was all-but impossible to see much beyond the slowly growing bloodstain centered around his ankle.

“Heyheyhey! Quit poking at it,” she admonished. The noise caught the attention of something outside, which slammed against the wall. Quickly, Ayano dropped away from the window to kneel beside Daniel. Light soon filled the room as she pulled out and activated the sparkler she kept for navigating through fog. Both Ayano and Daniel winced at what they could see of the damage through the claw marks in Daniel’s pant leg.

“I radioed the others, so they should hopefully be here soon,” Ayano whispered as, handing the sparkler to Daniel and began digging through his pack for the med kit, “In the meantime, walk me through this.”

“It probably looks worse than it actually is...” Daniel started to say. As he tried to shift so he could see the wound better, though, pain shot through his leg all the way up to the hip. He bit his tongue to keep from yelling.

“Stop. Moving. I know you’re supposed to be the medic of this group, but tonight you get to pass your knowledge onto me.”

Daniel went silent for a moment before he gave a resigned sigh. “Alright...it needs to be cleaned and wrapped. Everything you need should be in the kit.”

Ayano nodded, removing her gloves and handing them to him. “Here. Bite down on these if the pain gets worse.”

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Drinking starters

as requested by @ambitionbled (it won’t let me tag you, sorry!)

CONCERN.

❝How much have you had to drink?❞

❝You could have fucking alcohol poisoning!❞  

❝Easy, there. Try to sit up.❞

❝I think I might’ve overdone it on the alcohol…❞

❝We’ve got to go get your stomach pumped.❞

❝I thought you said you were clean!❞

❝Yes, it is a big deal.❞

❝Let me drive you home.❞

❝You are NOT driving like this!❞

❝You are gonna have one hell of a hangover tomorrow.❞

❝Drinking until you puke is not normal.❞

DRUNK.

❝Is this real life?❞ 

❝I want to go to sleep but I can’t find any sheep.❞

❝How do you show fish affection?❞

❝Taco Bell is open 24 hours, right?❞

❝Tequila is not my friend? YOU’RE not my friend.❞

❝Drunk I am not.❞

-glasses on head- ❝Where did I put my glasses?❞

❝How do I tell my parents I’m a mermaid?❞ 

❝I’m not even tired.❞

❝I should call my ex.❞

❝I’m not drunk enough for this.❞

❝Does playing Mario Kart drunk count as drunk driving?❞

-hugging the floor- ❝I’m trying to stop the floor from spinning.❞

❝Can we go out for fried chicken?❞

ANGST.

❝What’s the fucking point anymore?❞

❝Screw recovery. I want a drink.❞

❝I’m too sober for this shit.❞ 

❝I don’t give a shit what you think.❞

❝I seriously don’t feel too good.❞

❝I didn’t even have that much to drink.❞

❝Will you stop fucking interrogating me?❞

❝I can drive. I’m fine.❞

❝There’s a reason I drink so much.❞

❝You’re the reason I drink so much.❞

❝I’m only happy when I’m drunk.❞

FLUFF/FUN.

❝You’re cute, you know that?❞ 

❝You wanna get wasted?❞

❝I’m bar-hopping tonight, wanna come?❞

❝What are you drinking, and why aren’t you sharing?❞

❝I’m having a party for two.❞

❝You’re so hot.❞

❝I’m usually too chicken-shit to say this, but…I really like you.❞

❝I don’t want to kiss you with your alcohol breath.❞

*kisses on forehead*

*kisses on cheek*

*kisses on lips*

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send me questions you have about my character!

anything and everything. favorites. thoughts on people, on events. what they would do in a certain situation. how things would be different if something had/hadn’t happened. simple questions, complex questions. have at it!

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      critical role campaign 2 starter meme (feel free to only use part of the starters or reword & replace words/pronouns however you like)

episode 2 [part 1/3]

“Or that. I guess we also do that.”

“We’re already loopy, what could possibly go wrong?”

“Nerd is chic, now.”

“I like to think I was always cool.”

“I have a counter-offer.”

“Oh, are you waiting for me to speak?”

“About fucking time, you little shit!”

“[Her] accent is really, really strong; it’s hard to not match [her] accent!”

“Thank you. For the record, I don’t owe any of you anything, we’re square, but thank you.”

“I’m ready to help with this.”

“Help. Help. Helphelphelp help help helphelphelphelphelphelphelp. Help. Help.”

“Oh, I thought you didn’t like jail.”

“This does not really fall in with keeping a low profile, we talked about this.”

“Smells like [Caleb] down here.”

“Oh, no, are you guys making fun of her because of her spasm?”

“Opportunity missed.”

“So, great! We’re stuck in a city that has zombie issues, that’s all.”

“You and I have to make some decisions right now.”

“You and I meeting and teaming up has been a good thing.”

“The people we spent the day with are lunatics.”

“We’ve got people staring at us every second of the day, we need to dial it back a little bit.”

“All right, we can cool it with the cons for a couple days.”

“Should we pretend we’re still friends with these people?”

“Don’t worry, I’ll turn on the charm.”

“I would like a round for all of these terrible people, and one for myself.”

“Yes, I would love to see something cool.”

“I’ve been an artist since I was little!”

“I’ve seen a LOT of dicks, okay. That is what MOST of them look like.”

“I’m from the circus.”

“You have a lot of scars.”

“You did some crazy shit with those swords of yours.”

“My mother always said, ‘Never give a story away for free’.”

“My mother always said never give away other things for free.”

“I already like your mother.”

“Yeah, I can tell.”

“I have sticky fingers, I can’t help myself sometimes.”

“That is a moving story.”

“Oh, I don’t care about the people who have ‘em, I just like pretty things.”

“Steal something from me! Do you want me to close my eyes?”