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green things are better than red things

is what she always used to say. really, she mostly only said it when she was talking about salsa. but she said it in my head so, so many more times. i hear it when i pick up pencils, nail polish, hell, even the paints for my room. here i am, echoing, green things are better than red things. the red part of me hates the idea that she hasnt echoed anything ive said in probably months. but the green part of me knows that we will grow to live with that eventually. 

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for her I would split my heart like an orange and give her the plumpest parts

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it isn’t particularly nice of time to move on, but it is very kind 

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girl help I'm literally collecting dust on the shelf you placed me on

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you’re ripping this friendship apart shred by shred with your teeth. the words you spout widen the cracks. the remains are right under your nose and you don’t even notice. do you care?

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wowee!! thanks for making me cry

Hear me out, but I think there was supposed to be more to the scene where Jamie gives Dani the moonflower.

“I’m actually pretty in love with you, turns out.”

Dani smiles, but it’s a smile that says “I know this, you dork, but I’ll never get sick of hearing it.” It looks like she’s expecting something else. I don’t think it’s the first time Jamie’s said “I love you.”

Jamie goes into the scene nervous. She flips the sign to closed, her voice is shaky. But she sighs with relief when they kiss, and it seems like Dani is answering a question as she initiates. So, what did Jamie ask that had her so worried?

In the next clip, they’re building the bed

Now, on the flip side: it IS the first time Jamie has said she loves Dani. We know Jamie struggles to express herself. People keep leaving her. She hasn’t had anyone to rely on since, well, probably ever, really. She struggles with her self-worth, her failures. She sees herself as irredeemable. Damaged goods. Jamie doesn’t say “I love you” casually because, to her, love is a commitment. I will be there for you and I’m trusting you to be there for me.

And, as we all know, Jamie doesn’t trust easily.

From Dani’s smile, though, it’s clear she already knows Jamie loves her. This isn’t news. Jamie shows her love quietly. By sleeping on the couch between the Peter Quint and Dani. By joking and teasing and treading lightly when Dani has bad days. By not getting upset when Dani burns dinner or makes bad tea or gets distracted.

It’s important to Jamie that Dani knows she’s serious. So she closes the store and presents Dani with the flower that surrounded them when she allowed herself to be vulnerable the first time in the forest at Bly.

“They’re really rare, you know.”

Their love is rare. People who are worth the effort are rare. Jamie showing herself is rare.

Dani understands the gravity of what Jamie, a very private person, doing. Jamie doesn’t show off. In fact, just about everything about her is designed to blend it. Neutral-dark tones, distant attitude, hats. But, when she presents the flower to Dani, she’s wearing white, and her hair is down. The shop is beautiful and open and white and well-lit; the opposite of bly, really.

Moonflowers aren’t easy to grow, just like trust. It’s taken time for them to build up to this moment.

The difficulty of the act is not lost on Dani, and she, naturally, rewards Jamie for her bravery with a kiss (and probably other things as they scurry to the back of the shop).

In conclusion, interpretations are fun.

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*distant sniffling* the vibes......immaculate

6. with dani and jamie would be so cute 🥺 like a lil vermont winter fic

for you, anon! I altered the wording ever so slightly, but the concept is identical. I hope you enjoy :)

you can also read on AO3

~~~

Their flat is located a few streets off from the center of town, close enough to walk but far enough to provide a sense of distance from the bustle of the main drag. Tonight, they set out just after sundown to ensure good seats to what Dani has affectionately dubbed, “the greatest holiday spectacular to ever grace the streets of Bennington,” and what Jamie has deemed, “an entirely American embarrassment.”

It’s their third winter in Vermont, and this year, The Leafling has generously sponsored half of Bennington High School’s Marching Seahorses’ winter uniforms in exchange for a full page ad in their concert programmes for a year and a sign carried at the front of the annual holiday parade. Or, rather, the kids had come to the shop with instruments, a flyer, and an unrehearsed elevator pitch, and Dani had been utterly charmed.

Keep reading

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AAAA

Can you imagine the relief Jamie felt every time she saw Dani coke home? Every time she saw her through The Leafling's doors, every time she woke up and felt Dani on the bed, snoring a little bit like she always does but cute as all hell nonetheless. That shaky relief that Jamie could never solidify until the love of her life was in her arms, until she was kissing her in the back of the shop or in the kitchen. One day at a time. One more day. Funny thing, that relief. It's the opposite of losing a bit of yourself every day. That relief grows every time. The more time goes on the less of a chance there is for your love to come home safe and whole. So you become a little more grateful every time that happens. You're grateful because it's one more day, one more day to make memories and spend time with the one you love. You grow. Just like a plant. Just like a flower. But Dani's and Jamie's relationship was that special kind, the moonflower. So beautiful, but grows so quickly and dies just as fast. Jamie felt that relief, she felt that relief hard, harder than most. So they grew. Fast. And their relationship had a beautiful bloom, a flower shop, a house, a civil union, but they knew it wouldn't last forever. Nothing does. And then that one day. That day that Jamie woke up, and there was no snoring beauty laying beside her in bed. There was nothing but a note on the bedside table. The relief stopped growing. It was like holding your breath and waiting to be shot in the head, and the bullet doesn't come until years later. The most beautiful thing to me is that Jamie began holding her breath in a new way after that morning. She kept her door open a crack, and she fell asleep every night not in that bad but in a chair, placed carefully in front of that open door. She waited for Dani to come back every single night.

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oh you're smarter than me? oh really? everyone is you're not special get in line bisspaby

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I want to mourn her death. I want to honor her. I want to pay tribute to who she was as a woman, as a mother, as a lawyer, as a fighter, as a wife, as a justice, as a patriot. 

I want to mourn her and celebrate her and thank her for everything that she did, all the decisions that she made that helped me grow up in an America where I was safe to pursue all the things I wanted. 

Instead the first emotion I felt wasn’t sadness, or humility, or solemnity. It was fear. Chill down the spine, tears in the eyes, heart racing, muscle clenching fear.  

And I will never forgive them for that. 

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Me : *sees pretty girl*

Me : *dies a little*