gulaashdemonlover

[gulaashdemonlover]

[I made a reservation at the restaurant of love. Where they only have tables for two. Instead of taking my order, the waiter gave me a kiss. Instead of food, I ate perfume. The love restaurant failed its recent health inspection. Because the kitchen is infested with rats. I'm not talking love rats; these are regular rats. And they're biting all the customers and staff. I got food poisoning at the love restaurant. Pretty sure it was caused by the rats. I posted a one-heart review on Yelp.com/love. Then the business owner contacted me privately. He said, 'Why'd you give my restaurant a one-heart review?' I said, 'Because it was full of rats.' He said, 'This is a small business, and this review could ruin me.' He cried over the phone and said he was trying his best.]

[gulaashdemonlover]

[gulaashdemonlover]

Jacket off

[gulaashdemonlover]

For a long time I wondered if the final TF2 comic would ever come out. For a longer time I wondered if I wanted it to. They built it up so much, hyped the Administrator's big plan so high, and then waited so long, could they possibly ever meet expectations?

I don't know if what they did was what they originally planned, or if there even was a plan, but I think they knocked it out of the park. It feels... right.

And it cemented the Administrator as one of the most terrifying villains in history. But before I discuss that, SPOILERS:

It was all pointless. None of it ever mattered.

The Gravel Wars, the fighting, the Australium, the deaths, the Classic Mercs, none of it mattered at all. Because Helen or whatever her name is just an addict getting her fix.

She kept a man alive for near enough two hundred years, trapped in the moment just before death by a thousand diseases, because she dedicated her life so thoroughly to ending him that when he finally croaked, she had nothing left. So she brought him back to suffer more. And then extended her OWN life so she could keep making him suffer.

And she doesn't even remember why. She was a child when Zepheniah Mann killed her parents, and she's something like a hundred and seventy years old now. It's been three normal lifetimes since then, and she's forgotten. But she never forgot the hate.

She sabotaged two infant's futures by raising them to be bafoons just to hurt their father. She orchestrated a forever war to spite a single man. She was prepared to keep this going until the heat death of the universe.

Do you know what would have happened if Pauling had lost her nerve and admitted they found a new stash of magic metal? With all three Mann brothers dead, she probably would have gone after Olivia. The last Mann standing, and a girl who at the time was only seven and had barely any connection to the Mann legacy at all, and probably didn't know her grandfather's name! And Helen would have gone after her and ruined her life just to make Zepheniah watch as yet another generation of Mann was ruined.

What a pointless, misspent life. What a waste of time. What an ending.

It makes what comes next all the greater. Scout and Soldier are dads with happy children, Spy still can't admit their relation but gets to be part of his grandkids' lives and he and Jeremy trust each other enough that Scout doesn't blink when he takes his mask off. Team Fortress is happy. They moved on. Found new lives.

Helen couldn't. She had all the time in the world and then some, and she just couldn't move on.

What a waste.

[gulaashdemonlover]

🚨🚨🚨THE SEVENTH COMIC IS OUT I REPEAT THE SEVENTH COMIC IS OUT🚨🚨🚨

THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!!!

[gulaashdemonlover]

The cycle continues lmaoooooo 😭

[gulaashdemonlover]

everyone say thank you hideo kojima

[gulaashdemonlover]

formulating attack patterns to terrorize my overworked girlfriend with

[gulaashdemonlover]

[gulaashdemonlover]

me and the gang

[gulaashdemonlover]

[gulaashdemonlover]

Turn based sex. Take as long as you need to think of a strategy.

[gulaashdemonlover]

Ooooh this new Vanripper game is already so good!

[gulaashdemonlover]

A new, free game by Vanripper: Awaria!

He's already shown how great of an animator he is (seriously, go watch Daystone), but if there was any doubt that he wasn't just as great at game design, it's now been dispelled.

The last two stages especially are tough as nails; but it's great fun, with brilliant art, music, and gameplay that I can best describe as a bullet-hell maintenance game? Eh, the best way to understand it is to see it in action.

You can get it on Steam or Itch.io!

[gulaashdemonlover]

Helltaker had the indomitable charisma of the Johnny bravos and space dandies of the world, rolling 20s on charisma to just walk into hell and take all the cute demon girls.

Awaria engineer however is a 0 intelligence girl who doesn't seem to fully understand the danger involved in repairing a shockingly terrible no osha compliance maintenence tunnel system infested with ghosts. That's the vibe I get from her cheerful glare as she repairs the machines and kisses the ghosts. Like a spongebob.

[gulaashdemonlover]

Vanripper took 4 years to develop Awaria because the story intended for you to transition in between Helltaker and Awaria

[gulaashdemonlover]

WE ARE SO BACK