hanahakiken - Tumblr blog

[hanahakiken]

a quick step by step guide on what to do if you come back to your apartment and find yourself locked out because your front door is frozen shut

kick the bottom of the door for 10 minutes

text your landlord

remember your landlord is on vacation and also in her mid 50′s so it takes about 36 hours to receive a response

briefly wonder why the fuck you moved the canada

remember that college tuition is significantly cheaper here than in the united states 

look up and notice your cat is at the window, staring at you. he paws at the window lightly and meows. it’s devastating. his eyes are so big and imploring. decide that you have to get inside your apartment at all costs. not even god himself can stop you from feeding your cat his chicken wet food dinner. frida kahlo herself could descend from the heavens and ask “hey you wanna bang?” and you’d say “hell yeah but first let me open this door so i can feed my cat his dinner”

remember there is a starbucks 3 blocks down the street from you

enter. the barista gives you a weird look for entering a starbucks at 7pm on a tuesday

order a venti cup of hot water. you order in french because the barista just said “bonjour” instead of “bonjour, hi.” you have a strong american accent. you hit the r in merci a little too hard to compensate. you embarrass yourself.

exit the starbucks clutching the massive cup of hot water in your hands. it’s burning your fingers.

return. methodically pour the starbucks cup of water all over the the door frame. it begins moving a little but still wont open

back up

ensure your doc martens are properly gripping the sheet of ice covering the ground. many people have told you to stop wearing doc martens in the winter, despite your protests that theyre actually the ideal winter boot. also, you’re a lesbian and punk’s not dead

release a pterodactyl screech and sprint towards the door, slamming the full force of your pathetically tiny 5′2″ 110lb body into it

you dont know any of your neighbors so you dont care about maintaining your pride anyways

the door swings open

run up the stairs

open the actual door to your apartment and yell MOMMY’S HOME MY LITTLE BITCHASS BABY BOY DONT WORRY at your cat

cat flings his body to the ground and starts purring like he does every time you come home

write tumblr post

[hanahakiken]

The only thing tempting me to play resident evil 2 rn is that one pic of the main twink with his titties just popping out of that vest

[hanahakiken]

y’all: my love language is ‘words of affirmation’!

me, an intellectual: praise kink

[hanahakiken]

[hanahakiken]

im waking up to ash and dust i wipe my brow and i slap my nuts

[hanahakiken]

from this thread, the majority of the threaded comments were dumb sex jokes in response to op’s answers but i felt this was worth preserving

[hanahakiken]

there is never enough rainbow right hehe also zen also is here to celebrate 

[hanahakiken]

Heard some important information on Twitter today, and thought I’d post it here for anyone who may not have heard it. This is actually a thing, devised by human rights organisation called Karma Nirvana.

Reblog to save a life?

[hanahakiken]

shinka no natsu photoshoots

karasuno

[hanahakiken]

“The perfect video doesn’t exi-” Credits to Voordeel on YouTube for creating this amazing and perfectly timed video

[hanahakiken]

[hanahakiken]

I thought it was pretty out

[hanahakiken]

[hanahakiken]

When you’re in the middle of sobbing and you start dissociating so you’re like “okay I’m done now” and turn into an emotionless zombie

[hanahakiken]

iron man: holy shit we gotta beat thanos

captain america: yeah we gotta beat thanos

thor: guys we gotta beat thanos

the hulk: we have to beat thanos

winston: room for one more?

the avengers: holy shit winston

winston: overwatch

[hanahakiken]

the one where suga helps takeru with volleyball and oikawa gets absolutely smitten with his nephew’s coach

-oisuga weekend april 28th: different first meeting-