getoutofyourownwaybydevikay

[getoutofyourownwaybydevikay]

So tomorrow is day ONE.

I’m tired. Extremely tired. You know why? I’m thinking about getting up at 6am, running, and then working a full 8 hour shift. No bueno. So I’m going to weigh myself in the mornings after I run, I’ve decided. And I’m prepping my water bottle for tomorrow. I hate, and I mean hate, just plain ice water. So I cut up a lemon and put it in the bottom to soak in the fridge over night. I’m scared I’m going to let myself down tomorrow morning. I really need and want to do this for myself.

[getoutofyourownwaybydevikay]

My sleepless nights

Motivated me that's ready to get this workout goin': Hey, it's totally 12:30 in the morning, you have to get up at 6 am the next month so you can run and what not. Let's go to bed. NOW. C'mon! Go. You can do it.

Actual me: Haha yeah. But there's Dr. Pepper. And granola bars. And yet ANOTHER reeeeeally good Criminal Minds marathon. Oh man. And plus if I lay down, I can't sleep. I toss. I turn. So why should I?

Motivated me that's ready to get this workout goin': BECAUSE YOU NEED TO.

Actual me: BUT I CAN'T. I PHYSICALLY CAN.NOT. My brain would rather ponder EVERYTHING in the UNIVERSE.

Is it just me?

[getoutofyourownwaybydevikay]

ALSO, these are a beautiful thing called Oatmeal Banana Flax Muffins. 

I know, flax never sounds appetizing (and sometimes makes you goooo...) but still. I've overcome the whole flax thing. It can be pretty good!  So here's the recipe for this, since I'm definitely going to have to try it!

¾ c. whole wheat flour

½ c. old fashioned oats

¼ c. firmly packed brown sugar

2 tbsp. ground flax seeds

1 tsp. cinnamon

½ tsp. baking soda

1 tsp. baking powder

¼ tsp. salt

1 egg white

2 ½ tbsp. canola oil

¼ tsp. vanilla extract

1 small banana, mashed

½ c. milk

Directions:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees and line muffin pan with six paper muffin cups

Combine whole wheat flour, oats, brown sugar, flax seeds, cinnamon, baking soda, baking powder and salt

In a separate bowl, mix together egg white, oil, vanilla, banana and milk

Gradually mix flour mixture into egg mixture until batter is combined

Divide the batter into the six muffin cups

Bake for 15 – 18 minutes

[getoutofyourownwaybydevikay]

Okay, so I found this cool recipe for this Key Lime Smoothie.. and it sounds fantastic. Of course, I'll have to go buy the ingredients and what not, but hey! Healthy eating may not be too bad after all!

1/2 c. milk

1 container Oikos key lime Greek yogurt

1.5 bananas

1.5 Tbsp. lime juice

Sounds good, doesn't it?! Who knew?

[getoutofyourownwaybydevikay]

I'm not sure about everything food related here.

So, should I diet with this?

Should I do the whole calorie counting thing? 

I love food. Like, a lot. Yeah, I'm one of those people whose twitter is obsessively filled with pizza, donuts, and every other kind of food people post on there. I love to eat. It makes me happy. It makes everyone happy, doesn't it? All that releasing of endorphins or what-cha-ma-call-its? 

But I know that the way I eat right now it's exactly great, or healthy, or anything good. So I do need to do at least something different. 

But I really don't wanna do all this calorie counting and what not. Why should I diet if I don't have to? Ugh. That word feels gross in my mouth, or my brain, I guess, since I'm typing all of this.

In the end, I'm just gonna say.. myeh.. I don't wannaaaa.

But cutting Dr. Pepper out of my daily intake should definitely do something for some weight loss, believe me. I consume at least a 12-pack a week, I'm not even kidding. Sometimes it's more. I know it is. I'm buying the stuff it seems like every other day occasionally. 

But I've been doing a lot of research. And reading. And article searching. And I think I've figured out how my diet should look, so my next post will contain my game plan for all of that!

[getoutofyourownwaybydevikay]

My Running Plan

Alright, so here's how I plan to do all these wonderful things with my body (like, ahem, lose all this extra body-ness I'm carrying around). 

So I plan to start my running program this upcoming Monday, which seems like it's getting here... waaaaaaayyy too fast. Ugh. 

This is my plan for the first week of this adventure:

Each day I'll begin by walking for 5 minutes, and ending with a cool down of walking for another 5 minutes. 

Day One (Monday, July 28) - Here goes nothing! Walk for 2 minutes, Run for 1 minute (repeat 7 times).

Day Two (Tuesday, July 29) - One down, let's go. Walk for 2 minutes, Run for 2 minutes (repeat 6 times).

Day Three (Wednesday, July 31) - By now, I'm probably freaking out because I'm super sore, but hey! Worth it! RIGHT? Walk for 2 minutes, Run for 3 minutes (repeat 5 times). 

Day Four (Thursday, August 1) - If people see you running, just remind yourself 'they're wishing they had the motivation you do right now.' Walk for 1 minute, Run for 3 minutes (repeat 7 times). Seven? Seriously?

Day Five (Friday, August 2) - I know it's Friday, but don't quit now! Walk for 1 minute, Run for 4 minutes (repeat 5 times). 

Day Six (Saturday, August 3) - Last day of this week, almost there! YES YES YES. Walk for 1 minute, Run for 5 minutes (repeat 5 times). 

Day Seven (Sunday, August 4) - REST DAY. I might do some yoga or pilates or maybe just go for a walk with my mom and our dogs, who knows? I can do whatever I so choose on this day. And I love that feeling, I'm sure. (: 

[getoutofyourownwaybydevikay]

My Goals

Okay, so last night (at like 4am, of course) I sat and I wrote down all of the things I would like for myself to have achieved by the end of this year.

And, here they are...

Lose 56 pounds (weight in at 130 pounds - instead of 186 - and put me smack dab in the healthy range of BMIs at 21) I know it seems like a ton of weight to be dropping in like, what, 3 or 4 months? but still. I feel like it needs to happen, and if I don't write down that number, if I don't spell it out for myself, I'm afraid I won't work as hard as I need to to eventually get there. So there it is!

Run every single day (except for Sundays, because those are rest days and we all need those, right?!) I'm not much of a runner, per se, and I never really have been. I played sports in high school and I ran track, but I was a hurdler and a sprinter. So I'm trying to work up my endurance and stamina in order to be able to run about a half an hour a day.

Love yourself (while you're a work in progress, too!) This has always been a tricky category for me, so I've decided to work on that, too. It's been tough for me to accept who I am for what I am, and I'm tired of living that way. So I'm going to look in the mirror each day and love what I see, whether I've yet to reach my goal or not.

Spend time with God everyday (okay, so I know this may not be for everyone) I've felt myself drifting from my faith lately, and it's not something I enjoy. I feel disconnected from my church family and I find myself feeling hopeless a lot, so my goal is to do some Bible reading every night and pray every night and every morning. Just something to center myself and remind myself why I really want to do this. 

Keep up your grades (at least, don't lose sight of them for all of this other stuff you're working on) I'm still a college student, by all means, and I can be easily distracted. So, PRIORITIES. 

Stay organized (like, really organized, AND MEAN IT) Okay, so I have this terrible habit of making 800 schedules for every day and then I end up just sleeping anyway. In the end, I'm hoping that this won't be the case anymore because I'll have a r o u t i n e, even though I absolutely hate that word.

NO more pop (or soda.. or soda pop.. whatever you call it) I'm from Iowa, okay? And here, it's pop. You know, that bubbly, carbonated, 27 flavored, nectarine of the gods? Yeah, Dr. Pepper is my weakness. My kryptonite. 

STAY AWAY FROM BLACK OLIVES (funny story about this here.) So recently I had these really random allergic reactions, where my lips swell up to massive sizes like you've never seen, and I've had to go to the ER and get a prescription for epipens.. the whole 9 yards, as they say. It turns out, I'm allergic to black olives - which is super horrible because I LOVE, LOOOOVEE, LOOOOOVVVEEEE, black freaking olives, and have eaten millions of them in various sittings throughout my lifetime. Can't do that anymore though! Unless, you know, I possibly want my throat to swell shut and then I could die and all that fun jazz. 

Less cursing (haha, again) alright, I have a terrible little potty mouth, and I'm not too proud of it. I wanna be the good girl my momma expects me to be, okay?! So, I'm trying to clean up my act... or my tongue, I guess?

Don't give up on yourself (ever, ever, everrr) I have this terrible tendency to doubt myself at the first sign that I'm not doing everything 100% perfectly. I blame myself. For, well, pretty much, everything. And anything. And I need to stop. That's all there is to it. 

Put your needs first, now is about you (not to sound narcissistic here) I have this other terrible tendency to forget what it is that I want, or even what I need and, again, it's something I need to quit. Drop it like a bad habit! I forget that other people can do things for themselves, and sometimes it's okay to let them. I can't fix everything, or everyone, and I need to be cool with that.

[getoutofyourownwaybydevikay]

Why this? Why now?

Okay, so here's the thing.

I'm fat. I'm unhealthy. I'm overweight. I'm obese. 

According to my BMI Calculator (one I googled...) I'm at a thirty. What should I be at? 18.5-24.9. 

So yeah, here I am. I look in the mirror, and I'm not the same girl I once was. I feel slow and tired all the time. None of my jeans fit, and all of my tshirts seem to be shrinking. I'm tired of hiding and covering up.

I want to change all of this. 

This blog is to help me keep motivated to do it. 

In hope that I'll actually stick to my guns on this, I'm keeping a blog, so that maybe one day I can share it... or maybe I'll just keep looking at it from time to time to remind myself why I started all of this in the first place.

Yeah, I get it. I'm not chronically ill... I shouldn't be unhappy with the great life I've got. But for the first time in my life, I'm not comfortable in my own skin. 

Don't get me wrong, it'd be nice to look good in a bikini again, but that's not my reason for doing this. I want to feel good again. I want to look in the mirror and think, "Yeah, that's me, and I worked to get to this point." Not look in the mirror and think, "Oh my God, are those stretch marks there?!" (I honestly don't know how it's even possible that those pesky stretch marks do pop up seemingly overnight.)