hazlehoff

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free will is a dangerous thing because why am i updating a fic in the middle of the night when nobody is awake

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Sorry I’m supposed to be normal about this??

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never in my 20 years of life have I ever thought to explore cricket rpf and HERE YOU ARE, with your patvirat (idk is that what it is called?) fic but it's so good??? you validated something in teenage me who kinda sorta clocked their tea. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who saw yaoi potential in these two hot-headed heartthrobs

oh hello — i am rather new to the cricket rpf world too actually, here’s to hoping it’s a small but growing community!!

they’re apparently called patrat (like the pokemon, which is very amusing to me) but AHH THANK YOU SO MUCH 🤩 happy to hear you’re enjoying my insanity!

your teenage self is better than me because i only clocked how interesting their dynamics were after that ipl nets video dropped of the two of them last year. that led me back to obsessively searching both of their names up on google, twitter, tumblr, etc, and i couldn’t stop thinking about how pat almost deliberately never praises virat in media 😗 almost like he’s trying too hard to hide how much he loves him, ygwim? 😏 the cherry on top of the cake being that pat got virat’s wicket in the world cup final, so. it was begging to be explored imo, hehe.

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free will is a dangerous thing because why am i updating a fic in the middle of the night when nobody is awake

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doing a deep dive into shubman/pat here and did you know about the video where they exchanged jerseys? and they kept sledging each other in the gabba test match 😭😭 also there was a moment before this bgt when a reporter told shubman that pat had said the short ball ploy is very successful against indian batters, and shubbers snippily replied with something like, "they've got, like 2 of our tailenders out on the short ball, so i dont know which success he's referring to." 😂

so lovers to enemies to lovers again coded

alsooo...

https://share.google/images/VFpj0UcMd8wQIUCin

I loooveee espn and their chatpate headlines 😋

oh my god the jersey exchange wasn't that on pat's vlog or something (why can't i find the vlogs now omg the lost sacred texts... someone bring it back)

i love this omg this is exactly what went on in their kkr days i have no doubts

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ugh don’t you just hate it when your brain is finally co-operating and you want to write more but your body reminds you of the concept of sleep

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how is shubman gill the only one i can rely on in the indian cricket team to keep the yaoi up

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totally see the vk/pat ship you've been promoting, but can I suggest an equally intriguing and often overlooked ship in shubman/pat? 👀👉🏻👈🏻

i see it and i ship it too! their kkr-budding days to being captains together for their respective teams (both internationally and for the ipl) oh i cannot wait for when india and australia play for the bgt again

(nope i totally do not have a folder on my phone of my favourite people together haha who said that)

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i have not an iota of self control: Chapter 1 of the Pat/Josh fake dating fic is up!

patty and hoff fake dating at a wedding au so clear in my head btw...

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may or may not have started drafting the opening to this (most likely a one-shot fic only thank god) — if i abandon the great war for the time being this might be why 🤪

patty and hoff fake dating at a wedding au so clear in my head btw...

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totally see the vk/pat ship you've been promoting, but can I suggest an equally intriguing and often overlooked ship in shubman/pat? 👀👉🏻👈🏻

i see it and i ship it too! their kkr-budding days to being captains together for their respective teams (both internationally and for the ipl) oh i cannot wait for when india and australia play for the bgt again

(nope i totally do not have a folder on my phone of my favourite people together haha who said that)

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they're finally out of the trenches yall this fic might be ending soon finally!!!!!!!

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If ANY of yall EVER do this shit to me, im deleting every single fic out of spite.

If I ever catch one of yall doing this to another author and I know youre a follower of my work I will block you personally on every platform

None of yall are the fic police. I DESPISE genai. I think its an insult to art, humanity, and the planet itself. But aint not a single fucking person here qualified to pick apart a strangers fic looking for a gotcha moment to make yourselves feel superior. If you think something is ai you can ask the author (most are proud of the ai use and will just tell you straight up) if they say yes you have your answer and can warn people. If they say no and you dont believe them you block and quietly keep it between you and maybe a close group of friends. Spreading misinformation is DANGEROUS. And NONE of you doing this shit are anywhere near qualified to do it.

THIS GOES DOUBLY FOR ARTISTS.

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if he shaves now i am personally flying out to darwin and throwing his razor into the ocean.

i don’t know if i’m running low on sleep or if it’s my hormones but hoff is looking very hot to me right now

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I JUST REALISED ONE OF THE BIGGEST MISTAKES I HAD MADE AT THE BEGINNING OF MY FIC HAHAHAHAHAHA MAXWELL WASN'T EVEN PART OF RCB IN 2018... HE ONLY JOINED RCB IN 2021 – OH WELL WHATEVER IT'S FICTION I WILL JUST CONTINUE TO PRETEND HE WAS ALWAYS IN RCB SINCE DAY ONE AND ALSO THAT MEANS I CAN PUSH FORWARD EVENTS TO HOWEVER I LIKE - FUCK CANON

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how is shubman gill the only one i can rely on in the indian cricket team to keep the yaoi up

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i am sorry i really need to get this off my chest but i love kohli just as much as the next person does and his premature test cricket retirement is obviously a huge void never to be filled but it is getting just a tad bit annoying how some of the people in the kohli fan club are constantly still talking about him after the win by “taking credit” and saying things like “thank you virat kohli for giving us mohd siraj we couldn’t have won this without you” like i appreciate the sentiment yes but at this point they are moving exactly like the ms dhoni fan club they had issues with 😭

i just think that apart from there being an appropriate time and place, more importantly there is a right tone and way of speaking and you can tell these people are just rage-baiting or want more likes… i hate it it’s leaving a sick aftertaste in my mouth