ghost-rule0 - Tumblr blog

ghost-rule0 · 3 days ago

Text

Break the cycle (Phainon/Kevin x reader)

So this is my first time writting for HSR, I'm not totally caught up on the lore for this world so if there are any mistakes this isn't canon so deal with it. The Hi3rd lore is also tied into this so if you don't understand it, its not that important so like oh well. ANyway if you want a more in depth one shot of one the lives request it in my inbox. or if u have an au for another life let me know lol ANy who im very rusty on my nsfw so dont come for me.

Tags: Slight NSFW, Death, Blood, Death, Hurt no comfort, slight gore??

✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏✲✲꘏ ꘏ ꘏ ꘏

Every Chryso’s heir has a flaw; everyone knew that. Whether it be losing you’re humanity, being lethal to others, or being unkillable. There was always something that you had to give up. (Y/n)’s felt like it was her sanity, but in reality, she was cursed to always relive her past lives in some way or another. She swore she wouldn’t let it happen again. Or at least that’s what she told herself. Once she entered the Holy City, it felt like her life was shifting. The familiar feeling of his presence was around. “Oh, that’s Phainon over there! Hey! Snowy!!” The man turned and waved, his eyes meeting with (Y/n)’s. She felt her heart stop the moment she made eye contact with him. The bright blue gaze that she had seen many times before was accompanied by the just as bright white hair. The way it complemented his stunning eyes. “Kevin?” She whispered, standing there with Tribbe.

It couldn’t be. This can’t be happening again.

The man approached the two of them, smiling all the while. That charming smile that she missed so badly. Yet she could’ve gone her entire life without seeing again, knowing the fate that was now bound to happen. “I’m Phainon, and you are?” He sounded exactly the same. How? How is this man Kevin, but also not? Was the universe being so cruel to her this time?

She refused to let this happen again. She would stop the cycle from going on. (Y/n) Decided then and there that she would avoid this man and make him hate her. “None of your concern.” Her expression changed from confused to disgusted. She saw him retract the hand he was holding to her. The female watched as his brows furrowed, and he seemed utterly lost. She just walked past him, Tribbe following after the female hurriedly.

Phainon just stood there, very unsure of what had happened. “Do you know her perhaps?” Algaea asked as she approached the man, watching the two interact just mere seconds ago. “I don’t think so?” He turned to see her walking along with the young girl. Smiling at her words, but as soon as her gaze met his again, she glared. She glared.

“It appears she must not like you.”

“Well, you don’t say.”

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

Everywhere she looked, she saw him. Kevin-Or damn it was Phainon here. He was always where she wanted to be, and when he spotted her, it was like a puppy running up to their owner.

“(Y/n)! How are you today? The weather is lovely, isn’t it?”

“(Y/n), do you have any plans today?”

“Would you like me to show you around?”

“Have dinner with me, perhaps?”

“Tell me about yourself?”

Every. Single. Time.

She was about to be fed up with it. Why did the man want to befriend her so badly? (Y/n) was becoming irritated with him in this life. He was always so persistent in the other ones, too. So she shouldn’t be shocked he was here as well. So when she was in the market today and he approached her, there wasn’t much she could do this time. “(Y/n)! How are you liking it here so far? It’s pretty great, right?”

“It’s nice,” She rolled her eyes, walking away from him, but the man was too stubborn, and she heard his boots clicking against the stone pavement as she walked. “Have you had the chance to enjoy the warm baths yet?” She didn’t respond. The female didn’t want to go on talking with him; she just wanted to enjoy her day and then go to sleep later, but he just wouldn’t stop talking. (Y/n) did love his voice, though; it was one thing about him that made her fall hard. He could talk for hours on end, and she would just listen. Yet the fate that was ahead caused her to snap out of her daydreaming. “I had a question for you!”

“What is it now?” She groaned and stopped, turning to look towards him. Basket in her hands. It had a few things in it: some fruit, wine, and fabric.

“I heard you tell Castorice that she could call you (N/n) as a nickname! Mind if I use it?” Hearing that name come out of his mouth gave her flashbacks. So many. All at once. The way he would laugh it, kiss her so sweetly right before saying it, the feeling made her sick. After all, it was him who started calling her that.

“Don’t ever call me that.” Her brows furrowed, and her (e/c) eyes glared into his disgustly beautiful blue ones. She turned on her heel and quickly stormed away, trying so hard to fight the tears that begged to spill out.

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

The first time she met Kevin, they were both attending school, and the only reason he even talked to her in the first place was because of Mei. He had his sights set on her best friend, but after Mei told him she wasn’t interested, he kept talking to (N/n). Asking for advice as to how he could gain Mei’s affection, but over time, he fell for (Y/n) instead.

And he fell hard, too.

It was the small things about her that made him swoon. How she cared so much for her friends, and she knew so much about the most important people in her life. After that, it was her smile, and how infectious it was to others. If she smiled, then everyone around her would as well. Her laugh felt like a siren's song to him. She had the most gorgeous laugh he had ever heard. It was–He couldn’t even say everything he liked about her, he loved about her.

It truly didn’t take her long to feel the same way, but both of them were too scared to ruin what they already had. So close, yet so far from what they really wanted. Even so, the two spent every free second they had together. (Y/n) always finding him first. Asking him what he was doing after school, or what he was doing later that weekend. It was usually so she could drag him into some sort of hangout she planned. To their friend group, they were already dating. Mei saying it was only a matter of time before the two became official.

“You like her, don’t you?” Su asked the simple question, but it held so much meaning behind it. “What?” Kevin glanced at his friend. “The way you two are together, it's clear you both have feelings for one another. You should ask her out.”

“I don’t think she likes me like that, Su, I mean (Y/n) is so-” He was at a loss for words. He couldn’t even describe her. Su gave Kevin a look. “You should do it. Today.”

But that same day, as school was ending, the third Honkai eruption had begun. He tried his best to get to the girl before anything could happen. He would drag her away. Both he and Mei were searching for her, but it was too late. He watched as (Y/n) was killed by a Honkai beast, Mei, trying to drag him away. The creature tearing her apart as she was defenseless. Their eyes met for the very last time. “(N/n)!!”

“Kev-” She didn’t finish her words before Mei dragged him inside.

That was the first time she meant Kevin.

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

“Coreflame?”

“Yes, if we kill this Titan, Phainon would be the one to obtain this Coreflame.”

“A Demigod,” (Y/n) spoke, staring at the stars surrounding them, the sigils in the sky. “We’re a long way from that, though. We still don’t even know where they are hiding out,” She nodded her head at Aglaea’s words. Would his fighting the titan get one of them killed in this life? Something inside of her told her yes, it would be. Yet even as she tried to show the man how much she disliked him, he didn’t care.

He was persistent. As she had already figured out.

As she was leaving with Aglaea, he just happened to be at the exit, smiling. “Phainon,” the blonde greeted and walked away, giving the two of them some space. (Y/n) wanted to follow, but she felt a hand on her arm.

“Let go of me.” She wasn’t asking, she was telling him.

“I want to talk, come on. " She stared blankly at him, trying her best to seem menacing so he would leave her alone. It clearly wasn’t working as he held his sheepish smile, and kept his gaze focused on her. The female sighed loudly and caved.

“Fine,” Phainon did a small cheer, and he released his hold on her. The man cleared his throat and confidently flashed her another smile before asking his question. “Did I do something to offend you, (Y/n)?” She frowned as her name left his mouth. It did something to her, pulling at the strings in her heart. She missed him saying her name.

“No,”

“I must have done something to you then. You seem to avoid me like the black tide, and I can’t understand why. If I can fix it, please inform me how to.” She looked at him with a strange emotion of pain in her eyes. Like she wanted to tell him something, but she couldn’t. He almost saw the tears that begged to escape her lower lashes, but she wiped her face before speaking.

“I wish you could fix it, but—” She paused. “You can’t. It’s something with me, not you. Just please stay away from me.” The girl pushed past the man, quickly running away. She couldn’t face him, and cry, because then he would console her. Because Phainon was like that. He was kind and would do something like that for people, even if she was an ass to him; and surely if he did that to her the girl would cave even more.

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

The second time she meant him was when she joined MOTH. She was recruited by Elysia, and how could she say no to her? That woman was convincing. So the first time she stepped foot into the place, her eyes met with Kevin's, and his with hers. Something between them clicked like always. He was entranced by her, and she by him. Elysia thought they would get along very well, especially with the fire she could sense between them, but…

They fought. All the time.

At least in front of everyone else. Bickering back and forth, both of them stressed over the constant war hanging over their heads. Arguing over what to do next because the girl was stubborn and hated to be bossed around. Especially when it was Kevin telling her what to do.

But behind closed doors, it was a different story. They didn’t fight. The two of them got along just fine. Maybe that’s because for a minute it didn’t seem like the world was in their hands. They could just be dumb young adults. Two people who were trying to figure themselves out. Falling asleep in each other's beds, cuddling up to one another. It was sweet, and nobody really knew that they were like this.

It gave the girl some hope that maybe this would all come to an end, and they could live out their lives together somewhere in the world. She truly felt that she could fall in love with him. Yet she was terrified that if they did more than just talk and cuddle, it would affect their mission.

He changed that one night.

“(Y/n),” She was lying her head on his chest, almost about to fall asleep. It had been a long, grueling day; she almost lost him on the battlefield to the 6th Herrscher, but everyone turned out fine. Even if they fought horribly with each other after that. “What, Kev?” The female opened her eyes a little and lazily looked up at him. His bright blue eyes sent a chill down her spine.

He stared at her for a long time. “Kevin, what?” She laughed a little, a nervous tone underneath it. He leaned down a bit and pressed a kiss against her lips. He couldn’t help it. He wanted her, he needed her, he loved her. After today, a world without her would be too cruel for him to bare.

She was truly not expecting that to happen. A lecture from him? Maybe but. Of course, the female kissed back, their bodies fumbling a little as she moved herself on top of him, their lips never parting once.

She could go on like this, as long as she had him.

And it was like that for a while, but then the seventh Herrscher attacked, and they couldn’t fight her off as humans. They were no match for a god of her strength. It took a lot out of everyone and toll their relationship. Kevin was beyond his normal stressed-out self. He was angry and snappy, and she felt herself losing the person she loved.

It got even worse when Mobius and Mei proposed using the MANTIS experiment. And then Kevin offered to be the first subject.

“There is no way in hell that you are going to do that!”

“Someone needs to be the test subject and I–”

“You have no idea what could happen! You have no clue what that could do to you!” (Y/n) turned to glare at her lover, her face full of worry and concern for Kevin. Even though she bickered with him all the time and wanted nothing more than to slap some sense into him right now, she loved him. He kept her going. (Y/n) couldn’t bare the thought of a world without him. She wouldn’t make it.

“We need to defeat the 7th Herrscher, and if we don’t, we will all die.”

“You defeated the 6th one just fine if we try harder-”

“(Y/n) we can’t. We’ve tried. You don’t get a say in what I do.”

“Kevin, we may not agree on everything, but this—” She didn’t realize how close she had gotten to the man or how the two of them were yelling at each other. “I love you. Please, don’t do this.”

He sighed and closed his eyes, hiding the icy blue spheres that held his feelings. “We don’t have a choice (N/n).”

Even after she begged him not to, he went through with it. Although he came out fine and defeated the 7th Herrscher, there was one more problem. He couldn’t be near any humans. If he even tried to get near her, it would hurt her, and she wouldn’t be able to withstand it. Kevin was so cold, not just emotionally but physically. She begged Mobius to use the MANTIS experiment on her, but Elysia and Kevin both told her she wasn’t allowed to. It made her angry, if she wasn’t human, then she could be near him again and–But the man said he didn’t want that fate for her. He didn’t know what it would do to her.

Though they kept fighting the honkai, Kevin became one of their strongest fighters. He was a soldier. He defeated Herrscher after Herrscher with no problem until the 12th came into play. It was nearly impossible to predict the damage that would come from her.

(Y/n), being the way she was thought that she could stop the damn thing from hurting someone else. She shoved one of her comrades out of the way and took the blow that sealed her fate. Kevin scurried over to her, not caring about the surrounding Honkai. They didn’t have much time, he needed to stun the god and get everyone else to the cryo pods and–He didn’t care about that right now as (Y/n) lay in his arms, bleeding, smiling at him. “Hey, look at that, you finally got to touch me again!”

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

“What are the three of you up to now?” (Y/n) had her hands on her hips as she watched the triplets hide something behind their backs. “Nothing…nothing at all.”

She eyed them a bit longer, hoping to scare the answer out of them, but luckily, Mydei came to their defense. “I’m having the girls do me a favor.” She smiled at the large man, and then the girls took that as their chance to run off. “We have to hurry up! Trianne, come on!” Tribios grabbed the girl, and they quickly scurried down the steps.

“So what secret task are you having them do?” While avoiding Phainon, Mydei and (Y/n) had become pretty good friends. It truly wasn’t her intention to befriend someone else, but the man had approached her, wanting to become friends. Odd sure. But who was she to say no to him? He was a prince after all. “Don’t worry about it,” He crossed his arms and looked at the female up and down. “Where are you heading?” She was dressed in something different from her usual attire. Something he took notice of very quickly.

“The baths.” He nodded his head. “Want me to come along?” She put her hand on her chest and dramatically gasped.

“The crowned Prince Mydei wants to spend time with little old me?”

“Maybe not if you keep acting like that,” She laughed a little, covering her smile.

“Fine, fine, yeah, I don’t mind if you tag along.” Phanion was there, around the corner, listening. He didn’t mean to, but he was avoiding her like she was him. If the girl didn’t want him around that much, then fine, he would stay out of her way. Of course, that didn’t mean he wasn’t concerned about her. She was hiding something, and he didn’t know what. From the moment she entered the city, she was a pure mystery to him.

It bugged him so much, and all because something about her drew him in. The way she laughed so carelessly with her friends or her smile. It was so infectious. It was all so; he couldn’t place it. Phainon wanted to be friends with her, so he sent Mydei in to see if she would confess why she hated him so much. Yet the man was straying from the task and befriended her instead, and he thought the girl was falling for the prince. It didn’t bother him, or at least that's what he kept telling himself.

So what if the Chyrso Heir didn’t like him? He would just figure out why and move on. Right?

Wrong, he was so very wrong as he watched the girl walk off with Mydei, laughing happily as she elbowed him a little.

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

The third time she ran into Kevin, they were on opposing teams. She had worked with him for some time, and then she saw how mad he was getting. Maybe from the grief of Mei dying all those years ago, but eventually she left his cause, and she found herself at St. Freya's with Kiana, going through a wild journey with her. They became like sisters. (Y/n) felt like she was the older sister constantly doting on her, and making sure she was listening to Himeko. Even after everything the girl went through, she still stood by her side, ready to help her fight.

Even if she found herself on the opposite side of the battlefield, trying to stop Kevin from going through with Project Stigma. It was no use, though; he was already too far gone. Worse than she remembered.

She aided Kiana in the battle. Fighting just as hard, watching her friend succeed in her goal to stop him. Of course, fate was so cruel to her, like always– she didn’t make it to the end, and both she and Kevin died in the fight. (Y/n) wished it were different. The girl knew he thought differently from her; he always did since the first time they met at MOTH. The last thing she saw before closing her eyes in that life was Kiana shaking her, begging her to wake up. “I’m going to see Himeko now, okay, Kiana?” Her eyes glanced over to Kevin’s corpse, smiling a little. She would see him too.

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

“Mydei!” (Y/n) laughed as the man splashed some water at her. He wasn’t usually this playful, but today, he seemed to be in a good mood. The two of them were getting closer every day; she really thought this time it would be different. She was going to break the cycle. Even if every time Phainon looked at her, she felt her heart twinge. “Stop!” The girl laughed once more, trying to block her face from getting water on it.

“Mind if I join?” That familiar voice made her smile fade, and she turned to see the snowy white hair. “I don’t care,” Mydei replied, the small smile he had disappearing as well.

“It’s rare to see you act so childish, Mydei.” He just rolled his eyes and muttered ‘HKS’ at Phanion. It was true, though, the man never acted too childish around anyone, well, not that she knew of. (Y/n) sat back down and gently tapped the warm water with her fingers, trying to avoid the stare that was settling on her.

“So (Y/n), we haven’t spoken in a while. How are you adjusting in the Holy City? Are you finally used to the moon not being here?”

“I suppose.” She kept her gaze on the water. “More time for practicing combat, isn’t that right, (N/n)?” Mydei said.

“I don’t need to practice like you.” She teased.

“What weapon do you use?” Phainon’s voice cut through their playful banter that was just starting.

“A sword, nothing fancy.” She turned her attention from Mydei to Phainon. She supposed talking to him wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. If she was going to stay here for a long time, she might as well become somewhat civil with the other Chryso Heir. Plus, the girl was already very fond of the blonde next to her, so if she were to become friends with Phainon, it wouldn’t be so bad, right?

“Maybe we should spare some time, I would love to have another friendly competition with someone other than Mydei.”

“Sure,” the smile that grew on his face made her smile right back at him. She loved seeing that smile, but she hated to admit it. It made her feel some sort of comfort she couldn’t place. Maybe knowing he was alive made her heart throb.

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

The fourth time their paths crossed might have been her favourite. “Hi, welcome to Mantis cafe. What can I get you?” Her voice was monotone and laced with boredom until she looked up. The cutest boy she had ever seen was right in front of her, and oh my god–His eyes were such a gorgeous blue, and the white hair that was in his eyes made them pop even more. She felt her face get red, and she quickly looked back down at the POS screen. “I’m not sure, can you suggest something that has a lot of caffeine? I have a test I’m cramming for, and sorry I’m talking way too much.”

“Oh, uhm, you’re fine. Yeah, I’ll just put in a blonde roast for you; it's pretty strong.” She smiled at him, and he gave her the same one in return.

After that, he came into the coffee shop every day, and they had become pretty good friends, and somehow he just happened to know when she was on her break. It totally wasn’t Elysia who told him. So they got to chatting, and he was so smart. Otherworldly smart. He knew so much about science and physics. He was majoring in some sort of science thing she couldn’t understand, but she loved it when he went on and on about it. His voice made her all giddy.

Then one day, “Can I ask you something?” She was on her break, and they were sitting outside the cafe. The weather was lovely for once, and she needed some sun after being cooped up in the stuffy coffee shop all day long. Yeah, what’s up?” She glanced up from her phone.

“Do you wanna go out with me?”

“Huh?!” Her face turned a bright shade of red, and her eyes widened. Him. Kevin. Wanted to go out with her? She thought it was a joke for a second, like for real? Her? She was a mess all of the time and smelled like coffee. The girl always had stains on her clothes. She could never do her makeup right, and her hair looked like she had never brushed it. Although in her defense, it just got like that throughout the day. A lot of time must have passed because when he spoke again, he looked defeated.

“It’s okay to say no,” He scratched the back of his head awkwardly. “No! I mean, yes! Yeah, I want to go out with you, I just-”

“Good! I really don’t like coffee, so I was getting worried I was coming for nothing.” She laughed really hard at that. The fact that only reason he would come to this overpriced cafe was to see her every day. It did make the female feel special. Only a little.

Within the next few months, they had become official. They went out on dates and spent time together when they could. She was always working mornings, and he was in school most days, but when they had time, they were at each other's houses.

“You know, it would be easier to see you more if you just moved in.”

She whipped her head around to look at him. “Kevin!”

“What?” He laughed. “We’ve only been together three months!”

“And?”

“And I see you every single day!”

“Yea,h but think about waking up next to me after a very long night of–”

“Kevin!!”

That’s how she was moving in weeks later. Elysia and Mei were teasing her relentlessly about it. Things were good. They were really good. They were going steady for over a year and were finally celebrating their anniversary. Kevin had planned this whole big date for the two of them. A fancy dinner, a night under the stars, a moonlit walk. Super cheesy stuff, and she was living for it. But… “It’s storming pretty bad, should we cancel?” (Y/n) looked out the window, her eyes worried at the road’s condition. “It’s just some rain, (N/n), it’ll be fine.” He didn’t sound too concerned, so she trusted his judgement

The man had never been wrong before, so he was right, and it would be fine but…

It wasn’t fine. It was far from it. Somehow, when they were driving, someone crashed into them, causing two other cars to crash as well. It all happened so quickly, and she didn’t realize what was going on until she looked over and saw her lover covered in blood. As much as she tried to get to him, she couldn’t. Her vision was fading in and out, blood dripping into her eyesight, not helping her already fading sight. “Kevin-” He wasn’t breathing, and soon she wouldn’t be either.

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

She was laughing. With Phainon. Happily. It didn’t even connect in her brain that they were friends now. So much had happened recently. Some travelers from beyond came, and they were helping them in so many ways, and now they could find Nikador and defeat him. Phainon was so close to getting what he wanted, and she was so happy for him, overjoyed in fact. “That’s such a dumb joke, Phai,” She nudged him a little, and rested her back against the wall. They were relaxing outside after spending some time in the shops earlier.

It had been so crazy lately, so she was happy just to get a second to breathe. After a few weeks ago in the baths, she wanted to give him a chance to be friends. He weasled his way back into her heart, and she couldn’t not be friends with him. Instantly, once they got along, it was magnetic.

They clicked. She knew they would, they always did. “You love my humor,” He said.

“Maybe, or maybe I just laugh so your ego won’t hurt,”

“Ouch, that one stung.” (Y/n) just shook her head, smiling. They were quiet for a long while. The comforting silence between them.

After some time had passed, she finally spoke. “Are you ready to finally get the Core Flame?” Her voice was less playful, and she looked at the never-changing sky. “I suppose,”

“Haven’t you been waiting you’re whole life for this?”

“Maybe, but I think Mydei should have it, or even you.” She glanced up at him. “You deserve this. Nikador is your battle to fight. Of course, we’ll help, but you should deliver the final blow.”

“I-” He paused. “You think so, (N/n)?” The female reached down and grabbed his hand and gave it a light squeeze. “Absolutely, Phai.” He turned to stare at her, his soft expression making her melt. She loved him. In every life, she couldn’t help but love him. It was consuming in a way that nothing else felt. If this were all they could be in life, she would be okay with that. As long as they both lived. She could go on this way.

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

The fifth time they meant was pure accident in her opinion. She was out with Elysia and Mei at a club when a guy accidentally spilled his drink on her. “Hey! Watch out!” As she was very angrily trying to wipe away the red drink that was all over her new dress, she looked up and saw the very handsome man who spilled said drink on her. Then suddenly all was forgiven, and they were chatting the entire night away. He was interesting, that was for sure. He was some guy who worked for the MOTH science lab downtown.

Honestly, the girl had no clue what he was talking about. She was drunk by this point and needed to get home. The whole night was a blur, and somehow, she had gotten home with Kevin wrapped around her. All she can recall is that the snowy-haired man was in her bed, and their clothes were tossed everywhere in her room.

From there, a one-night stand turned into three years of a situation-ship. Never confirming if they were together, but not correcting anyone if the person said the two of them were dating. She truly liked him, but (Y/n) was too scared to ask. She really just went along with whatever he wanted. Kevin was boyfriend-ish with her. Cuddling her when the two of them were alone, or buying her gifts randomly. Especially when there was an occasion to buy said gift on. Christmas was always a fun time for her.

“You should just move in together at this point (N/n),” Elysia said as she was going through the women's closets. Kevin asked her to come over, and he said, ‘Wear something cute.’ So she called Ellie over here to help her. “I don’t think he sees me that way, Elys.”

“I don’t know the way he talks about you; it's like he is gushing over a girlfriend,” The pinkette giggled and turned her attention back, digging through her friend's closet.

Then, later that same day, she made her way over to Kevin’s house. To be fair, this life’s death was a crazy accident as well. The building he was staying in caught on fire, and the man died, not being able to escape, but he made sure she got out just fine. He would be damned if the girl he loved didn’t get out of this stupid place alive. It was his fault she was here after all. So as he shoved her out of the building, he very sweetly mumbled something to her.

“I love you (N/n),”

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

(Y/n) made ripples in the water as she stared at her own reflection. Phainon had been spending more and more time with her. It was pushing the line of friends. The number of times she found herself wanting more than just long hugs and late ‘night’ talks. The girl could also tell he wanted more too, the way he was hesitant to leave her room, or how he would stare at her after the long hug they would share. She was devastated and couldn’t bring herself to give in. As much as she wanted, it wouldn’t be good.

Suddenly, the water rippled more than she was expecting from her movements, and the water sloshed. She looked up and saw Phainon getting in with her. “Hey (N/n),” he smiled, and god, he smiled that sweet, enchanting smile of his.

“Hi Phai,” she greeted him back, and her eyes went to the water again. “You’re avoiding me again,” he laughed, but she could tell that he was worried. Of course, he was. They were making progress, and she felt like she knew him her entire life—because, in a way, she had.

“I am not,”

“Come on, tell me what's wrong.” She closed her eyes and sighed. If only it were that easy to explain to him. If (Y/n) could tell him all about the cruel past that she had to relive every time she closed her eyes. “I’m just-” She paused and looked up at him, her facial expression somber. “I’m worried about the battle with Nikador, I mean, how do we even stop him, ya know?”

“Now are you doubting my fighting abilities (Y/n)?” He laughed a little, but seeing that joke didn’t change her sour expression, he sighed. He removed his arm from her shoulder and grabbed the hand that was playing in the water. “What is really bugging you?”

“If I say what I want to, it’ll change everything,” She sighed and thumbed over the top of his hand. Her eyes focused on their intertwined fingers that were in the water. She felt him tense a little as the words left her mouth. Fuck. She was being cryptic and he–

“What if it doesn’t?”

(Y/n) lifted her head up to meet his gaze, his stare so intense and full of something, hope maybe. “I doubt that, Phainon.”

“I don’t think it will because, (N/n), I like you.” Her heart tightened in her chest. No, not again, please. “There's this thing about you I can’t place. I’m drawn to you and I have no idea why, well I do but–” He laughed and paused for a minute. “You’re the most caring person I know, I see how you take care of you��re friends and how much you worry for them. You are extremely witty and funny, and then you have this smile. It’s infectious to others. If you smile, then everyone around you will as well. Plus, on top of that, you have this laugh, and every time I get to hear it, I feel so lucky.” He paused, now both of his hands held hers, and he didn’t move his gaze from the girl.

If anything, it grew more intense, and she couldn’t look away. How could she when he was staring at her like that? Again. “There's so much more about you, I want to be more than this.” It’s happening. If he were to be with her, she would surely get him killed again. She couldn’t do it anymore. If she had to live through one more life where one of them would die. Her heart hurt so bad, more than it ever has. At least before, she wasn’t aware of the pain from her past lives. She could be blissfully happy and fall in love with him. Over and over again. But here? She knew the fate that awaited them.

“(Y/n),” She felt the tears welling up in her eyes as he spoke her name. Fuck. What was she to do when he looked at her like that? His eyes boring into her soul. “I want more than this too,” She nearly whispered the words. The female meant it in a different way than him but–(Y/n) couldn’t help herself. Maybe this time it wouldn’t happen. Because she knew. Right?

He leaned down to her level. She was so lost in her own mind that she didn’t even see him get so close. Now, his face was mere inches away from hers. “Don’t avoid me anymore, please, " he whispered. The sentence sent chills down her spine—chills she was familiar with. The way he leaned in and pressed his lips against hers just felt so right—like they were made for one another.

The female didn’t pull away; she stayed put, pressing her lips against his even harder. The familiar feeling brought her emotions that she couldn’t understand. All she wanted was him, all she needed was him. “Phai,”

“(N/n),” She paused.

The water splashed around as she was pulled into his lap on top of him. “We’re in a public bath house, you know this, right?” The female laughed a little as she rested her forehead against his.

“You’re right, we should go back to my room.”

“Phainon!”

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

Again.

And again

And again.

The dreams never let her sleep long. Each time it hurt more and more. Screaming out for Kevin, begging for him to save her, or calling to him as he lay there bleeding. The nightmares haunted her, reminding the girl of the fate she was bound to in each life. This time it wasn’t Kevin she was calling for, she was screaming for Phainon.

Watching as Mei dragged him away from the outside hall that (Y/n) was currently being attacked in. He was trying his best to resist, but the girl wanted to get him out of there. She was pleading for him to come back. The words echoed in the hallway as the door slammed shut. “Phainon! Please!” Only for her eyes to meet with the Honkai beast hovering over her.

“(Y/n),”

“(N/n)!”

She sat up, her chest heaving up and down, her eyes watering as she stared at the large room she was in. The daylight was pouring through all the windows so brightly. She searched around the room and saw next to her Phainon sitting up in bed, staring at her very concernedly. “Phai,” she panted and buried her head in her hands, fingers grabbing at the hair that spilled forward.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, it was just a dream.” She shook her head, trying to tell herself that it wouldn’t happen again. That was the past, she was aware now. She would avoid the death sentence.

“You were screaming in your sleep.” He pulled the female close to his side, as she buried her head in his chest. She was shaking, her heart beating so rapidly he could feel it. The male placed a kiss on top of her head. He wasn’t sure what she encountered in the black tide, but whatever it was must be worse than him. Little did he know it wasn’t the black tide that scared her. It was losing him that did. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

“No, gods no.” Her voice was muffled as she hid her face from him, trying to collect herself.

“It may make you feel better,”

“It won’t trust me, I just wanna go back to sleep.”

She didn’t get any more sleep.

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

“Please let me come with you tomorrow.”

(Y/n) was begging Phainon to let her come along to the battle of Nikador, but he was refusing. “It’ll be fine, Mydei, and I will be just fine, my love.” For some reason, she didn’t think that would be the case.

“I’m extremely useful, you know this better than anyone else.”

“No, (N/n).”

The girl let out a groan and dramatically fell onto the bed, rolling herself in the blankets. She could hear his amused chuckle from behind. She was always one for the dramatics. He found it endearing, but then again, she was stubborn. Double-edged sword, he supposed.

“Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?”

“Well, I guess a kiss would make me feel better,” she sat up on the bed and smiling sweetly at her boyfriend. “Really? That’s all?” The female shrugged and kept her rotten smile.

“Fine, if that’s all.” He walked towards the girl. Phainon leaned down, his hair getting in his eyes a bit as he moved to place a kiss against the female's lips. The moment he was within arm's reach, she grabbed his shirt and pulled him down on top of her, laughing the whole time. “Ah- (Y/n)!” He couldn’t help but laugh with her as he caught himself in time so he wouldn’t crush her. His arms rested on either side of her head as he hovered above her slightly.

“Was this your plan all along?” She nodded her head. “Perhaps, but there's more to it.” Phainon raised a brow and leaned down to give her another kiss as her arms wrapped around his neck. It started out sweet, and really his intentions weren’t more than a simple kiss, but the minute the girl playfully nipped at his lips, he couldn’t help himself.

A switch flipped in him. The careful, loving kisses turned into rough, messy makeout. Neither of them barely got a chance to breathe between each and every desperate kiss, the feeling making (Y/n) feel lightheaded, a dizziness swept over her, and yet she couldn’t get enough of him. The way his lips tasted against her, how he would quickly bite her lower lip enough for her to open her mouth. Just so he could slip his tongue in. She just wanted more. So much more.

“Phai,”

“What am I going to fast?” He chuckled.

“Not fast enough,”

The words made him remove his lips and then replace them right on her neck. She felt herself jolt at the instant feeling of his teeth biting down. She heard him laugh once again and went on with what he was doing. Her hands went to his hair, tugging him along to the most sensitive spot on her neck.

“Inpatient, are we?”

“Shut up and-” As she was talking, the man had pulled her dress down enough to expose her chest, and he wasted no time moving down to lick the exposed nipple. She stopped talking once she felt his warm tongue swipe against the sensitive bud.

Just as they were getting into it–

A knock on the door stopped both of them.

“Phainon, Aglaea said it’s time.” Castorice was at the door, her soft voice speaking to the man on top of (Y/n). The girl's wide eyes stared up at her boyfriend. He just smiled and placed a kiss against her lips. “Coming, coming,”

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

Unfortunately, Aglaea suggested that (Y/n) go along with the group to defeat Nikador. Understandably, Phainon wasn’t very happy about this but she was. This way, she could keep an eye on her lover and make sure nothing would happen to him. She would do everything in her power to stop history from repeating itself. But the unexpected problem came in when they couldn’t defeat the god. The group had to split.

This worried her, and it scared her to her very core. Yet Phainon suggested that the girl go along with Stelle and Castorice. “I am not-”

“Go! I’m not asking you (Y/n), I’m telling you!”

“Come on,” Stelle grabbed the female and pulled her away from the fight. They didn’t have much time already. “No, it's going to happen agai,n I can’t-”

“(Y/n) now!”

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

The girl was thrown back into battle, and hearing his voice gave her a moment of relief. “You hear that? They’ve returned!” It only took seconds for the girl to snap into fighting mode. Things were going well, and she was sure—so sure it would be different. It had to be. It wasn’t Kevin, it was Phainon. So that must mean that fate wanted to spare her this time, right?

She wanted to be right so badly.

So much so that she made an error. She was so close. It would have been different this time if she hadn’t been so focused on making it that way. Nikador went to strike at the same time as she did; his attention, for some reason, was focused on her instead of the others. The gods must hate her.

The blade struck her straight through her stomach, and this must be some sort of joke, right? The world wouldn’t let her fall in love with him all over again just to take it away. Right?

“So close,” She mumbled.

After that, everything seemed to be one big blur. One minute, Nikador was there, and then he wasn’t. There was a floating Coreflame, and her lover was rushing over to her side.

“(Y/n), no!” He pulled her into his arms, holding her tightly against his chest. “It happened again,” She mumbled.

“What happened again? (N/n)?”

“I thought this time for sure it would end differently.” The metallic taste of blood was flooding her mouth. “Wanna know my flaw?” She weakly looked up at the man who held her heart for years.

“I remember every past I’ve ever lived, doomed to repeat it.” She blinked a little, her vision going in and out. A familiar feeling. “I just thought for once maybe it would be different, one of us wouldn’t die.”

“No, this isn’t right, you’ll be fine-”

“Get the coreflame, you deserve it.”

He shook his head, eyes starting to water. “I’ll see you again, okay? Just might take a while.” Her hand reached for his face, but she didn’t make it. She didn’t get to hold him one last time. She died in his arms. Just like before. Doomed to repeat the cycle.

ஜ۩۞۩ஜஜ۩۞۩ஜ

(Y/n) yawned as she woke up, rubbing her eyes lazily. She swore she had a weird dream again, but she couldn’t really remember what it was about. She just knew it had something to do with some sort of Greek mythology. She always had weird dreams she could never recall. The female glanced at the time on her phone.

7 A.M

Weird time for her to wake up, she usually slept til ten, but she was up now. Phainon was probably up as well. He was always up before her. She threw the blankets off of her and slumped her way into the small kitchen of their shared apartment. “Phai, did you make coffee?”

“For you? Of course.” He wrapped an arm around the female once she was near him and pulled her in for a kiss. “How did you sleep?”

She shrugged. “Fine, I guess, but have you seen the weather alerts? The snow is really bad today. Maybe we should meet up with Algaea and Anaxa some other time.”

“It’s your birthday, we are not canceling.”

“Fine, fine, give me the creamer.”

107 notes · View notes