haganekotetsu

[haganekotetsu]

drinking an entire bottle of wine then yelling at this like it's the super bowl

[haganekotetsu]

(lights a cigarette) nobody even wants to play toys anymore. (puts the cigarette out on a play-dough ashtray) because of work.

[haganekotetsu]

undiagnosing myself with everything. im free and happy

[haganekotetsu]

isn't it, isn't it?? hope we catch this weirdo sooner than later. that's a big waste of lemons and i've never been a big fan of those who needlessly waste perfectly good food

What the heck was up with all those lemons last night?

[haganekotetsu]

Neoteny - Asian Kung Fu Generation, World World World (2008)

[haganekotetsu]

not enough days off for you yamashiro??

what's a guy like you do at home anyway???

I would like to be able to spend more time at home, you know?

[haganekotetsu]

♡

-@beautifulbluebeast

Send ♡ to see what my muse thinks of yours

●●●○○ | ATTRACTION

how do i put this...

you're hot in a way that's like one of those nude models for figure drawing and statue sculpting.

very pretty and interesting to look at, but i wouldn't be rushing to get undressed with you any time soon. which leads me to my next point:

●●○○○ | AFFECTION

how many times have you dislocated my shoulder with a hug.... how many of my ribs have you broken. dislocated clavicles, bruised hands from handshakes, i have callouses from your high fives!!!! your affection is a one way ticket to the medical bay!!

●●○○○ | INTEREST

man, what does this one even mean? interest in what? you in general? dating?? sex, romance?? i know i'm a taken man but my imagination is free, and my imagination says we'd be a match made in hell for each other! you've got too much energy for me, man! the days i wanna spend curled up on the couch in my jammies and slippies are the days you'd wanna slap on some boots and go for a 20 mile hike i'd bet.

●●●●○ | LOYALTY

we might not be the closest of buddies but i'd always have your back if something went down! except that one time with the hot springs and the swan outfit... that was weird. don't make me arrest you while you're wearing nothing but a swan outfit again, please... you might not've been embarrassed but i was embarrassed for you

●●●●● | TRUST

i can count all the people i'd trust with my life on two hands and among those raised fingers, Konoha's Beautiful Blue Beast is chief among them!

LOW | ●●●●● | HIGH

[haganekotetsu]

Yo, checking in. Hangover's doing a number on you two lovebirds as well, or are you faring better than the others?

— @scarecrow-in-a-hatake

somewhere out there is a shrine dedicated to the best god of all time and i think i might've prayed at it once or twice but my prayers were answered......

because that god must've bestowed upon the best medic nin in town the exact formula needed to make a miracle in the form of a tablet:

they call this mighty mini medicine..

Alka-Seltzer

[haganekotetsu]

#Woke up. Found half a dozen in *my* fridge(???) #Closed it. Went back to bed.

maybe it wasn't shiranui that put those lemons in his own house... maybe it was someone else!

the same person who broke into your house last night and put, SPECIFICALLY, six lemons in your fridge, the very same number of lemons genma complained about having in his kitchen after HE went to bed drunk!

interesting... interesting.........

seems we've got a reverse lemon-bandit on the loose.

What the heck was up with all those lemons last night?

[haganekotetsu]

[haganekotetsu]

immmmmmmm

drunk! 💜

i ocer did it

And now!

I’m die

Goodsbye everybody party hard for meeee!!!

[haganekotetsu]

has anyone noticed that to clean smth u often have to get smth else dirty

massively fucked up

[haganekotetsu]

(flirting) i could be your loser boyfriend. you ever fucking thought about that??

[haganekotetsu]

Matching your freak is beautiful and all but what you really need is a boy who's infatuated with your freak. Down bad for your freak. Deeply intrigued by your freak. Eager to see more of your freak. Supportive of your freak. Gets bricked up witnessing your freak, even.

[haganekotetsu]

REASONS TO CARRY SOMEONE. ( A PROMPT LIST! )

listen, i'm back home now, i'm thinking about things, and i saw the maxton hall gifset floating around and i was like. yk what. carrying people is elite content, and gdi y'all deserve elite content! as always, DO NOT ADD OR EDIT THIS LIST! and there's a lil spicy addition under the readmore, but i left it there just in case people prefer to have a not-so-spicy version.

[ SLUMBER ]: sender picks up and carries the receiver because they're so sound asleep that they won't easily wake up.

[ INTERCEPT ]: sender picks up and carries the receiver out of the room because they're angry and on the brink of engaging in a fight with someone.

[ ASSIST ]: sender picks up and carries the receiver away for medical attention because they've been injured and can't walk easily.

[ HELP ]: sender picks up and carries the badly wounded receiver as fast as possible to the nearest hospital or the nearest place to administer urgent first-aid.

[ ELATION ]: sender scoops up the receiver and carries them away after a mutual victory, or having just received very good news (or maybe they're both just very happy for some reason!)

[ HOME ]: sender picks up the receiver to carry them over the threshold of their new home.

[ AID ]: sender finds the receiver too weak to move, and scoops them up to carry them to get some help.

[ UP ]: sender finds the receiver and picks them up to carry them a distance after learning they're unable to get up.

[ BAREFOOT ]: the sender picks up the receiver and carries them inside because they're not wearing any shoes.

[ WEARY ]: sender notices the receiver about to fall asleep during a task, and picks them up to carry them to bed so that they can actually sleep properly for once.

[ TWIRL ]: sender catches the receiver in their arms and spins them in a neat twirl just because they want to.

[ HERO ]: sender notices the receiver about to fall from a height, and manages to intervene just in time, catching them before they get hurt.

[ FLASH ]: the sender and receiver are part of a photoshoot, and in order to finish the last of the photos, the sender scoops up the receiver in their arms for the final pose.

[ TRAIN ]: during a training session (for a fight or a performance, dealer's choice!) the sender ends up holding the receiver in their arms during their session together.

[ URGENCY ]: sender carries the receiver away from danger after the receiver is revealed to be unable to move, either due to panic or injury.

[ OUT ]: sender grabs the receiver and lifts them into their arms after noticing them swaying and beginning to lose consciousness.

[ SCREAM ]: sender spots the receiver in a terrified or considerably panicked state, and picks them up to carry them to a less terrifying place to calm down.

[ LAZY ]: sender concedes to receiver's requests for a piggy-back ride home because they don't want to walk anymore, and carries them the rest of the distance home.

[ CAREFUL ]: sender gently lifts the receiver out of their seat and carries them carefully to bed after noticing they fell asleep and not wanting to waken them.

[ HASTE ]: in urgent need of getting to safety as fast as possible, the sender scoops up the receiver and starts running because it's quicker and easier to just carry them than expect them to keep pace.

[ FURTHER ]: sender, during an increasingly passionate make-out session with the receiver, suddenly takes them in their arms and carries them towards the bedroom to continue their evening in private.

[haganekotetsu]

Send ♡ to see what my muse thinks of yours

○○○○○ | ATTRACTION ○○○○○ | AFFECTION ○○○○○ | INTEREST ○○○○○ | LOYALTY ○○○○○ | TRUST

LOW | ●●●●● | HIGH