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[goshyesthemiddleman]

So I've got a kinda nit-picky Middleman question I've always wondered about and since I'm in the middle (no pun intended) of a rewatch and you're answering questions, I can't help but ask: how much time passed between Raveena's death and Wendy's recruitment?

hmm… not sure truth be told, but if you held my feet to the fire, I’d say at least five years, since we know there was a middleboy before wendy came along (and his tragic fate is described in the comic book universe).

[goshyesthemiddleman]

this season - give the gift of the middleman!

the complete middleman oeuvre - comic books, dvds, and other related arcana - are all available at www.o2stk.com! share the middleman with someone you middle-love!

[goshyesthemiddleman]

thank you @cultfaction for calling “the middleman” a cult tv essential! http://cultfaction.com/2015/11/11/cult-tv-essentials-the-middleman/

[goshyesthemiddleman]

over the years, @i09 has been a friend and advocate of “the middleman” – and today they pay us what i consider to be an apex compliment buy featuring our parallel universe facial hair in their exhaustive investigation of “the eight types of expository beards” thanks guys!

http://io9.com/the-8-types-of-expository-beards-1738155250

[goshyesthemiddleman]

“Why would anyone want to steal a tuba?”

Middleman gifs!

[goshyesthemiddleman]

"What happened doesn't change anything" and MM/Lacey

(ETA: OH HEY GUESS WHAT THESE ARE SUPPOSED TO BE DIALOGUE ONLY AND I JUST NOTICED THAT WHOOPS ALREADY WRITTEN OH WELL sorry ‘bout that here have some fic anyway)

“What happened doesn’t change anything,” he says. Their legs swing in time off the edge of the roof, their heels bouncing off the brick.

Her voice is small but her grip on his hand is tight: “How can you say that?”

“Because you won’t remember this in the morning.” He speaks to the stars, to the full moon; she can see his grim smile in the light it reflects. “In the morning, you’ll be dating Perfect Warren again and I’ll just be Wendy’s terrible boss who keeps her late at work and who occasionally - oddly - walks her to her door.”

“I won’t think that.”

“You will.”

“But today.” Her knuckles are white around his. “We had today. I remember today.”

“It was just one day.”

“A gift?”

A punishment, he thinks. But he nods for her anyway.

“But it all goes back to the way it was.” It’s not a question this time. She knows better than to ask now. She’s squeezing his hand so tight he can’t feel his fingers anymore.

“The way it’s supposed to be, yes. Ultimate sacrifices aren’t so easily unmade.”

They stay on the roof until she falls asleep, slumped against his shoulder. He carries her downstairs to the loft and leaves before she wakes.

[goshyesthemiddleman]

me: *takes a deep breath*

me: i lo-

anyone who has spent five seconds around me ever: yes, you love the middleman, we know, you love the middleman so much, it’s the light of your life, you love it so much, you just love the middleman, we KNOW , you love the middleman you fucking love the middleman ok we know, we get it, YOU LOVE THE MIDDLEMAN. WE GET IT.

[goshyesthemiddleman]

the Middleman

The Middleman’s Best Beer:

1 (18.25 ounce) package yellow cake mix1 (3.5 ounce) package instant vanilla pudding mix1 cup beer¼ cup vegetable oil4 eggs

Mix the mixes and put in a mixer to mix further.

Mix in the rest of the stuff until it is well mixed.

Bake at 350 degrees in whatever kind of well-oiled pan you choose for about 50 minutes (and all the alcohol is gone).

Serve with an ice cold glass of milk.

Dubbie’s Delicious Drink, as made for her by Lacey after a Dark Day.

What’s left of the rum you got for Christmas

2 liter bottle of “Dr. Peppy” store brand soda

“Crushed ice” (if that actually means ‘freezer burn chipped off of 10 year old frozen dinners’, well, who’s going to judge?)

Fresh, slightly bruised cherries liberated from a grocery store that was just going to thrown them out, can you believe it?

Pour all the rum you’ve got into a clean, empty jar.  (We only drink from transparent containers in this illegal sublet so as not to repeat the Paint Water Incident of senior year)

Fill the jar the rest of the way up with soda

Add all the cherries that’ll fit.

Serve with bendy straw.

[goshyesthemiddleman]

If you saved his life using kung fu, he owes you what the Chinese sifus, the Japanese sensei, and the Jedi Knights refer to as a “life debt”.

[goshyesthemiddleman]

I kinda ship him with Wendy but I mostly ship him with me.

[goshyesthemiddleman]

[goshyesthemiddleman]

Also, technically, since The Middleman is owned by Disney, it’s technically a Marvel property. Maybe the Middleman will show up in Captain America: Civil War or something.

Javier Grillo-Marxuach (Middleman Supreme: Javier Grillo-Marxuach on the Life of a TV Writer)

[goshyesthemiddleman]

a thought just occurred to me. how does the middleman keep his milk cold when it's in the flask? does the middle mobile have a middle fridge? this feels important

the flask has portable black hole technology – when the middleman drinks his milk, it actually comes out of a very large keggerator full of cow squirt back at o2stk hq.

[goshyesthemiddleman]

[goshyesthemiddleman]

This jacket says something about… about me, the man I choose to be. So what does this uniform say about me, other than you’re my boss? If you feel you need to make a change, then make a change. But make it count. Really? I think you’ve earned it.

The Middleman 1x09: The Obsolescent Cryogenic Meltdown

[goshyesthemiddleman]

You set off a truth bomb? Yep! I thought we weren’t supposed to use Middlegear to solve our personal problems. Well, there’s personal, Dubbie, and then there’s personal.

The Middleman 1x06: The Boyband Superfan Interrogation

[goshyesthemiddleman]

Words are the enemy, only action is real. We are what we do, not what we say.

The Middleman 1x07: The Cursed Tuba Contingency