gotta-pet-em-all

[gotta-pet-em-all]

Mine use their pokeballs as a way to take a break from things. Walking around all day gets exhausting, so does socializing. It's like they have little rooms to hang out in.

But my weird trait is that I don't walk around with my full team. I leave maybe half of them napping on my bed or hanging out in my room when I go out and about.

Am I the only one here who basically never uses a pokeball?

I mean, I have them for emergencies but the idea of keeping my pokemon in stasis for any length of time is repulsive

[gotta-pet-em-all]

I'd follow that. Grisp gentol

I should make a sideblog called “gotta grisp them all” or something where I just post pictures of me grabbing and holding wild Pokémon

[gotta-pet-em-all]

oh fuck im baby

sometimes i think pokemon dont comprehend that humans are our own thing and just. full on think we are very very stupid pokemon

~this post brought to you by a very maternal nidoqueen trying to feed me pre-chewed food because i forgot to eat

[gotta-pet-em-all]

TRANS POLL

Alright, getting curious about some stuff since not sure if thing I'm noticing is just me in my circle, loudness level of groups, or other stuff. So... let's check something.

Yeah, transfemme and being a gal who's trans ain't equivalent, same with the transmasc and dude who's trans, but I need to condense here. This is going to be too complicated to adequately capture in a poll anyways. Like, there's at least both, neither in multiple ways, secret third option, and other stuff in non-binary up there. Just pick whatever's closest to your personal ID.

[gotta-pet-em-all]

you ever think they don't actually respect our authority and just see us as very weak babies who are nonetheless good at strategizing

sometimes i think pokemon dont comprehend that humans are our own thing and just. full on think we are very very stupid pokemon

~this post brought to you by a very maternal nidoqueen trying to feed me pre-chewed food because i forgot to eat

[gotta-pet-em-all]

sometimes i think pokemon dont comprehend that humans are our own thing and just. full on think we are very very stupid pokemon

~this post brought to you by a very maternal nidoqueen trying to feed me pre-chewed food because i forgot to eat

[gotta-pet-em-all]

why are there men on this island with better tits than me

[gotta-pet-em-all]

Couldn't you just get toys made for garchomp?

My raticate goes through chews very fast. I suspect it's due to her high level, but Kanto doesn't supply anything hardier than what we've already tried that's fitting for her teeth because of how few people raise strong raticate. Any chew toy recommendations for rodent pokemon with large incisors from other regions?

[gotta-pet-em-all]

the nice thing about having thighs like mine is that every Pokémon with soft little pawsies wants to make biscuits on them

Skinny bitches envy my rizz

[gotta-pet-em-all]

….and yet another glimpse into an alternate version of myself is open to me via backreading.

I. You’re telling me I had the genetics for massive tits this entire time? I could have been a scene kid? She was so confident in herself, and…

No. There’s no changing the past. But if anything. I’m more convinced than ever that I want to keep in touch with aunt Charlie. Sure, she didn’t want a kid, but then, neither did my bio mom, and it’s pretty damn clear who did a better job here.

[gotta-pet-em-all]

I, uh. I think we’re gonna be okay. The two of us, I mean. …right. I think I promised a picture, didn’t I? Here you go!

[An image is attached. The faces are obscured by emojis for safety, but you can tell they’re smiling, standing close to each other. 

Oranclaw is reasonably tall for her age, and unfortunately well developed in the chest despite wearing a shirt several sizes too big. She’s wearing stylistically mismatched socks and a black tee with a fat anthropomorphic lycanroc on it in neon colors. Kandi bead strings decorate her belt loops, and there’s a folding cane sticking out of her bag.

Emberstar is clearly cut from the same cloth, with broad shoulders and ample curves, dressed in heavy work clothes stained with grease at the hems. Her shirt is unbuttoned, and she wears a baseball cap for the Lacunosa Flareon. 

At the forefront of the picture, as if sniffing the camera, is a mincinno.]

[gotta-pet-em-all]

Again. John Calvin himself is not going to attend your pity party and your pain was not in fact predestined. It's just the natural result of you being a stubborn ass. Go to the pokemart and you can get the little bottles for like 200 poke.

there is nothing inherently noble about suffering, or being in pain. it just means you're in pain. and that sucks.

I know that. It’s when I let the pain bring me down that it becomes embarrassing. And don’t you look at me like that, Lan Zhan— you have no right to tell me off! Not when you’d rather lose a leg than break a damn rule!

That still isn’t… good. For either of you.

Don’t concern yourself over this, Wen Ning.

[gotta-pet-em-all]

I mean. When you're ready to come home, you're always welcome here. Just because I wasn't ready for a baby doesn't mean I'll reject a person. You live here, too. And it's okay if you're not ready yet. But I'll be waiting for you. I promise.

Hey, uh. Kiddo? You... wanted more honesty. So. The reason I haven't let you have more pokemon besides Lola is that I'm not qualified to take care of 'em and wasn't sure if you were.

I guess you're old enough that... you're not just the kid I take care of. You're old enough to have your own responsibilities and contribute. And that means it's time I started treating you as a member of the household.

You wanted more pokemon, right? If you can pick it up and carry it home, it's yours.

[gotta-pet-em-all]

....you want me to pick something small and holdable. That's why you made that stipulation, right? Joke's on you, though, that's my favorite type!

What did you. What did you mean, carry it home?

Hey, uh. Kiddo? You... wanted more honesty. So. The reason I haven't let you have more pokemon besides Lola is that I'm not qualified to take care of 'em and wasn't sure if you were.

I guess you're old enough that... you're not just the kid I take care of. You're old enough to have your own responsibilities and contribute. And that means it's time I started treating you as a member of the household.

You wanted more pokemon, right? If you can pick it up and carry it home, it's yours.

[gotta-pet-em-all]

Hey, uh. Kiddo? You... wanted more honesty. So. The reason I haven't let you have more pokemon besides Lola is that I'm not qualified to take care of 'em and wasn't sure if you were.

I guess you're old enough that... you're not just the kid I take care of. You're old enough to have your own responsibilities and contribute. And that means it's time I started treating you as a member of the household.

You wanted more pokemon, right? If you can pick it up and carry it home, it's yours.

[gotta-pet-em-all]

Wow. You guys are seriously mentally ill. Just take the damn painkillers and move on with your life? Yeah, it's annoying, but no one's gonna throw you a party and invite John Calvin himself to tell you how noble and cool you are for suffering.

there is nothing inherently noble about suffering, or being in pain. it just means you're in pain. and that sucks.

I know that. It’s when I let the pain bring me down that it becomes embarrassing. And don’t you look at me like that, Lan Zhan— you have no right to tell me off! Not when you’d rather lose a leg than break a damn rule!

That still isn’t… good. For either of you.

Don’t concern yourself over this, Wen Ning.

[gotta-pet-em-all]

A kid's a big responsibility. Changing diapers, losing sleep... I wasn't ready for it. For the burden. And before you throw a fit over me calling you a burden, we're all burdensome, that's the human condition.

I asked for help not because you were too much, but because I knew I wasn't enough for you. It's like... conflicting accessibility needs? I know I taught you about that one. Sometimes it's no one's fault. Sometimes you just struggle to be around someone and have to make the most of it.

But I had help. And I raised a pretty damn incredible kid. I'm proud of you, okay? No matter what.

Oranclaw, right? Why don’t you just go back home?

I don't. I don't want to go somewhere I'm not wanted! I'm tired of being somewhere I'm not wanted!

And now. I don't know if they're lying but I don't care, those fucking Plasma idiots might know where my mom is, but she abandoned me! And she's a terrible person! Garbage! I mean, I kinda suspected for a while, it's not like this was a surprise, it's just the horrible cherri on top of a shit sandwich!

I hate all of this! I should just become a cryptid in the woods and mug people.