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[fueselwe]

The end of One Piece is just gonna be:

Wow, we really made it across the entire Grand Line! We didn’t accomplish any of our goals on the way, but I‘m just glad we all made it out in one piece!

[fueselwe]

So I wrote a continuation to my previous story with the space and the shooting

Back at the base

After the attack by the Teatyckahnmi the base was rebuilt and training was to continue. Tom however was still in recovery, stuck in bed, barely able to move.

Barry, worried about his friend and wanting to know what‘s wrong, asked the physician, who is the resident expert on human anatomy and also happens to be a good friend of Barry.

“How did Tom sustain such injury? I saw how strong he was, shouldn’t he be able to take it?” Barry asks curiously. The Physician explains: “His strength is actually the problem. You see, human muscles are capable of incredible strength, so much so that it’s too much for too handle even for themselves. This is also why humans are weaker normally, their muscles are holding back so they don’t tear themselves apart. Imagine, if every muscle in their back contracted at full force their spine would shatter, and that thing is already built to last. These restraints are only lifted in high stress situations where someone valuable to the person is at stake”

Barry looked over at Tom, shocked at what his friend was willing to do to himself to save him. His mind was racing but he had another question:

“B- but what about before that? Seconds after it started Tom seemed different. Despite of everything he was focused, acute, composed, in the most chaotic situation he somehow performed more consistently than ever before. How?”, Barry asked, more curious than anything else. “That’s another thing you’ll find interesting; it’s a chemical callled adrenaline. See, in high stakes situations the human body releases this chemical, it affects pretty much all bodily functions; senses become more acute, concentration as well as strength is improved and they become all around more capable. And before you ask, the reason adrenaline is so closely controlled is because it too is harmful in uncontrolled amounts to a point where it’s detrimental to the very attributes it’s supposed to improve.”

Barry sticks around a bit and chats with Tom. Word of Tom’s feat spreads around, but… somehow it only stirred more ridicule, looking down upon who they claim is “so weak he can’t even take himself.” Barry was disgusted and shared it all with Tom during Barry’s frequent visits. Tom was enraged, thanked Barry for telling him and started preparing; he had something to prove now.

After his release and even a bit before that he started catching up on training in private, as well as honing some old skills he had all but abandoned until he joined the force.

One day it was time: he walked up to the most prominent clique that was making fun of him while they doing some targeting practice. It was quite a diverse group, with the unofficial Leader being Lo'Chum; a big, sweaty and scaly hunk of a being. Lo'Chum comes from a species of hermaphrodites. Tom found that out when he politely asked for their preferred pronouns once, which was also when Lo'Chum started taking an interest in Tom. Barry was watching from a distance, afraid of what could happen.

He makes his presence known and they look at him mockingly, wondering what kind of stupid stunt he was about to try and surely fail. One of them opens with “Oh, I see, you want to try and show us that you’re better than we think?”, “Sure” Tom snaps back with no hesitation. The conversation continues:

“Fine then, show us you can aim. Get a rifle”

“I’ll just take yours”

laughter ensues, “Yeah right, but no thanks”

Then… a precise grapple a strike strike Tom the joint loosened To'Chum's grip. Then in the blink of an eye with a sweep of the leg To'Chum was falling to the ground and Tom was holding the rifle. There was no time to react as Tom had hit every single target in one stroke. Without getting up To'Chum was back with their quips: “So you have that going, anything else? Maybe something your stubby arms are actually good for?”.

They start getting up when Tom turns around in a snap with his arm swinging. Everyone froze, no movements were made. Even Barry, who was watching from a safe distance was taken aback, trying to acess what had happened. To'Chum looks over and sees a knife stuck in the ground right next to them, so close it actually shaved off a single scale off their cheek. Tom had just thrown a knife at them, with the full intention of not hitting, but coming as close to it as possible, his stature and resulting balance having allowed this strength and precision.

They now get up, “I’m… sorry. I was wrong, will you forgive me and accept my respect?”. Tom, suddenly back to his normal, lighthearted and friendly self helps them up. “Sure! You’re great, now let’s keep this going as pals, like how it should have been”.

Tom leaves the confused and released group to chat some more with Barry.

Over time everyone overcame their newly gained fear for the human and Tom was finally a respected member, though Barry will always be special to him.

And Barry? He will never forget his best friend, who was willing to tear himself apart to save him.

I’m honestly not sure about this one, probably because my method consists of starting and just not stopping.

Ok I worked it over a little

[fueselwe]

Another one

Private Barry and the human recruit

Ba‘ri, a soldier in the intergalactic military (which is a thing that just exists),

was recently stationed to guard a training camp for new recruits. Nothing ever really happened, so he just watched the recruits all day.

One day came a recruit from the planet earth, which has recently joined the alliance and offered technological support in the war against the Teatyckahnmi. His name was Tom, he was the first human to enroll and he looked pathetic.

All species represented in the IM are tall, broad and resilient. Tom stuck out because of his short statue, thin and frail looking body and his pitifully short arms. His walk was what could only be described as a careful slither.

Now, Tom wasn‘t directly mocked. The IM values professionalism and respect, but the others still let it be known how little they thought of Tom, be it with their looks, their tone when talking with him or taking suspiciously heavier steps when near him -enough for him to jump-.

Tom started hanging with Ba‘ri, who at least didn‘t overtly judge and Ba‘ri liked the notion of spending time with this weak little fellow. Tom even nicknamed him Barry (an earth name), which he found cute.

When it came to actual exercises Tom handled himself surprisingly well; his body could be surprisingly nimble and his ways of movement bordered on ingenuity.

But still he was below everyone else. His feats were remarkable for his limited physique, but he was inferior.

One day came an assault from the Teatyckahnmi, both the stationed guards as well as the recruits were called to action. This wasn‘t too big for Barry, he had been in battles before, but he was sure Tom wouldn‘t survive and tried not to worry.

They fired from behind the barricades and while he survived, Tom still fell back in Barry‘s eyes. Yes, he could shoot and hit things, but he was slower than the others.

Then it happened.

An explosion. A hole was blown into the barricades and the soldiers were spread out. Barry could hear Tom screaming in fear. Barry tried to focus on the battle when something heavy fell on him, trapping him. Barry frantically looked around when he saw Tom holding the front, but something was different about him.

He looked panicked, shivered a little, yet still he moved differently. He was faster, more precise, more methodical. It was as if something changed in him.

Tom looked over, saw Barry and started running towards him, screaming in worry: “BARRY!!“ Barry was heartwarmed by the gesture, but there can’t be anything Tom can do here. That piece of debris had to be around a ton, Barry accepted his fate when he looked up and saw Tom, the frail human, lifting the the rock even Barry couldn‘t, granting him freedom.

The battle was over and Barry learned something new: Humans are strong, stronger than most, but it only shows itself when it needs to.

I waited until the end to say this: Teatyckahnmi stands for ���totally evil aliens that you can kill and have no moral issues”

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New one

Germaphobe Aliens

Humans are thoroughly talked about among the Tameeran (based on dialect it is also spelled as Tameiran, Tamiran, Tamieran or Tami’iran). There have been stories and scientific papers made about them, some schools offer human biology as a subject, and in all schools they are taught about as a bad example of how to live as well as to warn children of the danger emanating from them.

Now, Tamiran society has an enormous dedication to cleanliness, to a point where there are next to no other lifeforms in their cities. Any room is cleaned upon entry and exit (that part is automated), they touch things only with gloves (also cleaned after every use) and everywhere are bioscanners to look for anything remotely bacterial. Tami’irans do all of that to a point where they don’t have any natural defences against disease and the sort anymore (though it’s discussed whether they ever had any). To them, humans are so scary that some insist that they‘re an urban legend.

Their habitat is said to hold some of the most dangerous and disgusting things ever known. Many beings on their planet have what is called fur, it’s like a thick forest of little strains on the skin, which house all kinds of germs and at first it might seem that humans don‘t have fur, and that that separates them, but not only do they still have it (especially in all the intimate areas), they have something even more disgusting; along with what is already a chaotic breeding ground for vermin they have -ughhh- *sweat*. There are these glands on their skin that regularly excrete this *sweat*, which is a sticky, salty and smelly substance. It‘s disgusting and get this: It‘s supposed to help their skin.

And it doesn‘t stop. Human regularly and voluntarily expose themselves to all kinds of filth, ignoring it and even enjoying it! Humans have entire establishents where they submerge themselves in a mix of water and dirt, or heat themselves just to get covered in this sweat. It reaches a point where they have bacteria in their bodies to somehow *help* them digest. They eat all kinds of things with all kinds of filth on it, some even explicitly for the filth on it, like their cheeses. It‘s said that a Tamieran scientist once had an encounter with a human and supposedly it tried to greet them by *touching hands* without even any safety precautions, luckily our scientist behaved professionally and carefully (knowing when escape is the recommended option).

And that‘s somehow not the scariest part. Humans are also the most terrifying thing to have chasing you. They have otherworldly endurance; you cannot outrun them, even if you are faster they will follow you until you die. And in a direct encounter they seem harmless, not having natural weapons like the other creatures on their world, but a human‘s looks can be fooling, if you ignore their towering stature. When in danger or what is perceived as danger they unlock immeasurable strength that can shatter living beings, even themselves with their hard bones, oh yeah, bones: Inside them -to hold their structure intact- they have immensely thick and resilient bone structures that can even heal in case of breakage.

And their weaponry. As previously mentioned they don‘t have any natural weaponry, instead they mold metal into only the most harmful shapes, purposely made for either severing flesh or drilling into it at lethal speeds (but humans can somehow survive it).

If a human decides it wants to kill you, it can do so in various different ways, whether you know or not, to varying degrees of pain or speed, and they‘re cruel enough to do something like this. Who knows what a human would do to a Tameiran.

If you see a human: DO NOT ENGAGE. If you are forced to engage: RUN OR BE SUBMISSIVE, HUMANS CAN SOMETIMES BE CALMED BY PRAISING THEM, BUT THEY SEE THROUGH THESE ACTS AT TIMES

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I already said what I‘m doing

Human metabolism

After a sudden and unexpected acquaintance, the Quorn leaders are to meet with human ambassadors in the first in-person meeting to discuss first contact.

The meeting room was carefully prepared to be comfortable for Quorn, with the room temperature being exactly 10 quans, which is the optimal temperature for a Quorn.

The human ambassador and some guards enter, wearing formal clothing, looking stern and having what seemed to be a scientist with them. They sit down and try to initiate the conversation;

"So, we understand that we haven't met under the best of terms, but we want to assure you that we see this as a mistake and that we pursue only t-" the human suddenly stops, breathing in what could be only approximated as exhaustion, "I'm sorry. I know this is a formal meeting, but can I please take my jacket off?". The ambassador starts waving his hand into his direction.

The Qorn are confused at first, but politely answer "We- uhhh, don't mind". "Phew, thanks" says the human as he removes the upper part of his uniform, revealing a quite muscular upper body covered by a white tank top which looked weirdly damp. After that the other humans followed suit, only the scientist keeping their white coat.

"So with that out of the way," he continues, still waving his hand, "We assure you that we only wish for a peaceful coexistance, and that our first encounter was a misunderstanding. I want to personally apologise for any damage or injuries sustained", he said, now panting and fanning himself with the papers they brought.

The Quorn leaders were relieved to hear their commitment to non-aggression. They were about to start discussing the details when the human interrupted them again. "*Huff* I'm so sorry *huff*, but could you please *puff* turn down the heat in here? *pant*, Man, it's scorching in here... "

The Quorn leaders were stunted; "B- but we made sure that the room was in optimal condition, it's 10 quans, that should be perfect...", the human squints his eyes, "10 quans? How much is that?", he looks at the scientist, who looked like they were waiting for this. "So I've done a little research and measured some things and 10 quans is about 45°C".

The ambassador looks baffled. "Forty five?! that's- oh damn, is there a fan around here?", the scientist, who came prepared, takes one out of their case and puts it on the table. Switching it on caused the ambassador as well his guards to crowd around it, sighing in relief.

The Quorn ask, "May we ask about your need to cool yourself down? How did you survive like that? And why do you petrude this liquid from your bodies?". "It's a thing called sweating" says the ambassador, gesturing at the scientist again who, by now, has also taken off their coat and dropped the formal tone out of necessity.

"So... most life on our planet has a coat of fur on their skin to preserve warmth, but over time and through evolution humans lost that fur coat and gained access to sweat glands, which excrete liquid when the body heats up that allows for easier temperature exchange with it's surroundings, cooling the body down".

The Quorn leader only looks more baffled. "But why would you want to lose heat? It's precious and must be conserved, please elaborate". The scientist continues: "It's hard to explain without diving ludicrously deep into biology, but in short it's that human metabolism produces a lot of energy in the form of heat, to a point where it becomes uncormfortable"

The Quorn still asks, "But such a system would require hundreds of doons of food per day, are you saying that- oh god don't tell me...". The scientist preemptively whispers to the ambassador: "100 doons are less than a gram" and the ambassador starts laughing.

The Quorn leader has another question. "But with all that, why do you coat yourself in these uniforms, shouldn't those make it worse? I don't understand". "Me neither, bud" replies the ambassador, "but could you please turn down the heat? Here: I'll bring you the emergency thermal blankets from our ship"

The Quorn set the room temperature to 5 quans (approximatley 20 degrees celsius) and wait for the human, shivering until he tugs them into the blanket while precognitively answering the Quorn's next question: "And before you ask, it gets cold on our world, too... Huh, guess we're just from a more harsh planet..."

They finish the peace talks and end the meeting, with the Quorns shock having delevoped into wonder as they can't wait to further research the humans anatomy.

(For anyone wondering about how the human ambassador looks for some reason; just know I was picturing Scott Bacula (Captain Archer) while writing this)

Edit: Apparently I am a pansy, so I adjusted the temperatures

[fueselwe]

So I have all these little short stories of mine lying around and for some reason I am now bootloading them all onto tumblr

Humans are cute

Journal of Captain X[¿ørx

I was on expedition duty to study the wildlife of this planet when I found the humans. These little rascals were barely tall enough to reach my hips, but they still seem to have found a way to make this world their own, all in their own, cute little ways.

They have all these delightful rituals to seek enjoyment in their surroundings. For instance they are most definitely non-aquatic, their limbs are optimised for movement on solid ground and their lungs are exclusively made to process gaseous oxygen, but despite all that they have this enthusiasm for spending time near or in bodies of water. They even invented equipment to accommodate their need for oxygen underwater, just because they like being in water so much!

They have all kinds of little things to entertain themselves, some real, some fictional, one deep and complex, the other simple and straight forward. So much time is devoted to them, because they have fun and that‘s enough. It can even be as simple as decorating themselves with shiny things or emblems of what they admire.

They‘re also incredibly friendly toward the other creatures near them; they seek to aid them, prevent their suffering and just interact with them to a point where they adopt them into their home and care for them, merely because they find delight in taking care of something weak.

And don‘t get me started on all their quirks; they have certain automatic biological reactions to certain stimuli to mitigate harmful foreign substances, and they‘re so cute! I saw a youngling continually “sneezing“ and it was delightful to watch them get annoyed and complain about this little spontaneous head movement and exhalation.

And that‘s not it, they also have dedicated physical signals to indicate certain emotions, the most prominent one being crying, which is used to declare sorrow and seek comfort from others, and they‘re quick to comfort one another when that happens!

I really liked watching them dance around, doing their little things and just enjoying themselves. I‘m seriously thinking of getting one for myself, I can already see them prancing around my ship and exploring whatever comes towards them and I want that.

These things, so small yet so ambitious to find and share happiness with others.

Addendum: I have gotten ahold of one and it loves having it‘s back rubbed and hugging my leg, making all kinds of sounds to exclaim it’s joy. It‘s quite therapeutic

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Does this do it? I vomited this together in less than an hour

[fueselwe]