girlydemise

[girlydemise]

People conceptualize egg spotting as this vapid-ass "tee hee, this guy likes the wrong video games for a man, so he must be a giiiirl~" nonsense when in actuality it's like

Here's a reoccurring pattern of fucking trauma responses that we KNOW is common in repressing trans women

And we recognize it

[girlydemise]

also a poem from the new, unreleased collection. very possibly my own all-time favourite.

[girlydemise]

you mustn’t let your mother know of my vast fortune of cotton candy i keep in the walls next to this stupid money

[girlydemise]

This is what they did to the matrix

I Saw The Money Grow

[girlydemise]

sucks that "incel" is just like a generic insult now synonymous with "virgin" bc if people had much of an idea of what incel ideology actually entails, we could have a conversation about radical feminism being quite literally, beat for beat, incel shit for girls

[girlydemise]

There’s nothing more important in this world than finding people who get you. Not just in a casual way, but in the deep, unspoken way that only another trans person can. The kind of friend who knows what it feels like to stare in the mirror and not recognize yourself, to fight against a body that feels like it’s never fully been yours, to carry the weight of every doubt and every cruel thought that tells you you’ll never be enough.

And on the bad days—the really bad ones—that’s when having someone like that matters the most. Because when I feel like I’m slipping, when the dysphoria sinks its claws into me and whispers that I’ll never get there, that I’ll always be stuck in between, I don’t need someone to give me empty reassurances. I don’t need someone to tell me “it’ll be okay” when they’ve never felt this kind of ache in their bones. I need a friend who knows. Someone who can just be there, who will sit beside me in silence until I’m ready to speak, or hold my hand without making a big deal out of it. Someone who doesn’t try to fix me because they know I’m not broken.

And finding those people? It’s everything. Because before, I thought I was alone. I thought no one else felt the way I did, that maybe I was wrong for even wanting this. But then I met them—the ones who had been through it too, the ones who had the same struggles and the same fears. And suddenly, the weight wasn’t quite as heavy. The road wasn’t quite as lonely.

So if you don’t have that friend yet, I promise you, they’re out there. Someone who will hold space for you when you can’t hold it for yourself. Someone who will remind you, on the worst days, that you do belong. That you are real. That you are enough.

[girlydemise]

Ok actually genuine tip for new tumblr users: if you see a post you like and want to reblog but theres a bad/annoying added on bit in the reblog chain feel free to just reblog that post straight from op or the last person who knew how to mind their business

[girlydemise]

[girlydemise]

@stvksn on ig

[girlydemise]

[girlydemise]

I am worried about the swedes of color, there is so many openly racist laws being passed here in sweden currently

[girlydemise]

[girlydemise]

Something we all need to hear

The problem with the concept of male socialisation is that it is based on a premise that is fundamentally innacurate, i.e. the assumption that your were raised as a Man and therefor your are, in action and thought at least, more or less a Man and in order to stop being a Man you have to remove this fundamentally Masculine thing that was somehow instilled in you

And yes, it is accurate that there is a series of processes in amab childrens lives that attempts to condition them into whatever their culture of masculinity is, but what it doesn't acknowledge is that the fundamental purpose of this is that you are meant to come out of it with an ability to perform whatever social function it is that designates you as a Man in your culture. That's male socialisation. It's the thing that allows you to signal to Proper Men that you are also a Proper Man so you don't face any consequences. However, when you are not a Proper Man, this is more or less impossible.

Male socialisation for transfems (and queer cis men to a lesser extent) is basically just a long series of friends, acquaintances, family members etc trying to shove you through a hole that you don't fit through. And there's only two things you can do, you can either cut bits of yourself off til you squeeze through, or you can just keep getting pushed, painfully and fruitlessly, and hope they give up.

And neither of these approaches actually works. Because of course, they aren't going to give up. Because, remember, a lot of these people pushing you actually like you. They think they're helping you. And in a way, they're not completely wrong, because being anything other than a Real Man is painful and difficult (largely due to these same people, but that's beside the point). So they aren't going to stop pushing you until you get away from them, a process that is difficult and painful and if you ever go back they will just start pushing again

But even if you shave away all the undesirable bits of yourself, and you cut your hair and grow a beard and wear the right clothes, it still doesn't work. Because you still don't fit right. And they know it. Sexuality and gender are two things that people have a very good sense for. And people will see it in everything. The way you walk, the way you speak, the way you hold a glass, the way you stand, the way your wrists move, the movies you like and the books you read and the colour of your shirt and how you style your hair and how you cut your nails and on and on and on. The very best you can hope for, after years and years of meticulous shaving away, is that you work yourself down from being a tranny to being a faggot. And sure, it is better to be a faggot, mostly, but you still aren't a Real Man. And so they'll keep pushing anyway.

Male socialisation is the process by which cis men become Men, but it's also the process by which transfems realise you aren't a Man, and you never will be, and people will always hate you for it. It isn't the process by which you gain some almighty Male Power, it's a process that uses that power against you because you can't wield it right

[girlydemise]

Fuck I am cooked i read duke nukem as dyke nukem

[girlydemise]

When the anti "LGBT propaganda" law passed in Russia, all of you were going insane and cared. Give Georgia the same energy. If you can have sympathy for our oppressors on the basis of them being queer, you should keep the same energy for us, if not more.

If this law passes, every Georgian queer person I know is so severely fucked, myself included. If you make jokes about "being illegal in several countries" you better fucking care about the countries you're apparently illegal in, or going to be illegal in.

Make sure to spread this around. This is important.

[girlydemise]

If you're a trans girl, just remember that you are female and you don't have to call yourself "biologically male" or any of that horseshit to appease cis sensibilities. You are biologically female

[girlydemise]

I can't keep having the same conversations about love languages, mbti, iq, bmi, "brain fully formed at 25" and shit over and over again...