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Ooooh, Pharma suffering through one too many unsatisfied heats alone on Delphi, all cold and swollen. Sure he can deal with it manually but it’s never quite as satisfying as a person. 

He can’t ask First Aid or Ambulon either. He is not going to be that kind of creepy surgeon who pressures his staff. Though the thought of it may lead to some fantasies about Ratchet walking in on him and pressuring him into it and Pharma may get a little lost in the sauce at the thought of Ratchet bending him over and assisting poor little nurse Pharma with it. He is pining and shaking through overload any time he plays old recordings of Ratchet’s voice, but even that stops being satisfying the longer time passes with no call or even email from him.

This eventually evolves into him just ignoring it by force stopping the cycle as long as possible, especially when the added stress of Tarn’s deal happens. All this escalates into Pharma being stuck on Luna-1 post-being tortured for months with experiments, having just rebuilt himself from scratch after being disintegrated on and off until Tyrest got it right. Now he’s playing up his mad doctor side which gets him left pretty much alone by everyone. 

So he’s alone in his lab when his heat protocols start activating and he can’t stop it so he’s shaky collapsed gasping next to his notes, trying to think through the fever on how he can force stop with tools and force himself to crawl over. His panel snaps open because he’s so swollen and exhausted and he starts giggle-crying because of course this happens too. What’s next the Cons walking in on it? Clearly the universe hates him.

Then, to his horror, the door does open but it’s Star Saber which is a relief because he’s basically sexless and so repressed he’ll be too put off to try anything. Obviously. Pharma dealt with plenty of people like that before. They loved making comments at him after all for being a jet in medicine. He snarls at him trying to pull as much dignity as possible to help him up so he could resolve the issue and get back to the work.

Star Saber is strangely quiet and obedient, easily picking Pharma up and carrying him to his bed without any hesitation, grabbing some coolant, and only stopping when ordered to bring him a box and he looks inside it to see the contents.

Instead of bringing Pharma his toys though, he settles on the bed between Pharma’s legs and grabs them both in his hands, saying that imitations are not needed and are against Primus’s vision. Pharma starts giggling again because of course, why wouldn’t this happen now right when he thought he was going to get off easy. Star Saber’s face mask retracts and he goes face first into the valve before Pharma can react. Pharma didn’t realize that the Circle of Light worships the fighter-creator aspect of Primus and is, in fact, a sex cult. And Star Saber is a very devoted worshiper. 

Something he is happily demonstrating by pressing himself as close as he can and licking and sucking and lathing every swollen nod he can touch. Pharma whites out through the first of many overloads. Two more riding Star Saber’s face, the last of which had Pharma’s legs wrapped so tightly around his helm he thought he heard something crack while he rocked into Star Saber’s tongue grinding his outside node on the other’s nose. Then he got flipped over and wings nibbled and worshiped as fingers as large as some spikes dove inside him and found his lubrication glands to milk them so thoroughly the pleasure went into pain only to circle back. Only when Star Saber had managed to get the worst of the edge off leaving Pharma pliant, plush, and them both soaked did his spike come into play delightfully stretching with ridges and biolight that were designed to press against inside nodes and line up charge outputs.

They both don’t leave until the swelling has gone down enough for the entrance of the gestation tank to become visible again and Pharma is very thoroughly satisfied in every way possible. Including ones he didn’t think of resulting directly in two little carry ons now that Star Saber is smug in a very self-righteous way about.

Pharma finally gets a satisfied heat but the pay off is Star Saber basically attached to him and more than willing to “top him off” any time the bump stops being visible despite Pharma’s repeated corrections that no sex throughout carrying is not actually required for health. But at least this crazy mech he’s stuck with this time mainly wants to give him the best overloads he’s ever had, tell him what a gift he is, and is willing to listen to him ramble happily about the miracle cures he’s making. No torture this time. Unless you count the occasional edging. 

(Pharma can have a “nice” thing for once.)

AEHRGG... Pharma pussy indulgence...

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Grimlock's amazing popularity as a Decepticon due to his stamina

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Thundercracker is determined to figure out how to have sex with his new girlfriend (!) Marissa

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Sexy vivisection Ratchma deserves further examination

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Sexualize Phase seven

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Return of Medic healing transfluid but it is Tarnma

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Sex Cult Part 2

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Overlord kidnaps Glitch for Megatron and never forgives the little bastard for tazing him which obviously means he has to take Tarn's virginity the moment he gets the chance as payback and likes it a little too much.

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Deadlock's medic kink leads to him fucking his future husband's ex-husband on the Second Worst Day of Pharma's life.

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Drafts are just being released live into the wild and will be expanded upon later.

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Orgasms help treat migraines. Do something with this about Prowl.

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Okay, so what if one of the bots really, really loves blow jobs. Like something about having something in their mouth makes them horny. So they starting getting modifications. Adding nodes that enhance their pleasure along the top of their mouth and back their intake. Make their intake more flexible. Make the gag reflex manual. Fucking their mouth feels as good to them as their valve and they enjoy it immensely.

Now say this person is Pharma, and he got all these in anticipation for Ratchet and with some idle fantasies about being tucked under Ratchet’s desk spike warming. Unfortunately for Pharma those fantasies never become reality and instead he gets Tarn.

Tarn, who decides to offer alternate payment as a humiliation thing he expects to be rejected for another worse task. Pharma grits his teeth and accepts, not expecting it to feel that good. He's never gotten to put it to use.

Tarn pulls him up and . He obviously can't resist poking them now that he has the chance despite Pharma’s protest. He has two fingers inside Pharma's mouth accidentally pressing and massaging the nodes on the top, stroking them gently in fascination until Pharma is drooling and sucking on the fingers hoping to move this along. They are both surprised when he moans.

Tarn curious forces his mouth open to see the blinking nodes and recognizes the modification and cannot resist making a comment especially given how embarrassed Pharma is about his now obvious arousal. Tarn immediately changes his mind on what exactly they are going to do because he wants to test it out.

And worse–in Pharma’s opinion–Pharma wants to let him.

The night ends with Pharma attempting deep thrusting as much as he can while Tarn slowly fucks him making sure to drag his spike along the line of nodes until Pharma is the one overloading first and then Tarn fucks his throat while he cries through it and moans through Tarn's overload because the electricity from that shoots into Pharma and sends him right to the peak again.

The whole time Pharma has been rubbing his soaked thighs together and ignoring how painfully pressurized his own spike is behind his panel.

(The next time Tarn is prepared for a much longer session inviting Pharma to the Tyranny in lieu of one payment while Tarn has a pile of paperwork to finish and a cushion set up perfect for kneeling under his desk.)

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Yes, Past Me, I remember exactly where we going with this incredibly descriptive draft.

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While MegOP for sure has super messed up fighting biting best sex of their lives which is a metaphor for murder and the attempted murder is a metaphor for sex and ProwlOP has power imbalance unsafe, unsane, consensual going for it, MegProwl can never have sex or be on screen too long because Megatron has already shown he will seduce people to his side and brainwash/break them and Prowl had terrible tastes in exes AND leaders.

If they had lined up on just the wrong occasion Megatron's inability to let exes go, seduction plans, and Prowl's taste would have lined up to result either in incredible sex OR terrible sex that either way they would never stop having and with Prowl helping them the Decepticons would have won because he comes with Mesothulas and their wouldn't have been a moral crisis stopping him from letting the worst/best Shockwave/Prowl/Mesothulas shared planning sessions ending the war.

Soundwave would have hated all of it.

The MegProwl breakup when Megatron doesn't stop like he said he would ends in a whole other mess, at least three cults, the loss of five planets, Prowl's broken pelvis, Optimus as both of their rebounds, and Cybertron getting nuked and then remade in a week.

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Not coherent enough for full posts, but damn if I am not filling up my drafts with one liners to expand later.

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After all she (and Bumblebee and Wheeljack and everyone going through it) did to help Starscream along his redemption arc, Windblade should have gotten a week long sexcation and the best orgasms of her life with her recently released from prison almost deceased token evil boyfriend.