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As a certified lover of the monastery infiltration quest in kcd1 I can't even convey how very pleased I am that kcd2 is getting a DLC that's apparently just doing that again.

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Theresa dons Cuman armor and brings Bianca to safety

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i can’t be the only one who thinks of this bloke whenever i see žižka

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more kcd2 modern au doodles! Hans is a tennis pro and the devils pack show up to all his matches very supportive (and drunk) :)

(henry is playing geometry dash)

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Mentally in shambles over the fact Warhorse wrote Hans Capon to be wildly obsessed with the wordplay and melodramatic gesticulation, the performance, of romance. So much so, in fact, that Hans -- a character soon revealed to be a profoundly and chronically lonely person -- attempts multiple times (in KCD1) to force himself to fall in love through gesture. He goes about this by throwing himself into overblown and meticulously executed courtship steps, insisting to himself this talking and gifting and formulaic flirtation (including sex) is what romance is, and that it will lead him to storybook feelings of love, to resolve his loneliness. Of course, it never does. It goes awry or fizzles out, and when he doesn't fall madly in love, Hans immediately loses interest and discards these former "loves of his life." Of course it does not resolve anything. It can't; that isn't how love works.

[KCD2 MAJOR ROMANCE SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT.]

Warhorse set this up with such diligence, skill, and care...

Only to knock it the fuck out of the park by delivering a transformational romance with Henry in KCD2 that is deliberately and utterly stripped of wordplay, courtship, and artifice. So much so that all Henry & Hans's flirting is done in the normal conversations, and the explicitly romantic lines deliver only plainspoken affirmations of truth, devotion, kindness, and loyalty.

I know some people feel this is not romantically satisfying, that it does not scratch the Romance Genre itch. I get that some players would have preferred more courtship, more I am dazzled by your beauty moments, and more sexiness to the sex. I understand; those rollicking moments are fun, and we had more of them in KCD1, when we we did not have the option to allow the characters in question to act on them. But I also disagree, deeply, with the takeaway that this approach cheapens the romance of Hans & Henry's story. On the contrary, I think this differentiates the temporary chase of romance (flirtation, pursuit, gesture, courting) from the everyday perpetual action of romance (being the Person of the one you love above all, constantly).

IMO, Hans and Henry got to build their puppy-love-affection in KCD1 through flirtations they did not treat with much seriousness, because flirtation is not serious expression of love. You can have these flirtations on top of and alongside the rest, sure. But it's just dressing and the opening of a door to something more truthful, more adult and much more consequential, a stage that is broken wide open in KCD2 when they face the possibility of losing each other over and over. And that, I would argue, is why Warhorse (and Henry/Hans) needed to pull back on the flirtation and push it to the sidelines in KCD2, to now treat the romantic performance like the dressing it always was, as just one component to romantic love and not its entirety or its essence. Because when we begin to understand the difference, when we reach the maturity of deep-seated love that only rarely runs beneath flirtation, we reach the kind of love that provides deep constancy. And it changes your entire life by changing the way you understand the world.

That, I argue, is why the Hans romance in KCD2 takes the shape and tone it does, and why focusing more on the old KCD1 fun-flirts they used to have would have diminished its potency. KCD2 is that ultimate stage in which Henry has shown Hans what it means to genuinely love someone, beneath and beyond the performance, perhaps for the first time in his life. And when the immensity of this love hits you, the enormity of its happiness and of the pending grief inherent to being living things who love each other, no language is sufficient.

And it's such an appropriate ending - even Hans Capon comes to rest with the understanding that there are no gifts or gestures or words to tie a pretty little bow on what it means.

What a fucking fantastic conclusion and what a grown-up take on love.

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Oh, hello, little princess!

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💀🕊️🔥 art for hard mode looks sexy

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I keep thinking about The Kiss (as one does) and while there are a lot of great interpretations about why Henry looks so disgusted after the kiss, I think there's one that I think needs more attention — that Henry isn't disgusted with Hans, but with himself.

First, there's his reaction to putting his hand on Hans'. He stands up almost immediately, as soon as Hans smiles at him, as though he's aware he crossed a line. Then, of course, there's the kiss — sure, he pushes Hans away at the end, but when Hans pulls him into the kiss, he's all too willing, embracing Hans in return. And that's where I think his disgust comes in: he realises now that what he feels for Hans is more than that of a friend, and while Hans' affection is clear from the outside, it may not be the case from Henry's POV. For all he knows, Hans didn't mean the kiss in that way — sure, it was intense, but they're both half-mad from hunger. Hans is not in his right mind, and Henry is taking advantage. I don't even know how much Henry hears Hans' apology at first. It's only when he turns around and sees that Hans is upset too that all the pieces finally come together. Hans really does love him, the kiss really did mean something, and Henry will be damned if he runs away and loses everything.

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last hunt before going back to rattay

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i love henry's little embarrassed face so much.....

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Excerpt from a fic I'm working on, set c. 1410 after Hans has assumed control of Rattay (after having to literally fight it out with Hanush) and Henry is serving as his captain of the guard.

“So kiss me,” said Hans, and Henry obeyed, lowering his head to meet Hans’. His hands found Henry’s face and drew him closer, lips parting as the kiss deepened and became something far more urgent and desperate. This was the kiss of the battlefield, the fierce joy and terror that came of fighting at the side of the one you loved best in all the world. Not since that glorious day on the fields outside Merhojed where their men had put Hanush and his forces to route for good had Henry kissed Hans like this — almost eight months ago now. After the battle, battered but alive, he had dragged Hans off into the nearby forest where, in the quiet shade of the greenwood, he’d pressed Hans up against an oak and kissed him with such fervour that Hans thought his heart might stop in his chest. Throwing off his gauntlets, his hands had found their way beneath Henry’s gambeson and mail shirt to slip inside his braies, grasping his backside and hauling him close, stifling a groan at the press of Henry’s plated thigh between his own. Duty had eventually forced them to part before any further foolishness might take place, but late at night, in the privacy of his own chamber, Hans often imagined how that afternoon might have proceeded without interruption.

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i just realized that during the reckoning quest when speaking to sam, his dialogue changes just slightly depending on whether or not you romance hans....

if you romance hans:

and this is if you don't romance hans:

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At the Devil’s Den post Suchdol

NSFW version on Twitter https://x.com/eliyenlavellan/status/1912388265874694528?s=46

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Also Samuel using his age to pulls rank absolutely killed me like yea they’re siblings for sure. And sorry Sam but everyone definitely treat you like you’re Henry’s younger brother.

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theresaposting will continue until morale improves

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Presenting Lord Hans Capon of Pirkstein:

+ Bonus Hansry