gloriousfckingpurpose

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

fuck baby ur so hot i wanna do the dishes with u and make u hot tea when ur sick

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

if i was in jurassic park i'd be fine because the dinosaurs would love me and therefore not eat me

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

Having "a lot" of followers on tumblr is funny because probably 80% of them are ghost blogs who haven't been on here in like a decade.

It's like, no no, those aren't my followers, that's a graveyard! I'm the caretaker of a thousands of tombs. I love them, but they've been dead for seven years.

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

Being a bi guy quite possibly the funniest sexuality like dammmnnnn I know who John Waters is and jerk it to twinks in panties but I got a coffee date with Hetero Jessica from work at 3 thats her name heteroooo jessica thats her name folks thats what we call her hertero jessica

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

it's destabilizing my worldview that according to all reports the wicked movie is actually good. what do you mean. big-budget star-studded movie adaptations of hit stage musicals are supposed to be bad. that is the way of the world. I think this is one of the seals of the apocalypse. they need to get back on set and film a version that's bad Right now.

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

jurassic park has a good philosophical message but unfortunately the only thing i ever take away from watching jurassic park is "god i wish i could go to jurassic park." like yeah it's a blatantly obvious don't create the torment nexus scenario, but this torment nexus has DINOSAURS.

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

i think its pathetic that journalists and even some casual speakers call twitter "X" now. weak fish behaviour. you dont have to play along

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

Everyone is so weird about people who cry easily. Fellas, is it evil and manipulative to *checks notes* have an involuntary stress response?

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

colors

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

Bro I fucking love the DB Cooper case nothing about this whole situation sounds real. None of the passengers on the plane realized they were being hijacked until the plane landed two hours after it was supposed to and the fbi showed up with suitcases full of money. The note about the bomb almost went unnoticed because the flight attendant thought she was being sexually harassed so she didn't read it. One of the main suspects was the first trans woman in Washington to have a sex change operation. A reporter who was so dead set on his suspect that he brought him to court was so upset about being wrong that he went catatonic and was treated with electroshock therapy and it WORKED. There's been multiple "I'm DB Cooper" death confessions. He never even SAID his name was DB Cooper. Either he got away with a million bucks in today's money and the most iconic and harmless crime American history or he impaled himself on a pine tree while falling a zillion miles an hour in the dark while clutching duffel bags full of cash and either option is equally hilarious. He wore a clip on tie. He committed an act of sky piracy. What in the fucking looney toons

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

hate coming to terms with things. i should be able to cast a fireball instead

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

coworker asks if i like harry potter and i have to make a disco elysium skill check to come up with a response

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

Hey, no homo, but I am sitting on the broken swing set out back in the perfect, quiet, 2:00am blackness and picturing the softness of your voice and the darkness of your eyes with such perfect and terrible clarity that it feels like I'm choking on my own heartbeat.

[gloriousfckingpurpose]

They are familiar things but I am a stranger now