girlcum-sommelier

[girlcum-sommelier]

[girlcum-sommelier]

i'm a dirty rotten girl!!!

[girlcum-sommelier]

for my birthday four months ago i ordered a cute looking eevee plush off of ebay that apparently you could brush and style? i didn't read the description carefully and it was also in japanese. well it arrived!

or, at least, i thought it did...?

[girlcum-sommelier]

Tim Curry with his GameBoy on the set of The Three Musketeers (1993)

[girlcum-sommelier]

we are going to have to bring back “smex”

[girlcum-sommelier]

santa put me on the Nuanced list this year

[girlcum-sommelier]

SS Guard in Canal, 1945 Lee Miller

[girlcum-sommelier]

some excellent business names i found on geoguessr

[girlcum-sommelier]

tumblr guide for new users!!!

[girlcum-sommelier]

business hours only!

[girlcum-sommelier]

What did they mean by this

[girlcum-sommelier]

laser tag places are always like “no running, no laying down, no touching, waah waah we can’t afford the liability insurance.” boring. where do i go for the  underground full-contact laser tag where i can tackle people from on top of the crates.

[girlcum-sommelier]

good suggestion, but i can’t look someone in the eyes as i do that, so it lacks the fear factor i’m looking for

i envision a polite conversation with a stranger at a bus stop. they comment on the weather. i agree that the sky looks nice. they ask if i’m a boy or a girl. i lock eyes with them as i start to retch, bile tumbling from my mouth. the bile soon turns into thick, stinking vomit. they gag and turn away. the bus arrives and i step on, shirt ruined and face permanently burned into a nosy stranger’s memory

anyway i’m looking for donations to fund a research team to make my dream a reality

i wanna learn how to vomit on command so i can get out of work whenever i want

[girlcum-sommelier]

and also spice up boring social interactions

i wanna learn how to vomit on command so i can get out of work whenever i want

[girlcum-sommelier]

i wanna learn how to vomit on command so i can get out of work whenever i want

[girlcum-sommelier]

gaming is under attack and yoiu cannot stop me

[girlcum-sommelier]

I don't know why this keeps happening but I keep meeting toxic heterosexual couples who experiment with polyamory and are heavily into funko pops, board games, Disney princesses and Burlesque stripping and the man is always a withdrawn bearded dude and the woman is always a passive aggressive control freak with an Etsy shop that sells lawn gnomes styled after Dr Who characters and they don't really even seem to like each other but they're always exactly the same. this has happened four times