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Day # 6: Big Fan of the Fan Dance Today was my final full day in South Korea. I fly out tomorrow night at 8 am and will tour a little beforehand but this Asian peninsula adventure is drawing to a close. The day started with sprinkles that turned into occasional bouts of rain. For monsoon season, the weather has been extremely reasonable so I can't remotely complain about the rain today. The first event was a televised celebration of the Armistice that ended the Korean War. Today was the anniversary and so I sat in the same audience as the Prime Minister of South Korea waving a UN flag. Soldiers and school children performed acts to celebrate the occasion and my favorite act was a group of school kids who sang popular folk songs from UN nations. The English speaking song was Waltzing Matilda which is a snooze fest but they killed on the other songs. She'll be Coming Around the Mountain is a far superior folk song for the record. Take that Australia. Post celebration, we headed to the Museum of Korean Warfare, umbrellas in tow. Mr. Bananaman put in his now requisite appearance moments before we arrived at the now rain dampened museum. The statuary outside captivated my attention immediately; while the group was in the gift shop, I stole away to admire the fountains and statues. One fountain was composed of a large metal ball with faces carved all over its surface. It reminded me of a scene from Nightmare on Elm Street when Freddy Kruger opens his shirt and all the faces of the kids he'd killed were in his skin. Hence I'm naming that statue Nightmare Fountain Horror Show and suggesting the Korean government change its current name, which is something like Faces of Korea. The evening event was extremely special and held at the Grand Hyatt Seoul. The UN Forces Banquet was a multi course dinner with veterans , ambassadors, politicians, and our crew of teachers, dressed to the nines and hanging out while a spectacular show and dinner were presented. The wine I was served multiple times didn't help my overall exhaustion from the week's activities but the cultural performances were fantastic. A fan dance was performed that blew my mind, with 20 women holding giant fans moving in dance to form flowers and butterflies. I might have been the American yelling "Yasssss!" while everyone else was clapping. I cannot comment enough on how hard the South Korean people went out of their way to thank America and the United Nations for saving their country, as evidenced over and over again as we traveled the country. This entire tour spent with other UN peace ambassadors reinforced the purpose of diplomacy, support, and international relations in a way textbooks never could. I'm sleepy from the wine now so I'm calling it early but it's been a wonderful experience. Seoul shattering, in a good way. Night everyone!

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Day #5: Finding Mr. Bananaman The entirety of my adventures today were in Seoul so imagine the puns running rampant through my brain all day. Seoul is a sprawling urban landscape backdropped by a beautiful mountain range. As we were driving into downtown Seoul, I spotted a little banana wearing a hat as an advertisement on a wall. This was not a solitary incident. Thus began my hunt for Mr. Bananaman, the top hat wearing fruit that was hidden all over the city. Lunch was jellyfish and stingray. Yup. That's what lunch was. And what's more, I had seconds of jellyfish. It was spicy and similar to glass noodles. On the contrary, the stingray was fried and served with its cartilage intact. And you are supposed to eat the cartilage. I tried and promptly abandoned the endeavor in favor of soft things like more jellyfish. The largest palace in Seoul is situated right below the mountains and was closed today so unfortunately we didn't get inside. That stopped no one as we looked into the palace from the 4th floor of the Museum of Contemporary Korean History. I was so focused on the palace, posing as a South Korean president, and marveling at posters of giant robots that I managed to lose my sunglasses in the museum. I'm still mourning their loss but imagine they are now off for a new life living in Korea. We walked from the museum to the shopping district of Insadong, which the ten year old in me kept thinking of as InstaDong, which would be an amazing name for a men's sexual health product. The street was chockablock full of stores and wagons and booths of goods to peruse, from paper Japanese fans to high end dinnerware and jewelry. I haggled with one woman over metal Korean style chopsticks and came out victorious which made me puffed up with pride for at least a few hours and celebrated with a jujube ginger iced tea. And who do I see when walking away with my drink? Mr. Bananaman hanging out on a light post. We followed our commercialist binge with spiritual enlightenment at a Buddhist temple in the city. There was a large bell-like container guarded by dragons with a slot to deposit coins for karma/prayers/charity. I put 500 Won in to cover my loved ones, just in case. Shoes were lined up outside the temple from all the citizens inside meditating. Shoe thieves should book it to South Korea ASAP because my thoughts on approaching the main room were that I could steal ALL the shoes and no one would know. All the shoes would be mine. Guess who was outside the temple on a banner? Bananaman. The last event of the night was a movie sneak preview of Operation Chromite starring Liam Neeson. The movie centered on a group of South Koreans who spied on North Korea to steal strategic maps for General MacArthur. The Korean actors appeared at the showing and apparently are famous in Korea because the Korean girls in the audience flipped out. Tomorrow is the last full proper day in Korea, I'm amazed how fast this has gone by. Exhausted as always with my mind drifting to thoughts of opening a restaurant here that serves fried chicken, jambalaya, and cornbread. It's called Seoul Food. Good night!

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Day #4 Part I: Kim Jong-I'm In Your Country, Jerk I was in North Korea. We entered the DMZ through Camp Bonifas and were checked multiple times for passports and general sketchiness I suppose. Greeted by the American and South Korean forces that guard the border, we were given an introduction to the conflicts that have plagued the uneasy relationship of North and South Korea. One such conflict was called the Ax Murder incident. This was all before heading to the border so I was jazzed and making mental notes to remember Ax Murder Korea google searches. The soldiers escorting us to the border stressed multiple times to not engage with the North Korean soldiers at all. No talking, no pointing, no gesturing, no mocking. Strictly no. The dress code required that we wear long pants and nothing too revealing that might cause an incident because we may be observed. "May be" was a massive understatement. Enlarge the picture of me standing in front of the UN Buildings and the large grey North Korean government. Look at the top balcony. Scores of North Korean soldiers walking by and stopping to observe us. The blue UN buildings are half in South Korea and half in North Korea. Once you enter the room, which I did, you see a large table in the dead center. Pass that table, you are in North Korea. Two South Korean soldiers guard the room while American and South Korean soldiers guard the outside on the South side. But right out the window, once you pass that center table, you will see North Korean soldiers at guard. I took a picture of them when I was over the North Korean border. The picture of me standing next to the South Korean soldier was taken in North Korea. The South Korean soldiers are always in a resting Tae Kwon Do pose when guarding the building. The most disconcerting moment occurred when we entered the UN building that connects North and South and the American soldier accompanying us announced a two minute time limit. I immediately walked over to North Korea to get pictures. Thirty seconds later, he had a radio message come in and he said, "sorry we have to go now, please leave this building immediately." They escorted us quickly to the bus and drove us out of there fast. On the way out, we passed the Bridge of No Return. POWs who were released from either side were left here. They could choose which direction to leave: North or South but once they left the bridge, there was no going back. Later that day, we attended a wreath ceremony at Seoul National Cemetery, where Australian veterans were honored for their service, followed by a driving tour of the grounds and statues. Beautiful cemetery reminiscent of a smaller Arlington. But you guys, I was in North Korea.

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Day #4 Part II: "Korean Filter" Disneyland 

To cap off a very somber but exhilarating day, we headed to Korea's most famous theme park, Everland. Down to calling their workers cast members in uniforms with thin stripes and boater hats, someone went to Disneyland and ripped it all off. Then added rainbows and glitter and kawaii because it's Asia.

 The first ride we went on was a Jungle Cruise knock off with a manic girl with a bunny on her head describing the animals we passed. Except in Korea, the animals were real and in small living spaces. Honestly the whole thing made me feel sorry for the animals, (babe you know my thoughts on zoos), but it was over quickly, I discovered Jackass penguins are a thing so that's a win, and we were off for some shenanigans. 

You guys, I was up to hijinks in this place. We grabbed food in a German Village Haus; my order was a spicy chicken stick, a churro, and a Sprite. Distinctly Germanic fare. Churros nowhere near as good as the ones outside the Haunted Mansion in Disneyland. Here's where I went awry. Picking up my food, I noticed a giant clear bottle of clear liquid next to the napkins. My first thought: sweet, hand sanitizer!! So I set my food down, put my hand under the nozzle and pound on the top. A TON of liquid comes out, I start rubbing my hands together, and immediately discover that there is something really wrong. My literal second thought: wow, Korean hand sanitizer is so sticky. I keep rubbing my hands together to get it to soak in then notice small English type on the side of the bottle saying "Sugar Syrup". 

Post dinner and a massive hand clean up, despite a seeming hatred of napkin dispensers in this country, six of us decided to ride a towering nightmare of a wooden roller coaster named T-Express. I REALLY don't think they follow general rules for angles in Korea because that was one of, if not THE, scariest roller coaster I have ever been on. I scream laughed the entire time. I'm hoarse as I'm writing this. It went almost straight down on its drops to the point everyone commented that their butts were in the air above the seats. 

As I walked out of the park, I waved to the lady waving goodbye with panda puppets on her hands and felt happiness in doing so. Great wrap up to an amazing day. As always, exhausted and headed for bed. Miss my cat, my family, easy access to napkins, and of course, Adam. He's my Seoul mate. 

Good night everyone!

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Day #3 Part I: Hot Dogs and Heroes Leaving on a train for Busan, situated on the coast of South Korea, we were given an American style breakfast in a box. This included half a hot dog, fried chicken, fruit, and a bagel with jam. I kinda loved it. Korea has Americans down cold. We started our day at the United Nations Memorial Cemetery in Korea with a ceremony honoring the contribution of the nations who supported South Korea in the Korean War. We stood shoulder to shoulder, descendants of veterans who had fought in that land, in silence as flags from each nation flapped in the wind and a trumpet played tribute. It was moving to consider the changes this country had seen since our bloodlines were last in the country and encouraging that every country had representatives there. Once the ceremony was over, we were given a white flower to place at any gravesite or memorial to which we felt drawn. I walked to the American memorial and laid my flower at its feet. The memorial reads "Honor, Freedom, Peace" and I felt proud of that patriotic statement. I stood on the grounds after placing my flower and watched other members placing their flowers at graves for their countrymen and memorials for their homelands. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a young man I have talked with from South Korea named Jong Woo head towards the American memorial with his flower. I turned to watch as he placed his only flower at the feet of the American memorial alongside my flower, then stepped back, and deeply and slowly bowed. Honest moment, I had a few tears. This was a very young man showing respect and gratefulness to a foreign country who helped his to remain free. The whole event was a reminder of the good will and love in the world we can have for each other so naturally, I was misty eyed. I'm a sucker for patriotism when used in appropriate avenues. (Political side eye!)

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Day #3 Part II: Legends of the Hidden Buddhist Temple A midday hike through urban areas quickly giving over to an oceanside temple tucked and surrounded in lush greenery sounds utterly ideal to me so today's visit to Hae Dong Yong Gung Temple was brilliant. Taking a bus from the Busan metro station, we were let off at the bottom of an enormous hill. The weather has been humid and hot in Korea so halfway up the hill I was as wet as if I had been in a torrential downpour. Once the street market that leads to the temple appeared I was ignoring any physical/liquid state I happened to be in and grew more and more excited as I traveled on. The street market was filled with booths selling squids on a stick, exotic vegetables, and larvae to eat. The booths were shabbily fascinating, selling odds/ends that begged for a longer look but given our schedule, I pressed on. Winding my way through throngs of people, the crowds eventually gave way to a stunning temple that sprawls the ocean's cliffside with statuary deities and cultivated plants. Many people worshipped as I climbed to the top of the temple, prone before the statue that addressed their need. There was one for mothers, one for care of children, and another for health. At the top of a steep roughly shaped stone stairway, peering down on the enormity of the temple below, the deity of calm and mercy faces the ocean in symbolism against the dark forces of life/nature. Taking a moment to absorb the beauty of the area, the sheer personal will and sweat to get to the top, and the concept that around the world, regardless of belief, we all hope for the best for our family and friends against all harm, I felt more connected to the world. Not giving away worldly possessions connected but generally positive towards the whole of it.

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Day #3 Part III: A Fish is a Dream Your Heart Makes?

Tonight’s dinner was an extensive multi course traditional Korean meal at an upscale restaurant. I have a standing rule during travel to at a minimum taste anything put in front of me, no matter the raised eyebrow it inspires. (Looking at you, fishhead pasta in Germany)

The meal served tonight was no exception and so I found myself ingesting foods that once described were not anything my hands would normally bring anywhere near my mouth. I’m a seafood novice, only prone to eating crab cakes and fish and chips. Vanilla level for sure. I’m quickly learning that in Asia, you need to be a blackbelt in ocean digestion.

To the best of my recollection, here are the dishes as described in tonight’s food glut:

Course 1: Abalone Organ Porridge (yup, organs) Course 2: Appetizers made of roots Course 3: Fruit and root salad (fresh and good) Course 4: Pancake of The Six Colors Course 5: Sashimi of Flatfish and Octopus Course 6: Mushroom and Beef Bulgogi Course 7: Giant Prawns Course 8: Ginseng and Fungus with Honey Course 9: Fish, Zucchini, and Kimchi pancakes Course 10: Vegetable Tempura (my favorite) Course 11: Spicy Slivered Octopus Course 12: Gujeol-Pan (9 Delicacies) Course 13: Seaweed and Mushroom Soups Course 14: Blueberries and Honeydew

To be honest, the extravagance, presentation, and experience to try these foods was wonderful. The chopsticks were the first authentically Korean pair I had used: they are flat and metal here. I was enraptured by the beauty and care put in each dish. That said, a few of these plates were out of my range of appreciation. I loved the bulgogi and vegetable tempura. I get vegetable tempura when out for sushi so it was familiar and deliciously bad for you. Of course the American loved the beef and fried foods.

Octopus. Octopus. These terrors of the deep shouldn’t be eaten. They’ll find out we ate their kind, walk out of the water, and kill us in our sleep. I disliked every bite of octopus I took but I finished all my portions. The octopods probably have my name on a list now.

Overall the meal was brilliantly executed and was a unique experience I value greatly. Through no fault of their’s, they served an American guy who wants to be internationally savvy and chic but will always pick fried chicken over fishy dishes if given the choice.

Tomorrow is the DMZ. I’ll be looking at North Korea so wish me luck. Ending the night with another 90s cover band, Seoul Asylum. Night everyone!

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Day #2: Soju Think You Know South Korea? Breakfast today consisted of some adventurous choices, some of which paid off, some of which polite society would comment "oh....interesting". My breakfast was: combination cereal which was a blend of all cereal types (kid in me loved a suicide-cereal mix). Small sausages sautéed with onion and bell pepper, fresh fruit, bread roll with butter and jam, seaweed soup (you guys.....no), and kimchi over steamed rice. Overall I'm finding things I really enjoy and some that I will try to trick Adam into trying. Leaving breakfast behind we traveled from Incheon into Seoul to visit the National Museum of Korea. We drove by Gangnam, the neighborhood the song Gangnam Style is based on. We were told it's a very up and coming stylish part of Seoul, hence the song. The first activity was a series of lectures on Korean history and culture, followed by a tour of major artifacts in the museum. In the lecture, our presenter introduced the concept of Hongik Ingan, which means that as a country, South Korea's efforts must help mankind, not harm it. Helping other people is a crazy concept, I know. The artifacts that impressed me most in the National Museum were the ancient collection of earrings for wealthy men, the royal "crown" wore round the neck, and the serene Buddha that was spotlit in its own room. The museum itself was immense and I could have easily spent another three hours there but fashion waits for no man so I left the exhibits of the museum to dress in Hanbok traditional costumes. That's when men's fashion was reborn. Paired with a lecture on the outfit's history, I was given a men's Hanbok in teal and light pink. The Hanbok has enormous pants that tie around your waist, paired with a shirt, vest, and overcoat. The outfit is super comfortable, the color choices are certainly vibrant but ultimately I'm more of an autumn than a pastel spring. No Hanbok purchases headed home with me. Lunch was distinctly fishy with the cold Soba noodle soup and shrimp fried rice containing a GENEROUS helping of fish flavor. The spring rolls and wontons were awesome though and the plum green iced tea was amazing. I'd drink it on the daily if Starbucks imported the concept. The lecture after lunch was facilitated by a professor who is in the South Korean military. He was nervous to present in front of teachers so I made sure to nod thoughtfully with eye contact often. The most interesting concept from the lecture in my view was his offhand comment that North Korea will most likely not exist as a country in five years. When pressed to elaborate he smiled and implied that he couldn't due to his military contract. Dinner was the best yet with vegetable potstickers and two beef stir fry dishes, one of which was just the right amount of spiciness. Dinner was polished off with a trip to a nearby bar adorned with a lot of Tarentino movie posters where I had my first and last drink of Soju. Soju smells like rubbing alcohol and tastes like poison. Sure I felt a buzz extremely quick but soju impressed upon me that it was vodka's ugly and violent brother. I'm a lightweight though so take my review with a heavy grain of salt. Tomorrow is a high speed train ride along with market shopping. I'm brushing up on my haggling skills before bed while listening to 90s Korean cover band, Collective Seoul. Night everyone!

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Day #1: Bathrooms and Bibimbap 

Seoul! Prepare for an onslaught of Seoul Man and Heart and Seoul jokes throughout the course of the next week. I’m officially in South Korea and it’s beyond exciting. My flight from LAX to Seoul was 12 hours long, the longest flight I’ve ever traveled. I managed to parse the time into manageable chunks by watching The Lobster, Deadpool, and Hail Caesar. (The Lobster was great!) Beyond the inflight movies, I finished I Am Not Myself These Days by Josh Kilmer Purcell for a third time and am moving onto Stiletto by Daniel O'Malley in my “free time” here. (There is none! Busy adventurers!)

New phenomenon I had never experienced on the flight here: the airplane bathrooms occupied after every on flight meal for 10-15 minutes at a time as Korean passengers brushed their teeth and took vanity cases into the bathroom. Huge lines with passengers all carrying their cases for the bathroom. I wanted an express line for passengers who promised a three minute bathroom sprint. 

 Inflight food options were mostly Korean in nature which was fun to observe. Lunch was a bibimbap bowl which is a very common dish in Korea. I’ll get a picture of another sometime this week. Dinner was beef and asparagus with steamed rice, then the odd accompaniment of mozzarella and tomato caprese, with carrot cake as dessert. Overall the food was average to bad, despite the Asian flavor palate. My favorite food item inflight was a steamed bun with beef, scallion, and spicy sauce filling. These were passed out like some airlines pass out peanuts and it was delicious.  Bring more buns to America is my new presidential slogan.   

When I arrived in Seoul, I met up with the UN group and was amazed to instantly be talking with people from New Zealand, Ethiopia, Greece, Korea, Canada, Turkey, and Northern Ireland. Everyone is unbelievable nice. I have my own delegation of college students who run the nationality gambit that I will be mentoring in discussions and interpreting our missions into South Korea. We spent the evening at Yonsei University, which is also our base camp, getting to know everyone. It was so great seeing all the different skin colors, cultural styles, and hearing all the accents in the form of laughter and camaraderie. Unbelievably happy to be a part of it. 

I’m exhausted but excited as I sign off. 

From the bottom of my Seoul, good night!

[hayeseascorpus]

K-Popping Overseas

Memories of Berlin biergartens seem a world away, drinking a chilled shandy and sweating from the unseasonable German heat. Last summer, Germany was the source of wonder, discovery, and a horde of new friends through the Transatlantic Outreach Program. I remember fondly an overflowing abundance of sausage, the beautiful rolling hills of Geisa, and dinner with my trip wife Nicole outside the Dresden opera house.

Beginning this coming Thursday, I foray into a new fellowship with friends to be made, new cuisines to be feasted upon, and a unique culture to explore. I will be flying from Los Angeles, California to Seoul, South Korea as part of ten teachers selected to interact with the Ministry of Patriots and Veteran Affairs, the United Nations Peace Camp, and the Korean War Digital History Project. The trip will last seven days in the peninsula of Korea, exploring the city and countryside in an immersive opportunity I cannot wait to begin.

I will make every effort to update this blog with the foods, peoples, and experiences that I encounter throughout the trip so follow along on my first venture into the continent of Asia!

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And so goodbye Berlin! This trip has been immeasurably excellent on so many fronts that I can't describe all the ways it's changed and affected me. Here's a few points:

Germany is a beautiful European country with style, culture, and history on every corner. If anything I'm motivated to see and understand more of the world than I ever was before. Travel changes and forces you to grow in ways you never could have conceived. Cultural and current events in the states are mirrored in Germany with people working in both countries for a much better future.

Döner is the best street food around.

Vincent looks pretty damn amazing in heels.

Beyond these thoughts as I'm laying in bed before turning off the light a final time in Germany, I just have to say that I'm grateful beyond count for this opportunity and TOP is a program ALL history teachers should apply for. This trip was life changing/affirming! Goodbye and Goodnight Berlin. It's been wonderful.

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German Italian food is...amazing?! Tonight was dinner at the Biergarten restaurant where they filmed Inglorious Bastards (sp). I shared the Gooseberry Camembert with Nicole and then had the Chanterelle Parmesan pasta. We were told by a guide that Germans are obsessed with Italian food right now and they were right. The Italian I've had on this trip has consistently been awesome.

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Urban Berlin Renewal = Berban Renewal! Today we visited a primarily immigrant occupied neighborhood of Berlin called Kreuzberg. There has been an undercurrent of anti-Islam sentiment bubbling through in some of the communities we've visited so this was an interesting opportunity to talk with services and charities organized around helping the Turkish communities. Berlin is covered in graffiti and street art which, some of which is quite good, so there's a very cool feeling walking around the streets and beginning to recognize artists and their work. We stopped by an urban garden on the roof of a shopping center and took in a panorama of the city. The blend of old and new in Berlin is in present everywhere you look. Tomorrow is our last day in Germany. It's been a transformative experience and introduced many new lines of thinking. I'm excited to process it all and get back to the states, but I'll miss everyday being an exploration of the German unknown.

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"You stood up to be counted with the enemy of everything the Grail stands for, who gives a damn what you think?!" "You do!" I might occasionally be recreating Indiana Jones by myself on this trip. Whether I play Elsa or Dr. Jones depends on the day. Today we attended a lecture on modern Germany and comparisons with America. We need to resolve the racism ASAP, it make our statistics problematic. On the way, we walked through the memorial to book burning in the square where the Nazis used to do it. The memorial is empty bookshelves sunk into the ground as a reminder that it should never happen again.

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Sachsenhausen

The holocaust camp we visited was the headquarters for all concentration camp policy. Uniforms, triangle colors, and punishments were uniformly decided here in the deceptively innocent officers’ offices you see nestled in the trees like a cottage.

Our Sachsenhausen guide told a story of a physics teacher who was active in human rights protests before the war who was turned into the Nazis for being gay. The guide explained that being gay was considered the lowest of the undesirables and you were given the hardest work in an effort to kill you the fastest. This teacher was brought to Sachsenhausen and was sent to the camp furthest from the eyes of anyone else to die. As a gay teacher who cares about human rights, this struck a very close nerve with me. I wish that teacher could see where we are today and I had a moment of blindly hoping that he had loved someone and was loved back before he was killed for being himself.

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Berlin! We are officially in Berlin and we entered through the largest train station in Europe. This was followed by a bus tour around the city which included red light districts as prostitution is legal in Germany. I asked about prices and the going rate consensus seemed to be 50€. The second picture shows the memorial for European Jews killed during the world war. It starts with slabs at ground level and as you proceed, the begin to overwhelm you in a maze. I have to admit, I haven't full tilt broken down yet but I've gotten a little overwhelmed/misty in places where the enormity of history can hit you.

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Moving to Dresden? Today was primarily occupied by visiting the trade schools of Dresden which was promptly followed by a very serious nap on my part. I had a dream our gay French choreographer guide took me to a movie and wouldn't stop yelling joyous commentary at the screen. Make of that what you will. The evening was free for our own excursions so my friend Nicole and I went to a charming upscale restaurant in the outdoor alcove of a palace. I had Rosa Kalbsrücken mit Schalotten (veal with shallots) and a Spanish red wine pairing. Appetizer was a warm chèvre with a tomato ragout that was phenomenal. All in all, a super romantic dinner with my trip wife. Tomorrow, Berlin!