gayspaghett1 - Tumblr blog

[gayspaghett1]

boys w tits r probably one of the bestthings ever

[gayspaghett1]

can i ask u your opinion on some of the tgirl horny posting on this website? jddjjddj im asking so im not creepy. like a lot of it focuses on tgirls as tops, with very little comment on how e changes ur body + horny levels + being able to get hard... like they always treat the penis like a penis and not like, the ambiguous clit i feel like in my experience is most common w trans lesbians? not that tgirls dont like topping but like it's not very easy depending on ur meds, ur hormone combo, etc etc yk this i dont need 2 preach to the choir lol. anyway i wanted to ask if you feel like this comes from like, a fetishizing pov from people who want to fuck/be fucked by these girls and from like, a lack of knowledge about their own bodies, the feeling that you need to perform in a specific way and like, complete lack of touch with the actual practical effects of HRT for girls. feel free not 2 reply or not post this. also i feel like a lot of tgirl lesbian stuff is very pussy focused and tgirl on tgirl lesbianism gets pushed aside :(

oh this is a very insightful ask

i'll lead by saying that diff women's bodies react differently to HRT and some women have particular HRT regimens that allow them to top basically whenever. that's not my experience at all! whenever i'm hooking up with someone for the first time i tell them outright that sometimes my clit decides to do penis-drag (shoutout to Mira Bellwether for putting that in my forever lexicon) but more often than not it's going to behave like a clit. and it super depends on what your specific HRT cocktail is; i'm on a high dose of sublingual estradiol and i take a double dose of progesterone PLUS i have been on anti-androgens for four years. the crossroads of all of those medications is obviously going to be leaning toward erectile dysfunction LOL. but we persevere.

i think that what a lot of this actually boils down to is that regardless of how trans women (especially lesbian trans women) have sex irl the way that people imagine we have sex because of porn casts a shadow over us that we have to live under. and unfortunately for a lot of trans women who are earlier in their transitions that is something that is really easily internalized as something to live up to, which can be really toxic and hurtful especially if your hormones start doing what they did to me! i think that it's less about fetishization that originates within community and more about internalization of messages that result from fetishization from outside of the community.

as for the last part i feel exactly the opposite; i feel very underrepresented in conversations about transfemininity and especially about transition because there is so little conversation about what bottom dysphoria is like experientially and really nobody wants to hear about the process of becoming eligible for vaginoplasty. i think actually that we have been oversaturated with conversations about gock/girldick/etc

[gayspaghett1]

when a guy's chest bounces while he's being fucked... that's art to me

[gayspaghett1]

thinking about that one moment when I was about to get top surgery

[gayspaghett1]

transmasculinization/forcemasc-spin on self improvement? i need a guy that pushes me to do my best, as bros should.

imagine your roommate encourages you to get out of bed early so you both can go to the gym together. he tells you to stop hiding on the treadmill and introduces you to weightlifting. your confidence grows, and so does your body.

he teaches you how to cook and make healthy meals. you start to feel better because you’re eating more vegetables and you’re not skipping breakfast. you start seeing more results because of the better nutrition.

he notices that your room is dirty and asks whether you want to live like this. you tell him that you don’t, and he asks you what’s keeping you from getting up and changing for the better. you don’t know. instead of getting frustrated, he helps you out of bed and into the shower. once you’re done, he gives you some of his clothes because yours are all dirty. you realize you like the feeling of boxers over panties.

you notice that he’s started reading every night before bed, so you start reading more than him. soon it becomes a competition to read as much as you can. once you finish your books, you two talk about what you read and learned. the conversation is easy and fun, and he’s interested in what you have to say.

you have a job interview to go to, but you don’t have any masculine professional clothes. he lends you some and gives you tips. be confident. shake their hand firmly. negotiate the pay.

he makes you go to bed early so you feel energized for the next day. he teaches you that you should brush your teeth and do your skincare before you’re ready to go to sleep, so you’re not too tired to do your evening routine.

at the end of the week, he asks you whether you’ve had a good week. you think about how well you’ve treated your body. how you honored your sleep. how you made times for the things you wanted in your life. you tell him it’s been a good week. he smiles and pats you on the thigh. he leaves his hand there and you think of ways to thank him

[gayspaghett1]

Academic forcemasc is so fun bc it looks different for every area of study. Giving him his tshot as a reward after he correctly solves a certain number of equations. Reading him old poetry from long-dead men who loved the same as he does. Showing him paintings or plays or films solely to spark that strange feeling in his stomach, the nagging in his brain towards what he truly is. What he could be.

[gayspaghett1]

Everyone loves forcemasc dumbification but I need the opposite SO BAD

Academic validation forcemasc. Telling him how smart he is. Lending him old, queer books with underlined passages about the beauty in his masculinity, in loving men as he does. Take advantage of his need for knowledge, for validation. Give him the information he never knew he needed and praise him when he starts to internalize these ideas. Bring him to write his own experiences and compare him to those poets he reads so much.

[gayspaghett1]

(detail from ‘Portrait of Duke Alessandro de' Medici’ c. 1510-1537 by Circle of Bronzino)

[gayspaghett1]

the butch/femme scene of 1990s san francisco by chloe sherman

[gayspaghett1]

I have heard from many trans and/or Autistic queer people that they like the idea of casual, anonymous sex of the sort that happens in the gay bathhouse, or the park marked on the Sniffies map, but they fear they will never be able to access it themselves. 

They assume that a trans person won’t ever be welcome, or that because they do not read neurotypical social cues with ease, the cruising ecosystem will forever remain inscrutable to them. Many harbor concerns about safety, having only ever been taught by movies and Law & Order episodes to associate cruising with seediness, criminality, and “threatening” male sexuality. 

I’m here to tell you that none of those impressions are accurate. Trans people are in the cruising spaces. We have always been there, we helped to shape these hidden corners and dusty backrooms into what they are, and for the vast majority of cruising patrons, our presence is not only welcome, but totally blasé. There are even trans-specific cruising nights in many areas! (See the bottom of this article for a list of Chicago-based ones!)

And though getting acclimated to the social norms of the sauna (or dungeon, or cruising bar) might seem confusing at first, it’s quite easy to study and mimic, even if you’re disabled. In many ways, it’s refreshingly more direct than most other forms of socializing. The cruising spot can be an arena for vanquishing shame, if you let it. 

Finally, it is important to note that it’s the seediness and secrecy of a cruising space that makes it so safe — it’s a self-policing community of queer people who respect the location, rely upon it, and who look after one another without the intruding eye of the straight public or the cops. 

If you’re queer and neuroweird and horny and you’re contemplating cruising, there is a place for you. You just have to overcome your understandable anxieties, study up on common cruising practices, and then venture forth to give it a try (maybe with a buddy the first time). 

In this piece, I will lay out some basic principles for cruising as a trans or Autistic person (though I think this advice applies broadly to anyone who feels a little out of place in cruising spots, which is everyone at first), explain the finer points of visiting backrooms, saunas, and parks specifically, and then I’ll wrap up with a list of resources for readers looking to find a cruising spot in their area. I’ll also close out with a list of cruising-related events in Chicago that are specifically T4T or sapphic in nature, because frankly, us gay dudes are wildly overrepresented in the scene. 

The full essay is free to read (or have narrated to you in the Substack app!) at drdevonprice.substack.com

[gayspaghett1]

People who get hung up on the fact that forcemasc sometimes focuses on the destruction of femininity don't understand that trans men and butches do not find femininity liberating. We're told our entire life to shut up and close our legs. We're punished for living as our authentic selves and rewarded for putting up a facade. For what? For the comfort and perceived safety of others. At best, we're told that who we really are should be kept behind closed doors, away from the public eye, away from impressionable "women" and children who might want what we have!

For me, femininity is oppression. It is a cage. Masculinity is freedom. It's my freedom. I'm a man and I deserve it. I need a partner who understands that.

[gayspaghett1]

i’m in such a nasty mood. i need a job and some faggy oral sex

[gayspaghett1]

doesn’t it feel better than crossing your legs?

[gayspaghett1]

I know this is an emotional statement that not everyone wants to hear, but forcemasc and autoandrophilia are literally my favorite because they let me be myself in the bedroom, which is something I never got in my previous long term relationships.

It feels nice to be wanted as a man, as a masculine, weird, gross, hairy, chubby, and sometimes disrespectful man, without being reduced to what I used to be.

Like, so many people are afraid of masculinity, and embracing it as a trans guy who's already been told by society, family, peers, ect that those things are unwanted is really freeing.

Plus I'm just a gross transfag in general so like.... Why not love myself?

[gayspaghett1]

women in gear but no jersey…so erotic to me…

[gayspaghett1]

New trans stickers I made :]

[gayspaghett1]

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