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leering

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To keep up with my tradition from last year, For 25 days, I will post a holiday themed anime picture.

Day 22: Cardcaptor Sakura

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an incomplete taxonomy of christmas music

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pretty guardian 🌙

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"Sorry, what was that?"

"I said 'you, me, and the stars.' you know, they're always watching."

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Here is my yearly Wedding Peach drawing. I hope you like it~

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If that doesn't have potential for some fairytale nonsense, I don't know what does.

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A Short Hike ⛰️

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to be honest I think working on a sewing machine strains my eyes as much as being on a computer does. However, I am incentivized to remain alert and focused by keeping my fingers within stabbing distance of a needle making 60 stitches per minutes.

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every time i listen to “you’re a mean one mr. grinch” i can’t help but sit there and think “what did the grinch do to hurt you?” because dude just stands there for 2 minutes and 58 seconds and drags the grinch into the dirt

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King's Station

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Rainbow Eucalyptus trees get their colorful appearance when they shed their bark, starting with bright green patches that gradually transform into orange, maroon, and blue hues

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Made a new poster! :)

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popular YouTube channels are great and informative until they make a video about a topic you're informed on and then the house of cards comes crashing down as you realize how utterly wrong they are about most things

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Everyone told me testosterone would make me angrier. My family has a habit of attributing any anger I feel these days to the testosterone. I didn't feel any angrier, but my mother would still tell me that no, I am angrier now, and testosterone did make me angrier and *she* could tell.

A week or two ago, I got my proof to the contrary. I'd been having a difficult day, woke up late, and had to rush out the door, ran into minor inconvenience after minor inconvenience, and then the straw broke the camel's back.

I wrote out the kind of angry vindictive seething text message I used to write constantly. I didn't send it, of course, I copied it out and pasted it in the folder of my notes where I put all my rage venting.

And then I thought.

Huh, it's been a little while since I did that. And I checked the time and dates on my previous notes. The last one was a few days before I started testosterone.

And scrolling back, I noticed that they were *constant* at least one a week for *years* I used to get so angry that I would get the serious urge to say cruel hurtful things to or about people I cared about on a near-daily basis. I didn't realize how big of a problem it was until all of a sudden I hadn't gotten that angry in Eleven Months. Nearly a YEAR.

And then I realized in my rush to get out the door in the morning, I hadn't taken my T shot. My testosterone was the lowest it's been since August.

All of a sudden, I had demonstrable proof that testosterone really did make me less angry. That all that "you may not think you're any angrier but you are" was bullshit.

I feel like I should be angrier about this than I am. I know how angry I used to get. About everything. I just felt it again for the first time in a while. For once, it would feel justified to be that angry. But I'm not. I'm not mad. I'm just... disappointed, I guess.