25/he/they/bi/name's Brian, this is my old folks home where I am basic as hell
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
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recently we were out on a hilltop taking photos of the comet and suddenly some car's headlights blind us from across the bay. literally four miles away.
who the fuck is out here with these nuclear fusion powered headlights. who puts naval searchlights on their fucking toyota tacoma.
#love tumblr because when I originally saw this it was a straight faced lamentation of LED headlights#then you can get a flipside that goes like this
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I had to take a piss test for a job I got hired at today, and this is the name of the fuckin company that makes the tests
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So there are several species of frogs that have evolved to be so small that their vestibular balance system doesn't work well and I'm sorry but it's the funniest thing to watch them try to jump.
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EVERYONE QUICK describe your oc story in the worst way possible
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(via (1) 福姫 on X: “またこの季節が来たわんか #ありがた迷惑 #いうやつわん #柴犬のいる暮らし #柴犬 https://t.co/OUUaydeIKx” / X)
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cannot stop thinking about the french man who during dinner responded to a person asking "should we be naughty and get desert" by pulling a face and going "naughty? it is chocolate, it is not an, uh, threesome"
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this is what happens to you when you listen to folk punk
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Accidentally wound up on "hear me out cake" tiktok, and I swear, if another one of these bitches puts down an at-most-unconventionally-attractive human man, Lady Dimitrescu or Nick Wilde/Robin Hood I am going to lose my fucking mind.
Saw one where the first person they named was Disney's Aladdin and I tapped out so hard I entered a fugue state and didn't regain full consciousness for like a solid hour.
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