fulfilledbytheafterglow
sustenece
Sustenance: "food and drink regarded as a source of strength; nourishment"
.. but what about sustenance for emotional nourishment
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When Ben and Casey showed up at her door, she threw on her slip on vans as they dragged her out of the house, unaware of what she was getting herself into. She had been inside all day. Seasonal depression was real and sucked butt. Her best friends somehow knew the perfect cure even though Alana couldn’t tell them that. She needed to keep up a tiny bit of her “cool girl” front.
“Okay pick a number between 1 and 5,” sang Casey. Alana was a bit confused as to what was going on as the trio walked down Broadway.
“4?” Alana said, slightly suspicious of her best friend’s motive.
“Amazing! Looks like we are staying out until 4 in the morning”. Alana looked to her right to see Ben’s grin plastered on his face.
“We are going to be edgy teens!” Exclaimed Ben. As much as she was skeptical of the pair’s plans for the evening, she felt a slight thrill in going with the flow and being with two of her best friends. School had been getting quite serious lately with applications for universities and grad transition plans and Artona photos and everything felt too serious. Whatever happened tonight, Alana knew she would be grateful.
“Okay! So first stop is Walmart. We need eggs, a disposable camera, two boxes of Poptarts, an oversized t-shirt, and a William,” stated Casey as she read off what looked like a list from her phone. By picking up a William, Alana assumed that she meant the trio would be adding a fourth member when Will got off his shift.
Ben, Casey, and Alana walked hand in hand to the Walmart. The walked in a silence that wasn’t heavy. It was a buzzing silence. Comfortable but electric with the possibilities of the night ahead.
“Last one there is a rotten egg!” Shouted Ben as he began to sprint towards the white light of the store. Alana, having done track for the past 4 years, sprinted after Ben, getting to the automatic doors before him. Casey took her precious time and waved from the middle of the parking lot.
“Right, I forgot that you’re good at this,” Ben managed through deep breaths as he panted lightly. She was good at it and it was something she prided herself on.
As soon as Casey got to them and Ben had caught his breath, they walked into the fluorescent-lit space.
“Pals!” Shouted a voice to their left. They turned to see their friend William yank off his name tag and practically jump from his cash station. He moved quickly towards them with open arms, gathering them into a squishy group hug. Alana felt a little bit giddy. She thought that she would spend the night messing around on photoshop until it felt late enough to sleep but she felt so happy to be with her friends. She could get caught up in her head but they managed to take her out and she felt so alive. Alana couldn’t wait to find out where the night was going to go and she couldn’t wipe the smile from her face.
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It wasn’t until I left that I understood that I had just experienced the best day of my life. My body ached not only because of the barricade that has been digging into my ribcage and a frantic dancer behind me, but in my heart. I didn’t know I was missing it until it was right in front of me, or they were.
I had listened to Waterparks for a little over a year now but I never really got into them as a band. Yes, I knew the name of their album and EPs and I had a general idea of what they looked like but it wasn’t until my friend gave me her extra meet and greet ticket that I was strapped in for the wild ride.
I skipped my last block that day to go line up for the concert. I had lined up for shows before, even for periods as long as 11 hours just to get a good spot in the venue. For this gig I wasn’t as worried for my pit placement because the Rio was pretty small and the meet and greet gave us early entry to begin with but also because as much as I liked Waterparks' music, I didn’t need to wait for hours in the rain outside of the venue to prove my everlasting love.
When I got there, around two hours before the VIP people got to go in, there wasn’t even much of a line and compared to most concerts, I was not too nervous. All of the sudden, Awsten, the lead singer of the band walked out from the tour bus and in through the front doors. He smiled at the group of us and said hi and walked in. My heart fluttered. I didn’t think I was going to get excited over such a simple interaction but I was wrong.
When the first round of people got to go in, the group I was a part of, we waited inside in a line as we went up to the Waterparks backdrop and met them one by one. I was shaking. I had only met band people a couple times before. When I went up to say hi and give them each a hug it all happened so fast. It wasn’t until I was walking away and into the main venue area that I could feel again. They were amazing. I was so happy.
There was then a Q and A with them and I got to ask a question and that whole hour from meeting them to talking to them and laughing felt so surreal and incredible. My heart soared. I felt like I could talk to them for hours and hours. When the actual show started, I was at the barricade and I was jamming out to all of their set and I had so much fun. Geoff, the guitarist, even took a selfie on my phone at one point and I got his guitar pick when he threw it into the crowd.
When I left the show I was frozen. I had just had the best day of my entire life and My heart yearned for more. I was engulfed in the afterglow and I felt fulfilled and alive.
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When I was young, my dad and I would go for late night drives in his old Mercedes and listen to classic rock songs in the darkness. It was usually after dinner and we would get out of the house and spend time together in the silence. There are some songs that transport me back to those days because I was so engulfed in the songs that they became engraved in my memory. Something about it was inspiring. The rhythm of the tires on the asphalt and the rhythm of the music calmed my heart and mind. I felt so utterly relaxed and alert at the same time. Cars and music are a pairing that I adore.
My dad had to sell his car a while back so we didn’t go on drives like we used to way back when. However, this summer my mom and I began to do it. She would pick me up from work and we would drive without a destination. I would make mix CDs full of different songs, artists, and genres, and we would just explore our city with our own soundtrack. At times, it almost felt like we were in our own movie. Sometimes we would get ice cream or drive past a cool spot and stop to take some pictures or drive really slowly through neighborhoods, pointing out the houses we liked. I always picked the right song for whatever we were doing, even if it was nothing.
For such a simplistic activity, it made me so happy. Music has always been a big part of my life. I am constantly finding new artists, going to concerts, and jamming out in my room when I’m home alone. Being able to listen to what I love with someone I love while doing something I love was perfect.
I have always craved adventure. Maybe it was because of the drives I went on when I was young but I love being in the car and getting to see so many different environments and people so fast. Or at least whatever the speed limit it. When my best friend got her driver’s license, we would find every excuse to go somewhere. At lunch, we would go to the drive-thru McDonald’s just because we could. On weekends we would drive to random locations and have spontaneous photoshoots. Once for my birthday, she drove me to Bellingham just to get Panda Express.
These adventures were never without tunes from our driving playlist. Over the years we had shared so many artists with each other that every song that came on shuffle would be belted out, often being filmed on my snapchat or sung in a dramatic duet. When I look back at my snapchat memories and see the videos of us unapologetically singing at the top of our lungs, I crave it. In those moments, I am beyond happy. I am overjoyed. Everything seems to feel like it is in its place because no matter where we are going or coming from, the journey in between can be the most fun.
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