geneticslad

[geneticslad]

I was sad, but now I am not.

It is usually the other way around. But this time, I overcame the grey cIoud of sadness. I was planning on writing a gloomy blog before going to sleep, except this took a different direction in just a snap. For context, I am romantically committed. Just as in my case which is usual, I like to overthink things. I was contemplating the whole evening if I am "happily taken". Why do I think such? Because I saw my love sharing posts on FB and we have not talked for the whole day! Would have appreciated a courteous "Hi" from him, but our chat box was lifeless as the Dead Sea. So, I did send him a chat. A simple "Hello". He replied. And since he is feeling down lately (which reason I have no business putting here), our convo has revolved around the unhappy. My chats were bland and flavorless than my usual colorful, warm replies. The depressive exchange was draining my motivation to return his messages. So took a pause. I made an alibi that I will be working on some teaching-related stuff and took a break from our chats. With that in the back of my mind, I did some tasks for work. I finished preparing a 24-item quiz for my first period tomorrow and downloaded some journal articles for later reading. At this point, I am still overthinking, and sad. So, very plainly, I said good night to my love. No hint of feelings in the chat. Out of nowhere, he said that he loves me. This. His chat was the snap. I was smiling in an instant. Then and there, I dropped the overthinking, and embraced my happily taken status.

PS. This was written in a bit rush. I am sleepy.

[geneticslad]

I should start blogging this year.

My thoughts are overpouring. Faster than my left hand could put them into paper. So, I decided to start sharing them in my Tumblr space -- a sort of blog. This is to silence the noise, random thinking, distractions, and moments of loud pauses in life. So, in the future, I can look at those moments in hindsight.

[geneticslad]

I'm working on my self-awareness.

[geneticslad]

2022 will be good for me. It is my year.

[geneticslad]

Parang nauubos ako.

[geneticslad]

"Not arrogant, just better."

[geneticslad]

I'll go home happy today!

[geneticslad]

It's now morning, and I still can't sleep. Today, i am going to be extra tired.

[geneticslad]

So, I can't sleep once again.

This is getting out of hand. Should I buy more melatonin? But I feel soooo groggy the morning after.

[geneticslad]

Sometimes i would just stop from doing anything (aka writing) bc i'm overwhelmed with the amount of things going on in my mind.

[geneticslad]

I don't know but maybe these anxiety attacks from not finishing my writing will soon come to pass.

[geneticslad]

Care.

You go ahead with your duties, gene. Your students deserve all of your efforts. You care about them. Don't mind your workmates. Work on yourself.

[geneticslad]

I am not, by any means, great. But I can be so much better.

[geneticslad]

I am reinstating at my home university and go back to teaching.

I will do my best for my students and the Filipino people who paid for my education from my undergrad years up to now in my graduate studies.

[geneticslad]

Anyone who doesn’t understand how things work is probably someone you don't wanna work for.

A reminder to self.

[geneticslad]

Now that is just utterly disgusting behavior.

[geneticslad]

I have anxiety