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I HAVE MOVED

you can now find me over at @ofcrownedmercy

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effy needs to interact with evie’s tbh... bc like highkey they’d be half sisters and i need it

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( voiidcd: )

FLIGHTLESS. so i haven’t been here in a couple days, but between work and going to the gym with my mum ( i am kicking butt at the gym you guys i’m so proud of myself ) AND also being back with part of my og rp squad from years back has just been nuts. i’ll try to be on tomorrow and part of this weekend, thanks for sticking around everyone!!

gym life is hard life, but you gotta hustle harder!! also... yes hi facebook rp is brilliant and underrated i missed it so much. og squad for life !!

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aurora lyric starters

because i’m bored/avoiding drafts have some song lyric starters from all my demons greeting me as a friend by aurora! important things to note: there are many sad/depressing tones to these lyrics; and some of these have added/changed words

RUNAWAY

❛ i was listening to the ocean ❜ ❛ i had a dream i was seven ❜ ❛ i saw a piece of heaven waiting for me ❜ ❛ i was dancing in the rain ❜ ❛ i felt alive and i can’t complain ❜ ❛ take me home where i belong ❜ ❛ i can’t take it anymore ❜ ❛ i was painting a picture ❜ ❛ for a moment i thought you were here ❜ ❛ all this time i have been lying ❜

CONQUEROR

❛ i’ve been looking for the conqueror ❜ ❛ i’ve been looking for the only one ❜ ❛ you don’t seem to come my way ❜ ❛ you are broken too ❜ ❛ i feel alive ❜

RUNNING WITH THE WOLVES

❛ don’t you know we’re stronger now? ❜ ❛ my heart still beats ❜ ❛ my skin still feels ❜ ❛ my lungs still breathe ❜ ❛ my mind still fears ❜ ❛ we’re running out of time ❜

LUCKY

❛ when i’m down i lay my hands on the ground ❜ ❛ this earth is mine ❜ ❛ remember all the faces that i’ve seen ❜ ❛ all the marks have settled on my skin ❜ ❛ i feel the light for the very first time ❜ ❛ not anybody knows that i am lucky to be alive ❜ ❛ there’s a war inside my mind ❜ ❛ i feel too numb to even mind ❜ ❛ i don’t know where i am ❜ ❛ what lies behind makes no sense in my mind ❜ ❛ i know that it’s time to let go ❜

WINTER BIRD

❛ will they wake up again? ❜ ❛ do they sleep? ❜ ❛ do they dream? ❜ ❛ hear the winter bird sing– ❜ ❛ i can see the air i breathe ❜ ❛ all i need is to remember how it was to feel alive ❜ ❛ we were dancing again, in a dream by the lake ❜ ❛ rest against my pillow ❜ ❛ i wake each morning to remember that you’re gone ❜ ❛ i need to remember ❜

I WENT TOO FAR

❛ i went too far ❜ ❛ i was begging on my knees ❜ ❛ i went too far and kissed the ground beneath your feet ❜ ❛ give me some love ❜ ❛ hold me tight ❜ ❛ i cut my hands ❜ ❛ why can’t i turn around and walk away? ❜ ❛ i’ll have to turn around and walk away❜ ❛ i couldn’t stay ❜ ❛ i had to walk away ❜ ❛ everything i am is gone ❜ ❛ i’m trying to reach for another soul ❜

THROUGH THE EYES OF A CHILD

❛ the world is covered by our trails ❜ ❛ watch them preach in sour lies ❜ ❛ i would rather see this world through the eyes of a child ❜ ❛ darker times will come and go ❜ ❛ mother’s hearts are warm and mild ❜ ❛ i would rather feel this world through the skin of a child ❜ ❛ when a human strokes your skin, that is when you let them in ❜ ❛ let them in before they go ❜ ❛ i would rather feel alive with a childlike soul ❜ ❛ please don’t leave me here ❜

WARRIOR

❛ i fall asleep in my own tears ❜ ❛ i’m crying for the world ❜ ❛ i can’t recall the last time i opened my eyes ❜ ❛ i build a cage to hide in ❜ ❛ i’m trying to battle the night ❜ ❛ let love conquer your mind ❜ ❛ just reach out for the light ❜ ❛ i am a warrior of love ❜ ❛ i’m fighting my way through ❜ ❛ underneath a darkened sky there’s a light kept alive ❜

MURDER SONG ( 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 )

❛ i close my eyes and bang i am dead ❜ ❛ i know he knows ❜ ❛ he’s killing me for mercy ❜ ❛ he didn’t mean to do no harm ❜ ❛ her did it all to spare me from the awful things in life ❜ ❛ here i go ❜ ❛ 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 ❜ ❛ the gun is gone ❜

HOME

❛ lost in the moment again? ❜ ❛ the road has no end ❜ ❛ one day life will be kind ❜ ❛ we are not alive ❜ ❛ we are surviving ❜ ❛ we are home ❜ ❛ we’re forcing the light into our veins ❜ ❛ we’re keeping the hope in our minds ❜ ❛ doesn’t really matter where you came from ❜ ❛ i feel warm again ❜ ❛ i’m reborn again ❜ ❛ i’m fine? ❜

UNDER THE WATER

❛ we can’t breathe ❜ ❛ under the water we die ❜ ❛ there is no one watching ❜ ❛ we are alone ❜ ❛ why don’t we jump in? ❜ ❛ where did they fall? ❜ ❛ what do they see? ❜ ❛ wash away the sins ❜ ❛ feet won’t fail you now ❜ ❛ arms won’t let you down ❜ ❛ we can’t be together ❜

HALF THE WORLD AWAY

❛ i would like to leave this city ❜ ❛ this old town don’t smell too pretty ❜ ❛ i can feel the warning signs running through my mind ❜ ❛ so here i go ❜ ❛ my body feels young but my mind is very old ❜ ❛ so what do you say? ❜ ❛ you can’t give me the dreams that are mine anyway ❜ ❛ you’re half the world away ❜ ❛ you know i’d stay but i just can’t stand it ❜ ❛ i’ve been lost, i’ve been found but i don’t feel down ❜ ❛ i don’t feel down ❜

NATURE BOY

❛ there was a boy– ❜ ❛ they say he wandered very far ❜ ❛ the greatest thing you’ll ever learn is to love and be loved in return ❜

WISDOM CRIES

❛ we go way back in time ❜ ❛ we gotta to back to the start ❜ ❛ we are back home ❜ ❛ tick-tock ❜ ❛ where is the light? ❜ ❛ are we meant to go down again? ❜ ❛ it’s an emergency ❜ ❛ no one’s surprised ❜

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dating in storybrooke for the children ( aka effy, tony and mack ) would be a crapshoot because like you could end up being related in someway or with your luck, you’ll end up dating someone that either your family dated/had a one night stand with/was engaged to and it’s just difficult... aka these children may die alone and it’s their family’s fault. 

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if effy was as outspoken as her brother, on this matter that is, she wouldn’t still be caught up in this weird mix. ❛ all i can think about is when it was better, when you and our moms’ actually got along. ❜ tonio’s lucky. she thought to herself. ❛ i hate all of this, and by the way, tonio and i both know that the three of you still haven’t been completely honest about what happened. so would you care to share or am i just wasting my time? ❜ she raised a brow as she spoke, ❛ like i am with this weekend-- ❜ she added as quietly as she could manage.

@littlelxstboy || six pack coors light || effy swan

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headcanon: as a young girl, effy never really understood how people could be cruel to another person, but she started to get a picture of it when she noticed that george would often cringe or pull away just so from a hug that she was giving him. she was never used to that happening given that hugs were always something that she gave her family on a regular basis. when she got a little older ( around the age of six or seven ), she started noticing that there were some marks on his back. they first started being noticeable when she would ask him to get her something that was on a shelf she couldn’t reach.

she had tried to ask her moms’ about it, but every time she did she got scared and backed off; until she finally got the courage to ask george about it. when she did, he sat her down and tried to explain to her that not every family is happy and loving like hers is. that sometimes the people who are supposed to love and protect you end up hurting you in more ways than one person can imagine. he did find it difficult because she was just a child and explaining abuse is traumatic enough to relive, but explaining it to a child was a totally different story.

after he had explained everything to her, and saw all the scars, she gave each and every one of them a kiss ( because that’s how you heal booboos ) and promised to never let anyone hurt him ever again.

when she got even older ( around the age of ten ) she started hugging him from behind because she thought that just like “kissing the booboos” to make them better, you could shield them from the rest of the harm that could come to them. and at this age she started to understand more of what he had told her when she was younger. this was also when she knew that she wanted to keep people safe, not just her dad or her family, but the entire town.

so when she was fifteen, he finally reached a deal with her moms’ and she became the guardian of storybrooke. effy’s drive to become the guardian, and the person she is now, stemmed from her just wanting to keep george safe from his past.

( @littlelxstboy )

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❛ sometimes, all you need to do is completely make an ass of yourself and laugh it off to realize that life isn’t so bad after all. ❜ effy pointed out with a shrug as she took another small sip of her coffee. ❛ i mean sure, life sucks about eighty percent of the time, but if you can’t find a way to look at the brighter side, we’ll all end up just.... hating life and everything around us. ❜ she admitted with a small shrug. ❛ besides, the strongest form of self love is the ability to make fun of yourself and be able to laugh at yourself. ❜

@willhalstxad || starter call || effy swan

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❛ i’ve had worse, ❜ effy admitted, moving some hair from her face. ❛ most times now i’m usually too drunk to feel anything, guess it hasn’t kicked in yet. ❜ she shrugged one shoulder gently before rolling it to ease the muscles. staring into her glass, effy sighed and slid it away, alcohol seeming less than pleasing at the moment. ❛ bright lights big city, some people tend to go a little overboard. ❜ she couldn’t help but laugh a little. ❛ are you new here or something? i’ve never seen you before. ❜ to be fair, since losing her brother she hadn’t really paid much attention, most things usually blurred into one long event, but her question still held merit in that aspect.

@musingbabies || starter call || effy swan

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someone give me effy grieving over the loss of her tony... bc it’s nearly 3am and i have so many feelings! 

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    --   click the heart for a starter !!

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surprise i’m back!

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@littlelxstboy // shattered souls & a broken frame // closed starter

wandering the street outside the hospital in boston wasn’t exactly the best idea she’d had, but in that moment it was the only one that made sense. in fact it was the only thing that made sense. nothing else made sense, absolutely nothing made sense anymore. tony was dead, the other half of her heart would soon be six feet underground. everything was falling apart. ❛ i can’t do this without him, i can’t... no matter what happened in my life i always had tonio... he was always there... ❜ she turned to look at george.

❛ it should’ve been me... i should be the one lying dead in that room, not him... ❜ she sobbed. in the back of her mind, she knew that she wouldn’t have been able to change anything that had happened. but nevertheless, her “guardian” title from years before had snuck back into her mind and she knew she failed him. her bloodied hands and clothes were the constant reminder of that failure as well. ❛ i just can’t believe he’s gone... ❜ she cried.

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@flowernamed // i’ll keep chasing you // closed starter

red and puffy eyes were locked on her phone screen, her hands and most of her clothes were covered in her brother’s blood. she had to call their moms’ she couldn’t let them find out on the news. she had failed her little brother, and it had cost him his life. she wouldn’t ever be able to forgive herself for that. even in the land without magic, she should have been able to help him, to stop this. putting her phone in her pocket as she heard someone walking in the room, effy didn’t even raise her gaze as she said: ❛ how many times do you have to come in here? i’m not leaving him alone. not again. ❜

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HOPE. for real though someone give me an au based off this with my twins... like yesterday please!!!!