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The worst type of crises are the quiet ones

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Old Fashioned by Bruno Major

I know it’s not very cool Standing here, serenading like a fool But I don’t care I’ll gladly be a fool for you

I know the idea isn’t new To fall in love with someone on first view But I don’t care I think I’ll fall in love with you

I’ll put on my Sunday best You pick out your favorite dress I’ll take you somewhere new I’ll be old fashioned for you

It’s a cliché, or so I’m told To give your jacket up to someone when it’s cold But I don’t care I don’t mind the midnight air Oh, oh

I’ll walk you home, to your front door I’ll say, “Farewell”, until the morning calls I’ll be smiling a bigger smile than before

I’ll put on my Sunday best You pick out your favorite dress I’ll take you somewhere new

I’ll put on my Sunday best You pick out your favorite dress I’ll take you somewhere new I’ll be old fashioned for you

[hnhk]

Grieving

The recent passing of a dear friend has brought me a lot of reflection. Along with it, shame and sorrow.

Shame

My biggest regret is not having been a friend, in the simplest definition of the term. There is a hint of blame, but what strikes the hardest is the shame for my egotism.

Spending time with those who energize me is great; decidedly not spending time with others despite the clear identification that they need someone, anyone, is essentially shameful.

It’s not just that I wasn’t a friend; I wasn’t even a good human being. A good human being would have asked questions. A good human being wouldn’t have ignored any suspicion. A good human being would have been there. Not because she is a friend, a person I hold dear, but because every single life is important.

I was living my relationships based on the lie that the lives that matter are those that make me feel good, comfortable. But the shame of buring a friend made it clear that I never want to bury another person for the same reasons ever again.

Certainly, there is so much I can do; I know. The reflection isn’t that I can save lives, but rather that there is something I can do (just as there is something anyone can do). And in the end, freedom is in each person’s hand, but everyone deserves a chance to live.

Sorrow

I mourn every day. Just as God’s grace renews every morning, the sorrow of losing her renews with every sunrise. And I don’t think the sadness will ever go away.

The pain of losing someone that deeply loved life, who easily opened a smile at the sight (or thought) of new adventures, cracked up at the silliest jokes, and never lost a chance to make others laugh won’t ever dissipate. And a part of me wants to hold onto this pain so that I never forget what she taught me in the fullness of her life.

Only now do I realize the difficulty of grieving; there isn’t anything that can truly comfort those who grieve. Hopefully, it will just become easier with every morning, a little bit less unbearable, but never letting me forget about the egocentric reflection I saw that day.

[hnhk]

September 07, 2018 at 06:37PM 조타

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August 23, 2018 at 12:17AM É uma fofura que não posso conter. Te amo, Sabrina! Parabéns pelos 21 anos, irmãzinha linda do meu coração! Seja sempre essa mulher com muita garra e delicadeza; forte e dócil; sábia e humilde. Poucas são as que conseguem usufruir desse equilíbrio que você leva com tanta leveza! E, por favor, continue sempre sendo essa garotinha que morro de vontade de apertaaaaar 🤗.

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But no matter the medicinal virtues of being a true friend or sustaining a long close relationship with another, the ultimate touchstone of friendship is not improvement, neither of the other nor of the self, the ultimate touchstone is witness, the privilege of having been seen by someone and the equal privilege of being granted the sight of the essence of another, to have walked with them and to have believed in them, and sometimes just to have accompanied them for however brief a span, on a journey impossible to accomplish alone.

David Whyte in “Consolations”

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Showing hesitation or awkwardness means you are thinking of yourself, as opposed to being overwhelmed by the victim's charms.

Robert Greene

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And strangely enough, the more a woman asks for, the worthier she seems.

Robert Greene

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No one is more seductive than the person who has had a brush with death.

The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene

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Therefore in my view when the courtier wishes to declare his love he should do so by his actions rather than by speech, for a man's feelings are sometimes more clearly revealed by a gesture of respect or a certain shyness than by volume of words.

Baldassare Castiglione

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July 29, 2018 at 08:02PM Perfeito, esse "pouco diferente".

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July 28, 2018 at 08:28AM

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July 14, 2018 at 11:49AM "Vamos descansar lá em cima!" Nunca vou esquecer dessa frase, @julieahn96! Obrigada por ser essa amiga que sempre me motiva e me ensina a ser uma pessoa melhor.

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Some things are worth preserving not for any utilitarian reason, but because they're intrisically wonderful.

Olivia Goldhill in Quartz Obsession article on Pandas

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New York November 10, 1958 Dear Thom: We had your letter this morning. I will answer it from my point of view and of course Elaine will from hers. First — if you are in love — that’s a good thing — that’s about the best thing that can happen to anyone. Don’t let anyone make it small or light to you. Second — There are several kinds of love. One is a selfish, mean, grasping, egotistical thing which uses love for self-importance. This is the ugly and crippling kind. The other is an outpouring of everything good in you — of kindness and consideration and respect — not only the social respect of manners but the greater respect which is recognition of another person as unique and valuable. The first kind can make you sick and small and weak but the second can release in you strength, and courage and goodness and even wisdom you didn’t know you had. You say this is not puppy love. If you feel so deeply — of course it isn’t puppy love. But I don’t think you were asking me what you feel. You know better than anyone. What you wanted me to help you with is what to do about it — and that I can tell you. Glory in it for one thing and be very glad and grateful for it. The object of love is the best and most beautiful. Try to live up to it. If you love someone — there is no possible harm in saying so — only you must remember that some people are very shy and sometimes the saying must take that shyness into consideration. Girls have a way of knowing or feeling what you feel, but they usually like to hear it also. It sometimes happens that what you feel is not returned for one reason or another — but that does not make your feeling less valuable and good. Lastly, I know your feeling because I have it and I’m glad you have it. We will be glad to meet Susan. She will be very welcome. But Elaine will make all such arrangements because that is her province and she will be very glad to. She knows about love too and maybe she can give you more help than I can. And don’t worry about losing. If it is right, it happens — The main thing is not to hurry. Nothing good gets away. Love, Fa

John Steinbeck in “Steinbeck: A Life in Letters”

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Learning how to stay small & live frugally is a valuable skill because increased spending tends to suffer from lifestyle creep – you buy, own and consume more stuff but there's only a minimal effect on your long-term quality of life.

Charles Chu

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May 26, 2018 at 07:37AM A gente estava tão feliz aqui, né @saabrinakim? A gente achava que esse era o topo, o fim, mas era apenas o comecinho do comecinho. Cogitamos trocentas vezes se deveríamos dar a meia volta, mas ainda bem que não desistimos! A sede, fome, frio, calor, tênis com areia, tênis com neve, vontade de fazer xixi... Tudo valeu muito a pena e faria de novo!