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This oddly fits a campaign I wrote about a dark elf (blue elf in my created universe) being controlled by a dragon who worked with blood magic.

The Last Ignition by Pearlpencil

Featured on Cyrail: Inspiring artworks that make your day better

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Bitch WHAT THE FUCK

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Die

A normal D&D session, but everybody except the DM must...

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A purple dragonborn, as based on the purple dragon of the underdark (I plan on redo-ing that homebrew, sometime soon)

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I ran my 1st DnD campaign the other day, here's what happened:

- The elven ranger would accidentally jump over enemies while trying to kill them. He eventually hit his head on a ceiling. - The elf also tried to hit on a barkeeper, but he was very literal in everything he said. He asked for a room for his companions, then asked if he could use hers while she was in it. He did not succeed. - The dwarven cleric ran up a hill towards goblins, not with a weapon out, but flexing his arms and yelling at the top of his lungs, “THESE GUNS ARE A BLAZIN’!!” He also slammed his battleaxe on the floor to “Test the durability of the floor.” - A human wizard wouldn’t listen to the narration of the story, because he was lost in his books. - The wizards son (who gave everyone nicknames and was a ninja who got kidnapped and possessed by a volcano cultist) started to dive underwater but remembered he had an intense fear of drowning and started to flail wildly, waking a group of stirges. - A half orc nomad was the butt of most jokes, and broke a table in the middle of battle to get a table leg for the sake of having it.

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There is a portal to the abyss. In your wizard’s ass.

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To the person who put this together, BLESS YOU

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Perhaps more salt will be needed though

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Death’s Scythe (by BookWyrm17)

[The following text has been edited for accessibility. Image source: Angi-kat]

This wooden staff feels heavy in your hands, unnaturally so. Reaching up to the edge, you find there is a blade hidden in the hilt, that flicks out in one smooth, silent motion. The edge is so sharp you feel nervous even getting near it. Surely only the most foolhardy would test the blade on themselves.

The Scythe is ready to reap what must be taken in, and use its power to sow new ground. It starts in staff form, but it can be opened into a large scythe that gleams even in the shadows. It has the following attributes:

Heavy, two-handed, Reach. 

Staff form: 1d8 bludgeoning damage. 

Scythe form: 1d10 slashing damage.

Can be opened into a scythe or closed into a staff as a bonus action.

When you use the blade to reduce a creature with at least 5 INT to 0 HP, you gather one soul into the blade, preventing it from escaping to the afterlife. For every three souls gathered, the weapon gains a +1 magic bonus, capping at +3.

As a bonus action, you can release souls in return for power, regaining 1 spell slot level for every three souls released.

The souls all escape when you take a long rest, resetting the Scythe back to normal.

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Survey Corps: Oh thank God the Female Titan was defeated…many have died but at least there are no more titans in the area!

Titan:

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Can you explain the "crack open a cold one with the boys" meme to me please? Lmao how did it even start and what does it mean. I keep seeing it involving like zeke and the warriors lol

Oh anon, you came to the right place. First thing’s first, we have to understand the when of a meme in order to fully understand its context. I made this neat little timeline by the week for this occasion.

So now that we’ve established that, we need to understand the what. As you’ve already mentioned, the meme deals with cracking open what? That’s right. A cold one. Next, the who and why.

That’s the who. The who is the boys. We know about cracking open a cold one, we know about the boys, and we know that Saturday is for the boys.

Now, the why.

Here we can see Zeke with Reiner and Bertholdt. They are both guys. Collectively, they are the boys. As we know, Saturday is for the boys, and the boys are for cracking open cold ones with. Zeke is with the boys, hence the cracking open of cold ones.

No but for real, it’s one of the first ironic memes that caught on. The entire point is to take something inherently un-memeworthy, and turn it into a VERY powerful meme.

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“Do you want to inherit the armoured titan?”

[More comics]

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Hyper Sonic is the most powerful...

And I wish they would bring him back

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I have no shame in admitting I'm not the best author. Heckles, I'm not even a good author. But my story, my book, is the bomb.

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Spirit Warriors Volumes I-IV

https://www.gofundme.com/2gtptnw