hivemindofevilbats

[hivemindofevilbats]

i think the reason why the assassination of Julius Caesar is one of the funniest political assassinations is for this very simple reason:

1 guy stabs 1 guy: not funny. that's murder.

2 guys stab 1 guy: even less funny. that's two against one.

60 guys stab 1 guy: uproariously funny. why do you need so many guys.

[hivemindofevilbats]

Types of brain fog:

Brain is primordial sludge & you are drowning in it

U are a ghost and nothing is real

Mental equivalent of attempting to stream some high-res video game when all you have is dial-up

The thing you want to articulate is *right there* but you're just scrabbling at it like a cat continually failing to catch the bird on the other side of the window

The Void

[hivemindofevilbats]

if i were a high school teacher and found out one of my students was vaping weed in the back of the class on the regular i'd make a group chat with every other student there and message them "at 1:15pm everyone turn around in your seat and stare at chris while i say a prayer in latin then walk out of the room in a single file line crying" and i'd be teacher of the year

[hivemindofevilbats]

Abolish Tesla.

[hivemindofevilbats]

being held would be so cool. wish physical touch was real

[hivemindofevilbats]

vent

i'm kinda worried i have a pretty deep cut (by my standards, idk about anyone else) on my thigh and it's not done healing like fully scabbing over and i'm going swimming tmr and i googled it and apparantly the chlorine water won't hurt more than normal water but i might get an infection? also the act of swimming might pull it open and i would really rather not but i can't tell my dad to cancel the lesson but i'm kinda scared

[hivemindofevilbats]

Something that I get chills about is the fact that the oldest story told made by the oldest civilization opens with "In those days, in those distant days, in those ancient nights."

This confirms that there is a civilization older than the Sumerians that we have yet to find

Some people get existential dread from this

Me? I think it's fucking awesome it shows just how much of this world we have yet to discover and that is just fascinating

[hivemindofevilbats]

[hivemindofevilbats]

Reasons I am now less stressed:

i have now done a VERY ROUGH draft and rehearsed my excuses for the teacher in my head

also my bf has stopped texting me so either he's prolly asleep

still cannot find nighttime headphones but i am not as stressed so i may be able to sleep

will almost certainly not be hungover tmr unless something bad happens later tonight

on second thought the tests tmr aren't actually that hard and i know (most) of the stuff

i think i was just working myself up over not much

AN INCOMPLETE LIST OF REASONS I AM CURRENTLY VERY STRESSED:

Can't find nighttime headphones

Can't sleep without nighttime headphones

2 tests tmr morning

its is currently nearly midnight (8 am test tmr) (can't sleep without headphones) (can't find headphones)

May or may not be hungover tmr (8 am test) (another test after that) (need theses tests to keep up my average)

Draft to be handed in tmr (have not written the draft) (11:30 pm) (need to sleep to do tests tmr) (can't disappoint teacher) (still can't find headphones) (need to sleep)

Bf is stressed about his oral presentation tmr (he is telling me about it) (he's not doing anything about it) (i can't help) (he's not working on it and i can't work on it for him)

Have an email to send (should have been sent months ago)

[hivemindofevilbats]

people who dont experience it cannot comprehend how awful executive dysfunction is. I WANT to do the task, i have the resources TO do the task, i will feel better having DONE the task

but i cant fucking do the task

[hivemindofevilbats]

This doesn't apply to me because my strategies are quite simple and get put in place before things start to go wrong and then if i forget that's when everything either goes to shit or starts to get elabor- oh

[hivemindofevilbats]

tumblr staff finding out their site has crowdsourced a viral song, only to discover it is 100% unusable in any corporate marketing scenario

[hivemindofevilbats]

okay so I know slur song was banned from the club chart BUT fun fact: to make it into the lower end of the itunes charts you only need to sell like 50 songs in a day so if you have 50 friends with a dollar to spare and an iphone ... well

omg that would be so funny. I definitely don't have 50 friends I could expose this song to but thankyouuuuu!

[hivemindofevilbats]

AN INCOMPLETE LIST OF REASONS I AM CURRENTLY VERY STRESSED:

Can't find nighttime headphones

Can't sleep without nighttime headphones

2 tests tmr morning

its is currently nearly midnight (8 am test tmr) (can't sleep without headphones) (can't find headphones)

May or may not be hungover tmr (8 am test) (another test after that) (need theses tests to keep up my average)

Draft to be handed in tmr (have not written the draft) (11:30 pm) (need to sleep to do tests tmr) (can't disappoint teacher) (still can't find headphones) (need to sleep)

Bf is stressed about his oral presentation tmr (he is telling me about it) (he's not doing anything about it) (i can't help) (he's not working on it and i can't work on it for him)

Have an email to send (should have been sent months ago)

[hivemindofevilbats]

Sticky hand wall update

[hivemindofevilbats]

Honest Government Ad | Our Last Fair Election

[hivemindofevilbats]

sometimes i feel like im climing up this incline again alone but thankully sisypus and the itsy bitsy spider and here with me