A parabatai was a friend who had chosen you to be their best friend, who had made their friendship permanent. They were that sure about how much their liked you, that sure they would never want to take it back
James Herondale, Tales from the Shadowhunter Academy (via harrietcarstairs)
I had this idea and I just really had to write it. It didn’t go exactly as planned but I think I’m happy with it.
This takes place a little while before LM
“I need new clothes,” Livvy declared as she barged into Julian’s room. All the Blackthorns always knocked carefully on Emma’s door, afraid of what they might walk in on, but Jules’s room was safe. In other words, his love life was disappointingly boring.
“Just order online, as usual. Credit card is in the drawer.” Julian sat at his desk, Emma beside him on the floor.
“Can’t I go shopping?” Her tone was tentative, polite, but she was already forming plan B: getting to the mall without your older brother finding out.
Just then Ty shuffled into the room behind Livvy, one earphone out so he could follow the conversation, stepping in to help her if necessary. She smiled and grabbed his hand.
“Livia…” Julian sighed. “I’m not sure-”
“Shush Jules!” Emma slapped his arm. “I’ll take her. I’ll take take you, Livs. You want to come too, Ty?”
“Em, have you not been listening to anything I’ve said in the last ten minutes? The drevak.”
“Yes, but the clothes, Jules.” She sent a wicked grin in the twins’ direction.
Awkwardly Ty cleared his throat and squeezed his sister’s hand. When Livvy turned to him he said quietly “Jules is right, Livvy. A drevak is more important than clothes.”
Livvy’s heart melted seeing the quizzical expression Ty sent Emma’s way.
Apparently, so did Julian’s because he agreed to let Livvy and Ty go to the mall themselves.
Quickly she looked at Ty.
You up for this?
Do you mind if I sit this one out?
“I’ll go alone,” she announced to those not following their silent conversation.
With pursed lips Jules gently asked her to take Cristina or Diana.
At that moment Dru stalked by, dragging Tavvy behind her. It was clear she was in a mood, and Livvy couldn’t help but remember the last time she had seen Dru angry.
The youngest Blackthorn sister had been babysitting Tavvy, and trying to watch one of her movies at the same time. Tavvy had screamed, so she had asked the twins to take him for a while. On their way to the training room, Livvy had declined. Dru’s anger was silent, but evident in her eyes and the set of her mouth.
“Of course you’re all having a meeting without me!” she huffed now, not even pausing in the doorway.
An idea formed in Livvy’s head.
“I’ll take Dru.”
“You sure? She hates-“
“I’m taking Dru.”
Dru was not a great shopping companion. In fact, she was hardly a shopping companion at all: she didn’t try anything on, and made minimal comments when Livvy showed her what she was wearing.
“Your turn. I got everything I need.”
Dru’s face flushed. “I already… I don’t want anything.”
Livia tried to convince her to just try something on – in vain. “Alright then. Just stand in line to the fitting rooms. I’ll just grab a few more shirts I want to try.”
When she came back she handed Dru the shirts and pushed her into the fiitting room. “For you.”
The younger girl stuttered but closed the curtains.
“Dru? Are you ready yet? It’s just a shirt.”
“I- I don’t like it,” a choked voice came back.
“Let me see.”
“No. Ummm… Maybe a bigger size?” The voice sounded as if Dru was holding back tears.
“I’m coming in.” Inside stood Dru, staring at her reflection, tears in her eyes. She wore a light blue shirt that showed off her figure beautifully but rode up her stomach a little. Dru was trying to tug it down.
“Oh wow, Dru, it looks great. I’m sorry I got the wrong size. It’s because of the boobs. You have everything I lack.” Dru looked at her, stricken. “What? I can say that. I’m your sister.”
“It’s not boobs, Livs. It’s fat.” A tear rolled down her cheek.
“Dru. Dru, no! Don’t say that!” Livvy reached forward to hug Dru, who shied away, making the hug awkward. “Listen sis, you are beautiful. You are perfect in every way, inside and out. I know it’s cheesy, I know anyone can say that, but I mean it. You can do anything any other shadowhunter can, so please don’t try telling me you’re fat or not fit. You can do anything a shadowhunter can, and keep those curves! That makes you my hero, beautiful. And sure, you might not have the longest legs, but it’s not exactly my fault Ty was blessed with those. So, how about that shirt? And some shorts?”
Dru was laughing through tears into Livvy’s shoulder, hugging her back now. “Thanks, but I feel naked in shorts.”
“You sure? I’m certain you’d kill in those black shorts out front.”
“Black?”
“Black.”
“Okay then. I’ll try one pair of shorts. One.”
Livvy came back with almost 20, and Dru tried them all on with (minimal) complaints.
we haven’t known each other for a long time, but it somehow feels like you have always been with me. maybe you were the person i saw in my dreams, the small voice i heard inside of my head, the shadow walking right beside me, maybe it had always been you. you were the reason why i was fighting for what felt like an eternity, and if i am to be completely honest, i almost didn’t make it. but i held on, and every singłe ounce of misery was worth it because it led me to you. you are one of the best things that has happened to me, maybe even the absolute best, and it may be selfish of me to be saying so. i was trapped in a deep abyss, and even after you helped me find my way out, i still find myself back in that same dark pit from time to time. but the thoughts and temptations that once consumed every last bit of hope somehow become replaced with the thought of you. i’ve always struggled to see the value in my life and i still do, but i made a promise to you which i never intend to break. i promised you that i wouldn’t leave you and i won’t. i absolutely won’t. it’s downright selfish of me to be saying that you’re the reason why i continually live, and there are a couple of other factors, but you being the main one. i hope you don’t see this as a burden in which you feel obligated to be with me, because that’s the last thing i want. i swear to you that i will continue to live even if you choose not to be with me anymore. i will survive, so please worry not. i have no idea when my feelings for you will stop growing, and i’m not sure i want them to. perhaps there’s something that’s far greater and far deeper than love, and maybe that’s where i’m heading.
something beyond love // S.T. (via littlemissimaginary)
Ok, do not worry about me. This Is literally to tell you something that’s been bothering me recently. So I’ve been extremely unlike myself and I’m fucking up a lot of my friendship and kinda also my relationship. But my friends I love. And I love my boyfriend(?) too and with out him I’d probably be dead. But I hate how I’m acting so I’m going to go to the doctor soon and see what’s wrong with me wether it mentally or physically. And I’m doing this to see if I can get help so I can go back to the way I was and keep my friendships and my relationship good, successful, and improving. So I may be a little inactive because of that too. So Dani I’m sorry I’ve been pushing you away. And if Charles if your randomly on here, I’m so fucking sorry about everything ive been doing. I love you so much baby.
Before I left the band room for the last time, I checked every room in the band room, the hallways and the staircases leading to the band room, the bleachers, and the marching band field for all my past selves. For all the tiny pieces that make up my soul. For 4 years, I left these pieces in the places that meant the most to me. But on the last day, I knew I had to go back and collect all those pieces so I can give them a new home for them to reside in. I found one practicing in the hallway, in the same spot it had always been for 4 years. I found another walking down the staircase that lead to the band room, carrying a backpack. As I walked down the hallway, another one came running around the corner holding a marching band uniform. I found another one sitting in the middle of the band room, playing a lovely jazz tune. I found another one leaning against the wall in the band room with tears dripping down its face, muttering words of doubt and apprehension. I opened the door to the outside world and found another one sitting in the bleachers with its marching band uniform on and an instrument in its hand, chanting. I beckoned for it to follow me and it did. I headed towards the marching band field because I knew that is where I would find the last piece. I opened the gate and there I saw the last piece, laughing and smiling. I beckoned for it to come to me, but all it did was shake its head. My time was up. It was time for me to leave this home for good. I beckoned for it again. All it did was smile at me one last time before turning away from me. I waved goodbye and left the last piece of my soul running around, smiling and laughing with all the other lost pieces of souls that did not return to their person.